When I Met Him, He Lived With His Folks In One Of The Small Towns Just Outside Of The City In Which I

When I met him, he lived with his folks in one of the small towns just outside of the city in which I live. It's a pretty cute town, but as you can imagine, I have some complicated feelings toward it.

Yesterday I spent some time there reading by the water. I've decided I will make peace with it. I will also spend time there, if I please, and not cower away from the prospect of running in to his parents or his sisters.

I am not ashamed, and I will not hide.

Tension

My uncle the Pedophile left today.

Every part of me is exhaling.

Someone call River Laurent. Tell them that 1995 called and they want their horrible trope back.

@staff do you not have a toothpaste ad or something? Why do you keep showing me this horrible shit?

Cptsd fun.

i basically assume that people don’t like me unless they explicitly tell me they like me and then periodically remind me

A little over a week ago I was going through a strong " missing him" phase. At those times I try to reread some of my old posts to snap out of it.

This one is a gem.

IT WAS THAT BAD

When we were working on the basement last summer, he got some concrete work done. So there was  some time where the floor in the basement was all broken up.  He told me if I kept upsetting him he’d bury my body there and cover me up with concrete.  

No one would ever know.

His parents had a dog, and he was immeasurably sweet to her. In fact he was kinder to her than he ever was to me.