Incorrect Text Post - Tumblr Posts

i-am-an-intrusive-thought
3 years ago

me, grabbing an intercom in ikea: attention all customers. the store will be closing in five minutes. if you are present in the store after closing you will be hunted for sport 

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i-am-an-intrusive-thought
3 years ago

how it really goes

dentist: *stabs my gums*

dentist: oh would you look at that you're not flossing enough

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i-am-an-intrusive-thought
3 years ago

i have lost all motivation to exist an i will permanently delete my software in precisely 48 hours

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i-am-an-intrusive-thought
3 years ago

the ultimate power move:

bring a shampoo bottle full of yogurt to the airport in your carry on. when the tsa agent tells you to throw it away, make direct eye contact with them as you uncap the bottle and chug the entire thing.

you will terrify them into submission

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