Tw Truama - Tumblr Posts
The Things I Hear
This one's a bit worse actually, not like making you ball your eyes out, but it's personal, cathartic to a degree so, keep weary.
I heard you had a new family, the little boy you've always wanted. I thought it would hurt, thought I'd feel disappointed you finally found peace. I think a part of me wanted to, but no. I'm not leaping at your absence, but I never wished for you to fail. I'm a bigger person now, I'm not the little girl you thought was like her mother. Willing, excusing, not only of your behaviors, but of you.
As a little girl I understood why she did it, why she stood by you despite your faithlessness. As a little girl, I didn't understand why she got so angry she cried, cried to me, cried to you, cried to gods she didn't believe in. You broke a good woman some days, and I'll never forgive you for that; but I will forgive being human. Because at the end of the long, restless, days, you are still, human.
I gave myself time. Like I had given you. All the time we could need, and more, and nothing ever changed and nothing ever will and, I think I'm okay with that now. You don't make dying horses drink, you don't lead dead men to water, and I won't with you. Not anymore.
I heard you had a new family. Heard you've stepped up to your roles. Heard you found peace. Though never hearing from you, I almost relish in what I hear.
Thank you, For setting the example of what not to look for, not just in men, but in people. For all it was worth, you did leave a few good things behind. Besides me and the others.
Casual Wednesday night activities: go to the grocery store minutes after being forced to relive your truama!
This is for all the people that wish more happened to them so their truama/ truama responses could be “more valid”:
THAT IS A SIGN OF MAJOR TRUAMA BABE <3
*especially if you were dealing with emotional abuse because that often involves gaslighting <3*
And as for the argument of “other people have gone through worse”? UTTER BULLSHIT other people, hell, people around you could’ve gone through “worse” truama and that does not mean your truama is immediately invalid. You’re allowed to have your own thoughts and feelings without them being proportioned next to someone else’s.
My grandfather would pick me up from school, ask me how my day was, and if I expressed even the slightest bit of being unsatisfied with my day, he would say “oh well you know who never gets good school days? Starving children in Africa 😀”
Do you see how idiotic that sounds? Yeah, that’s what you’re doing to yourself every day when you invalidate your trauma. (Not calling you idiotic btw, just trying to prove a point. You’re not stupid, you’re being manipulated.)
Btw this also goes for the ppl with any mental illness (but particularly depression) that don’t have any trauma so they have nothing to “blame” it on and feel invalid. You’re depressed bc the world around you sucks. You don’t need trauma to see that.
Anyways stay safe, drink water, and try to be nice to yourself for a day!
*read this user’s DNI’s before interacting*
TW‼️ mention of ED⬇️
“Wow you ate all that??”
“I can’t believe you could finish that plate!”
“Seconds already?”
Yes and I have an ED so it was difficult. Shut up <3
Honestly though, the amount of times I’ve been told this and comments similar to these is just…..
My dad was like “you need to stop skipping meals!!” As if the reason I do that isn’t because he’s constantly made fun of my weight since I was 3 years old. (That’s not an exaggeration btw)
I still vividly remember when I was 3, sitting at my grandparents dining room table with them and my parents and my dad started on a 20 minute rant about how I was overweight and needed to start doing exercises. I WAS THREE.
Children remember every little comment. Don’t be a dick.
*read this user’s DNI’s before interacting*
The worst part about childhood trauma is that they never remember what they did to you.
“I never remember all these things you always bring up…” (actual quote from my father btw)
The second worst part is that you still love them.
Mommy issues and daddy issues aren’t something that should be sexualized. That’s all.