High Headcanons - Tumblr Posts

Would Geralt be great at like, catching flies? Because he had Witcher reflexes and whatnot? Like imagine walking with roach on day, and (poor girl) has horse flies and Geralt just single handingly taking out all the horse flies?

I can just see both him and Jaskier sitting in a tavern eating after a bad hunt and because some taverns I would imagine are humid and hot do to all the bodies inside and day light, there would be flies right?

Well Jaskier is thing to talk but this godforsaken fly keeps bugging between them, and listen buddy both of them are annoyed with it. While Jaksier is going off about being in a mood, Geralt like moves at neck break speed and the buzzing around them stops, and so does Jaskier and he’s just staring at Geralt’s hand that’s like frozen between them in a tight fits, and then Geralt moves his hand under the table and shakes it off.

Jaskier’s like “okay what the fuck just happened” and Geralt shrugs and continues to eat his stew like “it was annoying me so I got rid of it” and Jaskier’s just sitting there, mouth wide fuckin open like holy shit and then Geralt comments about attracting flies with his mouth or somethin

Just me? Because I think that’s funny as fuck

I spend my days reading lots of fics of Jaskier and Geralt, and some of my favoruites are where one of them is cursed, like to an animal or tiny or back into a child, y’know? And it’s like, this is great trust me, but what about the opposite happening???

Like instead of turning into a child, Jaskier turns into an old man because only moments before a sneaky mage attacks the two, he’s complaining about his back hurting, and after the spell is cast and the mage is down, Geralt turns to see this old wrinkled man where Jaskier was. Geralt has seen a lot so he’s pretty confident this frail old guy is Jaskier, but when he tries to ask, Jaskier cups his ear and yells “What??? I can’t hear you, speak louder” in that iconic old person voice and Geralt just feels it deep in his bones that this is gonna be a long trip.

Or instead of turning tiny, Geralt finally beats down this annoying little mage who totally hit Jaskier “by accident” and it only makes itself known after the mage is dealt with, or rather Jaskier has made himself know because he grows so big that he’s like cramped in the mages tiny house, and Geralt looks up at him and Jaskier is trying not to break the beams holding the poor cottage together.

I’d just like to think about old Jaskier telling made up stories and being old and slow with a pack of sass cause he’s wise and about how giant Jaskier is totally taller than some trees and is nervous around people and roach because he doesn’t want to step on them accidentally.

Okay this is a weird thought, but like. Do you think Geralt can like speak backwards? Hear me out okay, just listen

He’s been around for a long time, right? Sure when we meet him he doesn’t talk that much but he still has a past man, a mans gotta know language in order to speak to people. I’m someone who likes to think Geralt, and the rest of the Witcher’s, are really educated. Not only monster nerds, but also smooth with words when they wanna be y’know?

I can’t help but think that Geralt and Eskel totally learn to speak backwards. I don’t know why, but I honestly think it would be hella cool.

Jaskier like comes along and starts traveling with Geralt and maybe they go to Oxenfurt and they drink and have a good time and Geralt is taking a drink of his ale and is feeling a bit of a buzz when Jaskier asks “so is there anything you can do other than witchery stuff” and Geralt takes a moment to think before saying something backwards and Jaskier. just. stares.

Huh?? Geralt like smiles a little and hides it behind his ale while Jaskier just takes a moment, because what the fuck, Geralt. What was that.

I’m playing dream daddy and I just got to the part where your dad argues with another dad to show who has the top kid, and I just gotta say, I’m digging the idea of Geralt shaping off Ciri with proud dad vibes.

I know in their universe, they really can’t just show Ciri off because uh. well, you get my point, but I really can’t get it out of my head that maybe one day while traveling, Jaskier and Ciri pull Geralt and roach over to a field right outside of town, other kids are picking flowers and are pretty scattered out, and they all are picking flowers. Ciri only brought Jaskier along for extra hands. Geralt watches as the two scout for nice flowers, enjoying his time. “Is that your kid?”

Geralt’s never been scared before, and knew the person was there, but it startled him when the man pointed at Ciri, a wanted child. Geralt straightened up and looked at the man. He was tiny, old and frail, nowhere near a Knight. He’s hunched over a little with a balding head and long white beard. The more shocking thing about him is he was completely calm.

“I remember when I first had my daughter,” he begins, and Geralt can’t help but feel... curious in a way. No, he doesn’t like sitting through stories, but if someone were on the outside of the village looking them, it really just looked like the man was talking to himself. “She was the light of my life, y’know. Always wanted a son, but after seeing her, I knew she was all I needed. Hah, now I got a grandchild.”

Geralt looks down at the mans hands that now cross over his chest and raises both eyebrows. He didn’t know Ciri when she was little, but connecting with her over the time they had together? He turns and faces the two who have began to count their flowers.

The old man stands there in silence for a moment more before leaning a little closer. “Y’know, my daughter has more flowers than yours.” Geralt pauses, before looking at the old man, who is oddly wearing the face of smug. Geralt squints slightly at the old man, before turning to Ciri and Jaskier and carefully counting. Why was he doing this? He doesn’t know ask someone else. “And she’s also good with not dropping all the flowers.”

It doesn’t help that while geralt was counting, Ciri totally drops one and doesn’t notice. Okay old man, if this is how it’s gonna be. He brings roach to the side, who has happily been feasting like a king (yeah I know she’s a ladie), he walks over to Ciri and Jaskier, carefully plucking flowers on the way. He looked for the best ones, no bent no broken flower for his surprise daughter. He looks up at the two as they stare at him with wide, happy eyes and straightens up. “With six pairs of hands, we should get even more than with just four.”

Later after Geralt, Jaskier and Ciri did he realize that maybe that old man was trying to get them closer or whatever.

So I’m a big fan of transformers, the movies are amazing, the action is killer, I hyper-fixate every time I watch the movies.

So I brought you all hear for an au idea, Transformers and the Witcher. At first? I thought of Optimus Prime being like Vesemir, and the rest like the wolves. Be hella cool. But hear me out okay?

Geralt is the guy who contacts the first Atuobots, and her name is Roach. I do want to stick to Optimus Prime being like Vesemir because I think that would be really cool.

Maybe some backstory is Geralt, Eskel and Lambert run a car shop, all three end up meeting Roach. We also get to meet Scorpion who takes Eskel’s side, and then Storm, who’s stubborn enough to take Lambert.

I do want Yennefer, Ciri and Jaskier to be there. Yennefer is a federal Agent who works with the Autobots, getting top secret files to the next big guy, her and Geralt had a fling a while back but decided to keep it friendly. Ciri is Geralt’s goddaughter, who stays with Geralt, Eskel and Lambert along with Roach, Scorpian and Storm, trust me they all swore to keep that kid safe no mater what. Jaskier? Jaskier is Yennefer’s partner. New and young, good with words and good with getting them into situations Yennefer wants.

Jaskier’s first meeting with Geralt, his brothers and the transformers, goes pleasently well. Scorpian loves him, he’s funny, Storm doesn’t like him and Roach doesn’t seem to care. What they don’t know, and soon figure out, is that Jaskier first found Prime and that even though Prime drives mostly himself, he has a soft spot for Jaskier. It’s funny because when they first meet, Jaskier pats the hood and smiles, saying “he likes to be called Vesemir” Geralt, Eskel and Lambert have a new appreciation towards Jaksier, the cars opinions doesn’t change but Roach learns to warm up to him.

During this time, Jaskier and Geralt warm up to each other nicely ;) dates and possibly a little more, but they are absolutely badass working together with the Autobots. I think it’s a silly but cute idea, and I’m absolutely going to forever think about this idea.

Along with the other au’s and headcanons I talk about on here, Wolf Geralt is pretty up there, or really animal transformations but that’s for another day. What I’m kinda gonna go off is this series which is about Geralt getting cursed and when his medallion comes off he becomes a wolf, very lovely series please go check it out and hand out kudos to the writer.

Anyways, my headcanons tonight are about wolf Geralt and how hilarious it would be. I always see funny dog videos uhhh everywhere, and I love to think like “that’s him. That’s Geralt as a wolf” because it’s hilarious and only him as a brooding man would do that in a wolf form.

Here, picture Jaskier and Geralt walking, both on either side of roach when they pass a field that’s open, and Geralt stops roach and Jaskier stops a few steps ahead because uhh, why would Geralt stop? He looks back to see the Witcher staring at the field with determination before whipping around and staring him dead in the eye. Jaskier questions before being handed a medallion and soon seeing this giant white wolf zoom into the field. The field is long enough so the wolf has to hop, and Jaskier is laughing and watching as Geralt has his fun.

Or like Wolf Geralt getting the zoomies? It takes place mostly at Kaer Morhen, where Geralt can relax and his brothers actually play with him in this wolf form. Him and Lambert are playing around, rolling around on each other before Geralt hops up and shoots off. Lambert is laughing hard he’s breathless, Eskel and Jaskier just walked in and in question before they see the White Wolf barreling his way through the hallway only to snap back around and race off. Jaskier starts to laugh and Eskel totally cheers him on which only makes him last longer. (Don’t even get me started on the poop zoomies)

Now I have a dog of my own, he’s adorable but he can be sassy as hell, idk if other dogs do this, but mine will give me serious side eye action and when laying out, will kick his back legs on whoever they land on, and it’s funny to think of Geralt doing that too. Him stretching out in the giant pile they all made by a fire one night, and his back legs end up on Jaskier and while stretching out he just kicks the shit out of Jaskier who’s trying to sleep and when Jaskier tries to stop, he earns a groan from the wolf and serious side eye business. Jaskier says he totally stinks of attitude and puppy breath but gets kicked again.

One last one for the road, but the dogs (mainly huskeys) who yell and don’t really bark? Geralt. Totally. When Jaskier is trying to get onto Geralt for spilling something zooming around, Geralt starts to yell, and doesn’t stop. Everyone hates it, because he’s loud and knows it. But they totally get him back for it. See, when it first started, Eskel had enough and let out one of the fake howls you do to get a puppy to do that cute “awoooo” sound, and it gets Geralt to stop and do the head tilt before immediately joining in. Eskel, Lambert, Jaskier and Vesemir find it funny as hell, but Geralt says he hates it because he can’t really control it.

I was trying to sweeten this piece by explains my thought process first, but I thought I should just be honest with you guys. I think Jaskier is a giant Witcher nerd.

Let me explain why I think so, and it’s because that young, fresh pubescent boy who named himself Jaskier looked at this spooky and scary Witcher and said you. you are the chosen one. And followed that rat around for what, twenty something years? Like I understand some people can pick up something that’s old and dusty and just get on with it, but I also think that you should have some knowledge of what you’re getting into.

Jaskier sees Geralt sitting in the bar and Its immediate that he knows this man is a Witcher. He tries getting the man to talk to him, to maybe say he’s a Witcher but when that doesn’t work, he points it out and well, the guy doesn’t disagree.

Explaining more of my point, is that Witchers (mainly Geralt) were hated, because of how they did things, they were mutated, and Geralt with the blaviken thing, so why does this tiny boy come up to him and then stick to him like glue, y’know? Jaskier totally did his research, and totally knew what Witchers were. He knew almost (<-key word) exactly what he was getting into when he stuck to Geralt, and after the Elven accident, he has a better understand of what’s gonna go down with his life next to this man, and fixes some of his beliefs on Witchers.

I think it’s also a reason why he wants to make Geralt famous, because when he first studied them, maybe (most) facts were wrong about Witchers, so he wants people to understand them better than what they had before. All in all, I think Jaskier knows exactly who Geralt is, has been trying to reach out to the other Witchers that roam the rock, and is actually pretty excited about learning more about Witchers.

I want to make more headcanons for Eskel because uhh he’s my favourite out of the bunch. Like, all the other characters are amazing, but look at Eskel, such a sweet handsome man.

Anyways, I come and bring headcanons that I’ve thought about for him, and the first I wanna discuss is that he knows piano. Do I know if pianos exist in the Witcher universe? No. Does that stop me? Of course not. Piano is difficult at first to learn but I think since he had a few years on his plate, might as well make it interesting. I’d like to think that he thinks Piano is a very nice sound, and is attracted to when it’s being played. No one thinks such a roughed up looking Witcher would plop down and become Beethoven yet here we are. I’d also like to think that after Jaskier finds this out, he writes music for Eskel, and shows him the music. Maybe with little sight reading, Eskel can play the piece within just a few hours of having the sheet music, and it totally makes Jaskier cry, and perhaps they play together as lute and piano.

As someone who doesn’t like the rain (ahem me), I think he’s one of the few that really like it, and I mean really likes it. A storm is rolling in and Geralt and Jaskier happen to be in the same village Eskel is in, they get a room all together for the night, and while sleeping, Jaskier wakes up from nothing and notices it’s raining. From one human to another, he doesn’t like it, the rain gives him a cold, but when he realizes Eskel isn’t in the room and indeed outside just sitting in the rain, he isn’t much bothered by it and wraps a blanket tight around himself. He’ll join Eskel, as long as there’s something to stand under so he doesn’t get rained on, but from what he’s gathered, when it rains Eskel sits and soaks. Long after their little nights sitting in the rain, Eskel tells Jaskier the rain washes out the bad in his head, drenching the words and thoughts permanently carved into him. He feels at peace, and Jaskier respects that.

Last, but not least, I think his favourite season is autumn. Like he gets this kind of childish joy when he knows autumn is coming. He doesn’t know why, but he loves it. He loved the leafs changing colours, the cool breezes on rather sunny days, the closer autumn is the more he gets excited and meets up with another Witcher. Maybe he says it’s because of the crunching leafs under him when he walks, or maybe he says it’s because it’s closer to winter and closer to when he can go to his home in the mountains and spend time with his not-so-family family, or maybe it’s Maybelline, that’s up for you to decide.

If anyone’s got anymore ideas, feel free to add. I love this man, he deserves nice things.

I wanna talk more about wolf Geralt because honestly? He’s been on my mind lately. These are just more random things I’ve been thinking about so I hope you guys like.

Geralt has a favourite blanket. This blanket isn’t his own furs he has in his nice comfortable room, nuh uh, this blanket is from Lambert’s room. When Geralt is in his wolf form, this man trots his way to Lambert’s room and if the young Witcher isn’t in his room, Geralt takes the pleasure of rubbing and rolling on the blanket. If Lambert is in his room, Gearlt hops onto the bed, and with lightening speed, grabs the blanket between his teeth and fucking guns it. Gearlt will and has played tug of war with Lambert because it’s his fuckin blanket, Geralt give it back— if Lambert let’s Gearlt win, maybe after a day of intense training or running the walls of the keep, Gearlt sets it in the large living area and by the fire, and will rub and roll on it with his smug wolf face.

Another thing is Geralt doesn’t mind goats while human, because he isn’t ground level with them, but as a wolf he cannot stand them for more than a few minutes. Eskel doesn’t let him near most of his goats he’s collected because a) he still doesn’t know if Geralt has more wolf like instincts when it comes to prey animals and b) his goats would be scared of Geralt anyways. But, Lil’ Bleater isn’t scared of Gearlt, either the goat knows it’s him or the goat thinks it owns Kaer Morhen. Lil’ Bleater will hop around Geralt, hop on him only to bounce off of him, bleep at him and just do everything around Geralt and he hates it. The goat doesn’t back off from the growls too much, so Geralt has given to barking at the goat, who will freeze up, fall over, and then run off and hide normally wherever Eskel is. Idk, I just thought this was kind of a funny idea, like if Geralt was being annoying, Eskel would bust out Lil’ Bleater and he’d get a taste of his own medicine.

Another bit, is when Lambert or Vesemir are in the kitchen preparing food, wolf Geralt comes into the kitchen area and instead of begging, he’ll just watch. He doesn’t sit in the walk way though, too many times hashis poor tail been stepped on, so he’ll sit behind the counter top they use to cut the meat on. Geralt is just big and tall enough for just his eyes to peek over the top of the counter, and watch. Jaskier once walked in on the scene and still teased him about it to this day, Eskel likes to give him small strips of meat if he catches him, but he doesn’t bag around Vesemir or Lambert, he knows better. Geralt admits sometime later he just likes to watch them work, it’s very hypnotizing.

Okay okay, last one. I won’t go too much into this one, but have you seen those dogs who hold things in their mouths and do the little happy skipping with their feet? Look me in the eyes and tell me that’s not Geralt. I do understand that he’s not always like that, but maybe if Jaskier is sad or someone gives him how own steak, he totally does his little happy dance. Lambert calls it tapping toes, Eskel can’t stop laughing, and Jaskier will dance with him. Vesemir is just amused he’s so expressive when in this form.

I’m kind of obsessed with the idea that Jaskier makes his own paper and makes his own books from scratch. You know the really aesthetic looking tiktoks or how to tutorials on making a book? Yeah, that’s Jaskier.

Like I can see him having a small bucket that’s long enough filled with river water and paper he’s cut up and let soak, and running a screen through and letting the pages dry over night by their camp fire.

Or him sewing the pages together and creating the spine and covers. I’m not too educated on the process, so I’m sorry if I get everything wrong or if I don’t add to much detail onto the idea, but I’d like to hear everyone else’s ideas to this.

Another is, I think Geralt would absolutely love watching Jaskier do all this. Very relaxing.

Would the wolf Witchers have different areas they get sensory overloads? Like, does that make sense? Their senses are enhance to be more powerful so certain things would be more intense for the others, let me explain how I’m thinking this.

I want to start with Geralt, because he’s the first I can think of. Honestly? I think his sense of smell is incredibly strong. Even though he has extra mutations and stuff and it is probably different, I think his sense of smell is overpowering even for him. It could be used for hunting and tracking down missing pets or people, but I also think he just smells so much when stepping into a village or town, and it’s kind of too much? First meeting Jaskier, I think he recoiled from him because it was just so intense and made his nose burn, but after few words and many reactions, I think Jaskier settles down the fragrance and goes for something that is so settle to him it’s not even there but Geralt kinda really enjoys it? Sure he still doesn’t like to enter town most of the time because of the disgusting smells, but maybe Jaskier gives him a small cloth with the nice smell.

I don’t think much on Lambert just because I kinda don’t relate to his humour or personality but I’m learning to open up about him, and I like the headcanon people have of him cooking, and being excellent at it. I think his sensitive sense is taste. A lot of things just don’t sit with him, it tastes disgusting. Watching mothers lick a cloth to wipe dirt from their child’s face makes him feel creepy’s and crawly’s, he hates it. Maybe he doesn’t eat much of other peoples cooking because of it, but when he makes it, he knows what to do with it and it doesn’t effect him as bad. Maybe it’s more of a texture thing the longer I think of it. I’d also like to think that he’s the only one who cooks in Kaer Morhen because the other wolfs understand it, and his cooking is the best.

I thought hard and long on Eskel but I think I wanna go with hearing. I wouldn’t say it’s worse or better than the other Witchers, it’s just the first to really really get to him. Towns and villages are hard for him at times because the blacksmith working can be too much, town folk talking can be too much, farm animals and so on. Maybe around Kaer Morhen, if a loud creature is out around the property of the Keep, he’ll hunch his shoulders up and cover his ears, but outside the Keep I think maybe he has some wax plugs he puts in. If those don’t work well, which I’m thinking they don’t most of the time, he probably sits with his hands overs his ears for a while, gather himself. I think maybe Geralt, Jaskier and Vesemir give him books from time to time just to settle in silence, focus on the words and fuzz everything out.

Finally, I wanna get to Vesemir himself. Not gonna lie, touch. I don’t think this man likes any kind of touch he doesn’t allow or hasn’t done it first. As in like, if he doesn’t hold his hand out for a handshake, don’t grab his hand for him and shake it. He hates it. Don’t pat him on the shoulder, don’t touch his elbow, no hugs unless he goes for it first. I think the pups know this, but when he firsts meets Jaskier, I think he would get stressed out completely cause this man is all talk and touch. With the pups instructions not to, Jaskier wouldn’t do it anymore of course, but Vesemir was very put off with Jaskier at first. I’d also like to bring up the idea that maybe Vesemir just always wears gloves, could be his armour gauntlets or just a tight pair of leather gloves, makes him feel like he’s not touching anything, only the glove is. As a person who is sensitive to touching most times, I get the stress of it and I think the gloves would be, not only interesting, but a weight lifting. You aren’t touching it, the glove is.

I’ve made some more wolf geralt headcanons, would you like some wolf geralt headcanons? Here, have some wolf geralt headcanons you poor children.

I do think someone gives him a toy. I don’t think it’s from one of his brothers or Jaskier, but it’s from a little girl who was taught that he was the white wolf, not the butcher and wanted to give him something so he’s protected too. Him as normal adores the fuck out of the toy, but his wolf form has an obsession with it. The first time the wolf brothers see it, Geralt has been whining up a storm, shifting from side to side with nervousness while Jaskier gets the toy. If the toy isn’t by his side most of the winter, everyone’s going to hear him whine until it’s found.

Geralt blends in really well with the snow, so when it’s just beginning to snow, him, Eskel and Lambert race outside to play hide n seek. Geralt does it because it’s fun and tires him out, for Eskel and Lambert it helps with their hunting skills, mostly like smell and sight. It’s really funny to see Geralt lay down completely to try and camouflage in the snow, with his golden eyes shining so bright.

Geralt nannies the fuck out of Ciri when she comes along. She is now apart of the pack, she must be protected!! He followed her around everywhere, being there for support if she needed to lean on something, pulling her out of the way when the other wolves, +bard, are trying to get things done. If they’re somewhere and Geralt has a sudden feeling of danger, he’ll do everything is wolf self can to get Ciri out of there and safely somewhere else. Ciri is also the only one who can bribe Geralt into doing tricks.

If he’s tired after a long day of training, he’ll shift into his wolf form sometimes, and wherever he is at whatever time, he’s going to lay down and stay there. Jaskier jokes about him being a lap wolf, it’s all fun n games until Geralt turns into this huge fluffy white wolf and crushes your legs with pure hunting muscles. Eskel only likes it’s when he’s had a bad night, Geralt always sticks with him after a bad night. He’s with Lambert most of the nights, poor baby wolf so sensitive to the cold keep. When he’s not with either of them, he’s with Jaskier laying his head on his stomach and Jaskier petting his head. He sings for him and massages his ears, and in return Geralt keeps Jaskier warm and licks his face when Jaskier is joking with him.

Last one, but when Geralt gets excited over something, his tail wags like no tomorrow and doesn’t care what he’s hitting with it. If it’s a body part, better hope it can stand it. But if it’s a hard object, like a door or a counter corner and it has that steady beat to it, Jaskier totally makes up a song on the spot to the beat of Geralt’s tail.

I hope that was enjoyable, if you want to add anything I’d love to see it!!

The wolf boys best sleeping positions cause I’m tired.

Lambert loves to be cuddles from behind, little spoon this one is. When him and the other wolf ding dongs cuddle together in front of the fire during winter he makes sure to get the edge by the fire because Eskel n Geralt like to cuddle together sometimes, plus it feels like he’s protected by the other two (which he will never ever tell them). When Jaskier comes along, they love to cuddle together and hold one another. If Jaskier wakes up one night to pee, Lamber will sleepily cling to him to try and get him back down. In the morning he won’t admit it, but if another one saw him cling, he owns up to it proudly.

Eskel totally spreads all out, maximum comfort is in star fish position. I also bet this man kicks in his sleep. He doesn’t mean to, but if ones too close and he can’t spread out, better be prepared to be shoved. Now he if he’s cuddling someone before he falls asleep, he won’t spread out like normal and will sleep like the mountain he is. I bet he also likes to squeeze between Lambert and Geralt, the middle is always the warmest to him.

Geralt, I bet likes to sleep on his back, and who ever cuddles into his sides will be locked into cuddling with him. Normally when cuddling, either by the fire or on his huge ass bed, you’ll find him asleep on his back with Jaskier n Eskel cuddling against his sides, protected by his arms. If Lambert joins, Jaskier likes to take Geralt’s chest.

I can’t forget Vesemir, just because he’s old ain’t mean he likes a good nap with his pups. I bet you’d find him on his own bed, which would probably be just a wee bit smaller than the other boys, curled up and tuckered out after a hunt for winters food, with the boys cuddled and surrounding him just like how he watches over the wolf boys when they lay out under the hearth.

not sure if you also follow marvel, but seeing as MCU *also* has a conjunction event, what would happen if the Witchers wound up on their earth (or anywhere else in the MCU for that matter?)

This is a good question!! Ngl, when I first saw this, I thought of Yennefer meeting Black Widow and kinda got really excited about that idea, but also Yen meeting Scarlet Witch is something too.

My mind wonders to Lambert second, and no I don’t really understand yet how his character is/works, like his personality, so not much comes to mind instead or maybe Rocket, or Loki. I personally feel like he’d make good jokes with Rocket, and I’m not totally 100% sure why Loki??? It’s probably because I kinda see his relationship with Geralt seem like how Thor and Loki are? oddly?? Like one of them is totally furious kitty, while the other one is like “he’s adopted guys”.

Along with Thor, Geralt also likes to talk to Hawkeye, purely because I once heard Geralt likes crossbows, he may also like Captain America because wasn’t he like, pumped with a super-solider serum ??? and then brought to a strange modern arc in the future at sometime ??? they probably help each other out with adjusting, also Steve saying Geralt isn’t a monster and helping him is kinda really soft to think about.

oh buddy do I have Eskel hc’s for you, I totally want to think he gets along well with Doctor Strange, magic???? it’s not realistic, because poor boy couldn’t comprehend, but this is fiction. I also bet he likes Bucky, cause he likes his hair (and cool arm).

okay, Jaskier. My first thought was Spiderman? but you gotta remember Jaskier isn’t young no more, he’s like 40, spidy is baby. it is a cool idea though. So I kept thinking, and I like the idea of him and Ironman getting along, both having a sharp tongue, I bet they can talk and talk for hours.

for Ciri, I really like her and Captain Marvel to get along, oh my gosh, I think it’s a click right at the beginning. Ciri does get fly rides, and!! I also think she’d get along with The Hulk, she’s curious, he’s willing to answer questions.

for Vesemir? I totally think he sits back with Odin, Vesemir is just surprised to see this. I do think they’d do old people things together. 

Thank you for smiting!! I hope this satisfies you!! If you want to add more, or debunk ideas, I’d love to hear.

So like am I one of the few who thinks of Eskel as the older sibling kind?👀 Like he’s got so much big brother energy it’s so crazy, let me tell you about the things I’ve thought of for it.

Geralt’s been feeling kind of down during the winter months, sulks here and there, spreading the scent of sadness. Maybe he misses his bard, no one knows because he won’t talk about it. Now think Eskel in the keeps library looking for books he’s read over and over before, and Geralt comes in after doing his chores and walks over to him and just leans against him. Eskel knew it was gonna happen sooner or later, hums, and picks out one of Geralt’s favourite books. He gets the wolf to sit next to the fire with him. By supper time, Lambert finds them laying next to the hearth with Eskel reading out loud and Geralt sleeping with his hair being played with.

With Lambert It’s different, no I don’t think Lambert’s the one to just sit there in silence, I think he bottles it up and gets angry easier. Mixing Eskel into the situation, i bet he’s a lot more daring than Geralt would be, more likely to chunk Lambert off the roof of Kaer Morhen, or tackle him out of nowhere. Not saying Geralt wouldn’t do it, but I feel as if Eskel can tell when Lambert’s gonna pop a lot quicker. This also goes with jokes, name calling, snarky remarks thrown at each other.

Now with Jaskier, I can totally see him and Eskel just reciting old poems written by dead poets. Maybe one night while Eskel is helping cook, and by that I mean he’s just making sure the stew was stirred, Jaskier comes marching in and whips out this poem that Eskel hasn’t heard in a while, but it’s the very poem Jaskier used to express he’s angry. Eskel would reply back with some poem he remembers back on, and they just go back and forth like that. Sometimes it’s just a couple of poems, but the longest they gone was almost four days.

Yes I want to add Vesemir into this, I saw some headcanons about Vesemir and Eskel having a close relationship as father & son and I love it so much. Man, when Lambert or Geralt ruffles Vesemir’s feathers a little too much, I love to think of Vesemir going out to the training grounds and doing drill over drill over drill, and Eskel comes to join him. Sometimes they talk, other times they just fall into sync. Maybe after Vesemir cooks Eskel his favourite soup because he appreciates him being there.

This can also be seen as big, middle or little sibling but I just think he radiates big brother energy so much.

What if Eskel was that uncle that was weird but everyone loves. Like Ciri had been completely fooled by the polite smile and manners, she once saw Eskel waving to his own imaginary crowd and swan dive onto Lambert, wrestle around a little bit and then threw him. He totally cheered himself on too.

Or she’s probably also seen Eskel in his trousers being followed by goats, his hair also has many tiny ponytails, and whenever one of his beloved goats yelled at him he just nods solemnly, “Yeah, I understand” or “oh I totally get it” are some of his answers to them.

I also would love to see the sibling rivalary between Geralt and Eskel, because Geralt maybe had told Ciri about how close him and Eskel are, so when she’s expecting to see them clap shoulders and share a brotherly moment, and not expecting to see Eskel walk up to Geralt and put a fishing hook in his cloak and begin running as fast as he could away from the others, well she’s very very surprised.

That but also some soft Eskel, like maybe the first few winters staying at Kaer Morhen, Ciri has some long lasting night terrors sometimes and if Geralt isn’t around, Eskel will scoop her up and hold her tightly against him to try and calm her back to sleep. He’ll read to her, softly sing songs his mother used to sing under his breath to Ciri, whatever she needs that he can give to her. He admits that seeing her cry like that reminds him of Geralt when they were younger, except now he can do stuff about it.

Idk, give me chaotic yet soft uncle Eskel, this man is bananas (b-a-n-a-n-a-s) and if you mix that with some soft stuff, it’s like the perfect smoothy.

🎄Merry Christmas🎄 and ✨happy holidays✨ to you all, hope everyone’s hands are warm. I have some Eskel Headcanons, here:

on a nice day with a hot sun and cooling breeze, Eskel will and has raced wild animals on Scorpion, it’s one of the only times he could give Scorpion a good gallop

When Eskel meditates, he purrs. He was always able to do that, sometimes it’s very soft and others it loud enough to be heard in the halls of Kaer Morhen

He is ridiculously good at sling shots, sometimes so good Geralt and Lambert don’t hear the shot and look like dorks trying to find out what the heck just hit them

The terrors during the trails scared all the kids, so Eskel would read to the boys when trails would go on, he remembered when Geralt told him one night it helped focus on something else

When short of coin, he probably helps the town mage to make up the coin he owes, or do some heavy town work, he’s good with healing and bits of building

He probably tells Geralt the same horse joke every year and still laughs at it with Geralt

Has earned the trust of a baby bear once, carried the bear after saving the mom from a trap, one of the best stories he likes to tell

Like Geralt talking to Roach, Eskel talks to trees, they’ve been around as long as he has, they’re great listeners

His happy place is in the mountains with lots of land and farm animals, breathing in the cold air in mornings and watching the sun hide behind the mountains at night, it what he thinks of during dark moment

I hope you guys like those, I’d love to know. I’ll try to do more of these if so—

Y’know, it’s not that I’m tired of soft Eskel headcanons, I just equally want Eskel headcanons where he gets upset, down in the dumps, angry, etc.

Imagining Eskel walking into town and getting a contract, talking to the contractor and finding out the the Witcher before that tried to take this beast down didn’t make it? I know they say Witcher’s don’t have emotion, but thinking of the overwhelming feeling he’d get is enough to keep his jaw tense through the entire thing, his wrists and fingers sore from clenching and unclenching. He mourns pretty hard for them, since no one else is gonna do it for these Witcher’s.

Or seeing Eskel fuss over Lambert in Kaer Morhens kitchen, they’re suppose to be making dinner when Lambert uses the wrong ingredients, and he’s not upset over that, but the facts that Lambert kept putting the wrong things in it on purposes after made him set things down roughly and inhale sharply through his nose, before walking out with a long and heavy sigh. He walked the walls a couple of times that night to cool off.

Possibly the saddest of the bunch is maybe he’s having a good day, didn’t get as injured on a hunt and got paid full price and while he’s walking back to Scorpion, a babe let’s put a startled cry from the look of him, causing the mother to startle at him too. This caused a chain reaction, more eyes and more disgusted and terrified looks sent his way and he only just realized he left his hood down. It completely shatters his mood.

I love making headcanons for happy Eskel, but adding a mix of both happy and sad headcanons makes my cake. I like to think that he also has support there for him of course, after ever shower is sunshine.

Thinkin’ soft moments like times Jaskier gets Geralt to laugh, like a deep belly laugh, or its surprised out of him.

Something like maybe.... Jaskier wakes up in the middle of the night, with travel time sometimes his sleeping schedule gets off centre, so he sits up and rubs his eyes and accepts that was all he’s gonna get for the night. After sitting for a moment, he realizes that Geralt is awake too, tending to the fire to keep light. It was smaller than when it was first made, so the light from it was dim, perfect for seeing both sleep deprived men but keeping everything beyond that in the shadows.

He’s spent more nights than he could count like this with Geralt, mainly on the path but sometimes in the villiages they stay in, too. Though, normally Jaskier tries to find something(someone) who will give him a good enough time to knock out after. That being said, during these times it’s normal for them to be, well quiet. No, Jaskier is no quiet man, but just being able to sit there with Geralt and just have that small peace— it was kind of nice.

So when Geralt mumbles something to him, well he wasn’t awake enough to hear.

“Hm? What was that, darling?” Jaskier asks, turning his head to the side, tired eyes watching Geralt. Geralt moves with him, slumping back against the small tree behind him and crossing his (sexy) arms over his broad triangle frame, and says “look up.”

So that’s what they do. After Jaskier looks up, Geralt convinces him to stand and takes him to a place he found while trying to hunt for their dinner. It was a small field filled with normal field things, probably a bit smaller than the courtyard of Kaer Morhen. The sky was over all clear with a few clouds here and there, and the moon was at a perfect place to cast its lovely shine on the overgrowth.

Jaskier shoots Geralt a small questioning look, but is lightly shoved in response, and follows Geralt into the field. The patches of tall gross come up to about Jaskier’s lower thigh, so when he wasn’t watching his step he was watching it wave in the howling wind. Doesn’t take Geralt long either to stop them and flop onto the dusty ground. Jaskier isn’t so tough like that so he crumbles to the ground with more grace and lays on his back with Geralt, and they begin to talk.

Waking up in the middle of the night for Jaskier was weird enough, but waking up and going to a secret place and star gazing while you talk about random things to someone you have grown to love, one could say Jaskier was having a good night. Time has passed and the topic Jaskier and Geralt are now on going something like...... hmm... “it starts when you’re young, you follow people’s reactions, or listen to them. An example is like being told dogs are a good thing to play and love on, so you make that apart of the ‘good’ or ‘safe’ for yourself—“

“mhm, mhm.”

“—but you’re also told that, something like ants are bad, either taught so or you’ve learned on your own. If my songs could change some people’s opinions, imagine the days where parents tell their kids that’s a Witcher’s coming to save them and instead of that taught fear now, it’s joy and happiness.” Jaskier finishes, hands connecting over his stomach as he retraces a constellation with his eyes.

“Mm. Some places are like that now, have I told you about the little girl who came up to me?” Geralt continues, tilting his head a little towards Jaskier, who tilts back towards him. “What? What happened?” Jaskier watches as Geralt moves back with a small smile, slowly blinking up at the stars. “She thanked me.”

Jaskier smiles to himself, rolling into his own space again and laying in silence once again. He knew Geralt was happy for the change, thankful for it. He deserved all of it, really, and Jaskier was happy to give him that. After a moment, Geralt licks his lips, “say, if you were to tell a kid about Witcher’s for the first time, what would you tell them?”

Curiosity always got the best of everything, and it’s also easily contagious. “Well, what wouldn’t I say? Hmmm, how they help with keeping their homes safe? How strong and powerful witchers are? I...” he paused, his hand coming up to tap at his chin in thought before turning to Geralt. “I’d probably tell them You smell.”

And that’s what gets him. Geralt’s head leans back and his face breaks into a wide grin, a booming laugh comes out and it’s a good laugh. Jaskier is so taken back, smiling and absolutely enraptured by the sound, the sight and Geralt. The laugh was short, but forever shall it reply and reply in Jaskier’s head as one of his favourite sounds, he also gets a small shove after Geralt’s reducers to chuckles.

This kinda turned out longer than I though, but I hope you guys like it. It was a cute idea to write down.

Hey so what if Jaskiers entire family were hunters? Or just really rough and rowdy, fighters. They grew up fighting and hunting but Jask is the “odd ball” in his family because he’s against violence?

Like, let’s take his family for a moment, now imagine with me: a giant man with nothing but pure muscle, people have to look up at him to speak. Geralt would he shocked at meeting him, Jaskier’s father looks more like a tame bear than human, though jaskier gets his smile, laugh and humour from him.

For his mother? I’d love to say she’s just as scary as Jaskiers father, very intimidating, she looks like she can handle her own shit. She’s gotta round up all of the kids? Give her five minutes. Also I think she’d also be tall (tall intimidating women please end me thanks).

I just like the thought of Jaskiers family being  excellent hunters/fighters who continually look for competition. Maybe it throws Geralt for a loop, finding out that Jaskier came from a family of fighters and knows how to use different weapons, but prefers poetry and art, a lover.