Omswd Luci - Tumblr Posts
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #1
MC: People tell me I have a unique way of lighting up a room.
Lucifer: It’s called arson and those people are called witnesses.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #2
Satan: Something tells me MC’s going to be a bit more unhinged today...
MC, holding a lit match and a bag of cheetos: Leave me be, Lucifer isn't home to stop me, I'm going feral.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #6
Lucifer: Why is MC making me do the dishes again? You haven’t washed them in a week, Mammon!
Mammon: It’s because I’m MC’s favorite.
Lucifer: I hate you.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #7
MC: *pitches an idea*
Mammon, impressed: Huh, there might be something here!
Lucifer: Yeah, a lawsuit.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #12
MC: I have an idea.
Lucifer: A good idea?
MC: Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #13
Lucifer: Whenever MC gets mad at me, I tighten all the lids on our jars so they have to ask me for help.
-sound of glass shattering in the background-
Lucifer: It hasn’t worked yet, but it will.
-MC breaking all the jelly jars in the kitchen-
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #14
Mammon: Time freezes for everyone but you one day. What do you do?
MC: Oh… I’d mildly trouble everyone.
Mammon: Alright, so what would you do?
MC: I’d shave a one-inch thick line in every thick beard I saw.
MC: I’d twist all the lightbulbs just a little bit so no one would know when they aren’t working.
MC: I’d make every wing on girls eyeliner just a little bit higher than the other one.
MC: And I’d tie everyone’s shoelaces together.
MC: And then lastly, I’d snip a little hole in every tea bag.
Mammon:
Lucifer: Remind me to never allow you to have power.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #20
Mammon: Bet you can’t eat 15 crayons!
MC: Bet you I can!
Lucifer: *sips coffee, checks to make sure 911 is still on speed dial, and goes back to reading the paper*
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #21
MC: If I run and leap at Lucifer, he will most certainly catch me in his arms.
MC, running towards Lucifer: Coming in!
Lucifer: No! I’m holding coffee!
Lucifer: *Drops coffee and catches MC*
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #22
Lucifer: Don’t you have any dignity, MC?
MC: Uh, no.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #23
MC: I told Mammon that his ears turn red when he lies.
Lucifer: Do they?
MC: No.
Lucifer: Then why did you tell him that?
MC: Because I can do this.
MC: Hey Mammon! Do you love me?
Mammon, with his hands over his ears: N-no.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #24
Lucifer: I have the sharpest memory here - name one time I forgot something.
MC: You left me, Mammon, and Belphie in a Walmart parking lot at 2am a day ago.
Lucifer: I did that on purpose, try again.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #26
MC: Why do you act like we’re three year olds?
Lucifer, completely done with their bs: WHY?!?
Lucifer: *points at Mammon* YOU TRIED TO HYJACK A CAR!
Lucifer: *points at MC* YOU NEARLY JUMPED 20 FEET OFF A CARPARK!
Lucifer: *points at Beel* AND YOU ATE MULTIPLE DRIED LEAVES AND ROCKS OFF THE GROUND!
Lucifer: AND YOU ASK ME WHY????
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #28
MC: Every zoo is a petting zoo unless you’re a coward. Lucifer: I’m worried about you.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #32
Lucifer: Where’s MC?
Mammon: Around.
Lucifer: Around?
Lucifer: You don’t have any idea, do you?
MC, dropping down from above: Did you know there’s a space above the ceiling?
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #37
Lucifer: What are you writing?
MC: The government wants to know what kind of weapons we have in the house. I'm letting them know it's private information.
Lucifer, looking over MC's shoulder: This just says 'fuck around and find out' in calligraphy.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #41
Lucifer: I'm at a loss for words!
Mammon: Despite being ‘at a loss for words’, Lucifer yelled at me for the next 45 minutes.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #46
Mammon: Lucifer, I screwed up, big time.
Lucifer: Mammon, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #47
Beel: When I get Doordash I order 20 cheeseburgers at a time and heat them up throughout the week so that I don’t have to pay the delivery fee multiple times.
Lucifer: I hope you understand how food poisoning works.
Belphie: I hope food poisoning understands how Beel works. I never met a burger he couldn’t eat.
Obey Me! Incorrect Quotes #50
MC: Have I ever told you that I love you with my whole heart?
Lucifer: For the love of all that is unholy, I am not taking you to McDonalds. It’s 2am!
MC: Mean.