Pro Xenogender - Tumblr Posts

; hi !! Neopronoun user here :]]

; " what are neopronouns ? "

; neopronouns are pronouns that are not the usual he / she / they !! They're generally for trans or non-binary ( and everyone under those umbrellas ) people to use, but anyone can use them !! For most people they're a form of self expression or a way to further personalize their experience and to feel more comfortable w themselves. :]

; " when and where do they originate from ? "

; I don't know the history 100%, but to my knowledge: the oldest recorded use of a neopronoun was where William H Marshall documented the use of the pronoun " a " !! And a later use in around the late 1970s where the pronoun " le " was introduced among other attempts at normalizing gender neutral terminology and pronouns. But it died out pretty quickly .. Although it's gained more popularity ( plus the use of nounself pronouns, emojiself, etc ) from the birth of the modern internet, especially with apps like Tumblr !! Mainly they became more recognized in the 2010s !! :] This is js brief though, as I'm still learning more about them and their history !!

; " when and why did neopronouns become more popular recently ? "

; as I mentioned they gained traction around the 2010s among apps like Tumblr, etc. With the LGBTQIA+ community becoming more accepted and wide spread. Plus queer rights, especially trans rights, being passed and accepted. People were no longer ( in most big countries / cities .. Still a lot of places fight for rights, and it's of course and ongoing battle. ) fighting for the right not to be killed for simply existing outside, people had more opportunity to explore their identities and not have to worry ( too much ) about being ridiculed and unaccepted. So neopronouns naturally kind of came into discussion, and since so many people adored and related with them, they became more and more popular !! :]

; " why do you feel more comfortable using these pronouns instead of i.e. they / them ? "

; personally I think they're just fun, and my gender is- complicated, I relate this to my neurodivergency and I find it hard to always 100% relate to " stiff " pronouns like they / he / she, they just make me feel odd sometimes. So when I found out about neos, they made me feel 10x more comfortable, and I get a boost of joy whenever ppl use them for me. I also adore finding / making pronouns for things I like, it's something about my person I can freely customize, so why wouldn't I ?

; " how do you come up w these pronouns ? "

; to be honest I usually search for neo lists ( lists of neos already made by someone else ) or ask for recommendations !! But picking them out is like .. Picking an outfit to wear, I enjoy aspects of it and I like how it feels as a whole, it also might describe me as a person or I resonate with it. Some are simply for fun, because again, they bring me joy :]]

; " to ppl who add more and more neos supposedly js to spite an anti-neo person, are they truly comfortable w these pronouns, or are they just using them to spite others ? "

; I can't speak for everyone, but personally ( and what majority thinks ) it's more of a joke !! Obviously I do get a little spiteful joy out of it, but that's more because I know their hate is coming from a, purposeful or not, uneducated stance. So I'm not offended, I js find it amusing that they waste so much time being hateful on something that's really not a big deal. But of course I'm comfortable w the pronouns, I wouldn't use them otherwise ?? /nm /gen

; " do you use these pronouns irl ? "

; so I haven't come out as any form of trans / enby so pronouns haven't been discussed, I doubt I'd tell my family ( possibly siblings but .. ) since they're not the most supportive and it'd be unsafe for me. BUT, I would use them irl. And if I had friends irl I'd want them to be used on me ! I have full intention of using these in real life, and I know of plenty of people who use them outside of the internet as well !! They're our pronouns, not js fun internet accessories ( generally speaking ofc !! Everyone's got a slightly different opinion :] )

; " how do you use pronouns like bunny / bunnyself in a sentence ? "

; they'd be used like " This is *name* ! Bunny is a close friend of mine, and I really enjoy bunnys company. Bunny really knows how to take care of bunnyself ! " Although some peoples sets vary person to person, so it's best to ask if you're unsure !!

; " how do you get around ungrammatically correct pronouns, that could make ppl uncomfortable because they're not grammatically correct ? "

; honestly I've never encountered this issue .. But how I personally would handle it is simply tell them to use another set ! Since I'm A) okay with any neos and B) have a lot of other personal favourites that'd work better and make them feel more comfortable ! And if it really came down to it, I'm also okay with he / they, so they could always use those instead of neos. :]

; " how do you pronounce pronouns like xir / xem / ey ? "

; xir is usually pronounced like zer .. Xem is zem, and ey would be ae !! Of course if you're ever unsure, it's always fine to ask !!

; " do you agree or disagree that neos are harmful to trans people ? "

; disagree !! While I understand neopronouns are defiantly hated and ridiculed a lot .. So are trans people in general, neos or not trans people will be ridiculed by transphobes !! And majority of people who use neos are trans ( or under that umbrella / nonbinary ) we're in this fight together. Hating each other and turning against each other isn't helping anyone. Neos aren't embarrassing and they aren't hurting the community, what's hurting the trans community is transphobes. They're the problem, not people using different words to refer to themselves for comfort / whatever !! :] /nm /nay

; " if hypothetically neos were causing harm to trans people, what would you do ? "

; I'm not really comfortable answering such a hypothetical !! Although in general if something is supposedly harming the trans community I'd do research on it, and if it's especially harmful, advocate against it .. But neopronouns aren't hurting anyone. So this is an unnecessary question !! /nm

; " what can people do to make you feel more comfortable ? "

; kind of you to ask !! I think really js using my neopronouns, with or without hesitation .. It always makes me feel so positive and welcomed when people do. And if they have questions, just ask !! I'd rather be asked a hundred questions a day then have someone make their mind up about me or something about me while uneducated, or start hating others about something they don't properly understand .. !! /nbh /gen

; " anything else you'd like to add ? "

; it's genuinely very thoughtful of you to ask this !! And also never be afraid of asking questions like these, even if you maybe get negative responses, it's really important to keep an open mind !! So yh, genuinely appreciate this :]

; ( hopefully these answered your questions well enough, and were understandable !! If not I'd be happy to answer any other questions through either DMs or my asks !! :D )

Can someone explain neopronouns to me?

This is genuine. I went through both the anti neopronouns tags and pro neopronouns tags, but neither explain their sides good enough. I have questions for both sides, and I want some genuine answers without people getting mad at each other. For people answering, I ask that you keep in mind that these are genuine questions. Please don’t get mad.

For people answering, you don’t have to answer all questions. I know some of these questions are pretty heavy.

For both/neutral to answer:

• What are neopronouns?

• When and where do they originate from?

• When and why did neopronouns become more popular recently?

For pro neopronouns/neopronoun users to answer:

• Why do you feel most comfortable with these pronouns instead of pronouns like they/them?

• How do you come up with these pronouns?

• I’ve seen posts of neopronoun users adding more and more pronouns to their profiles just to spite an anti-neopronoun person. Are they truly comfortable with those pronouns being used on them, or are they just doing it to spite these people?

• Do you use these pronouns in real life?

• If so, how do you get people to use your neopronouns in real life?

• How do you use neopronouns like bunny/bunnyself in a sentence?

• Neopronouns like paw/pawself don’t really make sense grammatically. And some people don’t like using grammatically incorrect sentences. How do you get around that, and how do you help people who are uncomfortable with using grammatically incorrect sentences?

• How do you pronounce pronouns like xir/xem/ey, or other pronouns similar to those?

• Some people think that neopronouns are causing harm to trans rights. They also think that neopronouns are making it harder for trans people to be taken seriously. Do you agree or disagree? If you disagree, can you explain how neopronouns are not causing harm?

• What would you do if, hypothetically, neopronouns were genuinely causing harm? Like they are causing harm to trans rights, like some people think they are?

• What can people do to help make you more comfortable?

• Any other things you would like to add?

For anti neopronouns to answer:

• Why are you uncomfortable with calling people by neopronouns?

• Are you alright with pronouns like xir/zen/ey etc.? If not, why?

• Alternatively, are you alright with pronouns such as void/voidself? If not, why?

• If you said that you were alright with one but not the other, why?

• Some languages don’t have gender neutral pronouns like English does, so there are neopronouns in other languages for gender neutral people. What are your thoughts on that?

• Some people think that neopronouns are causing harm to trans rights. They also think that neopronouns are making it harder for trans people to be taken seriously. Do you agree or disagree? If you agree, can you explain how neopronouns are causing harm?

• What would you do if, hypothetically, neopronouns aren’t causing harm? Like they had no effect on transphobia, like some people think they do?

• Any other things you would like to add?

To people that answer these questions, thank you so much for your response!

I don't know who needs to hear this, or if it will even reach an audience at all, but you're valid. I'm talkin about the people who are constantly told they aren't valid by their own community: the lesboys, mspecs and everyone of the like. Those of us with 'contradictory' identities. The people who use neopronouns, nounself pronouns, emoji pronouns, and/or xenogenders. You're just as valid as the people who fit neatly into simpler, more 'acceptable' and 'normal' identities. And don't let anyone tell you different.

I know it's hard. I've witnessed a pan lesbian get doxxed on Twitter all because they identified as such. You see, people like us aren't what's harming the community, but some people will try to make you feel that way. Try not to let it get to you.

Greetings and salutations to trans men who are lesbians. You aren't straight if you don't identify as such, and you're certainly not invalidating other experiences! There's no one way to experience being a trans man, nor is there a wrong way to express being a lesbian.

Hello and welcome to people who otherwise identify as lesboys for whatever reason! Are you multigender? Cool! butch who also considers themself a man? Tubular! Genderfluid? Rad! Man adjacent regardless of gender? Wicked! Keep being you!

Guten Tag, Guten Abend (good day, good evening) to gaybians! Don't let nobody tell you your identity is invalid. You're allowed to use all the labels that feel comfortable to you!

Make some noise for the people who use/identify with xenogenders! It's your gender, so do whatever you want with it! This includes those of us who are xenic adults, as well.

Can we get a warm welcome for endo systems? How about tulpas? You're not racist or ableist for having a different system origin! Mixed origin? Quoigenic? Any other type of origin? Y'all are rad, too. Keep being you.

Keep vibing, everyone I mentioned here, as well as those with any other good faith identities I missed!

God I'm so fuckin tired of trying to find new xenogender servers to join and almost all of them are anti mspec lesbian/gay, anti endo, or both. Like Jesus Fuckin Christ, dude.

Anyway, if you're xenic and are an mspec les/gay or endo system (or supportive of mspec les/gays AND endo systems), please feel free to join our server. Yeah I got ya, this is an ad/hj

⚠️new plan for joining, DM me for a link to the server, as I am too bad at keeping up with replacing the link here⚠️

Also we're age regressor friendly.

Exclusionists, please respect that this is a safe space, so keep your opinions to yourself and leave us alone. Thanks. <3

Plain text: Exclusionists, please respect that this is a safe space, so keep your opinions to yourself and leave us alone. Thanks. <3

Oh, and any contradictory label havers/supporters are allowed. This includes, but isn't limited to, lesboys and gaybians. Hope to see you there!

Edit: so we've had a few people join and then leave — not that that's an issue! — so I feel the need to explain how to get verified if that has been or is a problem for anyone. You go to the channel labeled 'rules-verification' and fill out the form by interacting with it. Once the form is accepted by a mod, you'll be verified. Please note that you have to have an account (It can be on any platform, not just tumblr) that we can look at to ensure that you're chill (as in, not an exclusionist): this is a security measure to help keep this space troll free. Thank you.

Another edit: heads up, our mod team gets inactive at times, meaning the verification process can get rather slow. Additionally, if you're likely to just up and leave, maybe don't join the server; I don't mean to vague anybody, but we've had people do that and it causes me slight to moderate stress when people just… leave.

Hey, if you're an adult who identifies with xenogenders, please know that you're not being immature or childish. It's not childish to feel like your gender is better represented by a constellation, feels more like an abandoned house, and sounds like that one specific song you've been listening to. It's not immature to see your gender as a dinosaur, or a neon radioactive cat.

The 'hey that person who's catgender is 15 years old and neurodivergent!' argument, while made with the intention of legitimizing xenogenders, doesn't do justice to ALL xenic experiences. I know multiple xenic adults. Hell, I knew someone who was, like, 26 at the time I was in contact with them. You're never too old to identify with one, two, or THOUSANDS of xenogenders. Please remember that.

-a xenic adult

[Banner ID: DNI system/queer exclusionists, TERFs/SWERFs, truscum/transmeds, anti recovery for harmful paraphilia, anti otherkin, anti self dx, pro cringe culture, pro-lifers, anti xenogender. A more detailed DNI is in my pinned post. End ID]

I adore this (not my term, I just thought it was cool asf)

The moment I discovered xenogenders the possibility of having a normal identity was shattered

I love stories like this. It illustrates how intolerance isn't as rampant in the real world as it is online.

Hey, for everyone saying xenogenders are chronically online: Today in psych class we talked about gender dysphoria and I got to illustrate my view of gender graphically. It looked like a venn diagram with four heavily overlapping circles - one of them was xenogender.

My class was ENTIRELY receptive to it. This receptiveness included a straight, cis, white, christian male who had never heard of it before. And he was totally cool with it! We even took two minutes going on about what our gender would be if we described it in xenic terms. My teacher said he'd be the point of a mountain that intersects with clouds in the sky. Another said a ball of lint. I said the ocean. Not one of us said it was "impossible" or "cringe" or any of that xenogender-phobic shit.

If you're xenogender you're valid. The world, the real, offline world thinks so too. What's "chronically online" and "cringe" is being full of hate.

Normalize xenogenders not being all cutesy and shit. Sure, the ones that do fit that description are valid ASF, it's just that people seem to get their panties in a twist when somebody makes a gender that isn't RainbowFlowerPup gender or something. They would probably try to cancel me after seeing The Section™️ in my hoard.

Some people are going to tie in dark things to their gender.

i relate to a lot of the things ive seen you posted/ said. i really just want a community that doesnt rip itself apart over harmless things. i wish i could be openly plural &experiment with my gender/identity without fear. radqueer sounds ... similar, but im scared to like,, go down that 'rabbit hole' (not saying its bad! just that ive heard there are some bad sides and it seems kinda extreme in some places, but i wouldnt know since i havent actually interacted out of fear) (dont feel pressured to answer or give advice for this!! just wanted to share me thoughts :3)

There are definitely parts of the radqueer community that are... unsavory in the least, so it's important to keep safe by avoiding more extreme spaces or navigating them with caution. As for me, I really only get bothered when the possibility of actual nonconsensual harm is happening, and while there are people in that community who claim things like saying children can't consent is ageist (????) there are also people who are just trying to live. It's a very nuanced situation, and as someone who has went out of hir way to interact with the community and poke around, I've found that there are swell people and the entire community isn't some evil kid grooming factory like people have claimed. That all being said, the safest place to start is transID. As far as I know, radqueer isn't just transID. It's basically 'live and let live' in every sense of the word, so while spaces are accepting of things like mspec les/gays/monos and lesboys/turigirls, alterhumanity, nontraumagenic systems etc, they also support things that people would consider bad, such as labeling paraphilias as sexualities, all transIDs including those who are transharm for whatever reason, etc. (I personally don't have much of an issue with these things. Again, as long as nonconsensual harm isn't happening, I don't give a rat's ass what people do). However, this varies from person to person though the general acceptance and letting people exist is consistent.

I hope this helped at least a little bit, anon, and stay safe when exploring your identity. There are radically inclusive spaces (not the same thing as radqueer) that can be infinitely useful for self exploration, but as I've noticed, if you have the audacity to be transID you will be crucified and/or pushed out of those spaces. Still, though, it may be a good place to start, even if you have to weed out the anti endo spaces in the mix of 'radinclus' servers and dance around the transID bush.

it's so irritating to me to see stuff like 'xenogender playlists' and it's all cutesy and upbeat. there never seems to be representation for the xenics like me with darker genders... hell, even the main flag is cutesy. I get that if you were to try to capture every way someone can be xenic in one playlist, it'd be a clusterfuck of a playlist. But if it were up to me, there'd be more xenogender playlists with metal and shit, or at least stuff that wasn't just overly preppy and 'uwu'. I may actually make a playlist (chances are I will never actually make a playlist) that matches my gender better because I feel so unrepresented that I have to take things into my own hands.