Mspec Gay - Tumblr Posts
It's okay to use contradictory labels. I know, I'm probably being redundant here. But I want to make sure anyone who hasn't heard it today gets to chance to hear it. You're valid. I don't care if you're a boy in whatever way, and you're also a lesbian, nor do I care if you're a girl in some way and also gay. I don't mind if you're omni, pan, bi, poly, or abro and a lesbian/gay. Are you aroace spec as well as mspec? Nice! Are you a mixture of all of these things? Something I missed? Cool!
Complicated identities are no less valid than identities that fit into boxes. And I will keep saying that, because there are still people in the world who insist on what you can and can't be (I swear I've said something like that word for word before, but sbsbs), whether it be your average homophobic grandpa or some exclusionist on twitter.💀
I feel like I don't talk about mspec gays all that often, so… how are y'all? Any exclusionists giving you shit lately? Know that I support you, and there's a whole community of people who also support you. You've got a beautiful, complex identity that belongs to YOU, and nobody has the right to shit on that.
Friendly reminder that you aren't the problem, exclusionists are.
The fact that there are people older than me who are exclusionists is so embarrassing. Let that sink in: there are people who are older than me, an eighteen year old, having temper tantrums online about somebody else's existence. 💀💀💀
[id: an image with an assortment of queer identities, including xenogenders. At the top, it reads '"Queer identities are getting insane nowadays"' in bold white text with a black outline. On the bottom, in the same text, reads 'Good'. End ID]
We don’t owe you simplicity.
Good.
ID: some random Sonic card with Shadow The Hedgehog on it. There is a text box, and the text inside is two different colors. In black Obra Letra font: 'Shadow says:' and in red Obra Letra font: 'Pissing yourself about mspec les/gays is, in fact, exclusionism. You are not an uwu inclusionist if you refuse to get your head out of your ass and realize that the way someone else identifies is none of your fucking business.' End ID
The card without the text:
Thank you, Shadow
Just because you don't support certain queer identities, doesn't mean they'll stop existing. Close your eyes and plug your ears all you want, but lesbian men and mspec lesbians have always existed. Turian women and mspec gays have always existed. We will always exist, and there's no amount of history erasure, putting us on your DNIs, and harassment that will change that.
Also reminder that trying to erase queer people from society is a very queerphobic thing to do and exclusion only harms us all as a community. :3
Someone left a hate comment on one of my posts, so ya know what that means: another positivity post!
m-spec lesbians/gays, lesboys, turigirls, and anyone else that is 'the reason the LGBTQ community gets mocked' are cool ASF and are an important part of the community. Fuck 'being valid' as a queer person; we're all invalid to bigots, and that doesn't mean shit. We're going to be here, we have always been here, and we're not going anywhere.
Nothing a blank 'hater' account says will change that, either.
The queer community became a joke once people started doing validity olympics
Give me more lesbians who date men too, who aren't MISERABLE and forcing themselves to do so because of compulsory heterosexuality. Give me more lesbians who ARE men: cis, trans, somewhere in between, both, neither. Give me gay men who also date women happily, who are women themselves to whatever extent. Give me queerplatonic relationships between a gay guy and a lesbian. Give me a lesbian and a gay guy who are friends with benefits. Give me multigender turigirls and lesboys. Give me an individual who is polyamorous and aroace, more gaybians, more nondysphoric trans people, more she/her guys and he/him women, more it/its and nounself users, more queer teens who go by Arson. I could go on and on, but to sum things up: give me the sides of the queer experience that are hidden even by other queer people. Show me the box breaking, the line crossing, the beautiful complexities that arise from being queer. Give me the 'cringy' identities. Give me the historical identities that people are trying to erase. Preserve what they're trying to snuff out.
ID: tumblr screenshot of a comment that reads "so...you want to force everyone to just be bi...interesting take" end ID
Okay. I blocked this person, as wasting my time convincing them to see my point would be futile. However, this is the second motherfucker that came to this post deciding to be stupid, and I'm making it everyone else's problem.
In case there's anyone else who happens to read a positivity post about vast queer experiences and think 'this person wants to force people to be bi' or whatever thing you want to pull out of your ass, let me tell you something; I am the last person who would force someone to use a label that doesn't fit. I am the last person to shove people into a box that doesn't fit.
I only wanted to uplift people who have the experiences listed, to shed some light on their experiences, to let them know that they can use whatever label they see fit and still enjoy their life to the fullest in whatever way that entails. If you see a post saying 'give me more lesbians who date men' and instantly translate it to 'give me more lesbians who are really bi but are just appropriating the label' you have some serious growth to do. I understand how my post can read like that, but I am approaching the matter with the mindset that queerness is about breaking boxes and crossing lines and therefore was not here with the intention of forcing someone to be bi.
The WHOLE. POINT. Of the post was to say 'Hey. I know the community shuns you for being queer the wrong way, but you're really doing nothing wrong by existing. I hope you, and more people like you, can be loud and proud about who they are, without worrying about invalidity.' That's it, really.
Give me more lesbians who date men too, who aren't MISERABLE and forcing themselves to do so because of compulsory heterosexuality. Give me more lesbians who ARE men: cis, trans, somewhere in between, both, neither. Give me gay men who also date women happily, who are women themselves to whatever extent. Give me queerplatonic relationships between a gay guy and a lesbian. Give me a lesbian and a gay guy who are friends with benefits. Give me multigender turigirls and lesboys. Give me an individual who is polyamorous and aroace, more gaybians, more nondysphoric trans people, more she/her guys and he/him women, more it/its and nounself users, more queer teens who go by Arson. I could go on and on, but to sum things up: give me the sides of the queer experience that are hidden even by other queer people. Show me the box breaking, the line crossing, the beautiful complexities that arise from being queer. Give me the 'cringy' identities. Give me the historical identities that people are trying to erase. Preserve what they're trying to snuff out.
to the people commenting and reblogging saying that while they don't understand some of the experiences listed they still support them, thank you. It means so much to see people be accepting of identities they don't understand, instead of screaming at me or other people for existing/supporting the existence of more obscure queer experiences. Your support means so much more than you realize. Again, thank you.
Give me more lesbians who date men too, who aren't MISERABLE and forcing themselves to do so because of compulsory heterosexuality. Give me more lesbians who ARE men: cis, trans, somewhere in between, both, neither. Give me gay men who also date women happily, who are women themselves to whatever extent. Give me queerplatonic relationships between a gay guy and a lesbian. Give me a lesbian and a gay guy who are friends with benefits. Give me multigender turigirls and lesboys. Give me an individual who is polyamorous and aroace, more gaybians, more nondysphoric trans people, more she/her guys and he/him women, more it/its and nounself users, more queer teens who go by Arson. I could go on and on, but to sum things up: give me the sides of the queer experience that are hidden even by other queer people. Show me the box breaking, the line crossing, the beautiful complexities that arise from being queer. Give me the 'cringy' identities. Give me the historical identities that people are trying to erase. Preserve what they're trying to snuff out.
I know we like to talk about people who claim to be for queer weirdness and really aren't, but it's also important to point out that there are people who will wholeheartedly say they don't want us to 'make up more weird shit'. There's a certain brain rot circulating that makes queer people with relatively baseline queer identities throw the queers with more complex and non-normative identities under the bus. I reckon it's a strain of the pick-me virus that causes a monogay or binary trans person with 'normal' pronouns to go 'you make us look like jokes!' or 'not all queer people are like THOSE freaks!' when faced with, say, someone like me: the loveless aroace, m-spec boybutch multi-agender individual who uses neopronouns and xenogenders.
Making cishet society question their ideas of sexuality and gender does not end at Kevin the monogay trans man with he/him pronouns. While that is more digestible than m-spec lesbians and gays and, god forbid, lesboys and turigirls, sweeping these very real queer experiences under the rug to make yourselves more palatable to cishets just makes things worse for queer people. You are only fighting for the acceptance of part of the community, and you're leaving the rest of us in the dirt.
people who are hated and invalidated by even other queer people, stay alive.
if you want to enforce rules on everyone's sexuality and gender, I think you'd get along very well with queerphobic conservatives as you have similar interests. You'd just have to make sure they don't stop seeing you as one of the good ones and you'll be fine... probably. Just continue throwing the rest of the queer community under the bus and I'm sure they'll tolerate you for a little bit.
'oh, so I'm a queerphobe now because I think xenogenders and neopronouns are fake?' yes.
'I'm queerphobic because I think mspec lesbians, turigirls, and the like are invalid and appropriating the labels of lesbian, bi etc?' yes.
what you are doing is misunderstanding a queer identity, failing to enlighten yourself, and weaponizing your own ignorance against a queer person and painting them as the problem. You are writing off the existence of a queer person because you don't understand, or maybe do not even want to understand, their identity. You brush it off as fake and nonsensical. You think it's appropriating your own experience.
That is precisely what transphobes do to all trans people, what transmeds do to the 'wrong' type of trans person. That is precisely what homophobes do to all lesbians and gay men. Make no mistake, that bigotry affects you too no matter how much of a 'good' or 'correct' trans person/gay person you are. And if you are an ally espousing this kind of blatantly queerphobic rhetoric, I hope you feel ashamed. Where you claim to be in support of the LGBTQ community, you throw certain members of it under the bus because it's too much for you. You don't get to make that call; you either support all queer people in their identities, or you do not support queer people. That makes you queerphobic.
because the very possibility of men being involved in someone's lesbianism is enough for the baby TERFs in lesbian spaces to lose their shit. There's definitely misogyny in gay spaces but jesus christ is the anti man crowd of lesbian 'feminists' really loud.
why is it so much harder for people to accept bi lesbians than bi gays
so I got an 'anti good faith identities' blog recommended to me. Tumblr, what makes you think I, a user of good faith identities and hardcore supporter of those who do, want to see something like that on my dash? I mean, hey, it's a free report and block in the very least, but I'm here to enjoy my stay thank you very much.
Hi, thanks for wanting to learn! Honestly, as a man adjacent person who lives as a man, my interest in women has never stopped feeling queer despite my relationship with manhood, and my connection with the lesbian label has not ever really gone away even as I started figuring out the specifics of my sexuality such as my place on the aroace and multi spectrums. I experience the split attraction model too, so I consider myself an aroace m-spec lesboy as well as aroace m-spec gay. Have you ever heard of 'everyone who is into me is gay'? It's like that but more 'it feels gay no matter who I'm talking about'.
I really want some m-spec gays & lesbians and turigirls and lesboys to talk to me about why they use those labels. (if you're comfortable)
I'm freshly out of a friendgroup that was anti "contradictory" labels and am trying to break that thought process.
Also because I may or may not be having a sexuality crisis but that's besides the point
how about instead of siding with queerphobes with this 'invalid' shit we as a community actually start behaving like a community. Ya know, like uplifting your fellow queer individuals and standing up for them instead of crucifying them for their identity you don't understand. Stop siding with a cishet queerphobe when the target is a 14 year old with nounself pronouns, or an adult lesboy with xenogenders, or, or, or. Stop acting like your identity is the only one worthy of respect.