Adhdlife - Tumblr Posts
the restaurant I’m in has the tv on full volume and also music at the same time so obviously I’m on the verge of homocide
Sent this thread to our therapist and got a positive response.
Adhd isn’t all bad, when your brain works, it WORKS
Me: Hey can you work with me today?
Brain: Sure.
Me: Really? That easy?
Brain: Only when it is. When the proper conditions have been met.
Me: So how do I even-actually you know what? fuck it. Fuck it. Fuck it. I don’t even care. Let’s do this.
✨✨EXECUTIVE DYSFUNCTION✨✨
(or at least, how I experience it)
when your brain is a car that won’t start, it’s pretty annoying.
I saw this tweet about how things don't always "occur" to adhd people and I thought I could relate to it as well, although I'm autistic and not adhd.
For example - if I have a headache, it simply won't occur to me to take pain meds. I know I have a headache. I want the pain to stop. I am aware of the existence of pain meds. But the idea never occurs to me to take them until someone else suggests it.
The example they gave in the tweet was that if someone says hello to them, it may not occur to them to say hello back and yep... I do that as well.
I just never realized that other people may not do these things.
Warnings for autism and ADHD related ableism discussion
I think there's something really interesting about the different traumas acquired by being autistic or having ADHD in a shitty ableist society.
The two disorders have a significant amount of overlap. Of course they're not the same and each comes with its own challenges that the other may not have but, when compared with other disorders/neurodivergencies, for all intents and purposes they are very similar.
However, society's perception of them is almost the exact opposite, which gives people who have one or the other wildly different kinds of disabled trauma.
Society at large likes to think they know a great deal about each of these disorders, but really knows almost nothing. What it comes down to is this:
Society believes and treats autistic people as if their entire personality, capability levels, and potential to succeed as a human is hinged to their autism, and they don't have a confident outlook on that, so they treat autistic people as if they can't do anything or are stupid. Autistic people have to continuously fight to be seen as something other than their autism (or in addition to it, of course, because I don't mean to say they're trying to escape their autism)
And on the flip side, society believes that ADHD is a myth, an excuse, a made up word for children that won't behave or are undisciplined, or a childhood disorder that 'goes away.' People consistently underestimate the symptoms/traits of ADHD, aren't aware of them, or don't believe them. People with ADHD are constantly told that these symptoms/traits are their own shortcomings rather than part of their ADHD. ADHD people have to continuously fight to be seen as having the disorder that massively affects their lives.
Because of these nearly opposite societal takes on each of these disorders, despite their similarities, autistic people and ADHD people end up, largely, being traumatized in opposite ways.
On the one hand there are autistic people who have any failure blamed on their "inherent inadequacy" due to their autism, taking away their sense of ownership, control, and agency of regular, human mistakes or failures they've experienced. And on the other, you've got people with adhd who have failures that are actually caused by symptoms of their disorder being told that they simply didn't try hard enough or that they clearly don't care or it wouldn't have happened.
(also to clarify, I don't mean to say that autistic people don't also have failures or mistakes caused by symptoms and that ADHD people have some that aren't, just that no matter what caused it, this seems to be the societal response)
In the end, you get commonalities in both groups that are directly caused by these societal traumas. Actually, there are two extremes that happen in both groups for the exact opposite reasons, and, often, these extremes coexist/alternate depending on the company.
The first extreme is refusing to unmask and making yourself very serious. For autistic people this seems to also come frequently with a kind of shyness because they're afraid if they say something that's "wrong" or that shows they missed subtext, they'll give ammunition to those who infantilize them. For those with ADHD this extreme comes with constantly overworking themselves, killing themselves with stress, and minimizing every struggle because they're terrified that if they relax for one second, or validate that something was difficult because of their ADHD, the people who called them lazy are right and they're just making excuses for their shortcomings. They seek desperately to prove to themselves and others that they do try.
The other extreme is leaning heavily into the stereotypes and abusive accusations they've faced their whole lives. For autistic people, this can mean taking on learned helplessness and refusing to try new things because they believe they really can't do it by themselves, ending up with less agency because they rely on help they don't really need but are too scared to forego. For those with ADHD, it can mean developing class clown syndrome and completely giving up on trying because no matter how hard they try, they can never get a result that satisfies society when they're constantly fighting symptoms that hinder their success. Both of these are self fulfilling prophecies that end up pushing them into the hole they felt it was impossible to avoid.
People with both disorders get to flip a coin on which trauma they get more of. Regardless of which one led to more trauma, the results end up looking the same - they're likely to fit into one of the two extremes.
Anyway, I don't really have a solid point to all of this - it's just some observations I've made on how the trauma inflicted on both of these groups is wildly different and yet often yields the same results for opposite reasons.
If anyone has anything to add, I really would love to hear!
I’m a very messy person who tries VERY HARD to keep a clean home. It’s probably ADHD. Anyway, the best advice I ever saw about it was:
“Instead of changing your habits to keep clean, look at where the clutter is. Now put a bin under it.”
I tend to remove my socks at the computer and then there’s a mountain of socks on the floor? I put a small bin and now it looks tidy. There are piles of junk mail on the table near my front door because I can never bring them to the recycling bin? I put a smaller recycling bin there. Etc etc.
Another trick that helps me immensely are BOXES.
The bathroom sink is covered in small bottles and all sorts of products? I got small plastic crates and I put them over the toilet lid, one for my stuff, the other for my roomate’s. The linen closet is just piles of things that fall when you open the door? Baby I just got a bunch of baskets and I will separate them by function.
I have baskets and small boyxes for: my cleaning products; my bird’s toys and stuff; my workout accessories; my meds and daily skincare products; my tools; and pretty much all my art stuff.
It still takes some effort to keep everything in its place, but having everything in a box still looks tons better than having everything on the counter, and it’s so better for the mental health.
What sucks about having mental illness before your teenage years.
You are scared to talk about it. Don't wanna seem like an attention seeker.
Talking to a stranger who is suppose to be your therapist is stressful.
People your friends with pretending to have mental illness. Making fun of mental illness while your sitting there with over 5 disorders.
When you tell adults about stuff. They mostly dismiss it. Like "your a teenager." Like, my doctor, therapist, & psychiatrist say otherwise but like okay I guess.
Me: bitch . I have adhd and I need therapy and meds
Family member: bUt dO YoU waNt tO bE laBeLed???
Me, timidly: um.... no.....
Me, in my head: guess the internet's my only safe place for mental health huh
I want to read your experiences before being diagnosed with adhd? How did you realized? How did you feel?
I just figured out why I'm so grumpy on road trips
It's because I get overstimulated whenever I get into the car for one
All the bags in the car and it's so warm ewwww
This is one of the easiest ways to describe ADHD that I have ever found and I use it regularly.
Peter: My mind is like an internet browser. Tony: …explain? Peter: 15 tabs are open, 7 of them are frozen, and I don’t know where the music’s coming from. Tony: … Tony: Honestly, me too, kid.
if u verbally give me a set of instructions that has more than TWO steps i promise u i will not retain them. the very moment u give me a third instruction my brain is immediately cleared like a fuckin etch a sketch dude pls im begging u write it down for me bc i will NOT remember a word u said if u tell me more than two steps im begging u
I’m really laying here in bed at 3am after a brutal week at work and another belrutal day ahead of me with my body begging me to go to sleep but my stupid brain is just screaming “Fuck you! Can’t you see that I’m busy planning out the plot of my next book series and trying to guess the next plot twist of my new anime because I’ve literally never been wrong so many times about which way a story is going to go! Fuck you you can sleep when the sun comes up”
None of my usual tricks have worked and I can already tell that today is going to be just one big sensory overload🙃😭🙃😭😭😭😭
How’d you get a picture of me
Today is my first day on ADHD meds and they gave me a really small dosage for now but OH MY GOD it’s so amazing.
Like I was in class and we had to watch other people’s presentations and instead of zoning out for an hour I like, payed attention? and I just sat down during the break and just did my homework? like what? and it wasn’t even due until Friday? I didn’t think i could do that
I have a ADHD and sometimes my focus is truly nonexistencional. My mind is speeding through milions ideas that I need to put on paper, otherwise I'll forget it immediately. And when I want to go back to the work in progress, I don't have the inspiration or the strength, because I wasted all the energy into other projects.