Asexuals Are Valid - Tumblr Posts
Dumbasses: Being aseuxal is unnatural!
*the over 2000 species of animals that produce asexually*
Dumbasses: Being gay is unnatural! It's Adam end Eve not Adam and Steve!
*the over 1500 species of animals that show same-sex relationship behaviors.*
Dumbasses: you can't be trans! God intended for you to be a boy/girl!
*the 5% of animals that can change gender*
Dumbasses: you can't be intersex! Your a boy or a girl!
*the 65,000 species of animals that have both male and female organs*
If it was unnatural, then why did Mother Nature make these animals?
This pride we have GOT to stop making fun of bi women with boyfriends btw . I’m so so serious .
The Invalidation and Abuse of Asexuals is Alive: My Story
*mentions of self harm
Full Disclosure: This occurred while I was a sophomore in high school- I am now a senior. I identify as queer and at the time of this relationship was questioning if I was asexual but I was fairly certain.
When I was a sophomore in high school I had a girlfriend who emotionally abused me. At first I didn’t recognize that that was what it was but I have had a couple years to evaluate now and I understand that what was happening was not normal.
So to give you some background, I was questioning at the time whether I was asexual or not. I had no urge to have sex regardless of whether I was or not, I was only in high school for crying out loud. But I had a girlfriend who really wanted to have sex.
I explained to her that I didn’t really want to have sex and that I was questioning if I was asexual. It felt at first like she wanted to understand. She would ask me questions about asexuality but then she would ask deeply personal questions about what turned me on, if anything did at all and if I masturbated. If we had been dating for longer, I may not have thought it was as weird but I was naive at the time of this situation and I also was not as comfortable with my sexuality.
Regardless I could brush of that first part and I don’t really find that so much abusive as just strange, kinda weird but oh well. It’s later that it became emotionally abusive.
She would text me at night, asking me if I didn’t want to have sex with her because she disgusted me. I would try and reassure her and tell her that I thought she was gorgeous and besides that I didn’t care what she looked like, I loved her anyways. She would get weirdly defensive and say that I knew she had depression and I can’t just keep her from having sex because it makes her feel like she’s awful.
Now I want to say, I understand that depression is an awful mental disorder to deal with but in no way shape or form should it ever be used as a tactic to get someone to feel bad like this. It should never be used to get your partner to have sex with you.
I felt so guilty. Even though I knew that I wasn’t disgusted by her, she made me feel like I was simply by not having sex with her. She made me feel like I was ruining her mental health by not having sex with her. I was constantly trying to do something to appease her so she wouldn’t bring up the sex topic. It was ruining my mental health.
She would ask me to do other sexual acts so that she could be satisfied but I wouldn’t have to have sex. Which at the time felt like a compromise but believe me- it’s not.
If you don’t want to do anything sexual you are in no way obligated to.
Of course there was other emotional abuse that was occurring regarding the fact that I never called her, she made me pick, unknowingly, which wrist she should cut and other things but this was the specific abuse towards my asexuality.
M E
TWO AROMANTICS SITTING IN A TREE
F-U-C-K-I-N-G BECAUSE AROMANTIC IS NOT EQUIVALENT TO ASexual and many aromantics experience sexual attraction thank you this has been a PSA
~~~
TWO AROACES SITTING IN A TREE
T-A-L-K-I-N-G about dragons or something idk, and they also still love each other a lot because romantic and sexual love are not the only kinds of love and no kind of love is more “valid” or “better” than any other thank you this has been a PSA
This sounds fun, so I’m doing it, but don’t expect me to actually keep up with it with any level of consistency.
My pronouns: she/her
Pride flags: biromantic asexual (probably... I’m still questioning.)
Well, well, well, will you look at that? It’s Pride again.
You know the drill by now. It’s June 1, and suddenly everything from banks to big box stores has slapped a rainbow on their logo. Rainbow capitalism knows how to target LGBTQIA+ customers. For exactly 30 days of the year. How quaint.
Of course, it’s nice to make things bright, and colorful, and pretty. But it’s meaningless if that’s all it is.
Pride should be about uplifting and celebrating you, the community. And it should be year-round, not just 8.22% of the year. So, we’re signal-boosting your posts that celebrate, support, and honor all genders and sexualities over here. Follow to keep your dashboard lovely and gay as hell all year round.
And, yes, we’re also making a bit of a fuss right here on @celebrate (apparently, we just can’t help ourselves). So if you’re interested in talking about what Pride means to you or want to celebrate Pride but don’t know how to go about it this year, we made a fun little 30-day Share Your Pride Challenge list. Because you do, in fact, deserve to be celebrated.
Tag your posts with #ShareYourPride if you want to make them a little easier for other people to find. And Tumblr? Happy Pride. We’re glad you’re here.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but…
Dumbledore? Hmmm? Maybe Luna Lovegood as well? And… Perry the Platypus, maybe? He is a platypus, they don’t do much. Plus, there are some non-aros who code as ace— good ol’ Papyrus Undertale, for instance. Probably Spock. I think McGonagall might’ve been ace, she took a long time to get married, only did it once and never had kids (I looked all that up). Bruce Banner and Natasha Romanov, as well, even though Banner’s is sort of trauma induced, I think if Romanov wanted to have InTiMaTe ReLaTiOnS she could even if she couldn’t get pregnant. Lots of rep around if you look for it.
Okay so we might have very little to no official aro/ace/aroace representation in media BUT it doesn't mean there are none of them there. Wanna show a confused homie what it means to be aro/ace through media examples? Watch:
Bilbo Baggins. The absolute aroace legend. Spent half of his life vibing solo in a wonderful house and the second half having incredible adventures/traveling alone or with dwarf homies. Goals.
Po from Kung Fu Panda. Romance is broke, Kung Fu is woke. Living with a bunch of friends doing your passion/s together? What a dream. Not to mention the beautiful platonic brother/sister relationship Po has with Tigress. If you ever try to explain a platonic soul mate, say you want to have the type of friendship Po and Tigress do at the second movie. *mwah*
L from Death Note. Who needs sex or romance when you have such incredible mysteries going on in the world plus tons of sweets? Piorities people, priorities!
Jotaro Kujo is an asexual icon and that's a fact. Bro could have had half a population of girls from his school in his arms if he wanted to (and probably boys too, I mean, just look at him). Seems like he's more interested in dolphins than sex thoe.
Maui from Moana. You can only dream he's gonna fall in love for anything other than his muscles. And I think it's beautiful.
Hades from Disney's Hercules. What can be better than vibing your salty ass in hell with your adorable three headed dog to the tunes of screaming souls for eternity? Edgy aro goals.
If you have more to add: Go on! Let's make a list of aro/ace characters for future generations!
I’ve just thought of a half-decent analogy to describe asexuality to allosexuals, perhaps even for aromanticism as well. It works best for sex-indifference, but I think it applies either way, so. Bear with me.
Have you ever seen a pair of mittens and immediately, instinctively, unprompted, thought about what it would feel like to wear them? What their fabric feels like? How your hands would feel inside them, what they look like on the inside? Precisely how warm they’d be? To the point where even if you’d never seen those mittens before and never see them again, you might even think about them after? No? Yea, me neither.
Imagine you’re out shopping with a group of friends and you see a lineup of mittens. Everyone’s jumping over eachother to point out, “oh, I’ve gotta wear this one,” “guys, look at this one,” “I need these” “this is totally my style” “I bet these are so comfy” and then someone looks at you, just standing there because…wtf. And they go “What about you? Which mittens do you wanna wear? C’mon, I know you want at least one!” Would you pick a pair of mittens? It seems like a relatively low stakes social interaction, they all seem to be having fun, nothing about this will truly affect the mittens at this time, you don’t have to buy anything, and there’s plenty of aesthetic criteria to base the choice on if you want. Would you pick one? I would. Many of us did.
Imagine right now, you learned a new fact that has always been true about the world and that everyone else sees as normal: 99% of people see some pair of mittens, maybe 1 in every 20, and immediately and instinctively think about wearing them, like I described earlier. They want to, they feel what’s described as a biological urge to wear those mittens. Sometimes they do, sometimes they don’t, sometimes they check out the mittens first, sometimes they just wear a pair of mittens they found on the sidewalk without knowing anything about them. Feeling this was is considered normal, and everyone has assumed you feel this way too, because this is the default. That inclination is normal, and you’re weird.
What would you think? Perhaps some level of what the fuck? But there’s no problem with wearing mittens, you guess, you just didn’t realize people actually felt that way, you thought they were exaggerating or joking around, but no. Would you struggle to believe it? Would you pretend to feel the same? What would you say the next time someone asked you about what kind of mittens you want to wear, knowing that’s what they really mean, knowing you’ve never felt that way about a pair of mittens?
People judge you now for not feeling as inclined to wear specific mittens as they do. Even some friends stick their hands in their pockets when you walk up, and stop talking about mittens at all because they don’t want to make you uncomfortable. Perhaps they act as if you don’t have hands, or insist you just haven’t found the right pair of mittens yet. For all you know, you could still find that “perfect pair” but time just keeps going and you’re clearly missing something. People accuse you of lying, laugh at you, maybe even try to shove mittens onto your hands just to show you how it feels, to “fix” you. Will you wear mittens just to appease the masses? Will you pretend to want mittens you don’t really care about? None of this makes any sense to you!
I think the analogy is pretty clear at this point, but I really want to emphasize that I’m not exaggerating here. The analogy isn’t perfect, but as far as I’ve taken it, it emotionally follows. The idea that someone could look at someone else, especially someone they don’t know, and immediately imagine them naked or want to touch them or whatever sounds just as ridiculous as someone achieving climax from wearing a pair of mittens. When people asked me who my “crush” was as a kid, like many aces and aros, I just picked a random person because I didn’t understand.
I have nothing against sex, I feel quite neutral about it and if you’re having it and enjoying it, I’m happy for you… but I just don’t care to try it. I shouldn’t have to. Just accept that I don’t care that much about the mittens.
Made this while playing Stardew Valley and procrastinating on the thing I was writing 🙃🙃
(The art’s not the greatest thing I’ve done but I tried—no I’m not looking for sympathy on that, I’m just saying I’m better at writing than drawing lol)
Here's your friendly remider that aces and aros are real, valid and are queer enough to be part of the community. If you think other wise you're free to get off my page. (I will not fight anyone on this. I'll block anyone that disagrees, no questions asked.)
Asexuals who masturbate? Valid.
Asexuals who don't masturbate? Valid.
Asexuals who experience sexual attraction? Valid.
Asexuals who never experience sexual attraction? Valid.
Asexuals who are sexually active? Valid.
Asexuals who never had sex? Valid.
Asexuals who watch porn? Valid.
Asexuals who don't want to watch porn? Valid.
Asexuals who read smut? Valid.
Asexuals who dress sexy? Valid.
Asexuals who are heteroromantic? Valid.
Asexuals who are aromantic? Valid.
Asexuals of any romantic orientation? Valid.
Asexuals who are POC? Valid.
Asexuals who aren't cis? Valid.
Asexuals who are guys? Valid.
Asexuals who aren't skinny? Valid.
Asexuals who are disabled? Valid.
Asexuals who are neurodivergent? Valid.
Asexuals who simply exist? Valid as f*ck.
There are no rules to being asexual so just be yourself and other people can f*ck off. You are valid as f*ck and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. ASEXUALS ARE A PART OF THE LGBTQIA+ COMMUNITY!!! THE "A" STANDS FOR ASEXUAL, AROMANTIC AND AGENDER NOT FOR ALLY!!! Hope everyone had a great Ace Awareness Week!
(Feel free to add things to this unless you're gonna be aphobic then I will come and beat your *ss tyvm)
Asexuality is a spectrum so it can come in many forms and ways, not everyone experiences it the same way but that doesn't make them less valid!
Asexuals who masturbate? Valid.
Asexuals who don't masturbate? Valid.
Asexuals who experience sexual attraction? Valid.
Asexuals who never experience sexual attraction? Valid.
Asexuals who are sexually active? Valid.
Asexuals who never had sex? Valid.
Asexuals who watch porn? Valid.
Asexuals who don't want to watch porn? Valid.
Asexuals who read smut? Valid.
Asexuals who dress sexy? Valid.
Asexuals who are heteroromantic? Valid.
Asexuals who are aromantic? Valid.
Asexuals of any romantic orientation? Valid.
Asexuals who are POC? Valid.
Asexuals who aren't cis? Valid.
Asexuals who are guys? Valid.
Asexuals who aren't skinny? Valid.
Asexuals who simply exist? Valid as f*ck.
There are no rules to being asexual so just be yourself and other people can f*ck off. You are valid as f*ck and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. ASEXUALS ARE A PART OF THE LGBTQIA+ COMMUNITY!!! THE "A" STANDS FOR ASEXUAL, AROMANTIC AND AGENDER NOT FOR ALLY!!! Hope everyone had a great Ace Awareness Week!
(Feel free to add things to this unless you're gonna be aphobic then I will come and beat your *ss tyvm)
Asexuals and Aromantics
Instead of saying you don't feel sexual/romantic attraction start saying you are immune to Aphrodite's powers
You're welcome ;)