Aftg Headcanon - Tumblr Posts

I know this is random but neils most likely never seen the Adams family and know Andrew it's something that is a must have before he can he even consider saying they're dating. Andrews seen it a enough times to where even if he didn't have eidetic memory he could voice perfectly without any help, so he just watched Neil react to it and it's one of the greatest thing hes witnessed to this day. Neil fell in love with it and Andrew fell even more in love with Neil

(This was in my darfts and i wrote it a while ago, enjoy?)

Hi random thought!

What if Andrew has a whole fuck'n album of pictures dedicated to Neil, he also has screenshots of texts that meant the most to him. Not only that but what if Andrew kept voice mails from Neil to listen to when they're at different games and have to stay in a diffrent state. And this stuff isn't even anything monumental it's just random shit Neil's sent andrew like a picture of one of the cats face covering neils mouth and only showing his eyes.

One time for Andrew's birthday neil sent him a voice mail of him tiredly sing happy birthday and he just passes out and the voice mail ends.

Another is of him try to say good luck untill of of his teammates interups thinking it's his girlfriend and then the team joining in.

Neil sends random close up pictures of the cats to piss him off and Andrew retaliates with badly taken pictures of himself until neil responds with 'that's not fair'

My Aaron Minyard headcanons that float around in my head all day every day and I need to write down before I forget them.

1. He is a mf with chronic migraines and he will let everyone know it and he will use it as an excuse to be an asshole.

2. He for sure wears Nike Blazers Mid 77s and baggy tops with baggy bottoms. And he’s a neutral/earth tones kinda person.

3. He is constantly cold and once again will let every know about it and bitch about it at least once a day. (It’s actually multiple times a day)

4. He will bitch about his course work and talk about dropping out at least once a week but you’ll catch him dead before you catch him ditching class.

5. He skateboards and he finds it fun but he also does it because he enjoys watching Kevin freak out about him potentially falling and hurting himself and fucking the team over.

my personal aftg headcannons as an athlete

neil suffers from chronic shin splints, since we never see this boy change into running shoes, (and even if he did they’d probably be years old and be hanging on by a thread) i like to think that his shins are just constantly in pain

aaron, being a med student, is probably the first person the foxes go to when something hurts. aaron likes to pretend that he doesn’t care about their aches but occasionally he’ll recommend specific stretches to some of them. “hey my knee has rlly been hurting when i run” -“wtf do you want me to do about that…try stretching your hamstrings befor complaining”

dan carries multiple rollers in her practice bag. at first it was just for her but then the girls would occasionally borrow it, and then matt, then the monsters made themselves welcome to using it so she started carrying multiple for them all to use at the same time.

allison probably has some rlly expensive massage guns for the same reason as dan but she denies that she was thinking about the rest of the team when she bought them all

renee, aaron, nicky, dan, and matt are all bio freeze people and neil, kevin, andrew, and allison are all icy hot for life

the one time nicky used icy hot he thought it was just supposed to get cold like bio freeze and so he thought he was having an allergic reaction when it started burning

renee is the designated kt-tape person when abby isn’t around since she’s the only one that can apply it good enough that it will last a week and properly work

renee and allison will either do matching french braids or bubble braids for games and they take turns braiding each others hair

the foxes convinced wymack and abby to host team pasta dinners the night before home games so the they can get in their carb load in and have a “team bonding activity”

Ive been bothering everyone I possibly can by dropping asks abt Aaron in their inbox soo it's ur turn now

Any Aaron hcs? Your opinion on skater boy Aaron?

And because I love Kevin too, any Kevin hcs? I feel like people tend to forget that Kevin likes photography too canonically besides exy and history

OMG I JUST SAW THIS THANK YOU FOR ASKING HEHEHEHE

Skater boy Aaron is real and true and canon (to me at least)

He is the poster boy for the early 2000s skater aesthetic

Part of the reason he continues skating in college is because he enjoys the heart attack it gives Kevin

Kevin doesn’t want him getting hurt and jeopardizing the team and his wellbeing

So Aaron makes sure he finds time to skate everyday

Aaron is a lover of pop culture and is just a fucking nerd dude

He loves Lord of the Rings and read Harry Potter as it came out (and also very actively hates JKR in the modern day)

Aaron Minyard is a chronic migraine girly

He’s a med student and athlete who gets very little sleep so his head constantly hurts

And yaknow what he’s a little bitch about it too

He is constantly complaining to Katelyn and using it as an excuse to be an asshole

(I love him so dearly)

I also think he is constantly cold and has terrible blood circulation

His hands and feet are always freezing

Years of drug use and constantly needing to take Advil for his headaches has just shot his cardiovascular system

So he’s constantly cold and doesn’t run a lot because his stamina is shit

He has a raging addiction to caffeine and his vice is RedBulls

His sleep schedule is absolutely wrecked from both Exy and school so he’s rarely ever without a RedBull in hand

I don’t think he cares a lot about his diet but he does try to keep it pretty nutrient packed bc he knows the benefits of it

But he also has a sweet tooth (not as strong as Andrew’s but still strong) and he favors baked goods like cake and banana bread and pastries

His vision is bad and it just keeps getting worse over the years but he doesn’t wear his glasses often

He usually resorts to contacts but has to switch to his glasses late at night or when his head is hurting extra bad

OKAY KEVIN FUCKING DAY

He loves tea

Like has an extensive tea collection and will spend the money to buy teas from around the world

He also has a mug collection (the Foxes start gifting him mugs every holiday when they find out about it)

His favorite mugs are his vintage Trojans mug, a “history is not boring” mug the Foxes gave him when he graduated, and a Hogwarts mug Aaron gave him

(they read the series together :P)

Kevin’s favorite areas of history to study are Ancient Rome and the history of Ireland

He’s fascinated by the Roman Empire and studying Ireland makes him feel more connected to his mother

I think he continues school on the side and eventually gets a doctorate degree and teaches a bit after he retires from Exy

He always tries to sign with teams in or near the cities the other OG Foxes are in because he doesn’t really know how to function without the familiarity of his people

Kevin works a lot on undoing his Raven dietary habits and since he’s surrounded by people who can’t cook he grows a love for frozen food as well as caffeine

I think he takes a few art classes and really enjoys it even though he doesn’t think he’s that great at it

He’s actually not bad at all and makes a lot of really cool pieces

Kevin exclusively wears 5 inch inseam shorts

Anything longer is blasphemous

He has basically zero sense of style and just kind of mimics what the others are wearing

Until Allison forces him to go to the mall with her and they spend hours building him a real wardrobe that is him

Most of his closest still consists of PSU and USC merch though

And truly would this even be me if I didn’t put kevaaron headcanons? No

Kevin is basically a human radiator, especially after practice

And that is a blessing directly from God in Aaron’s eyes

Kevin comes back from night practice and Aaron just clings to him, absorbing all of his heat as they fall asleep

Aaron is a chronic clothes stealer like he just has sticky fingers when it comes to Kevin’s wardrobe

They spend a lot of time together in the library

They’re both in quite intensive and workload heavy majors so they study together a lot

It happened more as an accident tbh like Aaron was heading to the library to study for a midterm

And basically all of PSU’s student body had the same idea so there was no open tables

But low and behold there was Kevin, alone at a table tucked in the back corner, typing away at his laptop

Aaron joins him without asking and it kinda just becomes their thing

Kevin joins Aaron at the library between regular and night practices

They spend most of their weekends there and bring each other caffeinated drinks and snacks

Eventually they’re not even studying half the time, they’re just talking and spending time with each other outside of Exy and the other Foxes curious glances and prying comments

Aaron takes a history class with Kevin but Kevin refuses to take any science class outside of his required credits

He’s not a science person so Aaron doesn’t take it personally

Kevin can never properly wrap his head around how strong Aaron actually is

It just doesn’t compute for him, like how can so much strength be packed into such a small body

But he is most definitely not complaining, especially not when that strength is so clearly but on display or used against him

Kevin is practically drooling anytime he watches Aaron body check a striker twice his size and send them sprawling onto the floor

They become each others partners/marks during practices and it is simultaneously the best and worst thing to ever happen

They’re just excessively flirting while tripping each other and fighting with their racquets

The other Foxes comment on their “weird and disturbing foreplay” every chance they get

Are exy players really just violent/jacked butterfly catchers?

Kevin Day: I’ll have your daughter home by eight, sir

Kevin Night: Your daughter calls me daddy too 

the foxes’ kids and andreil (this is so long but i don’t care!)

none of the foxes’ children qualify for the team, which is all that matters

they have been taught from a very early age that both uncle andrew and uncle neil have been hurt by bad people, and that means they don’t always like to be touched

the kids are usually really good with it because they understand in their very simple, youthful way, but sometimes they do slip up

it’s pretty widely accepted that andrew is better with kids than neil

one time amalia (kevin and thea’s daughter) gets so excited to see andrew after months apart she runs and jumps on him

kevin has a 2-second heart attack, but andrew obediently picks her up and listens as she rambles on about watching him play on TV and how he’s the best goalie ever and she thinks he should have a statue-

neil gets better with them as they get older, he’s just easily overwhelmed by their energy sometimes and has no idea how to track all the different conversations happening around him

but all his friends know he loves their kids fiercely and they’re perfectly happy to send them on short trips with him to the grocery store for ice cream and such

they usually come back with more than that because the kids figure out they just have to look at neil with big eyes and he’s like “ok yeah we can get a whole sheet cake, too”

“neil what the fuck” “dan, he said it’s your birthday” “neil i know you know when my birthday is”

when they’re little, the best thing neil can do is play a very toned down version of exy with them in the backyard when they all get together

this is especially good with allison’s mansion because there’s so much space, and she always has a table of snacks and drinks waiting off to the side that nicky just stands by and continuously eats from

all the parents have photos of neil teaching their kids how to hold rackets or pointing at the goal and gesturing while their kids stare up at him adoringly

andrew always watches because the sight of neil josten, fastest player in the us major leagues, taking tiny steps so as to not outrun a six year old is probably the best thing in the world

when allison’s youngest comes out as trans, andrew switches to calling her ashleigh and using the right pronouns immediately and without a hitch

aaron and katelyn end up having kids a bit later than everyone else, but surprise surprise they’re twin girls

it is no secret they are andrew’s favorite and no one is mad about it

they have the same blonde hair and they’re so small and fragile and he would set the world on fire for them

it brings him and aaron closer together, too

the girls are good at telling them apart, but sometimes one of them will go “daddy?” and andrew replies “try again” without missing a beat

they pick it up! aaron will be tired after a long day of doctoring and mix them up and they’ll say “try again” 

andrew is amused

whenever renee’s son spends time in the hospital or is at home on bed rest, andrew will send him long, handwritten letters about anything and nothing at all

no one else knows about the letters, but they make renee cry

when the kids get older and start their Angsty Teenage Years, they turn to aunt allison and uncle andrew to be angry

andrew’s apathy helps, because sometimes you just need someone to listen and let you feel things

one time amalia randomly calls andrew in a rage about how “dad is so obnoxious sometimes, oh my god, i cannot stand him and i’m outside right now because i just need space and i know everyone says i have to be patient with him but-” 

“you’re absolutely right, he’s an asshole”

it makes her stop frustration crying to laugh, then she’s quiet for a while, and then she says she’s going to go back in and talk to her dad

a while later kevin is visiting and talking about a terrible screaming match and the heart-to-heart they had after and he thinks he said something that was meaningful and got through to make her apologize

he doesn’t get why neil finds it so funny, he is actually a very wise and thoughtful father thank you very much

neil takes putting up the kids’ drawings on the fridge very seriously and andrew has to assure him they will not be hurt if the corner of someone else’s paper is covering theirs

neil also always agonizes over gifts, he’s so afraid of buying things they don’t like

sometimes andrew finds him just standing in front of the calendar where all their birthdays are neatly marked, frowning like he’s analyzing another team’s stats

andrew usually ends up doing all of it because it makes neil way too stressed

one of aaron’s girls gets a boyfriend in her junior year of high school that actually ends up cheating on her

it’s sad but she says it’s not that big of a deal because she wasn’t in love with him and she’s always been very mature about these things

after a healthy cry with katelyn she gets up and jokes about calling uncle andrew because that’s what all her “cousins” do when they’re in crisis

yes all the kids call each other cousins because they’re that close

aaron, who’s cooking dinner, thinks “aw that’s cute”

but then he realizes

and he flings himself into her room shrieking “nO NO DO NOT DO NOT TELL UNCLE ANDREW”

andrew, from the phone: “don’t tell me what”

aaron retreats, accepting his role in a possible crime, but he hovers out in the hall to listen in

there seems to be too much laughter for murder, so aaron prays it’s fine

the next day the girls return from school full of glee because someone slashed her ex’s tires right before dismissal!! no one knows who!! everyone is buzzing about it!!

“andrew did you really drive several hours to ruin some teenager’s car” “you don’t have any proof, and it was neil”

part 3 of my neil and the foxes headcanons coming soon! you can find them and more in the aftg headcanon tag on my blog :)

hc that immediately after the events of the trilogy neil crashes so hard. from christmas onwards his body has been abused and in various stages of healing and he is running through it all on adrenaline. this boy wins the championship and secures his safety and i bet just turns off.

there's no nathan or riko to be running from. the season is over, he has his trophy. there is nothing immediately pressing that concerns his performance on the court or his/andrew's/the team's safety and his body finally gets to come out of fight or flight and man is he fucking tired.

one time andrew and neil were on a drive to nowhere really late, like 2 am late because neil wanted to and andrew was bored. andrew blasted neils playlist for a change and put the all the windows down because he liked the air, and was focused on driving and heard neil humming one of his songs

naturally andrew looked over to neil and saw him with one hand out the window feeling the wind on his bare arms, andrews team jersey on and his old shorts that go down to his knees, his head tipped back quitly singing the lyrics to one of his favorite songs, looking relaxed and happy, like he wouldn't rather be anywhere else in the world than with andrew.

andrew just looked at him in the red street lights that made his hair look even more beautiful and he just was overwhelmed with the feeling of love for this man and was genuinely suprised for a moment.

then the corner of neils mouth went up for a second before murmuring "staring" and andrews eyes immediately stapped up to neils blue ones that were apparently open now and watching andrew openly look at him and again he was shocked and just said "560%." and neil just closed his eyes again while smiling.

the foxes’ kids and andreil (this is so long but i don’t care!)

none of the foxes’ children qualify for the team, which is all that matters

they have been taught from a very early age that both uncle andrew and uncle neil have been hurt by bad people, and that means they don’t always like to be touched

the kids are usually really good with it because they understand in their very simple, youthful way, but sometimes they do slip up

it’s pretty widely accepted that andrew is better with kids than neil

one time amalia (kevin and thea’s daughter) gets so excited to see andrew after months apart she runs and jumps on him

kevin has a 2-second heart attack, but andrew obediently picks her up and listens as she rambles on about watching him play on TV and how he’s the best goalie ever and she thinks he should have a statue-

neil gets better with them as they get older, he’s just easily overwhelmed by their energy sometimes and has no idea how to track all the different conversations happening around him

but all his friends know he loves their kids fiercely and they’re perfectly happy to send them on short trips with him to the grocery store for ice cream and such

they usually come back with more than that because the kids figure out they just have to look at neil with big eyes and he’s like “ok yeah we can get a whole sheet cake, too”

“neil what the fuck” “dan, he said it’s your birthday” “neil i know you know when my birthday is”

when they’re little, the best thing neil can do is play a very toned down version of exy with them in the backyard when they all get together

this is especially good with allison’s mansion because there’s so much space, and she always has a table of snacks and drinks waiting off to the side that nicky just stands by and continuously eats from

all the parents have photos of neil teaching their kids how to hold rackets or pointing at the goal and gesturing while their kids stare up at him adoringly

andrew always watches because the sight of neil josten, fastest player in the us major leagues, taking tiny steps so as to not outrun a six year old is probably the best thing in the world

when allison’s youngest comes out as trans, andrew switches to calling her ashleigh and using the right pronouns immediately and without a hitch

aaron and katelyn end up having kids a bit later than everyone else, but surprise surprise they’re twin girls

it is no secret they are andrew’s favorite and no one is mad about it

they have the same blonde hair and they’re so small and fragile and he would set the world on fire for them

it brings him and aaron closer together, too

the girls are good at telling them apart, but sometimes one of them will go “daddy?” and andrew replies “try again” without missing a beat

they pick it up! aaron will be tired after a long day of doctoring and mix them up and they’ll say “try again” 

andrew is amused

whenever renee’s son spends time in the hospital or is at home on bed rest, andrew will send him long, handwritten letters about anything and nothing at all

no one else knows about the letters, but they make renee cry

when the kids get older and start their Angsty Teenage Years, they turn to aunt allison and uncle andrew to be angry

andrew’s apathy helps, because sometimes you just need someone to listen and let you feel things

one time amalia randomly calls andrew in a rage about how “dad is so obnoxious sometimes, oh my god, i cannot stand him and i’m outside right now because i just need space and i know everyone says i have to be patient with him but-” 

“you’re absolutely right, he’s an asshole”

it makes her stop frustration crying to laugh, then she’s quiet for a while, and then she says she’s going to go back in and talk to her dad

a while later kevin is visiting and talking about a terrible screaming match and the heart-to-heart they had after and he thinks he said something that was meaningful and got through to make her apologize

he doesn’t get why neil finds it so funny, he is actually a very wise and thoughtful father thank you very much

neil takes putting up the kids’ drawings on the fridge very seriously and andrew has to assure him they will not be hurt if the corner of someone else’s paper is covering theirs

neil also always agonizes over gifts, he’s so afraid of buying things they don’t like

sometimes andrew finds him just standing in front of the calendar where all their birthdays are neatly marked, frowning like he’s analyzing another team’s stats

andrew usually ends up doing all of it because it makes neil way too stressed

one of aaron’s girls gets a boyfriend in her junior year of high school that actually ends up cheating on her

it’s sad but she says it’s not that big of a deal because she wasn’t in love with him and she’s always been very mature about these things

after a healthy cry with katelyn she gets up and jokes about calling uncle andrew because that’s what all her “cousins” do when they’re in crisis

yes all the kids call each other cousins because they’re that close

aaron, who’s cooking dinner, thinks “aw that’s cute”

but then he realizes

and he flings himself into her room shrieking “nO NO DO NOT DO NOT TELL UNCLE ANDREW”

andrew, from the phone: “don’t tell me what”

aaron retreats, accepting his role in a possible crime, but he hovers out in the hall to listen in

there seems to be too much laughter for murder, so aaron prays it’s fine

the next day the girls return from school full of glee because someone slashed her ex’s tires right before dismissal!! no one knows who!! everyone is buzzing about it!!

“andrew did you really drive several hours to ruin some teenager’s car” “you don’t have any proof, and it was neil”

part 3 of my neil and the foxes headcanons coming soon! you can find them and more in the aftg headcanon tag on my blog :)

neil, andrew, matt, and kevin + pro league shenanigans

matt’s the first one to go pro (because he graduates first) and he is both extremely excited and extremely nervous

because by that point, the foxes are a UNIT and they already lost the girls and now matt is going and they know they’ll keep in touch but it’s still so scary

halfway through his first season, wymack and andrew drive the remaining foxes (neil, aaron, kevin, nicky) to surprise matt at one of his games

he finds them literally the moment he steps onto the court

out of a crowd of thousands

it probably helps that nicky and neil and aaron were screaming and waving and jumping up and down

and kevin was also featured on the big screen

matt stops the opposing team from scoring in the last second, securing victory, and in the middle of all the applause he points his racket at them

andrew and kevin are the next to sign on to a team, but they’re states apart from each other

they still find time to occasionally meet up and constantly talk on the phone

but on the court it’s all hostility

more like kevin’s hostile and andrew calmly flips him off or just puts his gloved hands over his helmet like he’s covering his ears

neil doesn’t miss a single one of their games, and abby sends the foxes photos of him watching one of kevin’s games vs one of andrew’s

kevin’s game: *pure concentration, mentally taking notes, very serious*

andrew’s game: *HEART EYES*

a video goes viral of kevin doing post game press and matt popping his head in the doorway to interrupt

“hey, kevin!!” “yes?” “just wanted to say i love you :)” 

*deep, deep sigh* “i love you, too”

that’s when the internet gets to see kevin’s Press Smile turn into his Real Smile

another video also goes viral of andrew and matt sitting on a panel together and andrew, blank faced, leans over to whisper something in matt’s ear

he almost falls over because he’s laughing so hard

the moderator is like “what did he say??” and matt’s still incoherent while andrew replies “i didn’t say anything”

neil is the #1 draft pick his senior year, and he signs to his first choice team

he’s a few hours away from andrew, so they see each other on the weekends and they’re out at that point and don’t care if people spot them together

not that they really cared beforehand, but now they have publicists and managers to answer to

there is one memorable interview where neil is asked “so, what’s the best thing about andrew?” and it’s clear they want some ~relationship gossip~

neil, who knows exactly what he’s doing: “where do i begin? he’s the best goalkeeper in the world. why? allow me to go through all of his player stats from the past 3 years-”

neil’s team is playing kevin’s and there is so much hype because they’re the top strikers in the US and they’re about to throw down

basically all the sport channels suddenly have to invest in a french translator because…they’re Shouting Very Furiously at each other

(in a cozy living room in LA, jean is cackling at the insults while jeremy demands he tell him now!! i don’t want to wait for the translations!!! kevin’s face is literally turning red!!!! TELL ME!!!!!)

afterward neil and kevin stalk over to each other and everyone collectively holds their breath for a fight but no, it’s just a “reluctant” hug

when neil and andrew face off, andrew does not allow him a single point. not one. 

some reporter: “considering he hasn’t managed to score all night, josten seems awfully happy” 

matt makes everyone play rock paper scissors with him during down times on the court (teams filing on, before leaving for halftime, etc)

one could say andrew doesn’t seem into it, but he takes off his gloves so he can move his fingers properly and it makes matt very happy

matt and neil get into full on WARS that stop the moment actual playing begins and resumes immediately when it ends

reporters like to ask them about what the victory tally is so far and they give very serious updates

kevin, who is the most competitive man alive, is torn between telling matt off for not focusing 100% and Needing To Win

he does both, but mostly the last one

their teams play each other at the championships, and at the end they’re like ok kevin won exy BUT who will win rock paper scissors????

matt uses scissors when kevin throws paper and kevin, from the other end of the court, screams “NO” and then keels over

the clip of matt kneeling by him, cry-laughing and trying to pet his hair while kevin bats him away, gets a 2 minute “here’s some positivity” segment on the evening news

at the end of the day, the boys have nothing but good things to say about each other, and they will absolutely destroy reporters to defend their friends’ honor 

the foxes + vlogging (heavily inspired by the vlogs of numerous women’s soccer teams)

edit: part 2 here!

the only reason why wymack allowed this was because neil asked

the only reason why neil asked is because nicky really wanted to and he would literally do anything for nicky

so on the foxes’ official youtube channel that usually involves more serious stuff like recordings of post match press, mic’d up sessions, etc there are now playlists for “team vlogs” 

the internet goes CRAZY over them, like people who aren’t even that into exy watch them just for the shenanigans and friendship

all the foxes can contribute their own footage, but for certain vlogs the cameras are “officially” passed off to specific people

nicky, allison, and matt are basically pro youtubers with their commentary and lighting and holding of the camera while walking

“hey guys!! welcome back to another foxes vlog” “don’t forget to hit that like button and subscribe for more chaos” “drop a comment down below who pulls off the orange better, me or neil (but we all know it’s me)” 

renee just adorably narrates everything and is super encouraging to everyone around her

“now we’re eating breakfast!” “excellent pass kevin!!” “this is allison, my girlfriend, she looks especially pretty today :)” “this is andrew, one of my best friends, he’s wearing the shirt i got him!”

*andrew, blank faced, uncrosses his arms to display the shirt*

neil and andrew rarely take over but when they do it is a constant stream of dry humor and roasting their teammates

“instead of resting bitch face, i propose resting aaron face, which is the expression one wears when you are short and bitter-” “FILMING PRIVILEGES REVOKED” “like i said, bitter-” 

kevin is way too Formal and Composed so they pair him up with dan, who just does whatever the heck she wants

“kevin, go stand by that fountain” “why?” “it looks nice go stand over there” “but this isn’t relevant to-” “kevin.” *cue kevin, awkwardly standing by a fountain while dan fawns over him like a total mom* 

he also films her being all captainy during practice and clumsily switches the camera to selfie mode to give a stoic thumbs-up

half of what aaron says is “katelyn told me this is what actual youtubers do so uh here you go” *very slow pans of the scenery*

but it’s mostly nicky and allison who host the vlogs, and they really have a knack for capturing the fun times

allison silently lets matt and neil into the girls’ hotel room at an away game and neil proceeds to wake dan up by just…tossing himself onto her sleeping body

when matt is tasked with waking kevin up on the bus, he takes a long muscle roller from abby’s bag and stands as far away as possible to gently poke him on the forehead while everyone else is wheezing

wymack is having a team meeting in a conference room while everyone is groggily picking at their continental breakfast but listening

except for the twins, who nicky zooms in on as they try to blind each other by reflecting the sunlight streaming in through the windows on their wristwatches

*aaron accidentally gets renee in the eye* *andrew accidentally gets dan in the eye* both of them simultaneously: “SWORDS AT DAWN”

both of them simultaneously: *trying to suplex each other for saying the same thing*

after a successful game the foxes (for once) don’t feel like getting shitfaced so instead they wander downtown to hit up food trucks

“neil, tell them what you have” “an akai bowl” “a what” “an akai bowl” “do you mean a-sai-ee?” “that’s not the right pronunciation” “yes it is” “andrew says it’s akai” “oh my GOD-”

renee is filming for one of their gym days and she sets the camera up on various equipment to do her thing, but she always stops to smile into the lens and give a thumbs-up before running off

she captures matt and kevin’s “bro time” which is basically them spotting for each other on the bench press and chatting about their days

it’s the only way to get kevin to stop complaining about weights

allison hijacks the camera to show renee killing it with the pullups and then edits in a bunch of hearts all around her

no one knows why but there’s footage of nicky, dan, and neil running on the court in full gear during a water break to see who can jump and click their heels the best

wymack, abby, and andrew are holding up their fingers to score them

abby of course gives 10s to everyone, but wymack and andrew give dan and nicky 9s while neil gets a 0

there’s also footage from a team night in of all the guys getting their eyebrows plucked for the first time and reacting in various different ways

aaron, matt, nicky: “it really can’t be that-FUCK” 

kevin wordlessly claps a hand over his eye and falls back like he was shot

neil makes a face but is otherwise fine, andrew flatly states: “unpleasant”

whenever neil is sitting at his desk for an end-of-vlog debrief andrew is always on the couch or a beanbag behind him eating ice cream and occasionally interjecting with his own opinions

“so i think that we’re in good shape for next week, because we’ve all been taking really good care of our bodies, and i’m the biggest advocate of that-” *andrew stares into the camera*

the team does a few mukbangs and it’s half-talking and half-loudly trying to figure out where to pass the food/not knowing where their utensils went

they rope wymack in one time and he just keeps on trying to feed everyone else but in the most gruff manner possible

“neil, if you don’t eat a vegetable right now i’m benching you” *smacks nicky’s hand away from renee’s plate* *throws a spoon at matt* *inspects kevin’s food to make sure there’s no nuts even though there’s definitely not nuts*

no one takes responsibility but the ending frame of that vlog is wymack frowning with “#1 dad” in rainbow letters around his head

the foxes + vlogging part 2 (part 1 here)

andrew’s first time hosting a vlog begins with him sitting at his desk with a pint of ice cream, and he’s just eating in silence for a good 20 seconds until he finally speaks with a super calm expression

“welcome to another foxes’ vlog. in this installment, we are going to see exactly how much i can embarrass my teammates in the next 20 or so minutes.” *licking the spoon* “let’s begin.” 

it’s…not that hard

here are just a few memorable moments andrew so skillfully captured for the internet: 

the foxes, drunk in the living room, for some reason hysterically shouting/laughing about “NO NUT KEVIN” because of his allergy and kevin slurring/swearing at them in a mixture of both english and french

matt pulling him into his arms to comfort him and then going “it’s ok kevin we’re your nut defense squad” and kevin smacks him

the camera falls away when everyone else piles on top of them to apologize and “we wuv you kevvy!!!”

kevin, muffled: “that’s it that’s the last straw i quit JE DÉMISSIONNE”

the camera, hidden behind some cereal boxes, shows aaron quickly looking around before climbing onto the counter to reach something in the back of the bottom cupboard shelf

he scrambles back down just as nicky is walking in

wymack is giving them a lecture about proper nutrition in the lounge after practice and everyone is so sweaty and out of it, and it’s all the usual

“remember, you can have too much of a good thing” *looking at neil* “so don’t you morons go around thinking you can exist solely off of watermelon or some shit like that-”

neil proceeds to produce a jar of pickles out of fucking nowhere and loudly pops the lid off to casually drink the juice

“nEIL FOR FUCK’S SAKE-” “but coach, it’s not watermelon”

renee, partly for damage control (“damage to what?” “our collective egos”) is the next to host

“welcome to another foxes vlog! in this installment, we are going to see exactly how much fun content i can get :) let’s start!!”

cut to footage of andrew and renee sparring in a boxing gym that they are frequent visitors of

andrew and renee are kinda beating the shit out of each other (renee is winning. she’s always winning.) while casually chatting the whole time

andrew, throwin a brutal punch: and that’s why everything cherry flavored is an abomination

renee, dodging and knocking his feet out: understandable, but have you considered cough syrup is what we all associate it with and that’s why it’s ruined for us-

the foxes are at an airport at some ungodly hour and renee zooms in on the row of seats where kevin and dan have their heads on matt’s shoulders and all three are asleep

neil, totally out cold, has his body stretched out over their laps with his head on andrew’s

nicky, aaron, and allison are across from them, all sharing an abundance of starbucks pastries and helping aaron study for a big biology exam

the foxes start calling every single trip, even if it’s just to the grocery store, an “adventure”

because neil has associated just moving in general with life or death scenarios and they want him to start finding joy in everything

renee captures allison poking her head in the door and shaking her car keys saying “hey, neil, adventure”

neil, perking up and shoving his textbook away: “adventure?” 

the foxes go grocery shopping together and it’s one of the activities that displays their dynamic the best

dan, nicky, and aaron are all methodically going through coupons and discussing how to get the most bang for their buck

matt and allison are lovingly interrogating neil and kevin on what snacks/foods they’ve never had before and then carefully selecting stuff they think they’ll like and tossing it into the cart

“kevin, between these two flavors which appeals to you more?” “why would i ever put something in my body with an ingredient list that long” “ok we’re taking cool ranch” 

andrew is sitting in the cart and contributing absolutely nothing while renee pushes it and films

nicky is hosting when the foxes do a promotional shoot for merch and everyone’s having fun because they gave them free food and they genuinely like this year’s clothes

the producers are taking candids and also arranging them and before every outfit change they kindly ensure they’re all comfortable with what they’re wearing

aaron is both horrified and mesmerized by the girls curling their eyelashes and he allows renee to gently do his so he can send katelyn a picture

andrew: *pretends to gag in the background*

matt and dan are putting on the fox paw crop tops that allison helped design and kevin’s like “hm can’t believe i’m going to model that” 

“you don’t have to-” “no i’m gonna” 

matt is filming in the bus on the way to an exy banquet and wymack, who’s looking very smart and dignified in a suit, is just absolutely tearing into nicky and neil about something they did to the official team twitter

matt turns the camera around to say: “the duality of man” 

he turns the camera back around, and zooms in on a very unbothered neil, who notices his attention and has the audacity to wink

the foxes at the olympics headcanons because this is how i cope (also i know nora has a whole blurb about this but i kinda just went with what i thought of in my head, pls don’t attack me)

the olympics the year they qualify are in paris

neil passed through there several times with his mom, so it’s a weird experience, but andrew is there to silently remind him he doesn’t have to run anymore and he has every right to be here

kevin becomes a whole other level of intense so they have that to distract/annoy them

neil wants to go look at the food market in the olympic village but kevin insists they must practice on their own time

“kevin there’s no fucking room china’s in there right now” 

andrew gives him a look and kevin shuts up, so they force him to break from his ridiculously structured diet and sample some international food for a night

neil really really likes the korean dumplings but he doesn’t want to ask for more so andrew just…shovels the rest onto a plate and slaps it down in front of him

kevin is too silent eating his crepe so they assume he likes it more than he can admit

i think it’s pretty widely agreed in fanon that the three of them wear their orange bandanas under their US court helmets

andrew becomes a legend when he scores a point by striking the ball back with all of his might and it lands in the upper right hand corner of the opposite goal 

neil has a really aggressive mark at some point so he pulls out all the stops in the last minute to fake him out with raven footwork and speed, score, and then watch him stumble embarrassingly onto the ground

neil takes his helmet off, tucks it under one arm, and looms over him with his “try me bitch” face

it becomes a meme instantly

when kevin meets other athletes or does press he’s all polite manners and charming smiles, and these top-notch athletes are kinda enamored with him

they have heard so much about the legendary trio from a large state school in south carolina

then they see them in practice and neil bounces a ball really hard off kevin’s helmet because he’s being snobby about a drill and then kevin grabs his racket and holds it up way over his head while andrew watches in secret amusement

other olympians have heard a lot about the whole moriyama scandal and the foxes and they’re really curious about it

italy’s goalie remarks that neil’s “self-preservation skills must be-”

“nonexistent?” andrew doesn’t even look up from his food

the US court makes it to the final round for gold and kevin pulls his “i’m Kevin Day card” to get VIP family seats for all the other foxes and the three adults who kept them alive

andrew makes an insane save and while the crowds are going crazy, he sees aaron jumping up and down and screaming “that’s my brother!!”

(over the years they manage to get along and care about each other in a normal-ish way, although they’ll never be what they could’ve been had their parents been good people and they stuck together)

andrew’s so caught off guard he doesn’t even realize his teammates are swarming him until neil asks him if he’s okay and he nods silently

the focus and drive he brings to the rest of the game is beyond anything he has ever mustered up

of course they win, with kevin scoring the last point

while his teammates rush to him he removes his helmet and points his racket up at the sky for kayleigh

then kevin sprints to the stands where his friends and family are and neil jumps onto his back like a little kid

andrew stands beside them calmly but there’s the slightest smile on his face

the camera zooms in because kevin starts fumbling with his glove? on his left hand? and all the foxes are starting to freak because he might’ve injured himself-

he tugs out a small rectangle and the camera zooms in even more to show it on the big screen and if the crowds weren’t losing it already they lose it even more

it’s a photo of them crowding all around neil right after andrew smashed riko’s forearm (he’s out of frame)

you can see neil’s bent head and dan holding his face and everyone else shielding them protectively, but what no one else remembers is how kevin put himself between them and riko, his back to his former abuser like a barrier, his racket on the ground forgotten and his arms around nicky and aaron

despite the violence that ensued just seconds before, the captured moment is so sacred and loving and safe

and kevin, who is smiling the widest anyone has ever seen him in public, points at it and mouths “for us”

nicky sobs because “i knew he has feelings!!!” while erik rubs his back

neil peels off his gear to fish his own copy out of his armband and looks down at andrew expectantly

andrew’s face is flat but he pulls his out of his armband and holds it up between his fingers like it’s a cigarette

the pictures were neil’s idea (which is the only reason why andrew agreed)

a photo of the three of them holding up their snapshots makes the front page of the newspaper the next morning

eventually neil jumps down from kevin’s back and runs up to the stands, where matt and wymack haul him up so they can all hug him

neil looks at wymack to thank him but he cuts off and blurts “are you CRYING?!” 

wymack’s been holding it together up until that moment but a few tears finally escape

“shut up josten you need a shower”

wymack eventually splits off and kevin pulls himself up, the cameras capture the moment wymack leans in, but his hand is cupped over kevin’s ear so they can’t read his lips

in an interview afterward reporters are talking to him about it and they’re telling him how he’s the greatest exy player ever to live and all kevin says is

“i couldn’t have done it without my dad”

Team USA hosts an after party at a fancy outdoor restaurant with a massive garden and fairy lights

kevin, of course, gets absolutely sloshed and walks around shaking people’s hands while holding an expensive ass bottle of irish whiskey

renee follows with her arm looped through his just to make sure he doesn’t do anything illegal or especially humiliating

neil and andrew are sitting together, holding hands under the table

they watch their former teammates and current teammates dance and party and neil just can’t quite believe any of it

the gold medal on his chest is heavy but in the best way and he keeps on rubbing it with his fingers because “is this really mine?” 

he doesn’t just mean the medal

“no, neil, it’s actually argentina’s”

neil only smiles and lets his head rest on andrew’s shoulder because he’s tired and he’s always so solid

“700%”

more long headcanons! the foxes and their victory trip

after everything is sorted out with the ravens and the moriyamas, the foxes are finally free to do what they want

allison wants to give neil complete control over choosing where they go, because no one else really cares and they just want to be together

but neil is very indecisive and overwhelmed with friendship and relief

renee puts a world map up over a bulletin board and she hands him some darts and tells him to throw it blindfolded and see what happens

andrew ties his bandana over his eyes and they all wait behind them

first one lands in the ocean, then alaska, then japan

neil tries to see the last one but andrew yanks the bandana back down and everyone else is shrieking “nO! IT’S FINE!! KEEP THROWING!!!”

he’s a bit flummoxed by their strong response but okay

his sixth and last dart lands on hawaii

nicky is practically vibrating with excitement and aaron has to force him to cool it because it’s on neil and everyone knows he has a thing against the beach, they don’t know why but they won’t ask

neil thinks for a moment and allison almost plucks the darts out to try again, but he gives a little nod and follows her out to call sarah

in the hall neil describes what he thinks would be good, and it’s the complete opposite of everything he associates with his mother’s death

allison repeats it all perfectly to sarah, then shows photos to neil again a couple hours later to confirm he’s alright with it

andrew gives him a look when he asks if he’ll be okay flying for that long so neil drops it

next week they’re all heading to the airport, with a surprisingly willing kevin because he is also overwhelmed with freedom and still high on their win and the season’s over so why not?

it is, to no one’s surprise, a clusterfuck

getting to texas is fine, even with allison’s small mountain of luggage and everyone being too afraid to ask andrew about his knives but he somehow gets through just fine

this false security will be their downfall

they have two hours to walk around until they can catch their flight to honolulu

aaron’s on the phone with katelyn and dan takes a video of him grinning and leaning against the window while he listens to her

matt makes smoochy noises and aaron flips him off

neil, nicky, kevin, and andrew all go off in search of food

it just so happens that there are exy fans by a mcdonald’s and kevin gets swarmed

he puts on his Press Face even though he was literally just shouting at nicky about ancient greece

“no they weren’t just gay, nicky!! there was certainly homosexuality but there was philosophy, too!!”

the fans ask him about riko’s “suicide” and the investigation into the ravens, but before he can have a panic attack dan calls them to frantically say the gate has changed and they have thirty minutes to get there

half an hour would be a lot to anybody but to this dysfunctional family that’s absolutely nothing

except no one can find neil? he somehow slipped past andrew?

they sprint back to where the upperclassmen are and they’re all freaking out because what if it’s another mafia thing and they’re not finished with him-

andrew won’t let anyone get security involved and of course neil’s phone is off and they’re now calling wymack out of desperation

with five minutes left before they have to be at their gate, neil finally shows up and they’re all like BRO

he stands in confusion while the girls pat him down for injuries and andrew just barely manages not to punch him

then they finally notice what he’s holding and he presents steaming hot paper bags from auntie anne’s

“i wanted to get us pretzels, but andrew doesn’t like the salt or plain ones, so i had to wait for the cinnamon sugar ones. and the line was really long.” 

everyone’s just staring at him

“i also asked them to put extra cinnamon sugar”

more silence

then there’s a warning call for the flight and there’s no time to yell at him so they’re all scrambling to get to the new gate

andrew just grabs neil by the hoodie and drags him along

it takes a good hour before everyone can truly calm down on the plane

kevin and aaron try to order vodka but renee silently puts a pretzel in their hands

aaron: “i hate this fucking family”

dan takes a selfie of all of them to send to wymack and abby

andrew is furious about what neil did and neil feels bad so he just holds his hand for the whole flight under a blanket

when they land they’re all super disoriented so they go straight to the massive beach house allison has gotten them

it has its own private stretch of sand and a big porch and the water is so clear and blue

matt and aaron repeatedly dunk kevin while andrew and neil watch from where they’ve set up folding chairs

“ANDREW AREN’T YOU GOING TO DO SOMETHING?” “no, i don’t think i will”

they take surfing lessons and poor matt is too tall to really get the hang of it but neil…neil is amazing

neil’s really got an excellent set of abs and he may be small but he’s very in tune with his body

andrew refuses to get on a surfboard because he prefers watching neil anyway

nicky, renee, dan, and matt LOVE laughing at their white friends and the absolutely terrible sunburns they develop

except for allison, who has somehow tanned beautifully

wymack’s phone gets spammed with photos of neil just like trying to eat his breakfast or sit on the sand but his cheeks and nose are bright pink and it’s kinda adorable

they play drinking games and go on hikes and one night neil falls asleep on andrew and nicky snaps a sorta blurry photo

andrew somehow manages to swipe nicky’s phone, send it to himself, and then delete the evidence

they stroll around the touristy areas to watch the hula dancing and window shop and eat shaved ice

on their last night, they set up a little bonfire on the beach and sit around

neil tells them this is his favorite trip he’s ever taken

wymack frames a photo of them throwing neil into the water and puts it up on the wall by their trophy

the foxes + getting invited on a tv baking competition for charity (yes this was inspired by gbbo yes there is no reality in which this would even happen and yes i decided to make one)

the way the show works is each of the foxes picked a charity to represent, and the audience can donate to any of them while watching through a link

but the winner will also be given $10,000 for their specific organization at the end

all the foxes get their own work station, and they are not allowed to sabotage/otherwise interfere with each other but they may help/encourage if they so choose

their challenge is: make an elaborate three-tiered cake with at least three different flavors, and it has to be exy themed

the cameras float around to get comments from the foxes as they start getting to work

people that are here to have fun and maybe win: nicky, renee, matt

people who are here to win: allison, kevin, aaron, dan

people who are just here: neil, andrew

neil, immediately: “i am, as the kids say, lost in the sauce” 

kevin feels the same but he’d never admit that out loud so he’s just frowning down at the hyper organized 10-page packet he prepared with the recipe and incredibly detailed diagrams

allison is running around in sky high stilettos and somehow making it work

the cameras keep on zooming in on them because it’s just so impressive and she bends down to look into the lens and say “i know they’re nice (they’re jimmy choo) but you know what’s nicer? my caramel buttercream” 

the producers ask nicky how he’s planning to capture the exy theme

“my first thought was my flavors should be blood, sweat, and tears but that, like, won’t taste good at all” 

renee is totally in her element, humming a little to herself and gently encouraging her friends while they lose their minds

she’s describing her cake with great detail and all matt has to say about his is “it’s gonna be sweet, i guess” 

dan and matt keep on helping each other even though they kinda shouldn’t be and they know they shouldn’t be but it’s literally just such a reflex for them at this point in their relationship

matt stretches out on his stomach on the ground by the oven, ankles crossed, singing “please bake well please bake well please-” “babe you have decorations to make” “oh wait you’re so right”

kevin, to the cameras: “dan just let matt borrow her vanilla extract, they should be disqualified” *five seconds later* “neil can i have that spoon-” 

neil: “no <3” 

aaron is a 5 foot tall ball of stress and competitiveness and he is whisking up a meringue like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do

what is andrew doing during all of this? reading his recipe, following it, doing what you do when you make a cake, completely ignoring everyone else but also antagonizing them as much as possible

andrew, with sarcasm: “you can do it, aaron!” 

aaron, with spite: “i cannot do it, thanks”

*neil stares into the camera*

nicky burns the top layer of one of his cakes but he can’t find his knife so he panics and that’s how he ends up trying to saw through it with scissors while matt guides him even though he literally has a knife

it’s….not a very even slice

(andrew snatched nicky’s knife while he was walking to the fridge, no one noticed)

dan is making an exy helmet out of rice krispy treats because “that’s how they do it on cake boss” 

neil has very fine motor skills and very steady hands so he’s piping icing like he’s been doing it his whole life and everyone is so jealous

allison burns her finger trying to make ganache and renee drops everything to go check on her and make sure she’s okay and they’re being so cute and disgustingly in love

andrew, slapping globs of frosting all over his cake: “losers” 

neil, cuts his finger while shaping fondant: “ow” 

andrew, teleporting over: “you IDIOT-”

matt tells kevin his cake is burning even though all his cakes are out of the oven and currently being assembled but he still freaks out anyways

the five minute warning is given and several people scream at the exact same time for the same amount of time

aaron: “we have to stop spending time with each other” 

all of the foxes manage to finish a cake (or something resembling one) and present it to the judges

people whose cakes taste and look good: renee, andrew, aaron

people whose cakes look good: allison, neil, kevin

people whose cakes taste good: matt, dan

people whose cakes are neither: nicky (he tried his best)

renee designed her cake so that all the layers have been covered in a super artsy collage of rackets, jerseys, helmets, and PSU foxes flags, so she wins

the producers decide to include some “candid footage” as the credits are rolling, and it’s all the foxes trying each other’s cakes before the crew cleans up

andrew takes tiny bites of everyone’s, but when he gets to renee’s he cuts a fat slice and she smiles at him

matt tries neil’s and he LOVES it and the cameras zoom in on matt gushing over it while neil beams up at him all proud and happy

here’s a lengthy list of neil+the foxes headcanons absolutely no one asked for

the foxes have always loved neil, but now that he’s no longer carrying the burden of his true identity around and starts slowly letting them in they love him even more

they quickly realize that andrew may be more deathly in his protectiveness but neil is basically a mother bear in a small man’s body

one game an opposing player gets pissy and smacks allison on the butt with their racket and says something condescending

allison, who could most definitely punch his nose in, doesn’t even have time to react because neil drops everything and ZOOMS across the court in .2 seconds

he barrels into the guy so hard they both go flying, but neil just smoothly rolls out of it and onto his feet like some kind of ninja

neil gets a few hits in before matt has to haul him up by the waist and throw him over his shoulder because if he doesn’t restrain neil then he would totally join in and as he carries him away 

neil has his middle finger up and is just screaming obscenities and taunts

the player ends up getting benched the rest of the game and then suspended

(all of this happens in mere seconds but slow mo clips of it go viral online)

there’s one notable long bus ride back after a hell of a game in which andrew leaves his usual seat at the rear because there’s a ridiculous commotion in front

everyone is crowding around cooing and snapping pictures because no one knows exactly how it happened

but neil, who loves curling up anywhere and everywhere, has somehow ended up stretched out over both matt and dan’s laps

his upper body is on matt’s lap, his head nestled in matt’s balled up sweatshirt, and his legs are bent over dan’s

all three are totally knocked out and apparently comfortable because neil is, indeed, their child

nicky and allison furiously tweet photos and even aaron looks amused

no one notices andrew silently taking a picture in the background

the idea to buy a gift for abby on mother’s day is actually neil’s idea

a lot of the foxes have more than complex relationships with their mother, but everyone readily agrees and they even rope wymack in

nicky stumbles into abby’s office and does an excellent job of being an emotional mess and tearfully asks if they can go back to her house

when they show up, the kitchen is covered in her favorite flowers and everyone has pitched in to make a brunch feast 

at the end it comes out that it was all neil’s idea, and when she goes over to thank him, neils bows his head like an expectant cat so she can plant a kiss

there may have been tears

neil tells everyone about his “count to 10″ deal but how he usually loses it before he can even get halfway

so now whenever neil’s doing press, the team play this game where they guess what number he snaps on 

a reporter asks an insensitive question about last year and neil gets this look in his eye and dan’s like “three” but then matt goes “two” and neil takes a deep breath-

afterward he says it was one

neil begins dropping snippets here and there of his life on the run and it makes everyone go absolutely FERAL

like his life has been so hard and they just want to love him and protect him and make him feel safe

nicky drags him on another shopping trip and renee and andrew end up coming along

renee holds out a shirt to him and says “i know it’s a lighter color than usual, but the fabric is thick enough” and sticks her hand under the collar to demonstrate

neil has his Someone Is Being Nice To Me face and because he stopped functioning andrew grabs it and tosses it into the cart

then there’s a team dinner out and they get a long table and without a word aaron, who looked like he was going to sit at the head with his back to the wall, pauses and then stands aside so neil can take it

it takes him two tries to get a “thank you” out

when they’re in crowded places, neil still gets really uneasy, so andrew uses himself as a slight battering ram to clear the way and renee will link her arm through neil’s so he feels anchored

neil makes an absolutely impossible goal, like of historic proportions, and kevin lifts neil off his feet in a bear hug while beaming

kevin may be the hardest on neil, but he’s also the proudest, because neil has given him so much more than just his game

nicky’s mouth is so wide open aaron uses his racket to close it

i could go on forever and probably will! so pt. 2 is coming soon

edit: part 2 here now!

domestic andreil

andrew adopted sir and king when it was still just him in the apartment, but when neil moves in, they very quickly become attached

so attached, in fact, that neil is both flattered and really weirded out because he never grew up around animals aside from strays that would just lurk in the same alleyways

occasionally andrew hears him saying things like “king, i do not like an audience while i am trying to pee, but you may wait outside” or “sir! sir! it’s fine! i’m just getting my water! i swear i’ll keep petting you right after just give me 2 seconds-”

andrew is an infinitely better cook than neil and neil kinda loves it?? their only memories of homecooked meals are tainted for obvious reasons and it’s so nice being able to make new ones

they try out recipes together and learn as they go and sometimes they skype with the other foxes while they cook

(also andrew makes a KILLER lasagna)

grocery shopping together is their ~thing~

andrew knows whenever neil’s really closely inspecting something that he’s never had it before, and he usually plucks it out of his hand to put in the cart without a word

neil “tries” to stop him from buying an ungodly amount of sweets

they are coupon fiends partly to save money but partly because it’s just really fun for some reason?? it’s also a good way to try new foods because they happen to be on sale or included in a buy 1 get 1 free

THEY GO TO THE FARMERS’ MARKET EVERY SUNDAY

neil loves fruit and supporting local businesses so they become regulars and all the vendors know them by name and everything

the sports paparazzi try springing up to catch pda but like……all they see is neil engaging in enthusiastic conversation about the current season of pears while andrew buys a caramel apple for some random child

neither of them are the decorating type, but the apartment is filled with framed photographs of their friends and travels

their psu jerseys are both framed and hang side by side <3

neil frequently just stares at the photos for nostalgia but also because “hey do you remember that gelato store on campus?” or “i miss nicky’s laugh” or “wymack isn’t even trying to look upset here” 

and andrew will say something like “you can still hear nicky laugh over the phone” or “we have ice cream in the fridge”, but neil catches him staring at the photos a lot, too

they routinely do housekeeping and people always marvel at how neat and tidy their house is

neil just really likes vacuuming what can he say

their sleeping arrangements change from moment to moment, but 99% of the time neil is the little spoon, because some days he still feels like he needs something at his back and what better thing than andrew?

andrew monologues to the cats a lot and they will literally just sit there, tails flicking, and listen

“four cloves of garlic or five?” *silence* “you’re absolutely right king, it’s five” 

“this frame doesn’t look straight” *meow* “no, sir, i’m not gonna move it to the left, what do you know about hanging pictures-” 

“if one of you bastards doesn’t come sit on my lap right now i am going to simply perish from the cold–not you, neil” “am i not a bastard” “you are an attitude problem with two legs, the cats are bastards”

matt is so convinced the cats are either a) capable of fully understanding human speech but don’t have the mouth biology to talk back or b) humans that were turned into cats and are begging for someone to save them

neil: “we buy them ass expensive wet food, they’re fine” 

they watch a lot of foreign films because of neil’s thing for learning languages and because of andrew’s memory he starts learning them, too

this is how they start speaking to each other in a mashup of english, german, russian, mandarin, and spanish

it sounds like they’ve made up their own language

there’s a little old lady that lives next door to them and they make sure to bring her food every week or so and just have a chat

she’s started watching exy because of them and is both very proud but very fretful for the state of their brains and bones

her name is blanche

her grandchildren are massive exy fans and they visit one day and see she has limited edition minyard and josten jerseys and they’re SIGNED????

“oh they’re just gifts from my neighbors, such nice boys” 

here have some quick andreil + halloween headcanons (inspired by this)

the foxes spam the groupchat with photos of each other’s decorations and costumes and activities

andrew and neil’s apartment sets up trick or treating so the kids can go down the hallways and to other buildings in the complex

neither of them really participated in halloween as kids, so they want to make into a thing just because they can now

they always have to buy a shit ton of candy because not only are there a lot of kids who come by, andrew eats most of it in the week leading up

he claims halloween is lowkey stupid but he spends 2.5 hours decorating their front hallway so the little kiddos can see it when they open the door

they carve jack o lanterns and neil always does a wonky fox that eventually gets less wonky over the years and andrew bounces around between spooky faces and just…carving out a giant shapeless blob

they get thing 1 and thing 2 costumes for the cats except it says “bastard 1″ and “bastard 2″ 

neil, every single year without fail, dresses up as kevin day and draws the jankiest looking chess piece on his cheek just so the groupchat gets the delight of an all-caps rage text 

“IT’S NOT EVEN ON THE RIGHT FUCKING CHEEK NEIL YOU OBTUSE FUCKING WALNUT” 

(dan almost peed her pants laughing at that one)

andrew slaps two different pairs of cat ears on and very seriously tells kids he dressed up like sir and king and they LOVE it

occasionally he’ll put in more effort, which means a white lab coat and glasses and a tag that says: “dr. aaron minyard”

when kids want to know who dr. aaron minyard is he tells them “the biggest nerd on the planet” 

aaron is torn between being infuriated and weirdly touched

andrew is really good with kids and it comes to him naturally, but neil has to try a little harder

one time a harried mom brings her three kids by their door, and the youngest is dressed like a black cat and freaks out when she sees king because it’s her twin!!

neil sits on the ground and holds him in his lap so she can pet him, and she’s so attached that she doesn’t want to leave and the mom and the older kids are getting kinda impatient

so neil tells the mom if she’s okay with it, he’ll remain sitting in the threshold of his apartment with her daughter standing out in the hall and she can finish up the row then come back

he spends ten minutes entertaining an extremely talkative five year old named gracie while she pets king, and he does a pretty great job

by the end of it gracie declares neil her “best friend” because no one else at school wants to be her friend and some kid named billy said her costume was “lame”

the mom comes back, profusely thanks neil, and then he and gracie part ways

neil, turning to andrew immediately: “i’m gonna throw hands with a five year old”

andrew: “i’m in”