I Miss Me - Tumblr Posts
I miss the days when I knew myself. I miss me.
EL
“I tried making my house prettier
for when I sink again.
I tacked starry lights in the darkest
corners of my room because maybe
they could light up the black
edges of my mind.
I rearranged every bit and piece
of furniture hoping I could
regain control of my thoughts
if they were in different places.
I dusted each surface and underneath
each knick-knack, vacuumed each
square foot four times to make sure
I got it, figuring that the gestures
would exhume my happiness--
maybe my old self--
but my mind hasn’t changed
and even my room is a stranger now.”
-EL
I kinda need it all to make sense already. My mind is running out of possible explanations.
I feel like no one listens to me. No one hears me. I might as well be invisible.
After so many people leave you start to question what’s wrong with you…
I hope I don’t lose you. I’m so sorry I couldn’t give you what you deserve. But I still love you so deeply. You’re my best friend and I want to see you happy and thriving. I hope I’m still next to you, cheering you on. God. I can’t lose you.
