I Named The Fly In My Room Larry, He Landed On My Hand And I Think That Is The Closest That I Have Felt

I named the fly in my room Larry, he landed on my hand and I think that is the closest that I have felt to another living thing in days.

Tw: suicide

One of the friends I made while I was in the mental ward killed himself.

He was also a trans dude pre official name change or hrt. He was a few years older than me.

He loved art. He was really good at it. I got to draw into his sketchbook.

I didn't know him well but I did look up to him. I thought that maybe at his age I could also start doing better.

Now he is gone. He is dead. He will never get to have his own art gallery or feel right in his body.

I'll try for him now. And for all the other people that couldn't continue.

I'm glad I got to know him...

I'm so tireddd.

But I can't sleep. I just wanna sleep. Having a sleeping disorder sucks. And now it's already to late to take my meds because if I do now I'll be exhausted all day long tomorrow...

I just wanna sleeeeeep. Please?

I think I need to cuddle with someone and hear them breathing to fall asleep now...

Trying not to cry because I really like how my makeup turned out today

I love the smell of hair dye. It has saved me so many times already.

So yeah, since autumn is starting I went red again :)

The world is moving so fast, I wish I could just sleep for a while.

Preferably in his arms. Safe and protected. Just taking a break from the world for a few days.

My body feels so heavy and my mind is drowning in thoughts. I just want some peace, even for just a few minutes.