Self Mutalition - Tumblr Posts
⚠️tw sh
First smoke then cut
When you had cut yesterday evening and next day in the morning you had volleyball match.....
Very clever move ngl
Again....too tired to cut
I am done. My mum, while we were coming back from the stable, decided to talk with me about my cuts and sh so she parked the car somewhere and said "Tell me honestly, do you still cut yourself ? You know that your cutting is so hard for me to handle."
I said that I stopped cutting (what is a lie)
She "You've changed, I can see it and I think you still cut yourself."
"No, I don't."
"Can you please give me your every blade and razor?"
"Sure"
"You won't hide any?"
"No" (ofc I did)
"It's so hard for me to handle your cutting."
I don't think I've changed but okay....I will give her my blades but I've already hid few. But my mood ? Totally dropped....I don't know anymore....
⚠️Tw/sh talk ⚠️
I want to cut so bad but also I don't want to move
I don't want to undress to find perfect place
I don't have energy to look for razors
I don't have energy to wait for cuts to stop bleeding
I don't have energy to hide those cuts
I don't have energy to cut
I just don't
⚠️tw sh
I had a dream where I hit beans !
But like my leg was almost torn open in two
So it was more than beans
And I found nurse who agreed to stitch it and I btw met my classmates...and a handsome doctor
But I don't know how this ended because I was in short coma and then I woke up
Wish my cuts would heal faster so I could do it more often I’ve been going over or between old ones
Tw gore undercut
why is destroying my body so fun?
I use sexual relationships as self harm because,
if I just give my body away it won't be mine anymore. I won't have to deal with it anymore.
Is it bad that I really love how my sh looks? It's so pretty, fresh and with scabs.
This is how I can verbally explain my trauma.
movies that are triggering to pass time
link containing movie collections:
My fellow annas,
Math is your friend!!! For example, knowing a lb of fat is 3500 cals means that if you "overate" by 500 cals, but you were already in a 1000 cal deficit, you'll just lose weight more slowly and won't gain weight.
Multiplication and division are nice too because, if you have a 400 cal desert but eat it over the course of 4 days, it's only 100 cals a day AND you enjoy it 4 times.
Also if you eat *gasp* 1000-1200 cals a day (ik sooo many) you will lose weight, just not instantly, and it's possible to do this for a really long time without organ failure/hair loss/mood swings/any other bad symptoms you don't want. Even the smallest deficit will add up over time and it'll be easier to transition into maintenance once you reach your gw.
If you do binge, still log the cals. You might find that while your weight went up 3lb, you only went 1000 cals over your bmr, meaning that you gained like 6 OUNCES of fat and the rest is water and bloat.
Also think about time as numbers. Yeah 8 weeks to lose 8kg feels like 4 ever, buttttt it's better than multiple years of binge/strve cycle and no progress (cough cough, ME)
Hope this helps, it breaks my heart to see posts like "I ate 1000 cals today, all my progress is gone 😭" because you deserve to know exactly what your weight is doing and why (also I swear I'm not trying to be preachy about this, I spent my entire teenage years like you all and I'm trying not to also spend my twenties like this too lol)
Stay safe 🩷🤍🩷🤍🩷🤍🩷🤍🩷🤍
If you go back to eating normal, you’ll have a normal body again
TW: s/h (no pictures) block don't report!!!
I just got so angry and overwhelmed at everything and took it out on my thighs and now I feel better so Idk why everyone in my life says it's not effective?😭
My sister took me to a breakfast place and I don't like to waste food and it didn't have calories on the menu and I never pvrge before my sisters apartment and my parents apartment always have thin walls. But I'm making myself feel better by saying 'it's throwing off my metabolism this way i can still have a fast metabolism'. :(, I feel sick and fat. My stomach hurts.
Tw: sh [no pics]
Guys I did something new and cvtt3d the side of my shoulder(I only cvt on my thighs) but now I gotta be really careful when I'm not wearing a Hoodie and only a t-shirt also now I have to wear t-shirts to swim but luckily it's cold where I live so hopefully the curse of my bl4de being dull will come in handy if the scars fade quickly.
But I like it on shoulders more and idk just do but I have to go back to my thighs or else I'm likely to get caught if I continue on my shoulders.
WARNING : $H
Ignore how shallow this is its my first time trying to go low 👀💀
Why do baby beans bleed soooooooo much like stop 😭