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*pulls up to the fanfic drive-thru window* uh yeah, i’ll take a fake relationship with a side of mutual pining and thinking the other isn’t interested, thanks

and if you turn to ur left you’ll see the emos

"Writing is art, not content."

-irrlicht-writes

I got a comment today that said smth along the lines of "I didn't wanna be weird commenting on a four month old fic"

Baby, bless your heart but four months isn't old by any means and ao3 isn't fucking instagram. Comment on fics you like, regardless of how old they are! The worst that could happen is you make an author's day. Writing is art, not content.

some people think writers are so eloquent and good with words, but the reality is that we can sit there with our fingers on the keyboard going, “what’s the word for non-sunlight lighting? Like, fake lighting?” and for ten minutes, all our brain will supply is “unofficial”, and we know that’s not the right word, but it’s the only word we can come up with…until finally it’s like our face got smashed into a brick wall and we remember the word we want is “artificial”.

the first three ducks are definitely named after the other Robin boys. he doesn't dare name any of them Cass or Steph out of fear they may take over the entire farm

when i say that tim drake should fuck off to live on a farm and have a flock of ducks just for funsies i also implie that the ducks have to have the most stupid goofy names, otherwise it's all pointless

I love this add-on because it implies Jason will (eventually) take on Alfred’s roll for them once they take over for Bruce (all while Jason has *somehow* still kept the bit going decades later)

time travel fanfic idea where Jason comes back to before he was adopted, him and Batman still meet and he still ends up being adopted by Bruce Wayne, but he just refuses to acknowledge Batman and Robin, he acts like a civilian boy, he has over thirteen extracurriculars that Bruce does his best to keep up with. He regularly works out and trains all the fighting he's learned over the years, he goes on a gap year before college to recuperate the all blades and pretends to be the civilian in a family of crime fighting vigilantes.

He's doing pre-med and keeps nagging his siblings to go to college too (Cass, Tim), Duke is the one who spends more time with him bc everyone else is nocturnal and sleep through the day, but Jason likes to drive Duke to his classes and pick him up so they can have lunch together, Damian had a hard time at first, because Jason speaks every language that he speaks and all bat related things have to stay at the cave, his league training didn't prepare him for a civilian brother.

During an attempted kidnapping during one of the Wayne galas, Jason's whole plan almost gets blow up because one of the guys has taken a woman hostage and his Red Hood fried brain just pounced on the dude with all his might, wrestled him for the gun and kept him stuck under his boot with the gun pointed between the guys brows.

He had to pretend to be scared when Batman came to the rescue and act like he didn't know how to handle a gun.

+ Alfred 100% thinks Jason was on a children gang and that's why he's so good with knives, guns and rifles, but who's he to say anything about people's past

Real sad that the Rivaere/Ereri fandom has died down a bit… please interact with me if you’re still active

"Evil Legolas" has me CACKLING

pls rb if you think cuddling doesn't have to be s3xual

im tryna prove a point to my bf's mother help me out

This is money cat. He only appears every 1,383,986,917,198,001 posts. If you repost this in 30 seconds he will bring u good wealth and fortune.

This is hysterical and I am crying. Definitely going in my Top 3 Cracky Headcanons., right next to Coulson/Fury forming the Avengers for the purpose of finding friends for their baby assassin Natasha

Danny, Dani, and Dan get deaged by a wish gone wrong. They get picked up by a loser in a furry costume.

Batman, having only been on scene for about half a year, still making mistakes and eating shit when he doesn't stick the landing, finds the trio of babies stashed away in an alley.

Batman's not doing so hot; he'd just fought a new rogue with strange abilities and only barely won thanks to being thrown through a case of occult antiques in the museum. In the end he'd managed to restrain the being by opening an ancient vase and imprisoning the villain in it.

The Dracula-themed villain had been a very difficult fight, and said fight had only proved to him that he had to train more. Get better. He was on his way home, actually.

Clearly someone left them there to pick them up later, given that there's a diaper bag with all of their names on it.

He drops them off at a baby drop-off and goes about his night.

Except he got attached.

The very next day he's so overcome with guilt he immediately looks into being a foster father for them. The process takes awhile, but he gets to foster them.

So by the time Dick comes into the picture, there's already three hellions toddling around, and he gets to be a big brother far sooner.

Also, the noise the toddlers produce helps him ease into life at the manor.

The hilarity behind these tags is not lost on me.

Like, sure, Jay's 1000% cool with death jokes when he's the one making them. Not so much when he's on the other end of it

What do you think would be the best (read, most hilarious and/or most traumatic) way for the Owl Song Titans or JLA to figure out what exactly the Talon part involves?

Apart from all the horrible little details about his life Dick lets slip over the years, I think the one that genuinely makes them “what the fuck” is if Dick casually gets killed in front of them.

And I’m not talking hypothermia hibernation state killing, I’m talking about shot-in-the-head-dead, or casually getting run over by a truck, or even having his neck audibly snapped.

You see, Bruce and Jason totally know Dick is gonna be fine. At this point into their careers, they’re more exasperated about Dick’s lack of self preservation than anything. Jason totally witnessed Dick walk into oncoming traffic more than once just because he saw an “on sale” advertisement for his fave cereal across the street.

Usually Dick just sits back up and keeps going like nothing happened. Broken bones are a hassle, sure. But his pain tolerance is genuinely concerning, so…

Anyway, Dick’s mischief extends to everyone who doesn’t know about his unique condition, so instead of sitting back up and laughing it off like he usually does, he plays dead for a moment. (Reader’s choice of it’s with the JLA or the Titans.)

And everyone is freaking out because, omg, Talon/Nightwing is dead. Omg. OMG. Someone watch Batman, he’s about to lose it. No, [insert name], CPR isn’t gonna cut it for a frigging head shot-

And then Robin just jams his hands into his hips and— nudges Dick with a boot. Repeatedly. Launching into an entire essay of how he’s gonna revoke cereal privileges if Dick keeps doing this shit and giving him a heart attack because “you totally could have dodged that you stupid bird” and then just devolving into angry hooting and chirping and-

Oh no. Robin’s lost it. Batman is about to-

But Batman just sighs, turns away, and proceeds to begin cleanup duties and-

Oh, okay. This is worse. They’re in denial.

But then Nightwing sits up with a pout because, oh no, Robin is totally serious about those cereal privileges now, and he’s NOT risking that.

Everyone screams. Someone faints.

Dick grins.

Bruce definitely regrets allowing Dick to choose how he goes about disclosing his Talon secrets to the others.

Not my dumbass aggressively trying to fix the volume and cursing out my audio when THERE'S ABSOLUTLEY NO SOUND OP 😭😭😭

We've all seen baby man Danny doing crazy stuff like take over the world and become president, mayor, defeat cults, or become a pet.

So imagine the typical baby man Danny being adopted by the Batfam

But one of the bat kids having the bright idea of giving him dog buttons

Made a real quick animation

NOT MINE

just sharing

why do i imagine the batfam finally meeting the league and then one of them going 'how the fuck do you have so many kids?' and little shit Jason goes 'well, when two people love each other very much...' and because Bruce doesn't wanna listen to this, he tiredly reminds Jason: 'you're adopted' which naturally means that Jason is going to dramatically pretend that this is the first time he's heard that and how could Bruce keep this from him, much to the horror of the league and the exasperation of Bruce

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE EXECS IN THE BACK

Still really funny that Marvel named a movie “Endgame” and sold it as the final culmination of the MCU where they killed off two main characters and retired a third and then were shocked when people started loosing interest in the MCU after that

because it's so elaborate, or because you forgot it already?

you couldn’t waterboard my ao3 password out of me

I’m sorry, hehe.. she WHAT⁉️

was anyone gonna tell me that Flashpoint Joker Martha killed Alfred, or was I just supposed to find that out for myself??

WHyyyy would you leave this gold in the comments 😂🤣😂🤣 “ill Victorian child state of being” ahhdkwsg

Batman AU

Batman tells Gordon that he doesn't kill. Thinking that it's a legality issue, Gordon deputizes Batman and gives him a gun and badge. Batman of course doesn't use the gun and just figures Gordon is stressed.

After Joker kills a Robin, Gordon starts to deputize the Batfam members.

Gordon: Next time you see that clown. Take. The. Shot. Rookie.

Robin (Tim, tiny ass 14 year old holding a 45 magnum): Umm... Yes sir?

Batman (plus all the Rogues, minions, and citizens of Gotham when Robin shows up with a 45 Magnum):

Anybody know any good Batman/BtVS crossovers?

Specifically any post-UtRH and -season 6 fics where Buffy and Jason interact. Not necessarily looking for a romantic ship, I just really really really wanna see these two not-dead kids having a snark-off about crawling out of their own graves. Because, yeah, both universes have plenty of characters coming back to life, but reverse grave digging seems to be distinctive to these two and they could have a lot of fun making their (extended) families uncomfortable with all the dead jokes they’d probably make

So because I haven’t cried about it on social media yet:

HANGE NEVER GOT TO SEE THE FLYING TITAN 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Question for whoever reads live action/animated crossover fanfictions

How do you see the story in your head? Do you mentally animate the actors? Do you come up with live action faces for the animated characters?

Because I am thoroughly enjoying a GOT x AoT story on ao3, but my confused brain can only come up with some Who Framed Roger Rabbit? mess 🫣

9 years later and this aged so wonderfully

bUT LOOK AT HOW SMALL LEVI IS NEXT TO EREN

AND YET EREN PRACTICALLY WORSHIPS THE GROUND HE WALKS ON DESPITE HOW FUCKING SHORT LEVI IS COMPARED TO HIM AND I FIND THAT FUCKING ADORABLE

Fanfiction Authors: HEADS UP

(Non-authors, please RB to signal boost to your author friends!)

An astute reader informed me this morning that one of my fics (Children of the Future Age) had been pirated and was being sold as a novel on Amazon:

(And they weren't even creative with their cover design. If you're going to pirate something that I spent a full year of my life writing, at least give me a pretty screenshot to brag about later. Seriously.)

I promptly filed a DMCA complaint to have it removed, but I checked out the company that put it up -- Plush Books -- and it looks like A LOT of their books are pirated fic. They are by no means the only ones doing this, either -- the fact that """publishers""" can download stories from AO3 in ebook format and then reupload them to Amazon in just a few clicks makes fic piracy a common problem. There are a whole host of reasons why letting this continue is bad -- including actual legal risk to fanfiction archives -- but basically:

IF YOU ARE A FANFIC AUTHOR WITH LONG AND/OR POPULAR WORKS, PLEASE CHECK AMAZON TO SEE IF YOUR STORIES HAVE BEEN PIRATED.

You can search for your fics by title, or by text from the description (which is often just copied wholesale from AO3 as well). If you find that someone has stolen your work and is selling it as their own, you can lodge a DMCA complaint (Amazon.com/USA site; other countries have different systems). If you haven't done this before, it's easy! Here's a tutorial:

HOW TO FILE A COPYRIGHT COMPLAINT FOR STOLEN WORK ON AMAZON.COM:

First, go to this form. You'll need to be signed into your Amazon account.

Select the radio buttons/dropdown options (shown below) to indicate that you are the legal Rights Owner, you have a copyright concern, and it is about a pirated product.

Enter the name of your story in the Name of Brand field.

In the Link to the Copyrighted Work box, enter a link to the story on AO3 or whatever site your work is posted on.

In the Additional Information box, explain that you are the author of the work and it is being sold without your permission. That's all you really need. If you want, you can include additional information that might be helpful in establishing the validity of your claim, but you don't have to go into great detail. You can simply write something like this:

I am the author of this work, which is being sold by [publisher] without my permission. I originally published this story in [date/year] on [name of site], and have provided a link to the original above. On request, I can provide documentation proving that I am the owner of the account that originally posted this story.

In the ASIN/ISBN-10 field, copy and paste the ID number from the pirated copy's URL. You'll find this ten-digit number in the Amazon URL after the word "product," as in the screenshot below. (If the URL extends beyond this number, you can ignore everything from the question mark on.) Once this number has been added, Amazon will pull the product information automatically and add it to the complaint form, so you can check the listing title and make sure it's correct.

Finally, add your contact information to the relevant fields, check the "I have read and accept the statements" box, and then click Submit. You should receive an email confirmation that Amazon has received the form.

Please share this information with your writer friends, keep an eye out for/report pirated works, and help us keep fanfiction free and legally protected!

NOTE: All of the above also applies to Amazon products featuring stolen artwork, etc., so fan artists should check too!