Borderline Pd - Tumblr Posts
I want to have friends so so baaad-
But then I realize that I have a very low social battery and I feel like I'm going to faint from tiredness after every little interaction
BPD culture is falling in love with some 36 year old man on the internet and having fantasies about him being your boyfriend because he's the only one that genuinely understands how you feel and what you've been through, even though you're aware that he's done some really bad things that he should be held accountable for and you've never had a direct interaction with him in your entire life
(looking at you, Yandere Dev)
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the amount of vilification i see online about bpd is so heartbreaking. people constantly saying to run like hell and that bpd partners will always be abusive and toxic. i love my partner but im afraid she’ll come to feel that way too.
omg maybe life is worth living [i had a decent day] —> i cannot be saved [the slightest inconvenience occurs] —> i am a fucking god and everyone loves me [someone laughed at my joke] —> i am going to kill myself [i feel a little bit unwanted because of someone’s reaction]
and this shit just goes on and on and NEVER stops
THIS!
Literally I'm tired of people pretending to be supportive n shit whenever I disclose my bpd diagnosis, and then turn around and get all pissy when I show an actual sign of BPD
LITERALLY JUST SAY YOU HATE PEOPLE WITH BPD AND STFU.
sorry for showing symptoms of the disorder i told you multiple times I have. Do you want me to kill myself?
nobody will understand how badly it hurts when you wither everything you touch and lay waste wherever you step.
I feel so fucking disconnected from reality atp i don't know what to do anymore
i get so angry when someone finds out I have bpd and they all of the sudden are sexually attracted to me PLS MAKE IT LESS OBVIOUS YOU GET OFF TO THE CRAZY GIRL STEREOTYPE
you know it’s getting bad again when it’s harder not to relapse, every little things annoys the shit out of you, you want to crawl out of your skin, the distractions don’t help anymore and not even your favorite special little treat makes your day better
i can't tell what true love or hate feels like. whenever i think i have an idea of how i feel, i look back later realizing that i was splitting again.
This but instead it's just the most random bullshit either that or my negative perception of relationships or myself lmao
I hate disassociating during class. I go from “the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell” to “I’m not real, none of this is real, we’re all dead somewhere or in a simulation.”
I need a big red circle and arrow around me that says “sensitive. will cry” like some sort of shitty clickbait YouTube video
i’m ready to kill myself i was kinda just hoping i could maybe have sex before i die tho
"just learn to tolerate things" if i hear that shit come out of your mouth one more time I am going to hit you with a brick, fuck you.
I hate whenever people tell me that I "struggle with tolerating things" or how I "get triggered whenever someone has an opinion that's not 100% like yours", because while it is objectively true, people forget that i canNOT control this shit.
I stopped tolerating shit because i had people constantly manipulate and exploit me to the point it basically killed my wellbeing, it's LITERALLY a trauma response.
And the black-and-white thinking is because, get this: IT'S A PART OF MY FUCKING DISORDER, ONE OF THE MAIN CRITERIA ACTUALLY.
Also, saying that I get all pissy at someone not 100% agreeing with an opinion i have is a bit of a stretch. I can tolerate someone not 100% agreeing with me, I'm not that close-minded, however, what i DON'T tolerate is someone being a genuine asshole about their opinion and/or actively attempting to trigger me on purpose. (*COUGH COUGH* The Tony Crynight sever Incident)
Seriously, people act like I don't constantly argue with people online..
Anyway, probably gonna show this blog to my therapist (because at least SHE knows how I fell and at least I can actually trust her..)
your tone changed your tone changed your tone changed just say you hate me
i don't know what I want to do with my life. I'm scared, I don't want to do anything. I don't have a strong passion. Maybe I'm not even a real person.
Just let me curl up in a bed and sleep for an eternity...
Hell
learned that lesson the hard way.
just a reminder that it is not normal to think of ways to kys whenever an inconvenience occurs