Public School - Tumblr Posts
My brother is modding nerf guns. He is doing a nerf war that my high school puts together. Note- this is not officially a school organized event, it’s just closed to anyone not in the school. Anyway, he is using real tools and connecting wires and moving stuff around. He taught himself how to do these things. He is actually learning real skills that people use in real life i.e electrical engineering. He actually remembers how to do these things and he has so much fun doing it, then he gets to go out and use it to win a competition and money. He said that he once took an engineering class and it was so boring that he stopped paying attention and ended up getting a bad grade. He is being totally safe. Knows how to properly use the equipment and is doing all of this in a place he feels comfortable and safe- our home. I wish that people could see that just because you fail a class or if it’s not the field of work you want to go into that you can’t do something. I also want people to realize that these kind of things. These fun, self motivated kind of things are what drive kids to learn more. This is the kind of philosophy that needs to be brought to education. Not repeat what you’ve been told or you’ll fail.
First Day!
Today was my first day of Sophmore year of high school! It went pretty well, considering I got my schedule yesterday and I still don't have a locker. My first teacher has the distinct feeling of 'cool dad' with a slight lisp. The air conditioning was off for the whole school, so he told us if he has an asthma attack to call the office. I went to the wrong class twice before I got to my marketing class. In good news, my friend that was home schooled last year back! We sat together at lunch to catch up and I was late for my next class because of it. Still worth it!
A Fucking Rant
feel free to disagree. I just needed to scream into the void lol.
I hate inspirational videos and assemblies. No matter how good your intentions are, they make me want to crash and burn. Giving me a 7 step list on how to succeed activates every self-sabatouring, society-hating nerve in my body. Trying to inspire me without my asking awakens a special kind of frustration that dreams of quitting.
It reminds me of public school, and I mean that in the most insulting way possible.
Tell me I have to want to succeed, and see how much I don't. Sorry, but I'm a stubborn bitch. And if I say anything to anyone, I don't get taken seriously.
Tonight, I was going to do all my homework. I had to talk myself into it. And it was going to work. But now I'm crying.
Because honestly, any shitpost on Tumblr is more inspiring than an inspiring speech. Because it doesn't remind me of the system that is the source of half my mental issues. It doesn't tell me that my value lies in what I produce and how I please society. It makes me laugh. It makes me hit like and/or reblog and send a notification to the poster in return.
Despite how far I've gotten in school, I am not a "successful person ". I graduated high school with a two year degree because I did things my way and because I was loved. Any time I succeeded was when I didn't want to follow any personal plan, I just talked myself into doing it. I know what my mental blocks are. There tough to overcome, but I can do it. The thing is I HAVE TO DO IT, because nobody else really knows how to handle them, or how fragile my motivation is.
Actually paying attention to tonight's motivational speech was a mistake. Perhaps next time I'll draw while pretending to take notes, hoping to tune it out. Maybe I'll pretend to need the restroom. I don't know.
Don't tell me to want success. I don't, and I probably never will. I want to survive. I want a better world for my and other future kids. Success is a means to an end, and I refuse to pretend that's not the case. Ideally, I would be valued for my soul and my love I have for others. I don't want to hate myself for not fitting in with the ideal of success. Success is a construct and it's bullshit.
So yeah. Fuck your inspiring speech. Fuck your books and famous people quotes and 7-how-tf-many step plans and growth mindset bull. I am growing. You cannot stop me because I am a stubborn bitch. Every day I become more loving of myself and others. I control my destiny. I am stronger than my fucked up mental health, and I will win on my terms. I know I can't be alone when I say this: speaker, I'm happy you're successful and grateful that you want to help. But for the love of everything sane, please stop.
I actually have somewhat of a story behind mine
As a former gifted kid, I was always told I HAD to succeed. The line between encouragement and pressure was thin. And for a long time, I agreed. I wanted to "go for the gold".
I started questioning this in middle school. After experiencing bullying, crappy teachers and staff vs teachers who were actual saints with shit for support (between lack of funding bc public school and my middle school was a contest of who could suck up to the principal), disruptive classmates (they were annoying, I'll admit that, especially since I really cared about learning, but in hindsight I should've been more understanding), being unessesarily overwhelmed with hw, and just having my eyes opened to the world. I started to really question my education. I fell in love with The Hunger Games and Ray Bradbury in particular, and my parents got me into Star Trek. I got my first smart phone at 13, and got my first real introduction to social media. The older I became, the less I really wanted the gold. I vowed to be glitter instead: flashier, messier, imperfect, brighter, and impossible to get rid of. Glitter became a symbol of my soul and how I was changing and growing and starting to fight against the unfairness around me. I was far from perfect, but it was my mission to stand up to bullying, to call out crappy teachers and supporting ones who actually cared, all with the support of my loving, Karen mom. To be honest, I had a lot of academic elitism and racism that I wasn't even aware of at the time, but my path to redemption and rebellion started when I decided that I wasn't going to take things at face value. My achievements were great, but why couldn't everyone have the same opportunities? And why did all this pressure and extra hw fall onto the smart kids such as myself?
As a way to stand out from the crowd and to outwardly display my discontent for the status quo, I wore the most bizarre outfits I could come up with, many of wich included glitter.
Glitter was also the reason I started questioning my sexuality. Anytime I saw a girl wearing glitter or even just a really cool outfit I felt The Sexual Attraction ™️. Being dense, I litterally thought I was sexuality attracted to glitter lmao.
My feelings of frustration multiplied in high school, as did my love of glitter. Twards the end of high school, I started experiencing my first academic burnout. I had so many feelings of anger, not only to the school system, but myself. The idea that I could be imperfect yet beautiful like glitter helped me through that and encouraged me to push through that. I sought help for my mental health problems, despite my mom's protests. At 18, after the death of my cat (God bless her soul. I miss my baby girl every day), my mom conceded and I finnally got therapy. I finnally felt like I was going uphill.
Then covid happened. That threw a wrench in my mental health. I started off my 4 year college depressed and not even passing. My anger at my family, my schooling, my society, and myself turned into a crushing negativity.
One of the few things that kept me sane enough to survive was glitter. I own several outfits covered in sequins and glitter. Fashion is an art and I was my own audience. If I could sparkle, I had confidence, and hope.
Im still recovering from that low. My grades are still crappy. But my heart has grown so much. I learned so many things I never could have learned in school.
I am a better person than I was in middle school, if a bit more pessimistic. I'm aware of my biases. I'm aware of my impact. I've learned to forgive my shortcomings. I see myself growing into a pile of glitter, and one day, I hope my positive influence spreads far and wide, like that bit of shimmer in the corner of the carpet that no vacuum cleaner can reach. You don't always know where it came from, but you smile when you see it.
I may not always "go for the gold". Many times, gold is simply unattainable.
If I can be a pile of glitter instead, that is more than enough.
i'm curious, if u want rb this with why you chose your url!
A Fucking Rant
feel free to disagree. I just needed to scream into the void lol.
I hate inspirational videos and assemblies. No matter how good your intentions are, they make me want to crash and burn. Giving me a 7 step list on how to succeed activates every self-sabatouring, society-hating nerve in my body. Trying to inspire me without my asking awakens a special kind of frustration that dreams of quitting.
It reminds me of public school, and I mean that in the most insulting way possible.
Tell me I have to want to succeed, and see how much I don't. Sorry, but I'm a stubborn bitch. And if I say anything to anyone, I don't get taken seriously.
Tonight, I was going to do all my homework. I had to talk myself into it. And it was going to work. But now I'm crying.
Because honestly, any shitpost on Tumblr is more inspiring than an inspiring speech. Because it doesn't remind me of the system that is the source of half my mental issues. It doesn't tell me that my value lies in what I produce and how I please society. It makes me laugh. It makes me hit like and/or reblog and send a notification to the poster in return.
Despite how far I've gotten in school, I am not a "successful person ". I graduated high school with a two year degree because I did things my way and because I was loved. Any time I succeeded was when I didn't want to follow any personal plan, I just talked myself into doing it. I know what my mental blocks are. There tough to overcome, but I can do it. The thing is I HAVE TO DO IT, because nobody else really knows how to handle them, or how fragile my motivation is.
Actually paying attention to tonight's motivational speech was a mistake. Perhaps next time I'll draw while pretending to take notes, hoping to tune it out. Maybe I'll pretend to need the restroom. I don't know.
Don't tell me to want success. I don't, and I probably never will. I want to survive. I want a better world for my and other future kids. Success is a means to an end, and I refuse to pretend that's not the case. Ideally, I would be valued for my soul and my love I have for others. I don't want to hate myself for not fitting in with the ideal of success. Success is a construct and it's bullshit.
So yeah. Fuck your inspiring speech. Fuck your books and famous people quotes and 7-how-tf-many step plans and growth mindset bull. I am growing. You cannot stop me because I am a stubborn bitch. Every day I become more loving of myself and others. I control my destiny. I am stronger than my fucked up mental health, and I will win on my terms. I know I can't be alone when I say this: speaker, I'm happy you're successful and grateful that you want to help. But for the love of everything sane, please stop.
I actually have somewhat of a story behind mine
As a former gifted kid, I was always told I HAD to succeed. The line between encouragement and pressure was thin. And for a long time, I agreed. I wanted to "go for the gold".
I started questioning this in middle school. After experiencing bullying, crappy teachers and staff vs teachers who were actual saints with shit for support (between lack of funding bc public school and my middle school was a contest of who could suck up to the principal), disruptive classmates (they were annoying, I'll admit that, especially since I really cared about learning, but in hindsight I should've been more understanding), being unessesarily overwhelmed with hw, and just having my eyes opened to the world. I started to really question my education. I fell in love with The Hunger Games and Ray Bradbury in particular, and my parents got me into Star Trek. I got my first smart phone at 13, and got my first real introduction to social media. The older I became, the less I really wanted the gold. I vowed to be glitter instead: flashier, messier, imperfect, brighter, and impossible to get rid of. Glitter became a symbol of my soul and how I was changing and growing and starting to fight against the unfairness around me. I was far from perfect, but it was my mission to stand up to bullying, to call out crappy teachers and supporting ones who actually cared, all with the support of my loving, Karen mom. To be honest, I had a lot of academic elitism and racism that I wasn't even aware of at the time, but my path to redemption and rebellion started when I decided that I wasn't going to take things at face value. My achievements were great, but why couldn't everyone have the same opportunities? And why did all this pressure and extra hw fall onto the smart kids such as myself?
As a way to stand out from the crowd and to outwardly display my discontent for the status quo, I wore the most bizarre outfits I could come up with, many of wich included glitter.
Glitter was also the reason I started questioning my sexuality. Anytime I saw a girl wearing glitter or even just a really cool outfit I felt The Sexual Attraction ™️. Being dense, I litterally thought I was sexuality attracted to glitter lmao.
My feelings of frustration multiplied in high school, as did my love of glitter. Twards the end of high school, I started experiencing my first academic burnout. I had so many feelings of anger, not only to the school system, but myself. The idea that I could be imperfect yet beautiful like glitter helped me through that and encouraged me to push through that. I sought help for my mental health problems, despite my mom's protests. At 18, after the death of my cat (God bless her soul. I miss my baby girl every day), my mom conceded and I finnally got therapy. I finnally felt like I was going uphill.
Then covid happened. That threw a wrench in my mental health. I started off my 4 year college depressed and not even passing. My anger at my family, my schooling, my society, and myself turned into a crushing negativity.
One of the few things that kept me sane enough to survive was glitter. I own several outfits covered in sequins and glitter. Fashion is an art and I was my own audience. If I could sparkle, I had confidence, and hope.
Im still recovering from that low. My grades are still crappy. But my heart has grown so much. I learned so many things I never could have learned in school.
I am a better person than I was in middle school, if a bit more pessimistic. I'm aware of my biases. I'm aware of my impact. I've learned to forgive my shortcomings. I see myself growing into a pile of glitter, and one day, I hope my positive influence spreads far and wide, like that bit of shimmer in the corner of the carpet that no vacuum cleaner can reach. You don't always know where it came from, but you smile when you see it.
I may not always "go for the gold". Many times, gold is simply unattainable.
If I can be a pile of glitter instead, that is more than enough.
i'm curious, if u want rb this with why you chose your url!
Tell me why I’m math grade literally went down to a 23 the day before interm grades were finalized 😭
I hate school air sm
Like, logically I know that Bruce went to a preppy, private school. But like, what if Alfred wanted him to be normal (obv backfired) and sent him to public school.
Imagine showing up to public school in a limo. He would have been absolutely roasted.
Anyone else feel threatened by middle schoolers? Just me? Okay.
OS by morganscherer007 featuring cotton shirts
Public School short sleeve shirt / J Crew off the shoulder top, $120 / Wildfox hoody, $86 / Baseball tee / WithChic cotton shirt, $13 / Phase Eight tapered pants, $51 / Legging pants / Denim legging / Harem pants, $26 / Skater skirt / Pour La Victoire black sandals / Adidas sports shoes, $99 / Keds sneaker / Vans skate shoes / MIA thong sandals / Hair styling tool
OS by morganscherer007 featuring kohl shoes
Public School shirt top / Victoria s Secret victoria secret t shirt / 7 For All Mankind skinny fit jeans, $250 / NIKE high rise pants, $64 / Converse kohl shoes / NIKE kohl shoes, $98
OS by morganscherer007 featuring lace up shoes
Public School drape top / J Crew j crew shirt, $85 / Wildfox hooded pullover, $67 / White button up shirt / WithChic t shirt, $13 / Phase Eight tapered trousers, $49 / Legging pants / High rise legging / Harem trousers, $25 / Stretch skirt / Pour La Victoire high heel stiletto / Adidas rubber sole shoes, $93 / Keds gray sneaker / Vans lace up shoes / MIA black slip on shoes / Hair styling tool
Edward Midford X MC X Charles Grey - Love Triangle
I made this mini comic? and I liked enough to put a musicbox in the background. It really set the mood, lol.
Music Box: Elfen Lied - Lilium
Me and my bff @super-weird-blog are summoning georgie in theater cause shoe sensei is gone
public school will really have students with a cast still on their leg, bring in a doctors note after 2 weeks to excuse them from P.E.
Going from an American Public High School™ to a private-ish school is so fun. Every time I talk ab my old school I either get horrified looks or "Oh yea! Someone lit their homework on fire at my school too!"
Untitled #146 by leowashington934 featuring black booties
Public School merino wool sweater, $520 / Geox coat / New Look button-fly jeans, $25 / Yves Saint Laurent black booties / Linda Farrow sunglasses, $630
"He was such a great mathematician that he calculated the area of hell and found out that there is enough space for all of you."
-One of my teachers
That moment when you realize that you and your friends not using the bathroom unless it was an absolute emergency in middle school and high school because sometimes people are weird about the stupid cracks between the door and stall and floor and ceiling in public bathrooms isn't a universal experience and other countries don't have these stupid gaps and people feel completely (or at least more) safe using public bathrooms