Bbc Merlin Conversations - Tumblr Posts

Visiting Prince: I want my own wing, a personal staff and a tournament held in my honour. Oh, and I want that manservant.

Arthur: Pfff. Unbelieavable. He wants my manservant to do his chores. Can't he hire his own manservant?

Morgana: Arthur, he already has a manservant.

Arthur: What? Why would he want Merlin then?

Morgana:

Arthur:

Arthur: Oh. Ooh.

Arthur: ...and this will end in Merlin's family name being ruined.

Arthur:

Arthur: Speaking of which...Merlin? What is your family name?

Merlin: It's Merlin. Just Merlin.

Arthur: Just Merlin?

Merlin: Yes, Merlin. Like Cher.

Arthur: Merlin, just to be clear, me having a drink with a servant will be a one time thing.

Merlin: Pff, I've never actually served you.

Arthur: I will not pay for this, Merlin.

Merlin: Oh, so you're disobeying the law now? That's a turn on.

Arthur: No. I won't pay it because you will.

Merlin: That's a turn off.

Arthur: I will deduct it from your salary.

Merlin: My salary? So you're not sacking me?

Arthur: No. But you're grounded.

Merlin: Grounded? Can't you bend me over your knee and spank me like any normal adult would?

Merlin: Oh, look. Now there's a turn on again.

*after watching Uther and Catrina making heart eyes at each other*

Merlin: Should I poison the dinner, Sire?

Arthur: MERLIN!!!

Arthur: That's not for another two hours!!

Arthur: I have to get inside! *tries and fails to kick in the door*

Merlin: I bet I can get you inside.

Arthur: Go ahead.

Merlin: I want a payraise.

Arthur: Fine.

Merlin: *knocks on the door*

Morgana: Come in, it's open!

Arthur: When I am King you will be full fired.

Merlin: If you become king.

Merlin: And if you haven't fallen in love with me by then.

Arthur: What?

Arthur: *enters a room and stops dead in his tracks*

Arthur: My father was here.

Merlin: What? How would you know?

Arthur: It smells of desperation and feelings of guilt.

Merlin: Even though we're now married I want to keep working. We've always had two incomes in this family.

Arthur: Yes, love, but your income was always deducted from my income.

Merlin: It must be so nice to be rich instead of like having to develop a personality.

Arthur: Shut up, Merlin.

Merlin: Buy my silence.

Merlin: I just love meeting new people! They've got stories to tell, and-

Arthur: Can you stop being cheerful, please?

Merlin: *chatters nonstop*

Arthur: Merlin. Your mouth is talking. You might want to see to that.

Arthur: Uncle. You're not bringing any weapons.

Aggravaine: Sire. I've been there a few years back. I might have made myself a few enemies thereabouts.

Merlin: *sarcastic* Enemies? You?! No! How can it be!

Morgana: Do you know what your sin is, Uther?

Uther: Oh, hell. I'm a fan of all seven. But right now, I'm gonna have to go with wrath.

Merlin: he said he didn’t want a pet

Merlin: he said he didn’t think they were cute

Merlin: he said he they weren’t suitable to have in the castle

Merlin: he said all these things and more but now he won’t even let me play with them

Arthur, cuddling yet another dragon he has brought home with an increasingly higher voice: who’s my little firebreathing snuggle princess? who’s my little firebreathing snuggle princess?

Merlin: we have seventeen now

Arthur, hugging the dragon as it singes a nearby ancient drapery with a hiccup: Merlin, can we keep her?

Arthur: I am Prince Arthur Pendragon and this is- *gestures to Merlin*

Sophia: Lady Sophia Tír-Mòr.

Merlin: Not quite, but what an interesting guess!

Arthur: *while Merlin is in the tavern* I've been ringing my summon-an-idiot-bell for ages. And yet, have I an idiot to show for my trouble? I have not!

Morgana: Arthur, I have to tell you something. Merlin is my hostage.

Arthur: *sarcastically* Splendid. Of course he is.

Knight #1: Gwaine ate from my plate!

Knight #2: Gwaine slept in my bed!

Knight #3: Gwaine stuck my ballpoint pen in his butt!

Arthur: *softly* Yes, that is Gwaine.

Merlin: I need a petname for Arthur.

Gaius: Well, I used to call Alice my better half.

Merlin: But Arthur is not just a half. He is his a whole in every aspect!

Merlin:

Merlin: I know! I'll call Arthur my better whole!

Gaius: Merlin, noo!!