I write what I want, and what I want, is rwby because I am mentally unwell. but I cover it up by trying to be ✨ F U N N Y ✨
553 posts
Infoglitch - That One Guy Who Doesn't Know When To SHUT UP. - Tumblr Blog
The emerald tide
God I wish I could draw so that way I could make it more obvious how fuckin intimidating my monster designs are.
And also I wanna demonstrate how much of a fucking hunk Lucius is because my ass likes being HORNY-
Let's also not forget the fuckin fact the fanatics decided to act like HBomberguy made an entire hit piece despite him not doing so, instead he stated his criticisms in a understandable way and has even said "it's not the worst show ever made".
The fucker made it clear he had no I'll will towards this fuckin show yet instead the fanatics acted like overgrown toddlers because someone didn't say the exact thing they wanted.
This only continues to remind me the fanatics do not understand what the fuck an opinion is and that they are just a bunch of fuckin babies who actively enjoy making this fandom look bad.
God just
WTF.
"Hbomberguy had a personal vendetta against Monty Oum"
If anything, canonseeker is the one who has a personal vendetta. A vendetta because of a 4 year old video.
Lady dimitrescu ain't questionable. It's taste.
Let's see.. theres
1- Lilith morningstar
2- the Lovely lady Beelzebub
And finally 3- dogmatika ecclesia, the virtuous.
ok I saw this on a YouTube video I thought about doing it here, I'm going to talk about 3 waifus, 1- the most recent, 2- the favorite, 3- oh more ''questionable'' I must say. and whoever I tag must do the same
1- Maki zenin
2- Ada Wong
3- Lady Dimitrescu
@spahhzy @infoglitch @rwby-encrusted-blog @howlingday @gorillageek27
PAIN OF BEING A GAMER
Me: .....SCREEEEEEEEEEEE-
Ergo: What?! What the fuck is it?!
Me: BLACK MYTH WUKONG, ITS INFECTED MY MIND!
Ergo: that game that basically every gamer is talking about?
Me: YES!
Ergo: so I assume you wanna play it?
Me: hell yes! I am mythology scum and the game is up my alley!
Ergo:.. but?
Me:.. But I CANT because it isn't on fuckin XBOX! Just like-
Ergo: ultrakill?
Me: YES! I WANNA PLAY BOTH OF THEM BUT I CAAAAANNNT!
Ergo: be patient dude.. I'm sure atleast ultrakill will come to xbox
Me: but black myth wukong!
Ergo: ahp! It's probably a PlayStation exclusive dude.
Me: but-
Ergo: do you have money to buy a PS5?
Me:... No... No I don't..
Ergo: then too bad.
Glitch is a sad broke gamer.
... I feel like I'm the only one who isn't surprised.
Like Ace op's, Aesop's.
Kinda on the nose. (Maybe I just know of aesop because I watch one piece) but that's just me.
Outside of that you ain't dumb. Stuff like this can happen to everyone.
GUYS
IM SO DUMB I JUST REALIZED
THE ACE OPS
ARE ALL BASED OFF OF AESOP’S FABLES
WTF
THE TORTOISE AND THE HARE????
THE ELM AND THE VINE?????
A FISHERMAN’S LUCK????
THE DOG AND HIS REFLECTION?????
MY MIND HAS BEEN BLOWN
wonderfully put good sir, a new request, should you choose to accept it hot goth ren and jaune. They were gonna go out clubbing with neon after a hard day at work in atlas. Their outfits? all black. Their fishnets? torn. eyeliner? sharp enough to kill a man, croptops? displaying abs. The finishing blow? Black. Lipstick. the others came in right as they were about to leave. They never stood a chance. this is me daring you to go at your goofiest, soldier, pure crackfic, absolute mayham, DO IT. YOU WONT.
Pug.. you underestimate me and my sheer fuckin GOOFYNESS. So let me show you
How goofy I shall be!
Jaune found himself applying his lipstick as Ren looked at him.
Ren: may I ask why you decide to go goth?
Jaune: one name, Neon.
Ren:.. why dress like a goth girl, minus the skirt?
Jaune: Ren, my brother from another mother.. I've dressed up like a girl for years because my sisters wanted someone to model them... Plus I may be a tad curious about cross dressing.
Ren: alright then... Can I join?
Jaune: sure thing dude. I should have some extra stuff for you to use.
After a bit they finished up they opened the door and stepped out of their dorm only to stop as they saw team Rwby, Pyrrha, and Nora. The duo and the group stared at each other before Ren gulped softly as jaune spoke with a smile.
Jaune: hey everyone! Don't mind me and Ren, we are just heading to a party neon invited me to.
Nora: ok.. cool.. hey fearless leader you mind if I borrow Ren for a second?
Ren went pale as he looked at jaune.
Jaune: oh sure thing Nora. just be back soon.
Nora: thanks jaune.
Nora grabbed Ren and dragged him away as Nora's face became increasingly more red. Jaune hummed softly as he looked back at the rest of their girls and before he could even speak they pounced on him.
Neither went to the party, they did however go to the infirmary..
their Poor Pelvises are reduced to dust.
... So y'all know i am Dragonslayer trash.. but also blackguard garbage.. sooo-
Bleiss wrapped her arms around her boyfriend as she kissed his cheek.
(Ferret!Faunus) Bleiss: darling, I believe you and I both know that book is full of shit.. besides wouldn't you wanna learn the fun way.
Jaune gulped softly before feeling a hand on his shoulder as he saw yang smiling at him. As she spoke in a disarming voice.
(Komodo dragon!Faunus) Yang: you don't really have any other choice lady killer~
Jaune:.. I assume I'm not gonna be walking for months am I?
Bleiss: nnnnope!~
Yang: just a week. Every month.
Jaune:... Oh boy.. aura don't fail me now
(also what should be jaune x Bleiss x yang ship name? I'm calling it black dragon guard. Cause I feel like it)
Jaune: *Reading a book on humans dating faunus*
Jaune: Shattered pelvis... Extreme dehydration... litters...
Jaune: Is it really worth it?
(Imagine your Jaune OTP, faunus edition)
Your all fools..
Its-
Call me cringe but this bitch can get it.
Happy Waifu Wednesday. Now show me your waifu!
Gentlemen I need my gun.
rb if your blog is not at all a safe space for these red flags
(image: dreamsexual, zoophilia, p3d0philia/maps, alt map)
FYI the red-yellow flag is AAM aka adult-attracted minors. Same effects as a MAP.
Well if we throw in neo we should throw in cinder too.
More hate sex is best. Get yang hate fucking neo, Blake and Weiss hate fuckin, and jaune and cinder not just hate fuckin but "IM GONNA KILL YOU!" FUCKIN.
I think Negative!Weiss and Negative!Blake should have raw, nasty, violent hate sex.
I don't think it would fix them, in fact I think it'd make them worse, but it'd be Hot.
i see you are whiteknight trash like i am. let me ask you this weiss is captured in atlass, the schnee family mansion. We must stage a tactical rescue. who does jaune bring as part of the mission to break her out and what is their role? starter lineup, nora? demolitions expert, ren? assasin. Oscar? union representative. Qrow? Wildcard. Whats jaunes plan? (dont think about it too hard, this is purely wish fufilment "fuck yeah" kinda fiction. dont even gotta write any thing in character or nathin)
Ah @philosophicalpug you've come to the right shop.
But I must warn you. For I am someone who goes overboard. You just allowed me to be fuckin GOOFY.
Let's get fucking ridiculous!
Breaking out the ice queen!
The night was cold as Weiss sat in her room, trapped in her own mansion. As some punks managed to jump her, demanding a ransom of 3,000,000 lien. However Weiss knew one thing.. one significant thing that anyone on this planet should fear her for.
She had the money to buy all the ingredients for Ren's pancake recipe. Meaning one person. Nora Valkyrie.
We cut to RBYJNRQO as Nora seemed to be preparing her weapon as she had a shadow over her face.
Ruby: alright everyone. Let's run over the plan again.
Jaune: ok, first Ruby, your our a way in and out.
Ruby: yang is our distraction.
Yang: I'll cause some noise so that way they don't notice you all bust in.
Jaune: blake-
Blake: I'm making sure yang has backup.
Jaune:.. I was gonna say you watch our backs but ok.
Oscar: I'll handle negotiations if you can't find her.
Ren: I'll take over Blake's position so that way you have someone watching out for you.
Ruby: thanks Ren.
Ren: Weiss is our friend.. we won't abandon her.
Nora: I'll break through the walls.. and any guards legs.
Everyone looked at Nora as Ren just sighed before hugging her.
Qrow: I guess that leaves me. I'll be around.. I wanna see if my semblance can be useful.
Ruby: you don't have to do that uncle qr-
Qrow: this is your friend, kiddo. For all I know if I join you on this breakout mission she could get seriously hurt.
Ruby:.. alright but if things go bad?
Qrow: I said I'd be around didn't I?
Qrow had a smirk as Ruby smiled at him. Jaune clapped his hands as he had a grin.
Jaune: alright we got everyone ready. Let's get to work!
Nora & Yang: YEAH!
We cut back to Weiss as she hummed softly. Her eyes looked at the window as she for a second saw a plume of red from beyond it. A smile crept up her face as the 25 minutes felt like 15 seconds as jaune, Ruby, Ren, and Nora came in.
Ruby's face quickly turned to a smile as she practically flung herself at the heiress.
Ruby: WEISS!
Weiss chuckled as Ruby hugged her.
Weiss: good to see you too Ruby.
Jaune: alright before we can be all cuddly and celebrate we gotta get you out.
Weiss: I expected so.. do you have Myrtenaster?
Jaune practically yoinked out Weiss's weapon as Weiss smiled. With said smile evoking a small blush on Jaune's face.
After a few minutes and an annoyed Nora having to cut Weiss's bindings despite her not being forced to. Weiss was free as she held Myrtenaster and inspected it. It seemed to still be in pristine condition.
Weiss: now let's get going.
Nora didn't even reply she just broke down the wall as Ruby quickly took Ren and Nora as she petal burst off.
Weiss: while we have this time.. Jaune?
Jaune looked at the heiress as the girl gave him a nod.
Weiss: thank you.
Jaune: shouldn't you be thanking Ruby?
Weiss: trust me I will.. but I wanted to personally thank you first.. you've become a lot better of a man.
Jaune: well.. I want to make sure I'm able to help my friends.. and that means being a lot less of an ass.
Weiss just smirked before Ruby arrived as she took Weiss and Jaune and they left in a burst of petals.
Mission: SUCCESS
DOMAIN EXPANSION:
CLIMAX CLOG
DOMAINE EXPANSION
Kidney stones
..yeah don't mind me just gonna
BLAGH.
Weiss Schnee: Birthright.
(Verse 1)
A mirror inside of my room. Kept me divided in two. So to me on the other side all I ask is this.
What is our birthright?
Is it a throne to sit upon as everyone's heart grows cold.
Colder each minute.
My heart is dying.
Telling me I'm so brave.
I know your all lying.
(Chorus)
You all lied to my face.
You muddied my family name.
And I'm the one left to be blamed.
So to all of the cruelty.
And the ones who led me astray.
My cage is open I will fly free.
And
Find
My
BIRTHRIGHT.
(Verse 2)
The kingdom you built in the sand.
Left to wash away as you will soon fade.
The pain you caused was nothing but a wound.
And Mine will heal soon
So take that royal tests that once burdened me
For I fly free. I'll shove it in your face because I refuse to let you win
And I refuse to let this suffering live.
You heart from day one, you forced us all to feel alone.
So I say no.
(Chorus)
You all lied to my face.
You muddied my family name.
And I'm the one left to be blamed.
So to all of the cruelty.
And the ones who led me astray.
My cage is open I will fly free.
And
Find
My
BIRTHRIGHT.
(Verse 3)
Freedom, oh sweet freedom.
How I longed for the moment that I'm finally free.
This kingdom of sand is weak as snow.
The kingdom I will build will be beautiful like ice.
You wanted to be immortal.
By haunting our dreams.
But I become immortal because I am free.
(Chorus)
You all lied to my face.
You muddied my family name.
And I'm the one left to be blamed.
So to all of the cruelty.
And the ones who led me astray.
My cage is open I will fly free.
And
Find
My
BIRTHRIGHT.
I uh.. I wrote a really shitty Ruby rose song for my Rwby rewrite... Your all going to read the lyrics because I suck at music. And am too much of a fucking pussy to even try singing it.
Ruby Rose: thorns (act 1)
(Verse 1)
(In a whispered voice) red like roses fill my dreams.
My dreams are empty, lost of hope.
The infinite distance set in my life.
Things set into motion as you died.
(In a whispered voice) and leads me too. The place you rest.
I didn't want this.
Yet it happens to me.
Ripped out of my hands. I'm all alone.
(chorus)
I feel like a ghost!
Trapped in these walls, Left to cry this sad song!
i'm sick of the sorrow, I'm sick of the hate. I'm left alone with only my thorns
And all my thorns they prick and prod!
HOW CAN I MOVE ON?!
WHEN YOU ARE GONE!
(Verse 2)
(In a whispered voice) white is cold and always yearning.
I wish you were here, I wish I said I love you and goodbye.
But now I am here all alone, feeling like a rose, that's only thorns.
(In a whispered voice) burdened by a royal test.
Lost all the beauty, but kept all that pain, i feel incomplete.
Dear mother if your listening to me.
Please
stop
Haunting my dreams!
(chorus)
I feel like a ghost!
Trapped in these walls, Left to cry this sad song!
i'm sick of the sorrow, I'm sick of the hate. I'm left alone with only my thorns
And all my thorns they prick and prod!
HOW CAN I MOVE ON?!
WHEN YOU ARE GONE!
(Verse 3)
(In a whispered voice) Black the beast descends from Shadows.
I feel them creeping in. The regrets digging under my skin.
When you left all I felt was that I was alone.
I wish you were here so that way you do what you would and that you could you say
“I love you my dear daughter”
(In a whispered voice) yellow beauty burns
Scorching the world. All I feel is alone. And I'm sick of this feeling.
Deep in my soul.
(In a whispered voice) gold.
I'm sorry it's just cringe I just really wanted peoples opinions on these shitty ass lyrics.
Revelation.
Nemesis's mask is finally knocked off. As Johnson learns who is under it.
And he is horrified.
God damnit y'all started the damn party without me.
Let's not forget their greedy asses moved one of the series that was barely profitable to a dog shit streaming app and removed it from the app it was founded on as well as moving it to Crunchyroll where they specifically made it so you have to buy a membership for Crunchyroll so you can watch the series if you don't use their dog shit app.
And to add insult to injury now that they've shut down now basically no one can legally watch this series because they were so confident that they wouldn't go under.
And to push it even FURTHER. Let's not forget they practically massacred ironwood and treated him like a fuckin dictator while also revealing his semblance on a fuckin video that basically made everyone start to wonder "are you villainizing someone who's semblance is basically a handicap upon their decision making and their ability to make sense?".
AND LETS NOT FORGET THE EVER AFTER LADIES AND GENTLEMEN AND THE BULLSHIT THEY TRIED TO DO WHEN DISCUSSING SUICIDE-
OK I'mma stop because I have yet to make it to V9 and I don't feel like making an ass out of myself.. yet.
Apologies this probably ain't the fuckin mood but I just, relish the chances to shit on rt and remind everyone why they ain't SHIT.
You know what if roster teeth wasn't such a bad studio maybe we wouldn't have had such shit volumes sorry if this is kinda toxic
Nah fuck that dude, this isn't toxic, this is just facts. Rooster Teeth are a dogshit company that did nothing for itself but shoot itself in the foot over and over because of a parasocial relationship with its fans, listen to blind praise and never listen to criticism, double-triple-quadruple-AND-quintuple down on their headassery, and blatantly lie about their story being planned from the beginning and spit on their friend's grave for his wishes (baring Neath Oum and Monty's Oum wife who did nothing wrong), maybe, JUUUUUST maybe, they'd still be around and their reputation wouldn't be down the sewer and into the most vile septic tank in the world right now.
Decided to give this fucker as fire mohawk for his mask.. I kinda like it. Makes him look more monstrous.
... Ok let's do this.
But I'm titling this section as season 1. Because fuck you.
Jaune is a WHORE! PT. 5
Jaune at this point was used to being in uncomfortable positions and this one was no different as now he sat infront of Sun. The monkey faunus just sitting there seemingly calm as his blue haired friend paced back and forth foaming at the mouth.
Jaune: um if I may ask. Why am I here-
Sun: because Neptune is feeling salty
Jaune:..why?
Neptune: because you fucked Weiss, her hot sister, even her MOM! And now I find out you managed to bone MY MOTHER! Jaune I know we barely know each other but-
Jaune: I'm a whore.. I know. I've been told that many.
Neptune: AND THAT'S A DAMN PROBLEM! YOUR STEALING ALL THE HOT BABES!
Sun: nep. No offense man but I can't really blame the guy.
Neptune:.. sun I'm begging you not to finish the sentence.
Sun: your mom's hot dude. Id do her too if we weren't friends.
Neptune just looked at him before raising a fist as sun just rolled his eyes as jaune looked at the monkey faunus.
Jaune: your supprisingly chill... Especially considering the fact I slept with Blake too.
Sun: don't get me wrong I was mad at first but I know Blake is smart enough to make a good choices. Plus it's not like I was gonna score her anyway.
Jaune: so... You knew about her and yang?
Sun sighed softly as his tail swished back and forth.
Sun: more of just a hunch. Those two were chained at the hip, sometimes you just can't beat a bond formed early.
Neptune: back to the problem at hand. jaune, you being a whore is causing a major issue. I need to ask you to please, stop
Jaune just chuckled softly before standing up as he winced and grabbed his hips.
Jaune: Neptune. We both know that's never gonna happen.. I can't stop them.
Neptune: what do you mean you can't stop them? And who's "them"?!
Jaune got close as he put a hand on Neptunes shoulder and looked at him in the eyes.
Jaune: the women... They hunt people like me... They hunt dorks
Neptune: dear oum...
Jaune: i can't feel my pelvis Neptune... But they'll keep coming. I can't stop them.
Sun: ah so that's why ilia was looking at me funny.
Suddenly a frantic knock at the door was heard.
Nora: fearless leader! Let me in! I think something's going on with Ren.
To be continued...
JESUS FUCKIN CHRIST REASHOT?!
Then again this is a shitpost, I shouldn't be surprised, But still.
Ruby Is A Good Girl, I Swear.
Jaune: *Pat Ruby's head once*
Ruby:
True love.
Apologies everyone I was in the middle of questioning if I was bi or if I just wanted to fuck a femboy. Anyway time for fucking ANGST- wait.. shit this isn't angst this.. this is it, the one ship I can't make fucking depressing! BLACKGUARD!
@spahhzy, @epic-arc you are all in my domain. I welcome you, to blackguard paradise.
The only place where you heathens understand-
THAT I AM FUCKIN GOOFY!
(also I'm sorry but Bleiss's real name should be Bellamere. I will make a fuckin petition and FORCE EVERYONE to sign that shit, I actively refuse to acknowledge her by a shitty name choice. Is this me acting like I'm big shit because I wrote like 4 blackguard fics prior to this? Yes.. but also because I'm sick of Bleiss's name being just Bleiss. LET ME BE DELUSIONAL.)
Jaune laid beside his wife as he combed a hand through her hair. The woman he loved was humming softly as she cradles their infant son.
Jaune: hey.. Bellamere?
Bleiss: hmm, Yes darling?
The black sheep of the schnee family looked up at jaune. Her magenta eyes being filled with that same love he saw days, weeks, months, years, decades ago.. he saw it constantly in her eyes. And it always made his heart skip a beat.
Jaune: I.. I'm glad you didn't give up on me..
Bleiss: darling-
Jaune: I promise I'm not shitting on myself.. thank you Bellamere.. thank you for loving me, for having faith in me.. even when I let.. even when I let that cat possess me.
Bleiss: Jaune.. sweetheart, I want you to listen to me.
Bleiss managed to turn without waking the sleeping baby in her arms.
Bleiss: I want you to understand something, all those years in Beacon, those years you and Weiss helped me reconnect with my family, the years we spent together in the ever after. every single one of those years. I will gladly go through it again. because I love you.
Bleiss moved a hand and cusped her cheek.
Bleiss: and no matter what, I will always love you. Now and forever.. and even if I went through more hell than those years brought.. as long as you and our child would be there for me at the end. I'd gladly go through it. Because you, my sister's, my brother, my mother, my own child.. all of the people I have grown to care for.. you are all worth more than the world to me.
Jaune's face heated up as a smile crossed his Face. As he leaned in and kissed the one woman that stole his heart... and gave hers in return.
Jaune's eyes stared at the gravestone as he held his son's hand. The young boy crying. While jaune barely managed to choke back tears.
The date didn't matter, the rest of her name didn't matter. As all jaune needed was to see her first name and nickname on the grave.
His wife.
His partner.
His everything.
Was dead.
But as jaune wanted to just.. vanish he looked to his son, the boys pitch black hair and azure eyed reminded jaune.. he still had someone to be there.
The next few years would hurt, they would never hurt less but to Jaune all that matters was that his son still had his father.
And an Arc never leaves his family.
Cute.. but utterly fruitless.
If we are going child for child it's time-
DOMAINS EXPANSION:
SELF EMBODIMENT OF A TRUE BLACKGUARD SHIPPER
''Mutal Love''
Jaune would get home and go to his room and see Weiss sleeping which would make him smile and then he would go to his son and daughter's room and lean on the crib leaving his hand close to his babies.
Jaune: I hope I can be a good father to you two…
When Jaune would say that he would be hugged from behind and saw that it was Weiss with a calm and slightly serious expression on her face.
Weiss: How many times will I have to repeat to you that you will be a good father..
Jaune turned around hugging Weiss too and would caress her face and take the opportunity to kiss her on the forehead which would form a comfortable smile on her face.
Jaune: hehe I know you've repeated this several times but I keep remembering what happened with Lewis and Alyx..
Jaune would say that and have a sad expression on his face and Weiss would notice by placing one of her hands on his face and with a warm and comfortable smile.
Weiss: Jaune, what happened to alyx and lewis wasn't your fault, alyx was just a scared child who preferred to follow her fear but look on the bright side you were a great figure for lewis who made you be marked as one of the best hunters in the history of remmant heh.
Weiss would pull Jaune for a kiss and he would kiss back and after a few minutes the two would look at their babies and a smile forms on Jaune's face with some tears of joy.
Jaune: I promise we will be the best parents in the world.
Weiss: And I always believe in your promises.
Jaune would place his hand on the crib and see his son holding his finger, forming a small smile on the baby's face.
@spahhzy @infoglitch
Domain Expansion: WHITE KNIGHT LOVE
Alright then. It seems I have to pause the glitch cycle.
Let's fucking go.
SHOW ME WHAT YA GOT SPAHHZY!
..I think it's safe to say I won the angst war between me, @spahhzy, and @epic-arc. With three solid angst posts and both of them being radio silent for a minute (I feel like I should be worried about that but eh). I feel like I just hit a fuckin black flash..
is that cringe?
Ah who gives a shit! I won!
Now it's time for the glitch cycle! Let the suffering begin!
But before that, back to your regular scheduled program of lovey dovey Bullshit and me being fuckin GOOFY.
And to make it even worse throw yang in the mix. Hate sex plus blondes always end up in broken beds and broken pelvises.
I think Negative!Weiss and Negative!Blake should have raw, nasty, violent hate sex.
I don't think it would fix them, in fact I think it'd make them worse, but it'd be Hot.
..I think it's safe to say I won the angst war between me, @spahhzy, and @epic-arc. With three solid angst posts and both of them being radio silent for a minute (I feel like I should be worried about that but eh). I feel like I just hit a fuckin black flash..
is that cringe?
Ah who gives a shit! I won!
Now it's time for the glitch cycle! Let the suffering begin!
But before that, back to your regular scheduled program of lovey dovey Bullshit and me being fuckin GOOFY.