Short Writing - Tumblr Posts

Poem: Plants

// An acrostic poem

Perhaps you’ve tried to read my thoughts,

Left no psychological trick untried,

And maybe you’ve noticed that I’ve built

New barriers to hide behind.

Try to read my heart instead, and then maybe you’ll

See that it takes more than some silly tricks

         to get to know someone like me.

j.p

Eleutheromania

An intense and irresistible desire for freedom.

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I want to escape...

I no longer want to feel trapped, stuck with these invisible chains that bind me to this city.

I want to escape to the forest and be as free as the wind that blows the leaves on those beautiful oak trees.

I want to listen to the birds as they sing there songs.

I want to listen to the untouched crystal water as it flows in the rivers under the stary night sky while the moon bathes the earth in its glimmering white light.

I want to listen to the wolves as they howl into the night sky.

I want to escape and to be free. I want to escape the population and noises of the city.

I want to bask in the feelings of being free without these chains to hold me back anymore, I need to escape before this city kills me.

I need to escape my past and finally be free, to be myself, to enjoy the life that I have before I'm drifting in the void for eternity.

I need to escape to enjoy the limited time we have in life.

Maybe... Hopefully one day I can.

Hopefully one day I can enjoy my freedom, hopefully it's soon...

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I wrote this a longggg time ago. It's meant to be based on a words meaning. I have a few more I may post in a few days.

Nyctophilia

Love of darkness or night; finding relaxation or comfort in the darkness.

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Darkness brings a sense of comfort and safety to me, weird I know. How could someone find safety in something that so many fear.

It could be the way it looks, the way it goes forever at night, the never-ending darkness that holds so many secrets

Or the way the stars above shine so britly at night while they watch over us, oh the secrets they must hold.

Or the way that it sounds, so quiet that you could hear a pin drop or hear the whispers on the other ends of the earth.

Or maybe it's the light that shines in the darkness of the nights, so bright and so brilliant.

Or maybe it's the way it smells after the relaxing summer rains, that fresh clean smell that could relax the most restless of souls

Oh, the darkness... With your never-ending comfort and safety, how I wish I could bask in you forever.

Maybe it's neither of those things that make me find comfort in the nights. At least it's not for me.

I love the loneliness of the darkness, the sence of being able to do whatever you want without anyone ever knowing, the feeling of being able to put aside your everyday worries and stress, being able to let loose and be free for a few hours...

Oh, how i love the night and the darkness it brings with me. I would stay with you forever if I could, but unfortunately, the sun must rise for another day.

We shall meet again soon my friend and you can set me free once more.

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This one may need a TW. I'm not too sure. It speculates about death and afterlife type stuff, read at your own risk.

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Dormiveglia

The space that stretches between sleeping and waking

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You know when you're dreaming and just before you wake, you get that feeling of content, of happiness, of freedom, of acceptance?

I believe that's the feeling of the afterlife, putting your foot over the boundaries before you're pulled back into your body.

I believe it's like a piece of string, one side being the dream land, the other being the afterlife, and the string being the plane that holds them together.

I think the feeling of content you get is from being able to see those that have passed in your lifetime.

I think happiness is from finally being able to put your past worries and stress aside, not having any problems left.

I think the freedom is from leaving the cycle of your everyday life, having nothing to do and no responsibility's, being able to go anywhere, do anything you want without the stress and responsibility of living

I think acceptance comes from realising where you are, your body accepting it, and embracing it, I think it's to help you cross the threshold of the string and step into the freedom

I think this plane is where everything is left behind. I wonder what happens if you stay on this string. Maybe that's where reincarnation comes from.

Maybe if you stay on the string, your consciousness finds a new body, and you live again.

I guess we will never know.

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Anhedonia

The loss of interest and enjoyment in all activities that you once liked; the feeling of not caring anymore.

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I do not care anymore, all the stuff I used to like, enjoy doing, it's no longer fun… it's boring and tedious and I hate it. I only continue to do them because it's what I'm used to, the familiarity of it makes me feel safe.

But I also just do not care anymore about anything. What's the point of caring when the place we live is so ruined? Between wars and rich people up in their towering buildings this planet is being destroyed and no one with enough power seems to care enough to change it, so what is the point in caring?

You can not force someone to care, no matter how many times you show them that their actions have consequences, that what they do is slowly killing everyone.

But they do not care, they just care about the money, the power, the status of it all, but that is also a part of human evolution, being greedy is how we got here in the first place. amassing huge amounts of food to survive, but now instead of food its money.

Is there even any reason to hope when the people who can change the world for good are all too ignorant to and only do it for the worse? Is there any reason to care anymore?

What's the point of bringing life into a doomed world anyway? Who would want to raise a child in this place? It should not be a necessity to pay to live, being able to live your life should be free, it should be joyace and fun, you only have so much time to live, so much time to make an impact, to be remembered and not forgotten, fading into obscurity.

Is it even possible to change all of this? To break the status quo and save what we can of this planet, or is it too late? Have the dominos already started to fall and we are all just too ignorant to see them falling till they have already squashed us?

I hope that when- if things change that future generations do not look back at us in disgust,hate us for what we did to this planet and forced them to fix it, i hope things change… things need to change and it needs to happen fast or we will just be a blip in the timeline of the universe.

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Psychomachy

A conflict between the body and soul

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My body yearns for another, to have them close to me, to feel them in my arms and hold them close to me like a dragon does his hored. My body needs someone to rely on, to stop me from hurting myself, to hold my hands and tell me that everything will be ok.

But my soul is scared, it does not want to be hurt again. It no longer wants to share itself with others only to be damaged and broken. It no longer wants pieces ripped off of it and kept by people who do not deserve it.

My soul so badly wants another, to merge together, to be one with another soul, but it has only been hurt so far.

My soul hides itself, through emotions that make the body unlovable, to drive off people from hurting it once again. But it does not want to, it wants to open up, to feel another, just like the body.

My body resents my soul, hates it for what it makes the body do, it can not overlook the damage and hurt that the soul feels, it only sees what it is missing out on. It refuses to see the soul's point of view.

Maybe my body and soul don't need anyone else… Maybe they can learn to love each other. And then maybe, just maybe, they can both love another body, another soul, to be together just like they both so desperately want- so desperately need.

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feelings are a very strong motivator for writing.

Prompt given by Anon, thank you<3

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“Imagine, if you will, a demon and an angel (or some other opposite character archetype) meeting. Is it romantic? Do they hate each other? Who knows?”

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A demon and an angel, enemies by fate, forever to hate and try to destroy each other. But what happens when they meet up? When sworn enemies meet each other in the mortal realm, well here is what could happen: a continental battle, a battle that shows the power of both heaven and hell, a battle of flames and brimstone and light and good.

Their swords collide, one coated with dark red flames the other with bright yellow-white light, sparks fly as they scrape against each other. The demon, Arnon’s, horns curled around his head dark red in colour, his wings wrapped around his body, much smaller compared to the angel Tabris’ heavenly wingspan, bright white, almost blinding in their holy light.

Arnon scowls at the angle pushing harder on his sword hoping to overpower the angel “such a pitiful creature, you really think you can defeat me, a guardian of hell? How stupid can you holy freaks be, does your pride as ‘gods chosen’ really make you that dumb?”

Tabris pushes back, defending herself from the demon's flaming blade, the fire scorching her hands slightly “that's rich coming from the hell spawn, you are nothing but a blight on this earth and I have been sent to cleanse it. Now yield before innocent lives and wasted in this little tiff”

Arnon yells, spittle flying from his mouth as he pushes harder, his sword gliding down the angel’s blade and hitting the guard. Tabris effortly defects the sword and steps gracefully back from the demon. She wipes her face, disgust obvious on her features.

Her resolve hardens as she charges forward with her sword pointed towards the demon, it pierces his skin and the sword's holy light grows brighter burning the demon from the inside, he screams in pain as the sword is removed; crimson blood flows from the wound slowly.

“Bad idea little girl.” the demon spits out, the flames of his sword burning hotter as he moves faster then the angle can perceive, he moves behind her and slashes at her side casing a deep wound but it is quickly cauterised by the heat of the flames, he slashes at the angles leg but it isn't as deep as the first. The angle offers no other clear indication of pain other than a quiet gasp.

Tabris quickly takes off to the sky, her wings flapping behind her and leaving a dust cloud in their wake. She floats in the sky. Her body glowing a bright white light, her voice echoes over the battlefield “that is enough beast! This has gone on long enough”

The glow around her body glows brighter turning to gold as it expands, a static starts to fill the air as the light grows in size, Arnon’s eyes widen as he starts to run from Tabris but he isn't fast enough. The static reaches its peak and with it a loud ringing sound.

The light suddenly shrinks being confined within the angel's body, the world falls silent for a few seconds, the birds stop chirping and the clouds stop moving; the light explodes from the angel's body bathing the battlefield in a golden hue and scorching the ground.

As the light reaches the demon his body is turned to ashes instantly, all that is left are his horns and the flaming sword that quickly dies now that there is no more power being channelled into it.

The ground on the blast radius is left scorched beyond repair, nothing will ever grow there again, a testament to the angels power. Tabris walks toward the ash pile, picking up the sword and the horns. She takes off again back to heaven leaving the scars of battle to be discovered by the humans.

Every 25 March, when all the lavish celebrations are over, King Elessar sits down to dinner alone in a quiet chamber. He looks across the table and wishes a delicious meal to four empty chairs that look as if they were made for children.

Three of these chairs are occupied once or twice, but one always remains empty. And it will remain empty until the end of this world, when King Elessar finally sits down at the table with all four guests

Lucifer x Gn!Reader: Hand Kiss

Lucifer’s humming along to the music playing a short distance away as he sets his glass of demonus down on the table. He turns to you and begins to walk closer. With a small smile playing on his lips he reaches a palm down toward you. Following his suit, you place down your own brevage and reach for his hand. Once your hands connect he bows down low, pressing a small kiss to your palm. Head still bowed, his eyes rise to meet yours,“I believe I owe you a proper dance,” is all he says.

Owes us a dance cause he threatened us last time and basically crushed our hand~

Trying to get out of a writing block by writing as much as I can in 5 minutes but still failing. Prompts welcomed

When he awoke voices echoed all around him. The sun was shining brightly above him, no…

A light hung over head, every other inch of his surroundings was cloaked in pitch black. Nothing but the single, glass? Rose layed in his grip. The grit and dirt of the ground lingered on his skin, but no where else. lime green and similar shades of clear glass held his body in the endless void he traveled through.

His clothes felt lighter, not that they dissipated just that the fabric had change, devolved and re-adjust to fit that of a newly bloomed rose.

Or it should have, instead it looked like what every high school frat boy wish they adorned. Same jacket, green with an even white line from around the collar down to the sleeves, sweat pants that where similar. And a red shirt underneath.

His face was what had changed the most, a read and green gas mask in the shape of a snarling monster mouth, spike like thorns around the edges. Battle paint, adjacent to that of a fan at a rugby match lacing his eyes. Finally his hair a fiery red and white.

Tw: swearing, talk of abandonment.

Neil’s transformation:

Being an adult sucked, it wasn’t like high school where your parents waited on you hand and foot or college were you can have everything paid for you.

“I actually have to go out and work?!” Neil whined down the phone line.

“I know it must be sooooo difficult for you” the voice mocked.

“Riley! No sarcasm this is actually horrible!” He shook his head aggressively, narrowly dodging a lamppost. He grimaced as people shot him looks “me and my mates we’re going out tonight but I’m broke and apparently that means I’m out the group!” There was silence from the other line, Neil grew nervous.

“Maybe….maybe it’s for the best…”

“What do you mean ‘for the best’!” He did air quotes “my friends just ditch the bro code and you just want me to move on!?” He spat, throwing his phone on the floor with the sound of splintering glass. “Oh for fuck sake!”

Rain poured in buckets, Neil scrambled around in the dark, the mud of the woodland floor coating him. “C’mon! C’mon we’re the hell is it!” Turns out your parents aren’t entitled to buy you a new phone every time you break the old one “C’mon!” His hand felt it, for a brief moment. His fingers brushed against the cracked glass again, gripping it tightly he kissed the dirty thing. “Ple! Pfft! Mud!” He wiped his mouth only dragging more muck across his face. Something pricked his fingers, a rose, blood dripped down it’s dimly lit stem.

Suddenly light flooded him.

Black.

There was no clear time to be told. No exact date, exact time, exact moment that would be able to tell people. It was this...

Poison.

This slow killing poison that settles in the gaps of your jonts, the spaces in your muscles. It flows with your blood, following the set trail set by the veins. Until it reaches your brain.

If you asked, you would not be given a clear answer as to when everything cleared up and the thought came.

It was something that was planted long before the time came. It slowly blossomed, the poison as its water that tarnishes the soil it growing on.

It seeps into your being, poisonous, inky black blob of venom that crawled into the crevices of your body, your orfices and settled into you. Blending in with the crowd in your system until it leaked into your soul, painted your heart, manipulated your mind.

It was the blueish, the purplish, the disgusting array of colors that appeared on your skin as the bruised formed from another hit from an unloving and unlovable and disgusting and cruel and demonic hand. It was the bright and angry red that shaped itself as a hand that cupped the entirety of one half of your face.

It was the leakage of dark red blood that tasted like iron and smelled like it from your nose or your split lip or a cut from a bottle shard. Or the torn walls from where it slipped outside and slipped back once more.

This poison.

It takes several forms. It could be that droplet of blood that fell on your desk with a "plink". It could be the next person you talk to. The next hand that slots itself in your hand and it feels so so so wrong. It could be that stripe of saliva somewhere on your skin. It could be that look of a parent so unlike a parent's.

It could be the glinting of a silver blade that blinds you and cuts you with it's sharpness, and that blood that drips from your hand to the matress. And another. And another. And another. And another. And another. And another. And another.

Until.

Until it forms that big wet puddle of red. Like wet paint leaking across the surface of the canvas and spreading. Or blood on a tissue that spreads and leaks onto the bottom.

It could be that void in your chest as you stare at the opened and lifeless eyes of an abuser. Eyes that opened a minute before the final breath was taken. Fear etched onto them. That same fear you saw in your reflection. That same fear you saw reflected into those cruel, cruel orbs.

It could be the steps you took as you walked out.

Or it could be the tiny splash of water from when you dropped the bloody knife.

Or it could be that feeling in your chest you can't identify as you watch the crime, your crime, your sin, reported in the news and printed in the papers and talked around.

Or it could be that sickeningly sweet feeling you felt as you moved forward. Or the faint regret as you looked back.

Or that happy, giddy feeling as you left and started new.

Or that ghostly, cool touch of a hand that explores your every part with a burning, seering, hot pain.

Or that feeling of fear and relief when you woke up and your heartbeat's loud beating of thump, thump, thump, thump, thump, thump, thump, thumo, thump...

||Guilt...|| wrote by me

Plot:Short fic in how Geto would react about your death and he can't help but feel guilty for it.

About:hurt,no comfort,angst,death.

Cw:reader is dead,heart wrenching,crying.

Geto’s anger turned to guilt, which quickly turned to despair. He was too late. He couldn’t even keep his promise and see you through this. His face became wet with tears as his eyes widened, the reality slowly setting in. You.. you were gone forever in a cruel world that was unfair and unforgiving. He fell back into his bed, letting out a loud and long wail of agony.

Tears poured down his cheeks, he tried to catch his breath only to realize it was impossible. He covered his face with his hands, hoping that it was just a nightmare. But no matter how hard he blinked, or rubbed his eyes, you were still gone. All that was left of you was that sweet, soft smile that you always had. He tried to call your name, but it wouldn’t come out. All he could do was cry and scream and… just… cry.

The tears flowed like a broken dam, his sobs breaking the silence of the empty room. It felt so wrong to be in your room without you in it, to see you nowhere. How was this possible? You couldn’t be gone… you couldn’t leave him by himself in this cruel place. But no matter how many tears he cried, how many screams he let out, you didn’t return.

The days slowly passed, and his eyes became less red. It was as if the tears had been drained from his body. He tried not to move, not even to eat or drink anymore. The only thing keeping him from a state of complete apathy was the memories he held of you, and the guilt of not being there when you needed him the most. He would never forgive himself for not fulfilling his promise. He had failed you, and he couldn’t accept any other fact.

Geto would often visit your grave,it was the only way he could stay close to you. He would talk to you as if you were right beside him, as if he could still talk to you the way he used to. The cold wind would brush past him as he would sit in front of your tombstone, just staring at your name until it was etched into his memory. He made it a habit to visit you every week, as if you were still alive.

His eyes were a permanent shade of dull gray, his face constantly expressionless. The only emotion he felt was sadness and regret. The guilt never left him, he felt like a failure. Because he was one. You had trusted him to be there when you needed him, and in the end he couldn’t even do that. When you needed him most, he let you down. When you were vulnerable, he wasn’t there. His feelings were slowly being chipped away by the immense guilt, and he felt so alone.

He still remembered your face. The sweet and soft smile that was always on your lips. He remembered your gentle voice, and the way you had so calmly accepted your own death. Your eyes were a beautiful color. The way you had made him happy, and how he had taken your presence for granted… He couldn’t make the time to be there when you needed him, because of his foolish pride and he lost you. It was his fault.

His mind became more and more twisted by day. The guilt ate him up inside, as he would cry alone every night, wishing you were there to hold him. No one else could comfort him the way you could. You were the one who made all his worries go away. But now, all he had was this… this deep, agonizing emptiness. If he had been there when you were undergoing treatment, maybe you would still be there. You wouldn’t be gone.

"I'm sorry..I'm so so sorry-y-y y/n" Geto repeated over and over as he would hugged the pillow as it if were you.

He would hug your pillow tightly, as if you were there with him. He didn’t say anything, crying quietly into it, wishing, just for a moment, that your voice would fill the room. That the warmth of your embrace would be felt once again. That he would wake up from this nightmare. That this was all a mistake. That he should have been there when you were crying for help. That he should have done more…

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I'm planning to do a part 2 hopefully it will be less sad

I'm too cold to be alive.

-katie, 19:00

If you can dance

With my pen

As gently

As you do

In my imagination

Be my muse

Stain my notes

For eternity

(if it's not asking too much)

-be my muse, katie, 27th of February 2020

Good Old-fashioned Loverboy

three teens who figured it out. . .sorta. . .yeah definitely figured it out

words: 1412

yamaguchi x reader x tsukishima

No exams, no homework and no practice which was honestly a miracle for the team. Just a regular Friday night for the Karasuno boys and their managers. The 3rd years are planning to go to the cinema, the 2nd years are working together to find an arcade that Tanaka and Noya haven’t been banned from, and two groups of 1st years are doing something different. Yachi, Hinata, and Kageyama were heading to the park for two things; taking photos and volleyball. While Yamaguchi, Tsukishima, and you were heading to town for karaoke.

“This would’ve been much easier if we had picked a place beforehand.” you groaned out to the boys on either side of them. The trio just got off the train and realized none of them had direction to the Karaoke Plaza.

“I can proudly say that it’s not on me this time. Tsukki was in charge of directions for this one. . .” Yamaguchi mumbled out not wanting to take the blame for the lack of directions.

“Shut up, Yamaguchi.” Tsukishima grumbled out, ears lightly tinted pink. It sorta drifted from his mind during the train ride especially with you and Yamaguchi leaning against him, debating on what songs to sing when they got there.

Y/N could only laugh at Tsukishima’s unfortunate call out by Yamaguchi. To save Tsukishima from further embarrassment, they just searched “Karaoke Plaza” and found one about a 10 minute walk from the train station.

After looping around twice around the block, they finally get to the plaza and Y/N payed for the room while Yamaguchi gathered snacks, drinks for them and Tsukishima paid for those because he messed up on the directions.

“A good Karaoke Friday with my boys!” you exclaimed excitedly, walking into the room holding the basket of treats that Tsukishima had you carry.

“Tch. . . it’s not that exciting, nerd” the tall blonde muttered out

“Tsukki, you’re in class 1-4 with us so you’re also a ‘nerd’ along with us” the green headed boy shot back as if it was second nature.

You set down the basket on the middle table near the book and controls while the two others got comfortable and fixed. Once getting their bags and jackets off, Yamaguchi looked for the small tambourines and Tsukishima decided to get the TV going.

Looking through the book, Y/N found the song they were looking for, ‘Good Old-Fashioned Loverboy’ by Queen, it’s been a song on constant repeat for the manager especially when down in the dumps about their crushes. Punching in the American song code into the controller it starts at the song’s second chorus.

Say the word, your wish is my command~

You’ve known these two boys for four years now and it’s been quite the ride for you. You met them during junior high orientation week and you’re happy you did meet this pair. Complete opposites to one another but fit together as if they were final puzzle pieces.

Tsukishima Kei was a tough person to get talking to at first but slowly his tough facade chipped away. The tall blonde boy who is often seen with a frown or a condescending smirk on his face was smiling in the present of someone other than his closest friend.

Yamaguchi Tadashi was shy at first meet and isn’t the biggest people person but had no problem when snickering at others along with tsukishima. For some reason he had no troubles talking to you, he was the first to greet and the first to exchange numbers.

Two generally closed off kids meet another and open up. Sure they had their rough moments but that’s what made them them. You made it easier though and so you became the last actual piece of puzzle that formed the trio.

Two years in, you realized that you started to develop feelings that weren’t just platonic towards the boys. It was confusing and a nightmare figuring it out. You always tried to shove it deep down but it got hard after sometime.

Even more when you notice Tsukishima taking a liking towards Yamaguchi and seeing Yamaguchi giving the same. But you never notice how they looked at you when you looked away. Three friends who didn’t know what to do or say.

C’mon and Get It~

You didn’t know what came over yourself when you noticed Tsukishima glancing at Yamaguchi with a look of affection in his eye.

“Maybe it‘s time to let go” You thought with a sigh before pushing Yams towards Tsukki

Ooh, love~

Yamaguchi was too into his thoughts to hear the sudden sigh from beside him before being pushed towards his best friend, Tsukishima Kei.

His eyes widened from the fast change. Cheeks growing warm from the sudden burst of his personal bubble and the closeness. Looking at each other, it was as if the childhood friends were thinking on the same line.

“Maybe it’s time we finally tell them”

This wasn’t going to be some impulsive decision on their half or at least that’s what they’re telling themselves. Though it’s not like the two didn’t talk about this before with each other. The boys figured out at the end of junior high that they not only like each other but you as well.

So lost in the song you didn’t see the look the friends gave one another. A look that was soft but hesitant yet full of hope and affection.

Feeling a sudden tug at your hoodie, you're pulled between the middle block and pinch server. At the same time the two sing with genuine voices.

ooh, loverboy~

What’re you doin’ tonight, hey, boy?~

Standing there frozen from the line, heat moved to your cheeks and a silly smile slowly appeared on your face.

Write my letter~

Feel much better~

And use my fancy patter on the telephone~

The music is still playing on in the background and hearts racing for the sudden silence between the trio. Tadashi and Kei took a shot in the dark doing this, not really sure if you even like them back but they didn't care. The worst that could happen is you not feeling the same towards the two.

“You know it isn’t funny to mess with me like that, you guys.” you muttered out though your voice held no malice just a tinge of confusion and caution.

“We aren’t joking, idiot.”

“Hey!”

“Just hear us out, please?”

The room didn’t hold an awkward feeling if anything it was calm but loud at the same time.

“We realized that both of us hold feeling for you, y/n” Tadashi sounded so nervous getting his sentence out, “We’re honestly taking ou–” he gets cut off by the tall blonde

“What Tadashi is trying to say is that we both like you and if you don’t feel the same that’s okay, we could just ignore what just happened and move on.” he sounded so uninterested but the speed he spoke at gave away what his tone did not. He was nervous. 

“I–” you began to speak but was cut off by Tadashi

“Like Tsukki said, if you don’t feel the same that’s okay.” 

“Not like it would be the end of the world–” Kei gets a nudge in the side, tch, “Watch it, Yamaguchi.”

“Sorry, Tsukki.”

“Can I speak now?” you asked softly and gave a smile. The two players give you a nod. You shuffle a bit before clearing your throat.

“Before I was interrupted,” you eyed Tadashi playful, “I was going to say that I like you both as well.” you kept your gaze a bit low, too nervous to look them in the eyes. Taking in a deep slow breath, you gathered enough confidence to look towards Kei, “I like how you take the time out of your day to check on me when you feel like something is wrong,” grabbing his hand before turning towards Tadashi and taking his as well before continuing

“And I like how you let me call at the terrible hour of 3 in the morning just because I couldn’t sleep or I really wanted to talk about something you had no knowledge prior to.”

“So if you need to hear it one more time, I like both of you, Tsukishima Kei and Yamaguchi Tadashi.”

One Month Later

“Hey Stingyshima, Yamaguchi, why is there a picture of the two of you and Y/N cuddling in the group chat?”

The pinch server could only laugh at his blonde partner because he was the one sent it by mistake.

“Shut up, Yamaguchi.”

“Sorry, Tsukki”

A Drop of Moonlight

"Flight is the only release from the dread of grounded reality."

When staring up at the sky and spotting a bird gliding gracefully over it the first question that comes to mind would be, “What would it feel like, up there, to be able to fly?” The answer would be extreme elation. The freedom experienced when flying is boundless. The freedom that flying offers and all else it gives remove all other feelings of burden from the mind.

I was skulking about on the road as carefully as a cat. I was afraid of being spotted in the middle of the night and the sadness and anxiety of being forcibly locked up at home were finally flying away from my heart. 

The creatures of the night had tucked themselves up in their little corners of the world and the whole street had gone still. Something had jumped down from a tree onto the footpath in front of me. 

The shadow of the tree had engulfed the creature in darkness.

I had gotten afraid thinking I had been spotted and was about to go jump into a hedge when the moonlight dropped a little bit of light upon the skulking creature.  I was staring at the form in fear and anxiousness, hoping that the creature wouldn’t force me back into my usual habit of hiding in a corner and cowering in fear. It was a black cat. 

I heaved a sigh of relief. I walked closer to the cat and crouched to its level. The cat didn’t seem to mind. I scratched its head gently and whispered, “Sorry, I thought you were someone.” 

The cat didn’t say anything (of course) but the way it walked away after a few scratches was enough to signal that there was probably no way that I would ever be forgiven. I smiled at the cat. The cat seemed to tell through its eyes that it was thankful to see me. I returned the sentiment with one final smile towards the cat and slowly glided away. 

I walked on until I reached the Forest of Wayde. I walked in slowly, knowing that if anyone spotted me there, I could be sure I would never be allowed out of the house again. 

I walked slowly for the first 100 metres to avoid being heard and then began flying over the ground. It took me a while to gain proper balance, but after I balanced myself, I was off. I was zooming all over the forest and staring in awe at all the sights below. It was marvellous, how much an eagle’s eye perspective of things could change one's perception of the world. 

I had not realised what I was actually doing until now. Up in the sky, I had just realised that I could finally do as I pleased. I was finally free from the noise of metal dragging on the floor everywhere I went. I was finally released from the cold grip of windowless walls and was surrounded by the warmth of nature, walls of trees and gorgeous portraits of the gorgeous woman of the sky.

I flew for some time until I saw the Lake of Starlight. I gently landed on the banks of the vast lake. It had looked small from up in the sky, but its true vastness and beauty could only be admired up close. 

The lake shone as though it truly were filled with starlight. The entire sky shone upon the clear mirror of water. Vibrant purple, violet and indigo hues shone upon the sky like velvet pieces. The stars in the sky shone like specks of diamond dust. The last detail to complete it all was a large full moon. The full moon filled the environment with its light and allowed it to overflow and overtake the world. The moonlight, in fact, was flowing in such excess that drops of it were lying upon the grass. 

I dipped my hands into the sparkling clear Lake of Starlight. The feeling of elation and freedom was running fresh through my veins. The feeling of freedom that one experienced when in flight was boundless. I allowed my hand to gently glide over the surface before immersing them completely. 

When I lifted my hand up, a small bead-like substance had formed and was floating on my palm. The bead was shining, almost like a pearl. It appeared solid at first glance, but if one looked closer, it could be noticed that it was flowing around itself, as though liquid. The bead seemed beautiful, almost magical. Perhaps it was, but I certainly was not interested in that. 

Ever since it had been discovered that I had the power of flight, I had been pushed into a corner of my house for that reason and was told that certain people would try to get me for my powers. I had been made to live in fear and no outdoor exposure for at least 3 years until I discovered a passage from my room to Warren Street. 

I had no clue how the passageway managed to get there, but curiosity and dread of going back got the better of me, and I used the passageway anyways. I was quite glad I had found it because only due to the passage had I found some method of keeping myself sane and calm and the beauty and wonder that was the beautiful Forest of Wayde. I had become least interested in magic since then and the only thing I ever focused on was enjoying the beauty of the forest. 

I felt something soft and fuzzy stroke against my elbow. I looked down, slightly startled, only to find the sweet black cat sitting near me, making itself comfortable. I smiled at the cat and opened my palms a little bit. 

The shiny drop flew up into the moonlight. I rubbed the head of the cat gently and the cat purred in affirmation. I stared at the moonlight, feeling satisfied with myself. Something fell from the sky onto my nose and onto the cat’s head. It looked as shiny as moonlight. 

This time, it didn’t remain in my head. It seemed to have disappeared after some time and I could feel my body absorbing some sort of power. I felt extremely powerful and I felt like I could just start flying. 

I stood up and was about to start flying, but something heavy fell onto my head. I moved my hand toward my head only to get knocked on the head again. In shock, I fainted. Everything went black. 

As though the little black cat had entirely enveloped me. 

All my bad luck.

And there was him, laughing. Lighting up the whole room as he always did. When he was near me I would always feel like my heart is finally at peace, so much like bathing in the sun on a warm mid-July afternoon as the breeze gently blows.

And then there was the smile. The smile he gave everyone on this planet, the smile that always reminds me I will never be someone who is more than this. But it was beautiful as always, brutally beautiful if I dare say. It really is.

“Hey” He greeted first.

“Hey…” Words slipped out of my mind as soon as I open my mouth. “I can see you did good job on concealing that bushy brows”. Shouldn’t have said that.

He raises his drawn thin eyebrows. “I didn’t think you’d recognize me right away. I thought I did pretty good job on this time’s theatrical make up.” I could see him blushing underneath the thick ghostly white face paint, his ears were basically on fire. I couldn’t help but basically chuckle secretly.

Of course I’d recognize you. You are always lingering inside me, you are always wandering around my mind. Even if I forget all the beautiful things that are left in the world, I would still remember your face, your eyes, your voice.

This pain, that is either longing or nostalgia will definitely never reach you.

I’m leaving tomorrow.

19. The year I finally found myself again after searching years and years, and then lost it again too soon like the clam that had been stolen it’s only pearl. ( I had it I swear.)

Vengeance seeking, forever raging, endlessly dreaming about something greater, wistful remembrances, nothing but all numb. Sitting in a darkest void of a room with full of oneself, almost too exhausting, almost exciting. I am soulless.

I swear there are no feelings left for him in me anymore. It’s just that I’m so used to all of my thoughts being filled with him so, completely erasing him feels really empty.

You deceived me, because you knew I was strong.

You injured me, because you knew I would survive.

If I was less strong, tell me, would you’ve been much nicer to me?

- k.m