You Ignore Me Because You Hate Me. Admit It. Now. Go. Vamos

you ignore me because you hate me. admit it. now. go. vamos

I get how you feel. It's kinda scary having to wonder if someone's okay or not, and it can be pretty triggering for some people to have to hear about those things.

However, the main reason (as far as I am aware) why suicidal people or those with self harm struggles interact with NSO content is because NSO contains themes of self harm and other mental health struggles, and it can be relatable for people with similar struggles or find the game comforting.

W can assure you that most of us are okay, and if you are concerned about our wellbeing's, feel free to ask us about it.

Again, we apologize for the concern. /gen

PS, please don't report our accounts. We understand the concern, but there are a few reasons why we need to have our accounts.

A lot of us use our blogs as a coping mechanism since a lot of us don't have other coping mechanisms, and sadly there is a lot of stigma surrounding mental health which can make it difficult to find healthier coping mechanisms (it's not easy being mentally ill, i'll tell you that.).

In addition, some of our accounts (including mine for example) are reviewed by or recognized by professionals as a way to get our emotions out of our system (kind of like a diary), so if our account gets terminated, we lose that coping mechanism.

I don't mean to be rude when I say this btw, but just letting you know.

I might stop posting NSO content. My last few posts have been reblogged by multiple accounts that are centred on self harm and suicidal thoughts. I’ve had to report a few people because I legitimately thought they were in danger.

10/15/2024

---

Today I went to Walmart with my mom to get some groceries, and while we were in the bakery section, I saw some really pretty flowers. Roses, sunflowers, I think a couple of lilacs.. Just beautiful ones.

I know I'm aromantic, but I really wish a boy bought me a bouquet of flowers to make me feel special. I wished they kissed me on the cheek too while they were at it.

Why can't I get that kind of love without something coming in and fucking it up?

god I hate being single....

"It's no big surprise you turned out this way, When they closed their eyes and prayed you would change, And they cut your hair and sent you away, You stopped by my house the night you escaped, With tears in my eyes, I begged you to stay, You said, 'Hey, man, I love you, but no fucking way' " ~Twin Size Mattress by The Front Bottoms

Still find it hard to believe that people forget I had to deal with a lot of long term trauma and it's manifested into this disorder that completely distorts my perceptions of relationships and self image and will display shitty behavior because of said disorder impacting me in some way.

10/11/2024 - 10/12/2024, 12:20 AM

---

You wanna know what's worse than being a sexual assault victim?

Having someone accuse you of being a sexual assault victim when you never had any sexual encounters with anyone in your lifetime (as least nothing physical)

Literally just a few minutes ago, I was getting ready for bed, and the cops came over to my house. At first I thought "oh shit, did a car crash happen" since it's pretty common for accidents to happen at the intersection near my house.

Turns out, someone saw my advertisement saying that I was looking for a relationship (I am still looking for a partner btw, please check out that post if anyone's interested), and got so mad at me wanting to be in a relationship that they reported me to the police telling them that I was assaulted.

I want to make it clear: I was never sexually assaulted, nor do I recall being groomed by any particular person. I am simply a very horny femcel who had unrestricted internet access as a kid. There is no need to call the fucking cops on my ass at 11pm on a friday night because you're mad that I actually want a partner.

I feel like the "anonymous" person who did this was an ex friend that I split from weeks ago because they got all pissy at my vent blog n shit.

So here's my little message to them since they seem to love stalking my account (very long read, sorry):

---

Gerard, just leave me the fuck alone Already.

You already ruined what we had when you not only ignored me for SEVERAL MONTHS on end and ignored my every attempt to try and communicate with you in the way I knew how to, but you then only came to me to complain that I was showing mentally ill traits that i can NOT control and traits you KNEW came from years of trauma that distorted my perception of relationships to where I would be willing to put myself in harm's way just to feel loved, and when you reported me to the fucking police, you basically killed any hope of me rebuilding a relationship with you.

Something I learned is that when you finally grow from being a child into being a teen, friendships and connections are very important for your development, and since I was your mostly stereotypical SPED kid with little to no social experience, I never got that, and therefore I idolized every friend I ever had up until I was about 14 years old (and even then I still had a lot of trust in them because I was so dependent on them to keep myself from being isolated forever.)

I believed that you loved me and cared about me for years, when we hung out, it felt like I was in one of those beautiful slice-of-life animes where the main character is having the best experience they could ever have. I was happy. The only exception to that was when I first developed a crush on Skyler and therefore developed homicidal thoughts against you (I didn't know it wasn't normal until years later), but even then, she got me to open up to you and love you again.

And guess what you did?

you took that trust, the trust of a venerable person with no social skills, and you just threw it out the window, like it was never important to anyone. And that fucking hurts honestly.

If i'll be honest, if I really was groomed like you are having everyone believe, then you are the groomer. You did this to me.

Just admit what has been exposed already and what everyone knows: you do not care about me or my wellbeing, you NEVER cared at all now that I think about it, and if you think that I still care for you after what you done, oh boy are you delusional (and not in the mentally ill way either). I wouldn't care if you died atp, you mean nothing to me anymore. I do not love you. If anything, I hate you.

I know there is nothing I can say to change your mind on me, but honestly, I fucking hate you, and I should've never trusted you.

I hope you fucking rot in hell you asshole. Thanks to your dumbass, my whole family now thinks that someone raped me or some shit, and it's probably on my legal record now too.

Just block me already and never try to contact me. I never want to see you again.

---

this but instead of just my parents it's also the american school system (and school had a greater impact on me btw)

Also my ex friends manipulated me for years and are pissed that I know the truth about them.

How come parents just casually neglect you in your childhood, purposefully get you addicted to your device and are now crying because of how their child turned out, as if it wasn’t completely their fault