Vacation Doodles Vol.3: Vega Edition.

Vacation doodles vol.3: Vega Edition.

Angsty & scarred Tank art under the cut. It's not that bad but I figured I should give you a warning just in case.

Whoops, guess it's time to project myself onto them again.

The Redacted cast as shit I say too much:

Milo: We love a man who [insert anything] his girlfriend/wife/mother of his children.

Lovely: Love that.

Vincent: Lovely.

Asher: I'm gonna take a sleepy now.

Freelancer: Oh waw. [Usually accompanied by: O-O]

Gavin: *insert any swear word at all*

Brachium: I forgot. [Occasionally accompanied by: ._."]

Damien: Tf are you supposed to be? [Or: Tf is that supposed to be?]

Darlin: I'll talk to you later. [I, in fact, won't talk to you later. I'll text you again in three months. Goodbye.]

Vega: I am very sane.

Describing Redacted characters in one sentence or less (brackets don't count) but it gets progressively less comprehensive:

David: Big werewolf alpha dude (not the cringe kind)

Milo: Smol werewolf dude (the big kind)

Damien: Hot tsundere (literally)

Morgan: Non-existent

Guy: A heart-shaped pizza with all your favorite toppings that you can top yourself if you want-

Nick: Cat boi (definitely the cringe kind)

Ollie: Comfort food

Blake: Cold soup

Gavin: The reason I cry myself to sleep once a week

James: Needs to go tf home.

Asher: The canonical energizer bunny

Lasko: Me

Huxley: Me on anxiety meds

Caelum: Cotton candy given human form.

Anton: A testament to Erik's voice acting and general acting skills.

Marcus: Very killable.

Kody: Looks like great cake but actually went bad five months ago.

Elliott: Had an edible for breakfast and hasn't eaten since.

Hudson: Trying to eat serotonin with chopsticks.

Brachium: An edible pretending to be a gummy worm.

Vincent: Talks like what perfume tastes like.

Ivan: Saltwater in your eyes but it might just be your tears and you honestly don't even care at this point.

Aaron: Sand in your mouth and between your teeth but you're enjoying it.

Sam: If blankets could talk, they'd sound and speak like him.

Eric: That feeling you get when looking at an empty closet.

Camelopardalis: Anxiety meds in the form of a flesh prison.

Avior: If you unhinged your jaw, you could eat him.

Vega: You can drink him with a straw (and only with a straw).

Hush: You can eat him.

Redacted characters and listeners as pieces of advice I, your residential writer and overthinker, would like to give all of you:

Darlin: If you're going traveling by public transportation or are going anywhere shady, buy all of your drinks on your way in glassware. Don't buy plastic bottles, buy glass. You'll feel a lot safer with a bottle made from glass in your hands when a creep comes talking to you.

David: When you're in a hotel, you can check for one way mirrors by putting your finger on its surface. If there's a little bit of space between your finger and its reflection, then it's a normal mirror. If not and your finger and its reflection are touching, then you should probably leave that hotel and never go there again.

Ollie: Percentages are reversible. 25% of 8 is the same as 8% of 25 (2), 17% of 112 is the same as 112% of 17 (19,04), and so on.

Blake: You can make chloroform by mixing bleach and rubbing alcohol. No I will not tell you any measurements, go figure it out yourself.

Bestie: Chloroform does not work the way it is often portrayed in movies. It will take a good five minutes of inhaling it to pass out. So just use a syringe.

Freelancer: Cuts to the forehead bleed an excessive amount because the face and scalp both have so many blood vessels very close to the skin. So, if you find yourself in a fight and are armed with something sharp, cut your opponent's forehead to (maybe blind them, but mainly to) annoy the hell out of them.

Baabe: You can remove permanent marker from your clothes by using hand sanitizer and from your carpet by using vinegar.

Milo: You can most effectively kick down a door by kicking near its lock (not on it, why would you even do that?) and driving your heel into the door rather than trying to get your whole foot through. You should also really lean into it to get the best results.

Vincent: This differs from individual to individual, but normally a person will starve after about anywhere from 30 to ~50 days. I know, that's a really broad timespan, that's why it's so important that it differs from person to person and why it's so infuriating to make a character starve in a book - it takes so much time to figure out how long this specific person with their specific body type and circumstance will take to die of starvation!

Very creative idea I just had:

"Guess which Redacted character/listener this questionable quote out of my W.I.P. folder is from" (title is an obvious W.I.P. as well, as you can no doubt tell)

No.1: "Well, in comparison, I’m probably a lot more lonely than you because I live alone and whatever, but, you know, in a sense of words and fancy shit and not in a sense of logical comparison, we’re basically in the same boat."

No.2: "I didn’t say I won’t do it. We’ve been preparing this since last week. I’m not about to get cold feet last minute, [CHARACTER_NAME]." (...) "But promise me you’ll sanitize the needle properly? I’m not about to get some weird infection just because you were being a slob."

No.3: "This doesn’t feel like a safe idea."

No.4: "(...) Mister Echo might follow in your nonexistent footsteps and start talking to us from the void again, but apart from that, the schedule for today is empty."

No.5: "But bothering you just happens to be higher on my list of priorities."

You can find the correct answers under the cut!

Here are the right answers:

No.1: Darlin'

No.2: Christian

No.3: Sam

No.4: Hudson

No.5: Asher

Congraties if you guessed any of these correctly, here's your gold star: ☆