Mustbetaisa - Tumblr Posts
“Friends”
Don’t ever let the words get
into your soul
Don’t ever let the poison spread
into our body
I know its hard and I know
there’s pain
But just let it wash away
Let just forget and began like it
was yesterday
For all I knew is that we used to
be friends
Now
Looking into your eyes is like
Looking to the stars
They say ‘I love you to the moon’
I would say ‘I love you to mars’
Now that we’re separated
I found myself
Shots in my mind like I
Cried for help
You made love look so easy
cause that’s all I feel
Then you make me believe
That love’s not real.
Bridge
He took her heart with such
gentleness
Like it had the weight of
a feather
he took her flying across
the sky
Painting in her face a
new smile
He promise her that he would
never break her heart
But instead he tore it
apart
At the end, she stood in the
bridge waiting for him
Tears running down her cheek
Remembering his last words
breaking a little more.
I love you, and I will love you until I die, and if there’s a life after that, I’ll love you then.
The Mortal Instruments, City of Glass
Timed Thoughts. Nightime
11:59pm
She was frustrated and she frowned rubbing her hand mindlessly over her face. She relocated her fallen glasses in front of her eyes and tried to focused on the words that were written on her open notebook. But slowly the words turn to gribbles and she suddenly banged her fisted against her desk where her computer was open and her cheeks started dripping tears. Her notebooks fell to the floor and she took her glasses fast slamming them against the wooden desk. She stood up from her blue chair rubbing repeatedly her tired arms over her ever aging face. Her knees then gave up and she fell feeling how her lung felt suddenly tight and hand trouble breathing. The standards were too high this time. She didn’t know how to meet them. Everyone expected her to ace the next trial, but she didn’t know how. It was foolish of her to be crying on the floor frustrated to accomplish an expectation she put over herself. But if she hadn’t done that how would other even give her another glance. She just was boring to the eyes of everyone. She grasped the foot of her bed and held it tight making her sit up. Everyone knew her because of it. Because of her beautiful works and her long explanations. That's why she even remembered. No one ever bother to get to know her. That’s why she loved so many books. They didn’t have any condition or expectation, but books wouldn’t save her this time. Around her eyes her skin became reddish and sobs escaped her mouth and she furiously banged her head against her mattress. Then remembering she wasn’t alone in her apartment she became silent letting the mattress go and forcing herself to sit on her blue chair. Delicately she picked her notebooks from the floor and placed them open on the last page she was. But she still couldn’t understand her own letter. The words would stay on her mind and she then failed. She knew that she wouldn’t to pass the test the way everyone expected and the way she wanted. She was hopeless. Gripping her forearms she started digging her nails into her own flesh feeling the sensation liberation. She rather feel physical pain that emotional. Her mind was far too weak to endure it successfully. Tears then came once again, but this time no sound came from her mouth. She bit her lips keeping them sealed. She glanced at her desk. Notebooks splattered, notes scattered and pens rolling; it was a mess just like her. Taking her glasses she started at them and then turned herself to face the mirror that was placed beside her desk. She was disgusted with herself even more than she constantly was. Her reflection gave the image of a girl who’s hair was taken out messily out of a bun and her face was detailed with red skin and her open arms gave the view of her bleeding scratches. She knew she wasn’t beautiful, but she thought that if she was at least the smartass that somehow made up for all her other faults, but she now knew she would never amount to anything important. She would live her life being the nightmare she always feared. She feared being unimportant, being forgotten as easily as she came. Everything was in a deathly quiet and her mind whispered dangerous ideas. Her hand gripped the glasses tighter making them break. Nonchalantly she picked one broken piece of glasses and pressed it against her forearms making a gash appear. The clock hand’s on her night stand slowly showed how the time passed and she found herself alone in the midnight and after taking a napkin she cleaned herself up. She erased any memory of ever having her breakdown. Smart girls didn’t make mistakes and if they did nobody ever truly knew. She would be a smart girl at least this time, at least this night. Sitting once again of her chair she took her notebook and started rereading the lines on her page making them somehow coherent. She would pass even if that drive her crazy. Because she was Taisa, she was the smart girl who was stupid enough to think that she come even scratch the top of perfection.
12:26pm
His poems
His words echoed through the room making it fall quiet. Everyone was there just to hear him. Him and his poetry. Everyone wanted to feel connected that's why they were there. But his poetry didn’t just bring the satisfaction of being understood, it also brought the relief of being able to fly through words. His comical answers made the heartbroken feel better and farther away from the pain they were trying to escape. The lovestruck enjoyed his writing resting their heads together with thin lips. And his deep poetry brought restless admiration for those who longed creativity. But no one was as bewildered as the girl who was on the first chair rested against the wall. How could he write so profound things in such little space she would never know. She laid her head on the armrest and let her mind drift with his voice. She was immensely glad that she had found him and his poetry. She didn’t know she needed it until she read it. It’s an ache that only your touch can soothe was the first of his writings she ever read. She had never known truer words. Her broken heart was slowly being fixing by his words. Lions was her favorite, but you couldn’t just have one favorite of his. His poetry could give you the strength that you needed any moment you could ask any person in the room present. The guy behind her knew just how much power his poetry had over people. Because he didn’t only talk about feelings of distraught, but of the moments you wouldn’t even describe because of how numbness had consumed your body. His favorite was The guise and end-chills and while his body was giving away to ache his mind stilled longed for his poetry. The poetry that would wrap around you as if it was a blanket protecting you from the cold and harsh reality. Yes! That’s why they were here. They were here because he could bring them peace and let their minds rest and made them fall in love with his verse. But he was done now, his poems were all read and now everyone had to wait for another time when he would stand up again in the closed alleyway and speak about unspoken feelings. He waited for them to leave, but slowly everyone got to their feet with teary eyes and started chanting. Thank you! They had to make him feel appreciated because that’s how they felt when he read to them. They felt special. They felt that they could cry their heart out and he would just wipe away their tears with his lyric, slowly and compassionately. They had to make him feel special because who knows what he was feeling. Then calmly everyone started leaving making the crowded room desert. Lastly, the couple rose from their seats and looked at him with eyes full of admiration and they wished he would write some day about the feeling f happiness. Because they wanted him to feel it they wanted him to be as full as everyone was when they heard his voice. But they wouldn’t worry, they knew he would find the one even though he would face heartbreak. They knew someday his heart would be held as the most valuable possession on Earth and they just smiled at him. Because even though he didn’t know it great things were about to happen to him. Happiness was his way and his poems would tell that tale.
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@jonaswpoetry you will someday amaze the world with your short, accurate poetry. You will resonate through the young generation’s, hearts and souls. Your words will connect with those broken and mend them and will find those who are lost. We have never met, but I hope that you are happy and have love in your life and I hope that your dreams come true.
And my heart was made out of paper and all you did was stand in front of me playing with matches in your hands and a smirk in your face
Timed Thoughts. 1:24am
because that's who I am, the person that you have until something better comes along
and I wish that leaving me wasn’t so easy for you
The hole in my chest is growing and I’m feeling empty. But I don’t call for you because your smile seems brighter father away from me than it was ever by my side. So I just close my mouth with hand in my chest and let you laugh because I like the way your eyes shine in the night even if it is because of the flames that’s eating my soul away.
life’s gifts
“exquisite isn’t it?” She felt him caressing her cheek in a swift movement “life i mean. it’s an incredible paradox. there is beauty in the most mundane of things.” He smiled and she felt her chest tighten “holding hands down the street. innocent laughs that leave you gasping for air. secret looks that have too much emotion.” His hand fell to his side and he took a step back, his eyes never leaving her face and he sighed. Suddenly memories filled her view. Blissful memories showing her the times she used to spend with her friends laughing at nonsense, the times she would blush and look away when she was caught looking at him although she wanted him to know and the times their shoulders would bump in the sidewalk and then somehow their fingers would found themselves in each other’s grasp. Things she never thought would ever stop being. And she remembered how much it hurt when they stopped. She realized she also loved the most mundane of stuff as well. “i believe those are the sweetest of gifts life can give you. and i aspire to realize and appreciate them before they are gone. because sometimes it’s just too late to realize you lost something you took for granted.” At last, all she saw was his shadow growing smaller as he walked away and she felt the lightest of tears falling down her cheek. Indeed life’s gifts were truly magnificent, it was as pity realization always came too late.
drifting
i want to tell you. i want to scream at you, shake your shoulders and explain why i am like this. i want you to understand why i feel this way but then i look up to your eyes and suddenly a rope is tied around my throat and i can’t speak. my hand begins to shake so i hide them behind my back and i drop my eyes to the ground because if i continue looking at you i might cry and i don’t want to break in front of you. i really don’t. i want to be as strong as you are, but my bones are made out of paper that are easily crumpled while yours are never bending iron. my heart races and i know you’re about to tell me something to encourage me, but i can’t hear it. i can’t tell you because it’s all in my head and i’m terrified of letting you in and finally seeing me through my eyes. i still want to be the happy girl you think i am because i don’t want to be a burden. so i swallow my breath and smile. because even though im not fine i still have you and somehow that makes it worth it. because in a world where my mind is slowly crumbling and where my thoughts are the only things keeping me up at night i wouldn’t know how to handle if you put any space between us. just the same way a boat would float away purposelessly if the rope tying it to the deck cuts lose. the boat would just drift away and i don’t want us to stop
my sun
I was angry at you for not caring enough but that anger never changed into hatred. And all I wanted to do was never to see your face again. However, you don’t hide from the sun forever as you are drawn to it by its light and your need for that light no matter how angry you were by it. And you were just that to me. The brightest star in my galaxy. And I needed you as much as I wanted to hate you.
summer solstice
Sunrays travel through the space of the universe
In order to touch earth who is never still.
The rays who are never yielding to the gigantic distance
between them and forever faithful to its ambition
of bringing warmth to earth.
The sun existing with the constant restraint of never
Being too close, for she would burn every ounce of life
of her beloved earth, and never being too far, for
she in her absence would freeze every
drop of life in him.
He who is always changing and always trying to forget.
The sun willing to live with that constant pain of
Being there, having only her rays barely
caress earth’s skin, whispering encouraging
words, making him strong against
Hate, ignorance, apathy, and intolerance.
Even though all she wants to do is embrace him
And never let him go.
Having time slowly slipping through her fingers,
Always yearning and dreaming of being able
to be with him and hold him.
However one day every year the earth looks at
Her and decides to stay still just for her.
Being as close as they could be for as long
He is able to.
So they stare at each other in full earnest
In what is for everyone else the longest day of the year.
And the earth remembers what’s like to be in love.
But no day is long enough for them, it never was and
It’ll never be.
The earth then continues to be the fickle constant in her
Universe, trying to obliviate the feeling of desiring something
He can’t have.
So they continue living, the earth sickly dying in bitterness
and the sun doomed to pass her time in loneliness
until she too ceases to be.
And even if there were others planets,
And even if he denied their feelings,
she would only always love one until
The end of her time.
- so whenever you think about loss and pain just remember that the celestials don’t get to escape despair either.
Her erratic breaths made a lovely melody accompanied by the city’s noise. Her weak knees pressed against the cold pavement did their best to kept her straight. Her once beautiful dress was now a dirty mess ripped to shreds that only reminded her of her despair. Her brunette hair which used to be braided was now loosely blown by the chilled air of the night. It hurt. Betrayal hurt. Shutting her eyes closed, she stood up and started walking aimlessly. Their taunting laughter still echoed in her head. Their empty eyes still followed her. Then she was at the museum. Their museum. Where they promised they would always be together. Where secrets were shared. Where she learned what love what suppose to be like. Or so she thought. The sound of a broken glass the startled her waking her up from her painful trance. “Princesa, what are you doing here? What happened at the party?” an old man asked leaning an oval shaped mirror against a wall. “Nothing abuelo, I’m just tired” she tried to lie, swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat. The wrinkle’s man face regarded her in concern, but when she turned away he sighed. “Just remember princesa, tu eres más fuerte que tus demonios.” Just when the door closed again she opened her eyes to confirm that she was alone. Suddenly she fell to the ground letting cries escaped her mouth. How could she be so naive? Lifting her face from a shield her hands had created she saw the reflection of the mirror shone in the darkness. Whimpering she dragged her body to the wall and took the mirror in her trembling hands. Upon seeing the image reflected she stayed in silence before letting a scream fueled by hatred. So under the gaze of the city that never sleeps she swore that they would never hurt her again. That they would pay. She would make them pay for what they had done. Because after all, she was stronger than her demons.
Little white flower
In the middle of winter, a curious boy wonders into the woods. And footprints he leaves while making his way through the snow. But in the distance, he sees a little white flower, almost missing it by the way it blended with the scene. Wanderlust, he walks towards it intrigued by what he thought was a rare plant. A frozen lake surrounds it. With careful steps, the boy tries to get close to the exquisite beauty. So little by little, the boy gets close and the flower blooms as much as it can with the warmth the boy providing. The type of warmth it yearned for. Admiring an enigma the boy’s eyes never left the plant, but with every second he passed with said flower he realized that there wasn’t anything about it truly amazing.Nothing that made him feel something.However while captivated by the site the ice cracks beneath him and he falls into the frozen water. Hurriedly he climbs out trying to remain conscious. Upon seeing the flower again his gaze changes from one of complete admiration and curiosity to one of complete abhor. How could he ever risk his life for something like that? He asked himself in frustration and anger. It isn’t even pretty, maybe not knowing what it truly was made it intriguing but nothing more. He felt nothing. And just as he quickly as he came he left.
And maybe that’s why you left. Maybe that’s why everyone leaves eventually. Because I’m not a poetic disaster that enamours those around it with my flaws. Because I’m not a bewitching lotus flower that has grown in the most unexpected of places. I just happen to be the one that is never enough.
The difference between your church and mine
Take me to church, where you hide yourself under the name anonymous and speak words spilled with hatred.
Take me to church, when you try to tear down and destroy beautiful art with your envious words; the type of art that breathes life and hope in another's empty chest.
Take me to church, where your face is covered by a pixel screen and not even then you are brave enough to leave your name after your attempt to create havoc.
Take me to church, whenever you shout your poisonous allegations at someone who shares their passion with the world.
So let me rephrase that, take me to your church, where the religion is hate and maliciousness is encouraged by the preacher, where you strive to degrade another's creation as if you could even comprehend what it spoke about. But we must not forget that parakeets can't understand the meaning of words no matter how much they repeat them, even if the words they repeat are loathsome
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dedicated to @denmysterywoman and @writerscreed due to recent allegations regarding genuine creations of art. Please continue amazing the world with your originality
We were a hurricane,
The glitch in the tranquil weather.
The violent winds
who blew without control
were our hearts,
always chaotic and destructive.
We were never still
and took everything within our path.
The cyclone always strong and never yielding.
that was us,
stubborn and volatile.
The eye of the storm then came,
our little safe haven.
We, then, were foolish enough to think that we would be lasting.
The sun flashed and light poured
through the holes in our empty chests,
where our hearts were supposed to be.
However, we found them hanging
in each other's hands.
The rain bands stopped
but we took no notice of the damage lands.
We ignored how, eventually, our love would be mocked.
And so the hurricane continued its path,
peace was finally broken by reality and so were we.
-destructiveness ran through our veins. we should've expected the natural disaster it left
Inspired by the current disaster that is the Hurricane Irma and all the chaos that it is creating. Please, if you can, avoid donating to the American Red Cross who wasn’t been effective enough in previous natural disasters and instead directly to those affected. Don’t forget us, the islands, and please be safe.This is a time for everyone to stand together.
trembling fingers struggling to hold up your hand “sorry for not being strong enough” when weakness slips into your bones and you fall, f a l l into darkness and you can’t just keep up because it feels so comfortable, because you feel so at ease, because even though the toxic air its destroying your lungs you keep breathing it in, so you just close your window and pull the curtain you lay down and you let your shaky breaths be the music in the room
oh, how much you loved to play an orchestra
with your violent harmony and heart-aching melody,
oh, what a shame it was a one-person concert.
in all the storms that I had endured, in all the droughts that I had survived, and in all the floods I had outlived, I always had you. don’t expect me to recover from this disaster, the one orchestrated by your hands, the same ones who once so gently caressed me and built me castles in the sky.
you were always an instrument of war.
it was me who mistook your silver daggers as tender white petals,
it was me who thought that your rough palms were caused by heavy building and not violent ravaging,
it was me who believed that you could also give and not always take,
you the destroyer of dreams and breaker of hearts.