The World Is Moving So Fast, I Wish I Could Just Sleep For A While.

The world is moving so fast, I wish I could just sleep for a while.

Preferably in his arms. Safe and protected. Just taking a break from the world for a few days.

My body feels so heavy and my mind is drowning in thoughts. I just want some peace, even for just a few minutes.

I'm ashamed. I feel so guilty. I am so gross. I don't know. I don't know why I am like this...

When I'm crying but he texts me and now I'm giggling and he makes me so happy that I'm crying again but it's good crying.

Tw: scars

I'm feeling bad about my scars...

They are so ugly and just gross.

Not.scars overall, just mine. Just because they are on my body.

I want someone to tell me that it's okay, that my scars are a part of me and beautiful. That they don't change anything.

I want my scars to be kissed with gentle lips to be handled with care but also to not be acknowledged at all?

I want kisses all over my scars. To show love and tenderness? To make me feel whole.

Tw: sa and rape

No, because why does a fucking language trigger me just because he speaks it. Why?

Why does long blond hair trigger me? Why does the mention of a whole country just because he lives there??

Fuck this. Why does a staircase trigger me? My aunts house? Seeing my little cousins grow up? Cold blue eyes?

Everything that reminds me of him. The way he forced himself onto me. I just want to forget it

I don't want to get flashbacks and nightmares and all that ahit just because of this one man that couldn't keep his hands of a 6 year old.

i hate when i, a completely healthy person (very chronically ill), get sick (flare up) for no reason at all (i exerted myself way past my limit just cuz i didn’t wanna be “annoying”)