Ex Partner - Tumblr Posts

Instagram stalking my ex to make sure I think about how much I don't like them respectfully

A certain soon redeemed villain character is going to come back, i wonder who it is 🤔

Thank you.

Thank you for reminding me how chaos feels.

Because otherwise, I may not have taken a leap with someone "boring"--someone who is consistent, reliable, and honest.

Thank you for showing me that "boring" is exactly what I need.

At a certain point, I realized I couldn't try to make us work anymore. I realized I couldn't, and even more, I realized I didn't want to be the only one fighting for us any longer.

I realized I want so much more than to keep myself stuck feeling how I've felt my whole life--lonely.

So I let you go.

Not You

He's gentle.

He's kind.

He doesn't leave me behind.

And best of all

He's always on my side.

Cried about him today again.

All the things he said, did he mean them?

Does he still mean them?

Can I ever stop wondering if he just lied to me the whole time or if he actually meant it?

What the fuck?

I want to talk with him.

I miss him.

I wanted us to last.

I wanted to actually try and maybe even succeed.

I wanted to be with him.

I wanted to not be the only one who fell.

I'm still lost in the way his arms made me feel safe.

I wish he would hold me like that again and not let go this time.

Remembering doesn't bring comfort, it only brings confusion.

I actually didn't think about him today.

Which is funny and good I think.

But now that I do think about him again, I still miss him.

But it hurts less.

And I am less angry too.

I was once a star.

He made me burn.

Now I wanna burn down his house <3

Not actually.

I want to keep on burning.

I try to fill the void he left with anything that could kill me.

I'll die before letting myself fall in love again.

It's funny how love changes things.

His shirt was my favorite item, now it's just a shirt, not even a pretty one.

I am not repulsed by it, but I don't feel the need to wear it like it's an eternal hug.

I miss him.

But not because I still love him, but because I could trust him. Because he made me feel safe.

He is the first and only person I ever told everything to.

And today when I had flashbacks and a panic attack, all I wanted was him to hold me.

Because to me he means safety and trust.

Still.

Even if he is not here anymore.

I am always the second choice.

Always.

For ever everyone else will be chosen before me. Everyone else is better.

Why can't someone choose me?

Why doesn't anyone love me?

Someone please love me like I love them.

Please?

Someone I love tells me a story,

It reminds me of you,

Suddenly I am calling you good when you say you are bad.

Suddenly I am still in love with you.

And when I come back,

I am happy like it is now,

I see your name and smile,

My scars itch,

But I am getting better.

I am starting to heal.

On topic of that ask by normanon aka me, your boyfriend also really is a toxic person to others except you

How should you know? My ex boyfriend (you obviously don't keep up) was kind to me and taught me a lot, I appreciate meeting him and he isn't toxic, he is actually still pretty cool.

But yeah, whatever???