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Do you have any cheap ways to feel more feminine?

hey there 🤍

here are some of my personal tips on how you can feel more feminine for little to no money!

1. ask for help/ let people do things for you. when things get tough, don’t let your pride get in the way of asking people you trust for help. people are out there that are willing to help you and do things for you if you only ask. be open to others doing for you, even if someone just goes out of their way to open a door for you or get something from a high shelf for you.

i know it might not seem like a big deal, but it’s more masculine to do for yourself and not ask for any help. asking for help doesn’t mean you’re weak. it takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable and ask for help.

2. update your hair and makeup routine. using the products you have already, practice your hair and makeup. learn how to maintain your hair and create hairstyles that compliment your face. also learn how to do your makeup to enhance your natural beauty. you don’t need to go out and buy tons and tons of expensive makeup or top shelf hair products, what you have is more than good enough.

there are tons of youtube videos and articles that can help you learn these skills. they’re fun and will boost that feeling of femininity within you.

3. become more comfortable with your body. i don’t want this to sound corny, but i think you should spend time appreciating and loving the body you’re in. i understand that getting comfortable with your body is a long process, but don’t give up on yourself.

watch yourself while you dance in the mirror, get acquainted with your body by looking at yourself and identify some things you love about yourself.

4. take a bubble bath. fill the tub up with your favorite scented bubbles. sprinkle in some bath salts. top it’s off with some flower petals and get ready to luxuriate. i’d also recommend lighting a candle or two and turning off the lights to reinforce that beautiful blissful me-time. turn on a soothing playlist and have something to sip on, whether it be tea, juice, or champagne.

having a self care moment like this will reinforce to yourself that you are worthy of the best treatment and it doesn’t have to be reserved for special occasions exclusively.

5. walk that walk and talk that talk. remember: you are that girl. you always will be that girl. and you’re never going to stop being that girl. how you carry yourself and how you speak is indicative of how you see yourself. walk and speak with confidence in yourself and your abilities.

i’ve said this before but i’ll continue to say it because it’s simply the easiest way to tap into your feminine power: walk with your shoulders back, chest out, and chin up. speak clearly, and confidently, and to be understood. it does wonders for how you feel and look at yourself.

daily habits that are making me feel much better this 2024

waking up very early

if you are a person who finds it difficult to get up early you can achieve this by getting up an hour earlier than usual, you'll notice the difference.

journaling

it's my favorite habit and i do it every morning and before going to sleep, it also helps me in moments when I'm not feeling well to feel better and see things from a different perspective. on amazon there are many journals with questions already formulated to answer every morning and every night, highly recommended! i've been doing this since october last year and i noticed a big difference.

listen/watch personal growth videos/podcasts every day

it's not necessary to spend all day consuming this content but every day i like to learn something new or just reaffirm something i already know to make it stronger. watching content like this helps to replace old beliefs with new ones that are more beneficial and healthy. plus the people who make this content usually have a really good vibe. i love listening to this while i'm at the gym.

break with the routine once or twice a week

i mean do something different from what you can normally do, for example, I love to go out to a coffee shop have my favorite drink while listening to music, and spend some time on pinterest looking for inspiration, not only pictures but i also find very interesting things that i can apply in my day to day life!

listening to frequencies to raise my vibration

i have realized that this is very powerful and it is very important to have a high vibration, one of the most important reasons for me is that i have realized that besides having more mental calm and fewer worries is that low vibrational thoughts do not enter my mind, so to speak. examples of frequencies: 528hz, 432hz, 111hz. on youtube there are many. crystal bowls are also one of my favorites.

getting out of my comfort zone

the first week of this new year didn't make much difference to me and sometimes we expect things to change suddenly, and this can happen but it doesn't always happen right away. this week i have been much less resistant to making changes in my life and having a new schedule with an improved routine has made me feel much better.

be more present. think/act as my best version would act

this is very powerful. it is typical to act on autopilot and many times i was not fully aware of some habits i had that were harming me to a greater or lesser extent or of the things i was thinking. this doesn't mean that sometimes you have to do something you don't like, it's just another experience at the end of the day, but i mean to stop consuming content or doing things that don't help me to be the version i want to be and also to be more present, enjoying my day no matter what happens tomorrow.

besides all this, exercise, healthy and balanced eating, meditation are also important to me, but these are things that i always mention because they are part of my life and i wanted to contribute something new to serve as inspiration for others.

you don't have to do everything on the list but maybe something of what I have written catches your attention, you implement it in your life and it starts to improve significantly. that has happened to me.

This year my focus is on 3 things, my body, my finances, and my natural beauty.

So if you see me looking crazy, with no makeup on, hair in low manipulation styles and refusing to buy new clothes…mind your business.

It’s all part of the process.

BECOMING THE WOMAN YOU WANT

Imagine the woman you want to become. Envision her embracing a lifestyle woven with healthy habits that radiate positivity and well-being. Picture her waking up early, greeting the day with gratitude, and setting intentions that shape her mindset for success.

In her daily routine, she prioritizes self-care—nourishing her body with wholesome meals, staying hydrated, and indulging in regular exercise that she genuinely enjoys. Whether it's a morning yoga session, an evening run, or a dance class, physical activity is not a chore but a celebration of what her body can achieve.

This woman values the power of mindfulness. Picture her taking moments throughout the day to breathe deeply, practice meditation, or simply appreciate the present. It's in these mindful pauses that she finds clarity, resilience, and a profound connection with herself.

As she moves through her day, healthy habits extend into her work life. This woman is organized and efficient, using time management techniques to tackle tasks without feeling overwhelmed. Regular breaks and moments of reflection help her maintain focus and creativity.

Evenings are a sanctuary for winding down. She cherishes a good night's sleep, prioritizing rest as a cornerstone of her well-being. Unplugging from screens, engaging in calming activities, and maintaining a consistent sleep schedule contribute to the rejuvenation her body and mind need.

Remember, becoming her doesn't happen overnight. It's a gradual process, a collection of intentional choices and persistent efforts. Start incorporating these healthy habits, step by step, and watch as you evolve into the empowered, balanced woman you aspire to be. 🌿💪🌺🌟

Survival 101 :

Buckle up your seatbelt darling because this is going to be triggering and one hell of a ride. Don't expect mushy from me. Might do it when tapped in my soft girl era but today I feel like a Villain.

1) Keep your mouth shut where you don't hold the power. No power no expressed opinions that can put you in trouble.

2) Learn manipulation and seduction skills. This will help you to detect when someone is trying to manipulate and seduce you. Saves a lot of drama and heartache.

3) Fight back strategically. We don't want to lose a job, a degree certificate, a bruise on your body,etc depending on your situation.

4) Facts over emotions. Always.

5) 90% of older men are creepy. Speaking from experience here. Play with them by ear. Get what you want by being polite and respectful but if they try to harass you or take advantage we turn Medusa on them or if you are not in a position to fight and walk out safe just play cutesy and shy and dumb. Ask him what he means and do not take a word said by him seriously. Dodge his advances like your life depends on it until you get an opening to run for the hills.

6) Snap out of delusions and pay attention to reality. People are not what you make them out to be they are what they show you. Stop making excuses for them.

7) Anxiety can be crippling. Panic attacks are the worst but no matter what happens try your level best to never show them publicly. Men are vultures and vulnerable women are easy prey for men.

8) That one friend who is all sweet to you and is your bff but anything positive happens in your life and suddenly starts becoming passive aggressive. Not your friend. Don't share any secrets. Best to be kept as an acquaintance.

9) Develop sarcasm and don't be afraid to put self entitled bitches and bastards in their place. Better being called a 'Mean Girl' over a 'Doormat'.

10) Bully back the bullies. It's 2024 sweetie we don't wait for an opportunity for revenge we fucking create it.

11) No matter how tough your life is going everyone shouldn't be getting a broadcast about it. At least not by your own mouth. Try to act as put together as you can.

12) Kindness is virtue but being apathetic saves you. Don't be the fool who bleeds through the stabs of the same knives again and again. "Because I can't see them in pain. I have a heart." Babygirl you have a life too. All that emotional stress is going to result in some serious problems in the upcoming years.

13) Learn when to quit. The most emotionally intelligent people I know are great quitters. They know when it's the end of an era.

14) Never disclose your family issues to outsiders. Until and unless a person has proved their loyalty to you year after year only those selected one or two people should know your domestic issues. Anyone else knowing it is like having a good gossip for tea time.

15) Lastly, there are no fucking saviours in real life. You are your own saviour.

originally made this plan for myself but all the Q&A sessions on instagram made me want to share it with you.

everyone, let's do our best and have fun. no pressure and don't take it too seriously. Come on ig if you want more action, details and examples.

starting the week in a good mood

weekly review and preview

on sunday evening or monday morning, take some time to review the past week's accomplishments and reflect on what went well and what could be improved. then, preview the new week's schedule and tasks. this will help you be mentally prepared for what's ahead and adjust your plans if needed.

set weekly priorities

determine a top three to five priorities for the week and keep your focus aligned with your most important goals, making you more prone to have adequate time and resources to them throughout the week.

organize your workspace

it's very important to start monday with a clean and organized desk, anyone who already did it knows well. being physically organized helps reduce stress and improve your ability to focus and be productive.

create a motivational ritual

my favorite! begin your week with a motivational ritual. this could be reading an inspiring quote, listening to a particular song that uplifts you, or writing down somethings you are grateful for.

initiate a positive interaction

our first steps through the day can really affect the mood of our whole day (it's scientifically proven!!), so try starting your week with a positive interaction with your family, friends or colleagues. this, aside from maintaining a good relationship and being good to everybody, will also boost your mood.

start with a small win

choose a small, manageable task in the very beginning of monday and complete it. it'll give you an immediate sense of achievement and set a positive tone for the rest of the week.

stop ignoring yourself. fix your posture, get a fresh haircut, drink water, take care of your skin, eat food that gives you energy, declutter your space, take time to rest, workout, do mindful meditation, fix your sleep schedule. when you feel/look good, you do good. invest in yourself, put the effort you deserve.

the secret of your future is hidden in your daily routine

stop ignoring yourself. fix your posture, get a fresh haircut, drink water, take care of your skin, eat food that gives you energy, declutter your space, take time to rest, workout, do mindful meditation, fix your sleep schedule. when you feel/look good, you do good. invest in yourself, put the effort you deserve.

beauty tips?

Beauty Tips.

.... new habits, current go-tos, recent additions.

✿ gradual face tan and 1-2 drops carotene oil = 💋 from the sun

✿ sexy stomach = tightening transverse abdominus + stomach vacuums + gua sha.

✿ increasing my hip as well as my shoulder mobility for an attractive gait.

✿ eliminating sweat: AHA regularly, antiperspirant (at night!), and drinking sage tea.

✿ targeted weightlifting and protein heavy diet and protein shakes for hot curves!

✿ starting hot yoga = it's body weight training + cardio + meditation all in one!

✿ socks in the evenings after applying my heavy cream for silky smooth skin.

✿ golden jewelry on bronzed skin is an absolutely stunning combination, no silver.

✿ adorning my body ♡ stacked rings + bracelets + a delicate anklet on my right foot.

✿ lots of PA+++ sunscreen, citrus perfume, my summertime drinks and snacks.

✿ french on the nails and french on the toes is an absolute necessity!

Secrets to the Arabian Princess Scent 💐🧴🪷

So with Arab perfumes becoming popular in the West due to their strong projection and beautiful smell, and the Arab world becoming known for our knowledge on how to smell good af, I (a half Moroccan) am going to reveal some other ways we ensure we smell amazing to the girlies on Tumblr who are interested in Arab perfumes or just in generally smelling amazing 😍 Most tips are Moroccan but many apply to the Arab world in general (under the cut because this turned into a long post) ✨💞💐

1) Good Eating Habits: When my mother moved here to Europe, she was immediately struck by how the people seemed to smell like "pig." And that's no coincidence. You are what you eat, so coming from a country where nobody eats pig to one where everyone eats it, of course you're going to be struck by people smelling like it from the inside out. Not just that, but in the Arab world, it's also way less common for people to eat takeout and drink alcohol, whereas in many parts of the West, these things are a normal part of many people's diets and affects their natural scent. A lot of Arabs have also talked about how Westerners smell like "milk," and this is because Westerners tend to consume more dairy products than people in the East do. It's also common for Arabs to eat fruit as dessert instead of having cakes or cookies all the time (although speaking of cookies and cakes, the scents of rosewater, orange blossom water, almonds, honey, vanilla, oranges and lemons commonly used in Arab baking fill up the house with a wonderful smell while they're baking). Teas made from various herbal infusions are popular throughout the Arab world. Spearmint, peppermint, sage, cardamom, cinnamon, hibiscus, chamomile, anise, and thyme are commonly used to flavor tea in MENA. Dried lime tea is drunk in the Arabian Peninsula. Coffee flavoured with cardamom is also common. I especially like Turkish coffee. Spices like cinnamon, cardamom, and cloves are commonly used in cooking, and the scent of them can cling to your clothes and hair. Herbs like mint and parsley, which have natural deodorising properties, are often used in meals.

I'm not saying that you need to cut any foods out in order to smell good, but you should consider reducing the amounts of unhealthy foods and red meats you eat, and make sure to drink plenty of water and eat veggies and fruit daily.

2) Keeping a Clean House: Here in Ireland, a lot of people don't clean their houses every day. I know multiple people that only clean their floor once a week, and have a couple of neighbours who don't do much cleaning themselves and just have a housekeeper visit to clean once a week. But in Morocco, people clean daily. The home is also deep cleaned once a week, we even wash the walls. We don't wear shoes inside, and not just that, but we also have different slippers specifically for wearing inside the bathroom. Living in a clean space is important for smelling good, because no matter what you do, you'll always end up smelling like wherever you live due to spending so much time there. The scent will cling to your clothes and hair. Which means if your house smells dirty, you will also smell dirty.

As well as making sure the house is clean, Arabs also make it smell pretty with extras. For example, in Morocco it's common to burn incense or bakhour (perfumed wood chips), and the scent permeates your clothes. People also keep pieces of musk in their wardrobes (wrapped in a handkerchief). It come in scents like orange blossom, jasmine, amber, sandalwood, chamomile and lavender. An unused bar of soap or a sachet of potpourri in your wardrobe will do the same job though if you can't or don't want to buy musk. The musk can also be used as a scented wax melt, a home scent (you just leave it in a bowl), a body perfume (rub it on your skin), a hair perfume (rub on your palms and run through the hair), or to scent bathwater. Solid perfume made from natural ingredients has the same effect. I like Lush Rose Jam solid perfume, as it smells like sweet roses and Turkish delight, and a little goes a long way.

Specific to Marrakech, you can buy jasmine balls which you just leave around the house (if you're not in Marrakech, you can just leave potpourri or dried flowers and herbs in sachets on your desk, bedside table, etc). The Marrakech herbal shops also sell sandalwood bark which you burn. Oud and amber are also burned. Herbs like lavender are sprinkled under carpets and rugs so the scent rises as they're stepped on.

3) Personal Hygiene: In the Arab world, people shower daily. In Morocco, we also go to the hammam (public bath) once a week, and we sit in the sauna room, and then rub our bodies with sabon beldi (black soap), a natural soap made from olive oil and black olives, leaving it on for a few minutes before rinsing it off. Then we scrub our skin with a kessa glove after it's marinated. Exfoliating dead skin regularly makes perfume cling to you better (if you order Korean bath towels from Amazon, they're very similar to Moroccan kessa gloves and you use them in a similar way). Then after washing our hair, we use a ghassoul clay mask (some people also rub henna into their skin). After washing the clay off, many people rub rosewater or argan oil into their skin before heading to the relaxation area to enjoy refreshments. As well as helping us smell good, it also makes our skin incomparably soft. When my parents were newlyweds, my father remarked on how he'd never felt a woman with such soft skin in his life before. My mother attributes it to regularly using the hammams before moving here.

Obviously not everyone has access to a hammam, but you can create a similar experience at home. Just sit in a steamy hot shower for 10-15 minutes, wash your skin with a natural soap and leave it on for a few minutes before rinsing off and exfoliating with a glove. Then tone with rosewater and apply oil to your body.

Dukhan treatments (smoke baths) are practiced in Sudan. Married women and brides anoint themselves with oil, before sitting over a chair with a hole in the centre. Under the seat, there is a pit, in which acacia wood, frankincense, or other aromatic woods and resins are burned in a clay vessel.

As well as showering daily (and using the hammam regularly if you're Maghrebi), many people in the Arab world also perform wudu (ritual cleansing) five times a day before praying.

Alum was commonly used as a natural deodorant in the Arab world in the past, and some still use it today.

Bidets are also common in the Arab world. In the Northern Hemisphere they're uncommon, but it's easy to get a portable bidet (a small squeezable bottle with a nozzle) online.

We also wash our hands before meals, with a pitcher of water which is passed around the room. In Turkey, they use kolonya, made from fig blossoms, jasmine, rose, or citrus to disinfect their hands.

4) Fragrances, Lotions and Potions: In the Arab world, perfumes are incredible. They're oil-based, so they have excellent projection and longevity. The olfactory notes commonly used in them are beautiful too: delicate rosewater and orange blossom water, exotic oud, sweet amber, vibrant roses and jasmine. In Morocco, gardenia scents are popular, even among men.

Emirati perfumes are the most well known in the West and are super good. Some personal favourites of mine include Oud Mood by Lattafa (Caramel, rose, saffron, and oud), Fatima Pink by Zimaya (Sweet rose that smells like a bit like Turkish delight. it's a dupe of the French Parfums De Marly Delina, however, the actual Delina smells very similar to generic rose oil perfumes you can get in the Arab world to begin with so Zimaya was basically able to dupe it to a T. Their version lasts really long too), Ameerat Al Arab by Lattafa (jasmine, a hint of oud, slightly citrusy. Also the name means "Arabian Princess" in English), Fakhar Rose by Lattafa (sweet, fruity, and very floral) and Yara by Lattafa (floral, amber, vanilla and strawberry). I buy my perfumes from Dubai Perfume Shop in Dublin, but they can be easily found online. Some well-known Arab perfume houses include Lattafa, Al Rehab, Zimaya, Al Qurashi, Amouage, Afnan, Ajmal, Asdaaf, Al Haramain, Armaf, Kayali, Maison Alhambra, and Swiss Arabian, but there are hundreds more.

As well as sprayable perfume, perfume oil is also used. It usually comes in rollerballs or small containers, is inexpensive, and lasts for ages. Like spray perfume, it comes in a huge variety of scents. You can also put it in diffusers or add some to cotton balls and leave in your wardrobe to scent clothes and linens.

Arabs know when to wear perfumes. For example, a rich, sweet, strong oud and vanilla scent will be beautiful in colder weather. But in warm weather, it will become cloying and sickly. Musk, amber and saffron are popular in winter, while rose, orange blossom and jasmine are popular in summer.

In the Arab world, many stalls in the Medina sell gorgeous oils, fragrances and soaps that are inexpensive. For example, the musk I mentioned above. As well as making your home smell incredible, you can also rub it on your body and you'll smell good for days.

Rosewater is commonly used as a toner and to remove makeup. In the town of Skoura, where my great grandparents were from, men even use it to shave with! Orange blossom water is also used in Arab beauty routines in a similar way to rosewater. You can apply either to a bath for extra luxury.

Argan oil is commonly used in Morocco on both skin and hair, as well as the less well-known but just as good prickly pear oil (which is very high in vitamin E). Pure argan oil actually smells a bit stinky fyi, but for beauty, things like rose oil and menthol are commonly added, so it smells pretty good. Throughout the Middle East and North Africa, jasmine hair oil, castor oil and sweet almond oil (I like putting it in my baths and on my body) are easy to find. Usually Middle Eastern and South Asian shops in the West sell them too.

Honey and almond masks have been used since ancient times, and to this day are still popular. You can buy them basically anywhere. Homemade face masks made from honey and yoghurt or crushed figs and yoghurt are also used.

Aloe Vera is used to treat dry skin, acne, and sunburns. It has a cool and refreshing scent, perfect for the hot climate in many parts of the Arabian world. I like applying it after shaving as it's soothing, natural, and absorbs easily.

Frankincense, a resin used in the Middle East and North Africa for thousands of years, was traditionally used as a natural perfume. It's commonly used in incense. Frankincense oil is also good for the skin.

There are many beautiful scented soaps available in the Arab world. If you go to Turkish or Arab supermarkets, a lot of them will have a section where they sell hygiene products, including soaps with ingredients like argan, rose and oud, and olive oil. I've even found Syrian Aleppo soap before. You can just buy soaps from regular stores in scents like rose, jasmine, honey and almond, orange blossom and sandalwood for achieving that exotic scent though.

As well as using various oils, perfumes, and fragrant beauty treatments, Arab women also know how to layer these different scents to add dimension to them and avoid clashing. For example, a rose perfume over a vanilla lotion will always smell good. Other combinations that are good include almond and vanilla, rose and oud, rose and jasmine, lavender and lemon, rose and orange blossom, and orange blossom and vanilla. But there are many different combinations you can use to achieve a delicious scent that's unique to you.

I hope this was helpful, stay pretty ✨

Becoming the “It” girl: using science to redefine your identity

Hello friends,

A longer post today but I’m excited about this one!

I like to define an "It Girl" as someone who embodies the highest version of oneself, a created identity that reflects your most aspirational qualities and personal vision of success and confidence.

However, this post isn’t bout conforming to standards or expectations but rather embodying the best version of who you imagine yourself to be.

Today, I wanted to talk about how social science-based principles like self-presentation, cognitive dissonance, and identity alignment can help u become an“It Girl” in our own lives and achieve the identity you’ve been desiring.

What is identity

Our identity impacts all areas of our life; it’s the person we think we are and how we communicate that to others.

For example, if you see yourself as confident and capable, you are more likely to approach challenges with a positive attitude and take risks that lead to growth.

On the other hand, if you view yourself as unworthy, you are more likely to shy away from opportunities and not reach your full potential.

Our identity manifests as how we present ourselves to the world, including our body language, communication styles, and behavior.

In addition, our identities are constantly changing as we grow and evolve, influenced by our experiences, goals, and relationships with the people around us. This is why it’s important to continue to refine your personal brand and set standards for yourself to stay authentic.

Taking the time to evaluate our current identity and identifying areas where we can make changes is a good way to get aligned with our highest selves. We can ask ourselves questions such as:

How do I describe myself in three words?

What are my core values and beliefs?

How do I typically respond to challenges and setbacks?

What are my strengths and weaknesses?

How do I feel about my abilities and potential for success?

How do I present myself to others in social and professional settings?

What is my body language like in different situations (e.g., confident, reserved)?

How do I communicate with others (e.g., assertive, passive, aggressive)?

What kind of feedback do I receive from others about my behavior and attitude?

Do my actions align with the person I want to be?

How do I handle criticism and praise?

What goals do I have for personal and professional growth?

What is Self-Presentation?

Self-presentation involves the things we do to portray a particular image of ourselves; it’s how we dress, speak, behave, and present ourselves in different contexts. Our self-presentation is closely linked to our identity because it shapes how others perceive us, which can influence how we see ourselves.

Projecting the identity we want and living by our values and beliefs requires consistent management of our self-presentation. Our behaviors, thoughts, and emotions should reflect those of the identity we’re internalizing.

For example, if your identity is someone who is stylish, you’ll want to curate your wardrobe in a way that reflects that. In a similar context, if your new identity is someone who’s highly education you might start to spend some of your free time reading books, articles, newsletters, etc.

It’s all about helping to align how others see us with how we see ourselves.

Although other people’s opinions shouldn’t dictate our lives, a big part of our identity is shaped by how others view us. Their feedback can either affirm or refute what we’ve internalized to be true.

Here are some techniques for mastering self-presentation and how they can be used to access your highest self:

Dress in a way that reflects your identity, curate a wardrobe that matches who you aspire to be

Use confident body language, such as maintaining eye contact and standing/sitting upright in social settings

Practice speaking with clarity and confidence

Clean up your social media and only follow content that aligns with your identity or helps keep you on track

Establish and maintain boundaries without people in your life that reflect your values and priorities

Invest in personal and professional development through courses, workshops, and reading

Surround yourself with people and environments that support and reflect your highest self/new identity

Regularly express gratitude and maintain a positive outlook

Questions to evaluate and improve self-presentation

What are my core values and how do they influence my behavior?

How do I want others to perceive me?

Does my current wardrobe reflect the person I want to be?

What body language habits can I improve to appear more confident?

How can I improve my communication skills to better align with my desired identity?

In what ways can I be more consistent in how I present myself across different contexts?

What feedback have I received about my self-presentation, and how can I use it to improve?

Am I living in a way that aligns with my highest self, or are there areas where I can improve?

What actions can I take today to better project the identity I want?

How can I ensure my actions are authentic and reflect my true self?

How cognitive dissonance impacts us

Rebranding yourself and changing your identity involves leaving your old life behind. It sounds simple, but it can be very a mentally exhausting change. This is where cognitive dissonance comes into effect.

Cognitive dissonance is the psychological discomfort experienced when our actions conflict with our beliefs or values. If we’re not acting in accordance with our beliefs, we’ll end up with mental discomfort. As a result, we either end up changing our habits or our beliefs.

For example, if you see yourself as an active person but keep skipping the gym, high dissonance might make you change your belief instead of your habit. You might start telling routinely yourself, "It's just this once," rather than actually going.

This may sound stressful and prove to be a challenge during your rebrand. However, dissonance can play a positive role if you’ve strongly internalized a core aspect of your identity. For example, if you see yourself as someone health-conscious or someone who frequents the gym, you’ll consistently find ways to show that this is true, whether that’s going to the gym daily or meal prepping.

In terms of identity formation, when we highlight inconsistencies between our self-perception and our actions, we actually push towards more aligned behavior.

When we recognize that our actions don’t align with who we believe we are, we can use that discomfort to motivate positive change.

In combination with the tips previously mentioned, we can also:

Regularly evaluate our actions and beliefs to identify any discrepancies. Ask ourselves if our behavior aligns with our values and goals

Define specific, actionable steps that align with our desired identity. This can help create a guideline for behavior that supports us

Be willing to accept change and continue to grow and learn more about ourselves

So how can we apply these principles to become an “It Girl”

Define our "It Girl" identity:

Self-reflection: take time to reflect on who you want to be. Write down the qualities, values, and behaviors that define your highest self

Vision board: create a vision board (physical or digital) with images, words, and quotes that represent your ideal identity so that you’re constantly reminded of your goal

Align your self-presentation:

Wardrobe audit: go through your closet and sort items that don’t align with your desired identity. Also invest in pieces that make you feel confident and reflect your new persona

Body language: practice positive body language such as standing tall, maintaining eye contact in conversations

Use cognitive dissonance to your advantage:

Identify inconsistencies: regularly assess your actions and identify areas where they don’t align with your desired identity

Set goals: create specific, actionable goals to address these inconsistencies. For example, if you want to be healthier plan to incorporate more whole foods into your diet

Monitor progress: keep track of your progress and celebrate small wins to stay motivated

Cultivate positive habits:

Daily routines: establish daily routines that support your identity. This could include a morning exercise routine or a consistent skincare routine

Mindfulness practices: incorporate daily mindfulness practices like meditation or journaling

Continue to learn: commit to lifelong learning. Read books, take courses, and seek new experiences that contribute to your personal growth

Build a support system:

Find mentors: seek out mentors or role models who embody qualities you admire. Learn from their experiences and guidance

Surround yourself with positivity: build a network of supportive friends and family who encourage and inspire you

Rebranding yourself is a long and tedious journey, but with a little help from some science-based principles it can be as beneficial as ever!

As always,

Love Luna <3

DREAM GIRL HOBBIES PART ONE: PHYSICAL

A list for people who are looking for physical-related hobbies! Remember to choose any hobbies that align with your goals and values.

PHYSICAL 

♡ Running/jogging

♡ Yoga or stretching

♡ Pilates

♡ Sports 

♡ Soccer ♡ Basketball ♡ Tennis ♡ Lacrosse ♡ European handball ♡ Football ♡ Volleyball

♡ Cycling

♡ Swimming

♡ Gymnastics

♡ Horse-riding

♡ Archery 

♡ Weightlifting

♡ Dancing

♡ Ballet ♡ Ballroom ♡ Latin dance (salsa, cha cha cha, samba) ♡ Jazz ♡ Contemporary ♡ Zumba ♡ Hiking

♡ Rock-climbing

♡ Marital arts (Judo, karate, taekwondo)

♡ Surfing

creavity & intellectual goals here!

ten habits to adopt for a beautiful life 💭

+ curated shopping: rather than over-consume in fast fashion and trends, buy fewer, high-quality items. frequent vintage shops, boutiques, or markets where you can find unique, timeless pieces.

+ focus on wellness and exercise: consider activities that are beneficial for the body and calming for the mind, such as yoga, pilates, or long walks in nature. choose activities that allow you to connect with your surroundings and maintain balance.

+ mindful eating: prioritise healthy, whole foods and cooking meals from scratch. organic produce, artisanal products, and perhaps even locally sourced ingredients could be staples in your kitchen. eating is a mindful practice, enjoyed at a leisurely pace.

+ cultural engagement: regularly visit museums, art galleries, and theatres, or participate in cultural events that inspire and enrich their creative spirit. value learning and exposure to the arts as a way to keep life vibrant and intellectually stimulating.

+ reading and continuous learning: develop a well-curated collection of books, including classic literature, philosophy, and art, and dedicate time regularly to reading and reflecting on what you've learned.

+ minimalist technology approach: stay up-to-date with necessary technology, but maintain a minimalist approach to its use. limit screen time, avoid social media distractions, and instead prioritise face-to-face interactions or hands-on activities.

+ intentional socialising: carefully cultivate your social life, with a focus on deep, meaningful connections rather than frequent, casual interactions. you likely enjoy hosting intimate gatherings at home, where you can experience conversation, ambiance, and connection.

I be cute for one day and then book ugly for weeks 🥴😭. Does anyone have a plan or routine to be consistently put together / cute every single day. It takes so much energy but I know it’s possible lol

Social skills are a MUST and as a High Value Woman it’s important to know how to adapt to your surroundings. It can be awkward when you’re occupying grander spaces, or engaging with high value people for the first time. But I promise, it’s not and shouldn’t be a daunting experience. This PowerPoint presentation 😂 is to help you build better connections and to encourage you to make the most of your time and interactions. As we integrate back in to society, let’s continue to go for GOLD ✨

This is your Wake Up Call

Enough. This is your LIFE. Do you understand? Think 70 years left. Thats it. It's ridiculously short and yet here you are, stagnant, scrolling on your phone, mindlessly consuming useless junk. Get up. Wash your face and change your clothes. Go for a walk, or to the gym, or do some yoga (I don't care what just move your body, you need the goddamn exercise) and when you get back, make yourself some food with protein and fibre. Play some music and make your bed. I freaking guarantee you will feel better afterwards. Aren't you tired of living in the confines of mediocrity? This is your sign to pull yourself out of a rut and start fresh, even if it's 4pm in the afternoon. OK?

xoxo

LEVEL UP!---------

09/05 its my bday!! turning 17 !!! YES !