Gogol - Tumblr Posts
Fyodor, Nikolai, WTF??
I just was bored and I made this. (Who the fuck know that girl, I just drew her from imagination.)
Eeehhhh... 🤦♀️🤷♀️
finlot.
😍😍 💐💐💐
“ … За Гоголем остается заслуга, что он первый дал русской литературе решительное стремление к содержанию, и притом стремление в столь плодотворном направлении, как критическое“ Н. Г. Чернышевский ( Очерки гоголевского периода русской литературы)
𝐅𝐲𝐨𝐝𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞, 𝐬𝐨 𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠
Fyodor can still feel things, no matter how much he tries to hide it. We know where he channels his negative emotions (to sinners). But where do the positive ones go? Well, he dedicates them to God.
God is a time capsule for all the positive feelings that are still left inside Fyodor. They're too vulnerable, too tender, too childish to share them with humans. People will only trample over them and leave him empty.
But Dostoevsky still can't part with his sentiments. They give his heart a little jolt so it can keep living a little longer. So where can he direct them?
God is left as his only safe space for that.
Fyodor treats the concept of God like a coffer, where he can store his dreams from the earlier days. All of his hopes, aspirations, fantasies are better be locked inside the God's chest. Since God is the only one occupying Fyodor's brain, he'll keep them safe.
Devine being became a target for Fyodor's affection because He can't reject or hurt Dostoevsky in any meaningful way. It's left up to Fyodor's mind to imagine God as he likes. And so he does it.
God becomes not only a symbol to thrive for, but also a companion that helps him to cope with the loneliness.
God accepts all the Fyodor's needs humanity haven't fulfilled. His agonizing idealism, his need for deep understanding of his soul and a connection that makes him feel at home.
Surely, during the centuries of Fyodor's life, he came close to forming a bond with people at least a few times. But the process of separation was so painful, Dostoy decided it wasn't worth it anyway.
His failure to organically morn the end of his relations led to his fatal inability to reattach once again. Fyodor mistrusts new people in his life: he compartmentalizes them, puts on labels, and tries to keep every interaction under control.
The only one who can relate to this mindset is Bram, but even he is able to break away from it because of Aya. Stoker risks taking interest in the girl and then sacrifices his life for her. Now Bram's time is no longer frozen in place, he's moving forward, his character progresses.
But Fyodor is too overwhelmed with his feelings and memories that have never healed. He probably thinks that even a small bit of a emotional pain will break him entirely. So even if someone comes to Dostoevsky, waving a friendship flag in the air, Fyodor will shut down to keep them away.
This is what happened with Gogol. Nikolai wanted to be friends with Fyodor. But Dostoy never showed him any of his deeper emotions. By hiding all personal information, Dos-kun maintained a distance between himself and a jester. So the later couldn't reach out to and comfort Fyodor even if he wanted.
Of course, there is always a chance that Gogol would use Dostoevsky's feelings against him. And Fyodor also probably thought about that, so he cut off that option entirely. Sadly, we'd never see where their connection could lead, if Dostoevsky chose to share with Nikolai his everything. Maybe, it would lead to an even bigger disaster, but perhaps they would be able to find some solace in each other.
Now Fyodor is too hurt to open up his soul. All the scars on it had fused into an armor, protecting him from caring about others. Dostoevsky's soul became a shell, impenetrable from the outside. He made sure it would never change. His fortress. His prison. His mind.
Trapped inside of it, Dostoevsky still craved for someone to be there for him. Fyodor wanted a friend with whom he could converse without lying. He wanted a family. Maybe, he even wanted a lover.
Therefore, God was cast in all the roles that had been left vacant in Fyodor's life. And of course, Devine Being could fulfill them better than anyone. At least, from the Dostoy's perspective, his life was easier this way.
In Fyodor's story, God is a star of every relationship he still has.
God is almost like a friend, but he won't argue back or abandon him in pain. He won't make Fyodor feel inadequate by disagreeing with his perspective.
God is like a family, but he loves Fyodor unconditionally or at least His “conditions” are kinder than human ones. They're much more bearable than the rules Dostoevsky had to abide by when he was a child.
God is like a lover, but his love isn't physically “sinful” (whatever sexuality Fyodor has, it's very morphed and repressed). Devine being won't be put off by Fyodor's appearance and won't leave once He sees who Fyodor truly is.
God is like a teacher, but he doesn't have a hidden agenda and actually wants Fyodor to be better. God knows indefinitely more than Fyodor, so He can always share something new from His well of knowledge.
And of course, God will never change, die or choose someone else. He is always there.
It feels safe for Fyodor to love and admire someone who is so perfect.
And well, God can't disappoint.
Nikolai talks non-stop, but Fydor is into it (?)
Fyodor: Impressive. Sometimes, I can't read your thoughts at all.
Nikolai: That's because I don't think before I speak! >:D
Fyodor: That makes sense. I can't pick up on what's not there.
Nikolai: Yes! Speaking on impulse is the only way I can silence my brain. Anyway, about your plan…
Fyodor: (I'll let him talk. Maybe, it'll help him quite down his internal monologue)
𝐍𝐢𝐤𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐢 𝐆𝐨𝐠𝐨𝐥 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧: 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬, 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐬
You know how cats can purr, when they enjoy stuff, but also when they need to sooth their physical suffering? Well, Gogol is the same with smiles. The more pain Nikolai feels, the more “smiley” he gets, until the agony becomes too unbearable and he breaks.
Maybe, Gogol has some subconscious belief that if he keeps smiling, things will turn out to be alright? Or, perhaps, he doesn't want to give another person the satisfaction of seeing his anguish. It all comes down to Nikolai wanting to prove to himself that he can enjoy anything, any kind of pain. That nothing is impossible for him.
Gogol even smiled after hearing that Dostoevsky was going to kill him. The only time he couldn't do it anymore was when he thought Fyodor was gone. It was the only instance, when Nikolai forgot how to do anything: move, laugh, speak or breath.
The mask of a clown was gone and there was nothing underneath, but a frightened kid, watching his friend being killed.
𝐍𝐢𝐤𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐢'𝐬 𝐬𝐚𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐞
Will Kolya be happy to give his body to Fyodor? Not as an act of revenge against morality. But as a present from one friend to another.
Before that, Gogol didn't have anything Fyodor could appreciate. Neither his philosophical jokes nor whimsical emotions ever touched Fyodor in a way he wanted.
But now, Kolya has something Fyodor can grow to like. Nikolai's body with no soul inside. A new vessel ready to go! This is something his dearest friend will enjoy.
Dostoevsky might even thank him for disappearing! Isn't it amazing, indeed? Now Gogol won't have to fear his friend dying and leaving him behind. It's delightful, it makes Kolya want to fly!
𝐆𝐨𝐠𝐨𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧
Nikolai had put so much effort into creating his monstrous façade. All the jesting, laughing, toying with the pain of others. He tried so hard to look like a “monstrous person with nothing inside”. But in the end he didn't want to be remembered as such.
Gogol still wanted to let the world know that he wasn't a monster. During his makeshift penance to Atsushi he tried to humanize himself by telling about the guilt and remorse he felt. Nikolai even confessed to the Agency that he admired the justice they fought for. He said: the light they emitted drawn him in.
Nikolai couldn't allow himself to be viewed as just another criminal. He wanted to be remembered. He wanted to make people care.
For that, Gogol gauged out his soul and presented it to the audience.
He wanted to be seen, even at the very last moment.
I made this one after episode 11 haha
bsd modern/uni au where the jail arc is all the meursault girlies going to a jailbreak-themed escape room for Fyodor’s birthday but they’re all drunk asf (except Sigma, who’s the designated driver) and. Dazai gets in and immediately lays down on the ground and accepts death but he’s so bored he starts solving the puzzles from the floor anyway and Nikolai is climbing the walls trying to see if the ceiling panels open and Chuuya is trying to brute-force various doors and safes open and poor Sigma is trying so hard to solve it and get out and Fyodor is waging psychological war with the person watching them over the cameras but he scares them away and starts trying to psychologically fight Dazai instead and at this point the worker assigned to them has just. left so they’re stuck in this room with Chuuya and Sigma’s crumbling sanity for like. three hours. in the end they get out bcuz Dazai solved the code for the door without even doing the rest of the room. anyways just think about it
in the end when Dazai solves the code he doesn’t even get up he just. announces it to the room and Sigma immediately makes a break for it and Chuuya does too but he comes back once he realizes Dazai isn’t moving and he drags him out himself and Fyodor’s just like. oh. it’s over already? and also Nikolai escaped into the air ducts like half an hour ago and Sigma has to go back in to look for him after he remembers that he’s the designated driver and he can’t just. leave them. so in the end they have to call the fire department at like one in the morning to remove this clown from the ceiling vents and. the place has been closed for two hours but the fire department has to call up an extremely disgruntled employee (it’s Ango) to find out what happened and in the end they all get banned for life from the escape room place.
bsd modern/uni au where the jail arc is all the meursault girlies going to a jailbreak-themed escape room for Fyodor’s birthday but they’re all drunk asf (except Sigma, who’s the designated driver) and. Dazai gets in and immediately lays down on the ground and accepts death but he’s so bored he starts solving the puzzles from the floor anyway and Nikolai is climbing the walls trying to see if the ceiling panels open and Chuuya is trying to brute-force various doors and safes open and poor Sigma is trying so hard to solve it and get out and Fyodor is waging psychological war with the person watching them over the cameras but he scares them away and starts trying to psychologically fight Dazai instead and at this point the worker assigned to them has just. left so they’re stuck in this room with Chuuya and Sigma’s crumbling sanity for like. three hours. in the end they get out bcuz Dazai solved the code for the door without even doing the rest of the room. anyways just think about it
Não é muita sabedoria dizer palavras de censura; a grande sabedoria é dizer palavras que, sem tocar na desgraça do homem, incentivam-no e dão ânimo a seu espírito, tal como esporas animam o espírito de um cavalo que se refrescou numa fonte.
Nikolai Gógol
The Path of Vengeance
“If you lock this enchanted ring around the Warlock’s neck, he will become mortal, but be warned. Vengeance is for sinners and the lord will punish you with the power of the Trinity!
Turn back now, before it’s too late.” The old witch screeched, her lazy eye could barely see, but even then she was able to stare at them with wide horror as she held the ring towards them, daring them to take it not.
Elizabeth only spared her sister one look and seeing the same determination, the anger in her brown eyes, she took the ring from the old witch and no sister did once look back.
They had a Warlock to kill.
