Incorrect Twisted Wonderland - Tumblr Posts

Imagine:Pomefiore

Epel:*unwraps his gift from Vil* Huh? What's this s'posed to be?

Vil:Ehem. Well, it's a pair of gloves.Make sure not to soil them and I hope you find it of use.

~One Week Later~

Ace:Hey prefect, why's Epel wearing those fancy gloves? I thought he said he hated them...

Yuu:Well yeah, used to... *flashback to Epel slapping the shit out of a Savanaclaw member that made a your mom joke with said gloves*

Ace:Soo, you gonna tell me or not?

Yuu:... OK SO BASICALLY-

Yuu = God

Yuu: I learned some very valuable lessons from this. Ruggie: I’m guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should’ve taken away. Yuu: Death isn’t real, and I’m basically God.

Rules

Leona: Rules are made to be broken. Riddle: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken. Azul: Uh, piñatas. Malleus: Glow sticks. Vil: Karate boards. Yuu: Spaghetti when you have a small pot. Leona: Rules. Riddle:T

^this but poorly drawn cause I felt like drawing, but it’s also 5 am and I haven’t slept

Drawings below the cut

—Random School Game Show—

Host: And for your final question! Please identify this statue.

Ace: …Like are we supposed to know that??-

MC: *slaps buzzer* A 20TH CENTURY RENAISSANCE STYLE GOAT GARGOYLE-

Host: CORRECT!

Deuce: How could you have possibly guessed that?

MC: I attend all of Malleus’s Gargoyle Appreciation meetings.

Malleus: *from a distance within the crowd* YOU DO CAAAAAARRREEEEE!!!!

Crowley: How did the entire school find out?!

Yuu: I only told Ace and Deuce because they're my best friends.

Deuce: I just told Trey and Cater because they're our upperclassmen.

Cater: *has been livestreaming the entire conversation* and I told many, many people.

Malleus, mumbling: This cupcake is... spicy? It's supposed to be sweet, and it's not even fully baked.

Malleus: If I had to rate this, I would give it three-

Yuu: I baked it myself!

Malleus: -out of three stars. Child of man, this is the best cupcake I've ever had.

TWST Incorrect quotes#316 ...hE GOT the spIRIT

Lilia: Human’s like it when you’re mysterious~

Mal: Okay, got it

Later

Yuu: How’s your day been Mal-Mal?~*Smiles at him*

Mal: None of your goddamn business

EVEN more later...

Mal*Hidding under his blankets*...I made my human sad-

Lili:...Your just little confused but you got the spirit!~*Is trying to get him our with icecream,gargoyles and a plushie that looks like you*

...He really do be tryin-

Theater kid!Yuu: Okay, this year's cast for the first year's rendition of Peter Pan goes as follows. Ace, Peter Pan.

Ace: YES!

Theater kid!Yuu: Deuce, Lost boy because you don't have to remember your lines and still get to fight.

Deuce: Thank the Seven.

Theater kid!Yuu: Jack, Captain Hook.

Jack: Sure.

Theater kid!Yuu: Ortho, Wendy.

Ortho: I'm a star!

Theater kid!Yuu: Epel, Tinker Bell.

Epel: What no! Why do I have to be Tinker Bell?! Make Ortho Tinker Bell!

Theater kid!Yuu: You're Tinker Bell because Vil bribed me with an upgrade to our costume and prop budget. He also already has your costume ready.

Epel: That's corruption!

Theater kid!Yuu: It's showbiz, every child star as an overbearing narcissistic parent making deals for them. Be grateful It's Vil and not a real monster. Sebek, you are the crocodile.

Sebek: I will not! I'll bearly be in the show.

Theater kid!Yuu: Unless you want to be Mr.Smee I'd shut up and put the costume on. I paid for it with Epel's pride.

Yuu: Tell us, is there other spirit in this dorm?

Ouija board: Y-E-S

Grim: Great, your portion of the rent is 1000 madols. It's due the first of the month.

Ouija board: W-T-F

Twisted wonderland Incorrect quotes #13

MC: *talking to the first years*My future partner must be smart,strong, brave, organized

Idia: *On the floor crying cause Ortho forced him to go outside and he hates it*

MC: That one, i want that one 

—Random School Game Show—

Host: And for your final question! Please identify this statue.

Ace: …Like are we supposed to know that??-

MC: *slaps buzzer* A 20TH CENTURY RENAISSANCE STYLE GOAT GARGOYLE-

Host: CORRECT!

Deuce: How could you have possibly guessed that?

MC: I attend all of Malleus’s Gargoyle Appreciation meetings.

Malleus: *from a distance within the crowd* YOU DO CAAAAAARRREEEEE!!!!

Twst quotes #04

Yuu: In terms of money, we have no money.

-

Cater: Croissants: dropped.

Kalim: Road: works ahead.

Floyd: BBQ sauce: on my titties.

Idia: Shavacado: fre.

Yuu: Miss Keisha: fuckin' dead.

Leona:

Leona: … I didn't understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

-

Ace: Can you see it? Where Yuu slapped me?

Deuce: Your face looks like a don't walk signal.

Sebek: Your face looks like a photo negative for the hamburger helper box.

Jack: A palm reader could tell Yuu's future by looking at your face.

Epel: The phrase "Talk to the hand 'cause the face ain't listening" doesn't work for you, because the hand is your face.

Ace: A simple "Yes" would work.

-

Idia: We've been conducting an ongoing study to see what Grim will and will not eat.

Yuu: Grass? Yes!

Idia: Moss? Yes!!

Yuu: Leaves? Ohh, yes!

Idia: Shoelaces? Strange but true!

Yuu: Worms? Sometimes!

Idia: Normal rocks? Usually nah.

Yuu: Twigs? Usually!

Idia: Lilia's cooking? Inconclusive!

Azul: How did you… test this?

Idia: You just hand him stuff and say "Eat this" and if he eats it, he eats it.

Azul: … I don't know how to feel about this.

Ace: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

-

Crowley: I still don't have a new year's resolution.

Crewel: You could take care of the overblots.

Yuu: You can get me home.

Sam: Don't be such a bitch.

Crowley: Okay DAMN, SHIT.

Twst quotes #06

Grim: Do you ever think? Because I don't.

-

Yuu: I'd like to live through a week that's not a whole new verse of "We Didn't Start the Fire."

-

Yuu, on the phone: So no head?

Yuu: *Breaks Crowley's phone and mask*

-

Ace, dangling from a rope over a pit of fire: Remember when I said I'd tell you when we're in too deep?

Deuce:Yes?

Ace: We're in too deep.

-

Yuu: If I die you can have what little I own.

Jamil: Wait. What do you mean "if" you die?

Yuu: My unending existence is fuelled by pure spite, that of which the painful experiences of life have rendered me full.

Jamil:

Jamil: *Sighs* Let me call Professor Crewel.

Twst incorrect quotes#07

Ace: Alright Deuce, Epel. Let's go over this one more time.

Ace: If something breaks?

Deuce: We try to fix it before Yuu gets home.

Ace: If it doesn't work?

Epel: We blame Grim.

Grim: Seriously guys, what the hell?!

-

Vargus: Why are you like this??

Yuu: I used too much "No More Tears" shampoo as a kid and I haven't felt a single emotion since.

-

Kalim: I'm cold.

Jamil: Here, take my hoodie.

*meanwhile*

Ace: I'm cold.

Yuu: I can't control the fuckin' weather, Ace.

-

Riddle: How was your day, Ace?

Ace: Yeah, fine, it's anti-bullying week at school.

Riddle: Oh? And what does that mean?

Ace: It means I can't bully anyone for a whole week.

-

*The Squad is on the bus, and a child is crying*

Vil: *rolls eyes to the sky*

Lilia: *makes funny faces to get them to stop*

Jamil: *puts their earphones on at 100% volume*

Epel: *doesn't mind, doesn't bother*

Floyd: *is the reason they're crying*

Yuu: *enjoys in silence*

Twst incorrect quotes #11

Cater: Oh and for your information, I don't have an ego.

Cater: My Magicam banner photo is a landscape.

-

Yuu: Yeah, I don’t like people.

Crowley: Oh, well now that’s not fair Yuu. Have you met all of them?

Yuu: I’ve met enough of them. People. What a bunch of bastards! You're a perfect example.

-

*Yuu talking about their world*

Yuu: I’ve made a spread sheet of all the crime in Brooklyn.

Yuu: There’s so much crime in New York, no one should live there.

-

Azul, having recently lost his glasses: KILL THE BUG!!!

Idia: ....That’s a gecko—

-

*Yuu walking into the dorm leaders meeting*

Yuu: Sorry I'm late.

Yuu: I was doing…

Yuu: Stuff.

Azul: YOU PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!

Yuu: Yo, Azul!

Yuu: What kind of octopus are you?

Azul: Why..?

Yuu: I wish to know how edible you are.

Yuu: Happy Christmas bitches!

Yuu: Now, I can't give any of ya'll shit 'cause I be broke.

Yuu: For that I'm sorry. But I sure as HELL expect presents.

Yuu: Now I'm gonna go and hang with Tsunataro while you all freak out about how you didn't get me anything but, at like, the end of the day you somehow get me something and I'm gonna have to act like it's the best present in the world while knowing some of ya'll didn't do nothin while the rich ones get me something that's expensive, or just plain money in Leona's case. Don't worry about it though Ruggie, we broke besties.

Yuu: Shit. I went on a whole monolouge.

Merry Christmas ya'll, and happy birthday to Karma.

Yuu: Y'know I hate you, right?

Ace: You've been telling me that since we've met... Why?

Yuu: I just thought you'd look really pretty with long hair.

Ace: Why are you telling me this?

Yuu: 'Cause, if you somehow got really long hair I'd give you a pretty pass to being an asshole. I gave Deuce one already, he's not an asshole but he is stupid which I hate just as much.

Ace:

Ace: I'll go look for some spells.