When My Phone Rings, I Get Tense. If It's A Number I Don't Recognize, I Panic.

When my phone rings, i get tense. If it's a number I don't recognize, I panic.

Another one of those things people think I should just be 'over.'

I just woke up in my bed. In our bed. The paint,the furniture, the sounds. All our home. i could feel his leg against mine.

I wish i could say repulsion is what I feel. It's longing.

Just to crush my hopes and dreams, he told me that if I got a dog, it wouldn't snuggle with me.

Fuck it. Spoiler below for a A Star is Born:

Tw - suicide and suicide baiting.

Streak Over

I was just thinking to myself the other day how it has been at least a month since I have cried properly. Yesterday I went to a movie and it triggered something fierce.

I wish I’d done what I normally do and read the plot ahead of time to be prepared.

I’m actually torn between sending a warning about it and spoiling the movie. .

That did not take long. He just stopped me in the street as I was walking to my car.

I ducked out by saying I didn't have time to talk. I would have humoured him before. Maybe flirted. The thought makes me sick now.

Woo! Progress!

Tw - fat shaming

When he thought, at one point, i had put on too much weight he told me he would not stick with a woman who let herself go.

According to him, men don't like bigger women. In fact all men really like the same body type - very thin. Any man who says otherwise is just saying so for woke points.

Men who date bigger girls do so because they lack the confidence to pursue "better" women.

He didn't lack confidence, so I had to nip that issue in the bud. Or accept the consequences.