Star Wars Incorrect Quotes - Tumblr Posts
luke skywalker: Ok, so I just had a really great idea-
darth vader: No.
darth vader: i have a bad feeling about this.
luke skywalker: what do you mean?
darth vader: don’t you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you if something is going to get you in trouble?
luke skywalker: no.
darth vader: that actually explains so much
if fives and gregor ever met, their conversations would’ve looked like this
Echo: *gets a paper cut*
Rex, under his breath: Hasn't he suffered enough?
Y/N: can you watch my drink for me?
Hux: no
Y/N: *holds out hand*
Hux: *copies*
Y/N: *shoves the drink in his hand and walks away*
Hux: hey, HEY! THATS NOT FAIR IT WAS A REFLEX!
Hux: ...is this apple juice-
Obi-Wan: I remember when I was your age-
Anakin: I remember when I was your height.
Obi-Wan:
Obi-Wan: Listen here you little shit-
Obi-Wan, introducing Anakin: This is my terrible child who never listens to me, gets into trouble every five minutes and is married to Senator Amidala but try and not to mention that fact because he thinks he's doing a good job at hiding his 'secret' relationship.
Anakin : *knocking on the door at 3am* Rex! Rex! REX! Wake up!
Rex :What's the problem, sir? Are we under attack?
Anakin : I was thinking about Obi-Wan and Cody.
Rex :...
Anakin: If they get married, Cody will be my stepmother or brother-in-law?
Rex: Did you seriously wake me up for that?
Anakin :... Obi-Wan is like a father to me but he is also a brother. Does that mean Cody is going to become my stepmother and brother-in-law at the same time?
Rex :...
Anakin : Does that mean that you and I will also be brothers? Or are you going to become my uncle?
Rex :
Anakin, in a high voice, holding barbie: hey ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career! Athena, in a deep voice, holding ken: nonsense, barbie. you’re staying home and having my kids Obi Wan : what the fuck are you guys doing? Athena: playing systemic oppression
so here’s the first chapter of my obi wan kenobi fanfic. It’s probably going to be a series of one shots and incorrect quotes for a while, then later on I might think about doing a proper story. Until then, I am open to all requests with ideas of situations and funny scenes for the characters to do. Tomorrow I’ll post a description of my oc, Athena Petrov. :)
Rey and Poe just started dating
Damerey week Day 2
Pirate Au
Marriage of Convenience
“But you have heard of me” - Pirates of the Caribbean
Rex and His Beautiful Wife
and Their Beautiful Children❤️❤️
Obi-Wan to Anakin: Your lightsaber is your life! Stop losing or breaking it!
Cody arrives and gives his lightsaber back to Obi-Wan for the thousandth time: Hold on, sir.
Obi-Wan: Thank you Cody.
Anakin : ...
Anakin before doing a stupid thing: Ahsoka, don't tell Obi-Wan.
Later...
Anakin: Ahsoka!
Ahsoka : I didn't tell him anything!
What happened:
Cody : So... Rex told me that Kix told him that Echo told him that Fives told him that Commander Tano told him that General Skywalker was going to do something stupid. Again.
Obi-Wan :
Obi-Wan : Anakin, what are you doing here?
Anakin: There was a lot of sand... I hate sand and it was everywhere... Obi-Wan... The sand will come back... Can I stay with you?
Obi-Wan: *sighs* Well, you can sleep here if you don't take up all the space.
Cody : ...
Anakin: ...
Obi-Wan : ...
Anakin : Master, why is Cody here?
Cody: That's my bed, Skywalker.
Anakin: So... why is Obi-Wan here ?
Cody :
Rex: I'm not sure I understood, General.
Anakin: But it's obvious! Obi-Wan has a crush on Cody!
Rex: I'm not convinced...
Anakin : Since I've known him, he's been flirting with everything that moves and breathes!
Rex:...
Anakin : You're right, forget the part about things that breathe. Obi-Wan also flirts with droids!
Rex :...
Anakin : And Obi-Wan has never flirted with Cody so that means he has feelings for him!
Rex :...
Anakin :...
Rex : I am still not convinced...
Anakin :
Anakin : *knocking on the door at 3am* Rex! Rex! REX! Wake up!
Rex :What's the problem, sir? Are we under attack?
Anakin : I was thinking about Obi-Wan and Cody.
Rex :...
Anakin: If they get married, Cody will be my stepmother or brother-in-law?
Rex: Did you seriously wake me up for that?
Anakin :... Obi-Wan is like a father to me but he is also a brother. Does that mean Cody is going to become my stepmother and brother-in-law at the same time?
Rex :...
Anakin : Does that mean that you and I will also be brothers? Or are you going to become my uncle?
Rex :
Anakin returns to Coruscant a week later than he does in ROTS because he was injured and had to be hospitalized on another planet.
Anakin: Padme, I'm back!
Padme : Ani! I'm glad to see you!
Anakin : Did you have any problems while I wasn't there?
Padme : ...
Anakin : Padme?
Padme : I was pregnant.
Anakin: What?!
Padme : You're a dad.
Anakin : WHAT??!!
Padme : Luke and Leia sleep so don't make too much noise if you go to see them.
Anakin: They are TWO ???!!!
Anakin :
Cody : *Waking up at 3am because a comlink rings* ... Yes?
Anakin :... Cody?
Cody: General Skywalker? Is there a problem?
Anakin: No...
Cody: You need me for something?
Anakin : No...
Cody: So why did you call me at 3am?
Anakin: I didn't. Why did you respond to Obi-Wan's comlink?
Cody : What...?
Anakin :... Is Obi-Wan with you? At 3am? What does that mean?!
Cody : That's not what you think, sir! We were... He was...
Anakin : Obi-Wan, you're just a stupid hypocrite!
Obi-Wan: *wakes up because of the noise * What?
Cody : We can explain!
Anakin: Obi-Wan! The last time I asked Rex to work at this time to help me with the paperwork, you berated me for hours! But you're doing the same thing with Cody!
Obi-Wan : *always half asleep* Paperwork? Where?
Cody : Paperwork! We are guilty! We were working. Nothing else. You are absolutely right! *laughs nervously*