Velvette Hazbin Hotel - Tumblr Posts

I'm at the beach and I hate it so Hazbin Hotel characters beach head canons:

Alastor: Does not want to be there. Reads the entire time and tries to pretend he's not with the group. Is five seconds away from drowning someone as soon as they get there. Was baited into having a sand castle building contest with Lucifer... He loses. Has a weird grudge against life guards. Also he's wearing the same suit he wears every day like he did not change clothes for the occasion.

Charlie: Doing her best to keep everyone civil. Has to remind everyone to put on sunscreen. WAIT 30 MINUTES TO SWIM AFTER EATING! Tries to keep everyone hydrated. Trying to be the mom friend and saving time to drool over her girlfriend is proving a challenge but she's great at multitasking. Is the only one that ended up sunburned because she was too busy worrying about everyone else

Vaggie: Not a huge fan of the beach but Charlie was SO excited. She's ready to drown Angel and Alastor at all times. Her and Cherri get WAY too competitive at volleyball.

Husk: Was forced to come. Hates the water. Sits in a beach chair drinking from a flask the entire time. Ends up playing volleyball because Angel can be very convincing. Is definitely not staring at Angel the entire time. Falls asleep a couple hours in and sleeps the rest of the time. Alastor definitely dumps a bucket of water on him to wake him up.

Angel: Loves the beach. He spends most of his time tanning/relaxing but he does go in the water for a little while. He only planned on going up to his waist because he didn't want to get all of his fur wet but Cherri makes it her personal mission to dunk him. Is kicked out of volleyball for being too tall. Smokes weed with strangers.

Nifty: Is absolutely obliterated by the waves she almost drowns multiple times... She's having a blast. She sheds a tear for every grain of sand that lands on her blanket.

Sir Pentious: Is so excited to go to the beach but as soon as he touches the sand he's ready to go home. He still ends up being buried though.

Cherri: Was invited last minute. She LOVES the beach. She talks so much shit during volleyball and unfortunately for everyone she can actually back it up. Dunks Angel and is shunned until they become friends with a bunch of weed smoking strangers. Buries Sir Pentious.

Lucifer: Having the time of his life. He's swimming, he's digging holes, he's amazing at volleyball, he befriends a seagull, and he crushes Alastor in a sandcastle building contest. He loves spending time with his daughter but uh oh he gets overstimulated and wants to go home now. He feels really bad about it. Even his duck floaty can't cheer him up.

Vox: Spends hours info dumping about sharks. He water proofed himself but still doesn't spend too much time in the water. The time he does spend in the water is him trying to catch creatures. His bathing suit is just covered in cartoon sharks velvette does not approve of this.

Valentino: Just tans the entire time. Probably tries to recruit people. Will NOT get in the water but will probably throw Velvette in. Ends up leaving with someone else early.

Velvette: Aesthetically pleasing pictures. Is only there to post about it and make people jealous. Val throws her in the water ruining her hair so she ruins every chance he has to recruit someone as revenge.

Also the vees are definitely those people blasting music from a speaker... like this is a public space c'mon now

Hazbin Hotel driving head canons

Sir Pentious: Can't actually press the pedals because he doesn't have feet but he can modify it the thing is that if he modified it he'll add lasers and flames and that wouldn't end well for anyone

Charlie: Literally the most anxious driver you will ever meet. She tried driving one time and she hit someone so she literally never tried again. If she gets behind the wheel of a car she'll have a breakdown. Also the person she hit was completely fine because she was pretty much just inching forward and it was also their fault because they ran into the road she just blames herself for it.

Vaggie: Has never once even thought about driving. She was in heaven and had wings then she was with the princess of Hell which means free limo rides so it's never crossed her mind.

Angel: An absolute menace in the road. He's always driving like he's running from the cops. All the windows rolled down, music blasting, pedal to the metal. He also loves driving because it just feels freeing. He doesn't get the chance often though because he doesn't have a car and Valentino often makes him ride with him in his limo.

Husk: THE ONLY ONE IN THE HOTEL WITH A VALID LICENSE! He's a car guy. He's always liked cars and when he was an overlord he collected them. Pretty much a normal driver other than the drinking and driving thing. His car is always super clean and he will keep it that way. He also would never let anyone drive his car (he let Angel once and immediately regretted it).

Nifty: She can't reach the pedals which is probably for the best but when she's a passenger she'll stick her head out the window like a dog

Alastor: Doesn't like cars. Prefers to travel through shadows or just walk. Honestly though he'd be a passenger princess. He would also be in charge of the music if you even try to take over he'll crash the car. Actually he might just do that for fun.

Cherri: Drives a lot like Angel. Y'know windows down, music blasting, pedal to the metal. She also does street races. She's living it up fast and furious style. Her car is customized, probably has flames painted on the side but other stuff too. She refuses to let anyone else drive her car though because she says she got it "just right". She'll probably blow it up within the week.

Lucifer: Doesn't need a car and I wouldn't trust him within five feet of one. Has probably been in a car like twice in his life because wings and also teleportation. If put behind the wheel he'd accidentally drive off a cliff or something. He has a "duckmobile" that has never and hopefully will never see the light of day. I do think he would be able to drive if he practiced enough though and I hope one day he gets the soccer mom van he deserves.

Vox: Actually really likes driving. It calms him down. He also has the most expensive sports car money could buy (holy shit Vox would buy a cyber truck wouldn't he). He almost never drives places himself though just because he thinks a person of his status shouldn't have to. Bro is such a loser honestly just drive your damn car no one cares.

Valentino: Only rides in his limo because he can't see five fucking feet in front of him and would probably get himself and others killed while causing tons of property damage.

Velvette: She would be a good driver if she would stop texting for five seconds. She prefers the limo though so she can be on her phone and touch up her makeup/hair if needed.

I just feel like because Velvette is chronically online she knows the strangest facts about the most random things and she'll bring it up at the worst times

Valentino is ranting about Angel, Vox is debating throwing himself out the nearest window, and Velvette is sitting in the corner barely listening while scrolling through her phone when all of a sudden "Did you know jumping spiders are cannibals?"

Now Val has ideas, Vox is looking for that window, and no one is having a good time

Characters as things I've said/heard people say

Valentino: ooh~ you're smiling Who're you talking to?

Velvette: I'm looking at memes

Valentino: *visibly disappointed but not surprised* oh

Episode 3 of Hazbin Hotel where everything is the same except Velvette shows up to the overlord meeting in and "I ❤️ Hot Moms" t shirt and throws Carmilla winks and blows her kisses during Respectless

A little bit of the one shot I'm writing because I think I'm funny

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Vox could admit he lost it a little bit when he first heard his old friend was back, he wasn't delusional. He knew he didn't exactly win their fight and did the very thing he told Val not to do minutes before BUT he was justified. He could stop everyone from spreading the battle (or tantrum as Velvette had started calling it) online and now he got the proof he needed that Alastor missed him.

There was no way Alastor would've reacted if he wasn't at least a little bit interested right? Yeah, the deer would come crawling back to him it was only a matter of time. Then the TV demon could reject HIM and give that deer a taste of his own medicine!

---

Vox: I'M NOT DELUSIONAL

Continues to list reasons why he's delusional

Also the way he's calling it a battle... Babe he COOKED you

Characters as things I've said/heard people say

Velvette: What should we wear?

Vox: I was hoping for clothes

Valentino: *disappointed* oh

Hazbin Hotel cooking head canons

Alastor: I think we can all agree he's the best cook in the hotel. He would've learned from his mom and enjoys cooking for people because of it. The first few times he cooked for them everyone was a little weary because cannibalism but he made it "vegetarian" so don't worry. Also he hates cooking with other people that spot is reserved for his mother only and everyone learns really fast to not go into the kitchen while he's cooking.

Sir Pentious: An amazing baker but not a great cook, like he can cook and it comes out fine but he always feels like something isn't right. Loves baking with Angel and Nifty. He even tries to teach Charlie how to bake. She makes no progress but he continues to teach her until he ends up in heaven.

Charlie: An absolute disaster like holy shit. Not only will she set the kitchen on fire she will also create the most disgusting food combinations and act like they're completely normal. She's doing her best I swear. She would probably try to take cooking classes but that would just end horribly.

Vaggie: Cannot cook. Everything will come out burnt and underdone at the same time. She's convinced she's cursed.

Angel: Second best cook at the hotel. Learned from his Nona. He used to cook with Molly all the time but hasn't for a while. He just didn't have the energy to cook and it always made him miss his sister too much. Eventually he got more comfortable at the hotel and started cooking again. Now he tries to cook dinner for everyone at least once a week. Loves cooking with other people he just doesn't have the patience to teach them.

Nifty: Is actually a good cook is just terrible at plating. Her food won't look good but the taste would be worth it. There might be a crunch in something that probably shouldn't be crunchy but just try not to think about it too much.

Husk: Would live off microwavable dinners if they let him. He can't cook but he'll eat anything anyone makes him. He's even eaten Charlie's disgusting food combinations like it was nothing. Can probably figure out how to make anything in the microwave if you give him the time.

Cherri: Do NOT let this woman in the kitchen. She will blow the entire place up and then do it again the next day for fun. Has probably figured out how to make bombs out of food idk how but she would.

Lucifer: He's not a bad cook he just doesn't usually have the energy or patience to do it. He prefers to make sweet foods so he'd specialize in breakfast and dessert. He can make other food too he just doesn't as much. It's probably better for him to have supervision while he cooks though. He gets distracted or just bored really easily. He'll space out or leave the room entirely to do something else and completely forget he's cooking. Like he'd be boiling potatoes to make mashed potatoes and then leave the room to do something and get distracted until suddenly he smells burning and runs into the kitchen to find that all the waters evaporated and the potatoes are burning to the bottom of the pot and he has to start over (no this has never happened to me why would you say that). Because of this Lucifer and Angel tend to cook together because Angel prefers cooking with company and they both have a sweet tooth.

Vox: Mostly lives on cup ramen and take out. He cooked once but it was dry unseasoned chicken and was never allowed to cook again. I want to say he'd have expensive taste but he's a workaholic so leftover Chinese food for the third time this week it is. I'm serious though this man hasn't slept in four days, is on the brink of hallucinating, and is surviving off caffeine, three day old leftovers that should definitely not be eaten, and pure unfiltered spite.

Valentino: He's actually a really good cook. The thing is he can't decide if he wants people to be in the kitchen with him or not because he'll be standing at the stove and ask Vox to hand him something and then five minutes later he's yelling because Vox is in his way. It's a very stressful experience for everyone except Valentino who finds it calming.

Velvette: She's pretty average honestly. Like she can cook fine but it's nothing exciting. She loves trying new recipes she sees online but always gets pissed when it doesn't go as planned so then she orders takeout. She's really good at decorating though like she can't bake a cake but she'd decorate it beautifully so that actually works well with Valentino who can't use a piping bag for shit.

Hazbin Hotel Incorrect Quotes

Velvette: I just want to hear those three magic words

Vox and Valentino: We love you

Velvette: That's sweet but try again

Vox and Valentino: Fine

Vox and Valentino: We will behave

It's the first day of October! Which means the first day of FANTOBER

Anyway here is my fic for day one where Velvette drags Vox on a coffee date!

Date Morning

I'd love to hear your thoughts <3

Hazbin Hotel Characters that I think would be really mad about Pluto's planet status being removed in no specific order with no context

Charlie

Lucifer

Lilith

Alastor

Velvette

Adam

Emily

Hazbin Hotel characters I think would agree that Pluto isn't a planet in no specific order with no context

Sir Pentious

Vox

Lute

Hazbin Hotel characters that literally do not care but would start discourse for fun in no specific order with no context

Angel

Cherri

Niffty

Valentino

Hazbin Hotel characters that have no opinion on the subject and are just SO tired of this discussion in no specific order with no context

Vaggie

Husk

Sera

she hazbin on my hotel til i redeem myself

Vees with a Android Reader

Valentino

Valentino had plenty of servants around, such as Kitty

So he didn’t really need another little assistant

But what he did need was a maid

And Valentino isn’t the biggest fan of actual demons that can make mistakes, so he just went out and bought a cleaning android

You were pretty small, about 4’11 and came with a little maid dress and a feather duster

When Valentino first powered you on, he expected a cute little robot who’d follow his orders and not say a word

But you weren’t normal- far from it actually

The Moth Overlord was greeted with a bubbly little maid who would follow him around like a lost puppy whenever you weren’t deep cleaning the place like a maniac

You were eccentric, though obedient and that was what he mostly cared about

Vox nearly had a heart attack when he first met you as you immediately jumped up onto him to clean some dust upon his flat face

Whenever Vox was gone, and Valentino didn’t have anyone to rant to, he would always make a mess of his quarters whilst screaming his frustrations out to you as you quickly cleaned up his trash

Slowly but surely, Valentino grew fond of you, and even would gift you in new clothes or cleaning supplies whenever he was feeling charitable

He treats you better than his other employees, but he also thinks less of you, like you are an Imp or something like that, but he still likes you

“Darling I’m pretty sure that it’s clean,” he protested, looking down at your skittering figure as you darted from place to place in an attempt to keep everything tidy. 

He was elegantly perched on his couch, holding up a drink Kitty had brought over earlier, watching in amusement as you dashed around in a panic. There was a party happening, and you were eager to make sure everything looked nice

“No it isn’t!” you called back, snatching an empty glass and quickly stuffing it into the dishwasher. “Everything’s so dirty!” You crawled around with such speeds that Valentino might have mistaken you for a little bug, which was actually one of his many nicknames for you

“Whatever you say, ladybug,” 

Velvette

Long story short, Velvette was running out of patience 

She needed models to advertise, and all of them kept dying or were just outright ugly in the outfits she provided

After complaining to Vox for forever, he suggested that she buy a model bot

With some convincing, she actually listened, and went out and purchased one, which happened to be you

Though you were bland, so before powering you on she was quick to pazazz and doll you up

And when you did wake up, and did as your manual said, she was pleased

For once, Velvette was nice to someone, and it was a little robot who was constantly pasted onto billboards, commercials, and magazines all dressed in her products

She was chill with you, and you weren’t complaining about free makeup, perfume and clothing

The only thing was that she was very controlling, and liked to have you as her arm candy basically wherever she went

But it was nice to almost never be on the receiving end of her Cockney accent and British slang

 Not many people knew your name outside of the V tower, so people online nicknamed you Dolly, 

You didn’t really have a name actually, but Velvette enjoyed calling you things like: ‘Sweetheart’ “Dollface’ and ‘Sugar’

And very…very rarely, she will sometimes listen to your opinions, things you picked up on when working with her

“Ugh! All of this is trash!” Velvette snapped, stomping with a deep glare at the line up of demons who had crafted the clothing you were dressed up in. 

They all winced underneath her sharp and furious gaze, recoiling away from her quippy and sassy comments as she scolded the people. Meanwhile, you glanced over at something on the pile of clothing.

“Velvette?” you called, making her whip over to glare at you, to which you shyly pointed over to a black and hot pink crop top that sat atop the pile. “What if I matched that with the skirt?”

She seemed skeptical, but with a snap of your fingers, your sleeveless turtleneck was replaced by the crop top, which magically seemed to match the boots and the fitted skirt you wore

Never before had you seen Velvette so surprised before.

“Sweetheart you’re a genius!” she chirped, her frown switching to a bright smile in a second. Velvette then darted over to you, grabbing you by the side and pulling you into a side hug. “Alright- we’re gonna go get you some upgrades today just because of how smart you are.”

Vox

Vox is a lot different from the others simply because he had built you

Originally, you were going to be an assistant type of bot he was going to sell worldwide, with secret cameras in your optics so he could spy on more of Hell

But mistakes were made, and you, the first prototype, ended up adopting a personality he grew quick to enjoy

Though he did end up selling more advanced models like yourself, he kept you, the first

Instead, you were the main hostess of the News he kept up, as Vox was usually pretty busy

The people adored you, and Vox couldn’t just rid of you

Not that he’d want to- so he kept you

He was very attached to your original model, so you were usually denied when asking for upgrades to your system

Though sometimes, he would give you little things here and there

Switchable hands, Better cameras, cleaner plates, or better wiring

But Vox always refused when you asked for a different model

You would always stay in the same body, and he wasn’t backing out of that

He has a lot of nicknames up his sleeve, and enjoys your reactions when he brings in new ones

“Dearheart, Darling, Sugar, etc”

Overall, he’s probably the best to be owned by

let’s make a deal 😈⚡️

(pov you sold your soul to the vees)

pspspps my insta

staticmoth week day 2: selfie! 💙❤️💜

my insta ☆

Everything I've seen and read has gone on the assumption that a deal is broken if a sinner who sold their soul is redeemed. But what if it isn't? What if whoever owned them in Hell still owns them?

That would make overlords so much more dangerous to have winners at their disposal. That also brings into question whether or not what they're forced to do by their souls' owners counts towards their status as a winner/sinner, since it wasn't by choice.

Velvette is so short lol. She's literally standing on the table and is barely taller than the other overlords that are sitting (except for Zeezie, for obvious reasons)

Calm girlboss and emotional malewife old married couple real