Realization - Tumblr Posts

The simultaneous "yes"

I didn't participate in a lot of events at my gifted school, mostly because they involved being "social," or "leaving" my room. I remember the dances were the most fun to stay back in the dorms for, because everyone was gone and that meant WAY better internet.

There was, however, one event I always loved to participate in: the Gold Rush, known one year as the Gem Hunt. It was organized annually (or occasionally semi-annually) by a student life advisor named Jim. He was an outdoors-y kind of person, and this was his attempt at getting us students unfused from our keyboards and into the sunshine.

He went out and hid colored rocks around the campus for the students to find. These could be traded for fancy prizes like snacks and stuff. There were a few bigger rocks that were worth a lot more, but they were much more deviously hidden; I remember one up in the nook of a tree, hidden by the leaves. But the best prize was the giant rock, which was always the central focus of the hunt - whoever found it would be granted anything - within reason, of course, which usually meant either worth ~$15, or some sort of service like "a private fire in the back for me and my significant other." In sum, it was kind of like a high-stakes Easter egg hunt.

Our campus was located on top of a college campus, and there were four major routes: two paths from each dorm to the school building, a path between the two dorms, and a path out by the lake. Each time the hunt was on, I went up and down those about ten times each looking for the rocks. Of course, I was always most interested in the big rock, because I could feasibly get a game with it.

The year of the gem hunt (the last one before I went to college), I had made my routes up and down the dorm paths, but hadn't gone out to the lake yet, so I invited one of my closest friends, Eric, to come with me. We agreed that if we found it, we'd split the prize.

The lake path is the longest by far - about half a mile. It's popular with the college students as an exercise path, both for the length and the scenic route. We started at one end and combed the whole path, finding bunches of little rocks that most others had missed. We even found some in pieces of trash, like old chip bags. But there were no large rocks, and the number of small rocks seemed to be fewer towards the end of the path. Moreover, we didn't find the largest rock.

So I convinced Eric to look with me another couple of times. All we found was more trash. I was certain it was somewhere near the lake, as I had already scoured the other paths without success. Finally, after maybe the fifth pass (without finding any more rocks), I conceded and we went back. To give an idea of the time, we started at 3PM and didn't go back until 6.

After eating dinner (and convincing ourselves someone else found it), we went to talk to Jim. I turned in my haul for some snacks and casually mentioned the large rock.

"Yeah, no one found it this time," he said. "I'm pretty proud of where I hid it." "Really?" Eric chimed in. "Can you tell us?" "It's late enough that no one's going to find it, so I suppose... Do you guys remember seeing a crushed styrofoam cup?"

What followed could have come straight out of a movie. Eric and I both turned to each other with shocked realization, then turned back and, with perfect timing, deadpanned:

"Yes."

Because out of all the litter lining the lake, there was only one small styrofoam cup, located near the beginning of the path at the lake's edge. And we had both ruled it out, because the large rock definitely couldn't fit. How could that possibly have worked out?

"There's a small gold rock in there," he explained. "I tied some fishing line to it. On the other end is a plastic bag with the big rock in it. I dropped that into the lake itself. So when someone found the small rock, they would find the large rock."

We all got a good laugh out of it. Although I was mostly laughing at the mind-reading Eric and I did. Secretly, I was screaming at Jim.

Why do I still love the people who hurt me the most

Imagine falling for someone unexpectedly and someone you didn't expect and being confused and being left with that feeling and there is nothing you can do but just deal with it painfully and cry because you're so confused. That's when it's time to fall in love with God and let God bring someone appropriate into your life. Or have nobody..just God. Emotions and the heart are..TERRIBLE. The heart lies emotions suck, they do. So it's time to just give it all to God, everything. The best way you can. Give it all to God because God loves us more than ANY human ever will. Humans are unforgiving and harsh.

Jewels of Truth Statements & Favorite Quotes of the Month

Hello All, As now that the holiday season is entering full swing at least here in the States. With the American Thanksgiving holiday only 2 weeks away and the shoppers black Friday at retailers upcoming. Most families in the modern day society are being caught up with keeping households afloat economically speaking. The reasons are various and very few of them are avoidable lest things become worse rather than better from negligence. So those of us in materialistic societies be it in the West or the burgeoning East should value people more than personal property. It's very easy for our human ego to mistake people as things by mistreating them. A slippery slope I hope no one is encountering right now. For people much like technology is making our lives further productive be that for better or for worse. Do not misplace your grace during these forthcoming holidays no matter your faith persuasion in the world. Today's trio of spiritual wisdom statements in the series are on the topics of: Truth, Oneness, and Realization. #1057-1059 Enjoy them as always and may you find them practical as they are meant to enlighten, if not challenge us. (*I'm also going to be on a family visit to my hometown in Miami, FL. Enjoying the Thanksgiving holiday and beyond for a couple of weeks. So I won't be able to update this blog site during that time. ) -------------------------------------------------------- Truth: 1057) With truth comes responsibility. A responsibility that is not to be taken lightly nor belittled in its scope of the encounter at hand. Truth is meant to be described, to heal entirely, and to set free what it shall convey in its subject matter in question. A half truth is a half lie and misleading by the intention of the speaker or the witness that repeats it to others. A truth is both subjective and objective in its natural outlook of what it shall entail. Responsibility comes on the heels of how the truth is handled and with whom it shall or should be shared with others. Withholding the truth can be an injustice depending on the reasons and justifications used. By keeping it hidden from those who need it or deserve to be with it in spirit. Suffering can only come from a truth that is mishandled by the subjective intent to manipulate others to your own unjust ends. Be careful not to become an accomplice to such an undoing of ill treatment of others. Over time it shall either numb your scruples or weigh so heavily on your heart you will need much healing to overcome in spirit. Move with the truth followed by your convictions in tandem use by what you behold as sacred in life. Be it as a philosophical or spiritual difference it is all one and the same beauty of the mind. As you live in truth you shall be blessed by your reputation as a person of renowned character. Nothing short of grace can be more endearing to any man, woman, or child in life as a principle. Amen.                                      ---Ivan Pozo-Illas / Atrayo. Oneness: 1058) We are all one within the true "Spirit of God" within our hearts, minds, bodies, and in the care of all the souls in manifest and ethereal Creation. If we dare to separate ourselves from this ultimate truth in a secular fashion. We stand to lose out from being wholeheartedly connected to the glory of God(dess) in our lives. We cheat ourselves and for a time become miserable not becoming aware of the wonders all around us. A divinity that awaits this acceptance of such a sublime benediction releases us from this world. Be still and listen to your heart beating with the pulse of Life. That gives power to the stars and the heavens to shine so brightly. Do not just look to the sky for God, but indeed look within each others hearts and there you shall find your salvation. In this truth is the glory of God most assured in a united divinity that is both real and alive right now! Amen.                                                                                        ---Ivan Pozo-Illas / Atrayo. Realization: 1059) For a true realization to occur in one's mind it must also be felt in your heart. A realization can't have one without the other from being involved as a matter of consequence. For an intellectual realization alone is only a partial connection. It must have its companion within the emotional in order to seize a full realization. Especially when it comes to a culmination of a splendid epiphany. To realize an idea, concept, or a truth one must see it within the mind's eye. In order to feel it in your heart afterwards and be able to mold it with a justified reason. Although a medley of realizations strung together like a chain can at times become confusing to the intellect and the emotional being. This is where patience must be sought after in earnest in order to meditate or contemplate upon the subject matter. All other thoughts become secondary until a revelation is shown by your sincere intent to learn and grow as a person without prejudice. A realization can be refreshing akin to an "Aha!" moment in its fullest delight. Or bury you further into more questions leading you elsewhere in thought. Enjoy your musings and be filled with wonder for each breakthrough affords you another encounter of self discovery.                                                       ---Ivan Pozo-Illas / Atrayo. ---------------------------------------------------- In the time of your life, live so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but shall smile to the Infinite delight and mystery of it.                                                          ---William Saroyan. "The Time of Your Life" Although we have been made to believe that if we let go we will end up with nothing, life reveals just the opposite; that letting go is the real path to freedom. ---Sogyal Rinpoche.  "Glimpse After Glimpse" Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.                                                                      ---Carl Gustav Jung. It is a powerful practice to be generous when you are the one feeling in need.                                                        ---Allan Lokos. "Through the Flames" To live content with small means; to seek elegance rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion... In a word, to let the spiritual, unhidden and unconscious, grow up through the common. This is to be my symphony. ---William Henry Channing.

confused af about Fundy's existence (from Wilbur n Sally.. ??)

okay so. one line has actually gotten the thoughts working

so actually i dont know if thats part canon but for an odd reason ive seen that in multiple fics and stuff that happens a lot thats similar as fuck is usually canon?

so.. i just (this is so cursed, im sorry if this wasnt actually canon sobs)

having gone through body science stuff in school a bit ago i now realize that this makes zero sense, because if he were to reproduce asexually, then logically, whoever is reproduced out of that would be an exact copy of wilbur since thered only be one set of genes

BUT he fucked a salmon (or did a salmon fuck him? im so confused sobs) BUT REPRODUCES ASEXUALLY?? which doesnt make sense because reproducing asexually means only one parent but if you were to reproduce sexually thered be like reproductive organs for that purpose... i dont know man there are cursed stuff where wilbur got pregnant with fundy?? I DONT KNOW WHY IT HAS TO BE PHRASEd SO WEIRDLY-- i dont know man but i hear the toe on the most

i cant believe this is the part of the dream smp lore that is stumping me the most

..besides philza canonically fucking a smart fridge … ??????

ALSO ALSO can we talk about how wilbur either fucked or was fucked by a salmon, their child had been reproduced asexually (again, dont know if thats canon but it might as well be sobs.)

AND THEN CAME OUT A FUCKIN FURRY FOX HYBRID ?? but there was a salmon and a human/siren/avian-hybrid, whatever people imagine wilbur as a hybrid of as the parents?

no but guys what

can anyone give me an explanation that genuinely makes sense

i mean a lot of people imagine sally a salmon-hybrid but i think that wilbur has stated somewhere that it is indeed a fish and not a hybrid or something? I DONT KNOW ANYMORE my memory cannot be trusted.

theres like so many scenes in so many different fics where tommy says that wilbur fucked a salmon and wilbur corrected him saying that she was a salmon-hybrid and i just

IT CONFUSES ME SO BADLY D:

i dont think theres a logical reason to this

i think its just better not to question the logistics of how the fuck that happened..?????

aAAAAAAAAaaaaa

..wait no actually snapes like aizawa??? cause i mean aizawa assumed midoriya was being lazy and arrogant because of his powerful quirk (not knowing that he was a late bloomer and only got it not too long ago) and snape assumed harry was arrogant and riding on his fame or whatever even though harry had zero clue about the wizarding world until not long ago and both have been in bad traumatizing situations not that anyone knows of that or really does much about it ???

sobs in i kinda hate snape but how can i love dadzawa when hes kind of the same]

conclusion: fuck s1 aizawa. everything else is fine. and still kinda dont really like snape

You know, one of the reasons reading the Septimus Heap series was important for me was because, for whatever reason, I had never before really realized that authors really could be alive. Like, obviously I knew they could in theory, but for some reason, I just assumed all the books I read had dead authors. They weren't, by the way. At the very least, I read plenty of Junie B Jones books while Barbara Park was alive.

So I'm just going along, reading all the Septimus Heap books when- oh! shock! I discovered the series wasn't complete yet! Fyre was yet to come out and Angie Sage was still working on it. Simply put, she wasn't dead and I had just learned of this fact.

It may not be a particularly fancy milestone, and it isn't the only reason that series is important to me (I also like it, first of all; Flyte was my favorite book for like five years), but I think it's interesting that I know all this stuff. It definitely made the importance I've placed on those books last longer, I think.

Anyway, it's not particularly amazing, but that's the experience I wanted to share.

Just realized that the arm Geto lost during his final fight was the one who tried to protect Gojo in Shibuya

*BURSTS THROUGH DOOR

SLIPS AND SLIDES BECAUSE I FORGOT GRIPPY SOCKS

CRASHES THROUGH THE WALL*

YO

I JUST FIGURED OUT WHY I'M SO UNEXPECTEDLY ATTRACTED TO VALENTINO

CAUSE HE'S A MOTH

BUT HE LOOKS LIKE A BUTTERFLY

AND NOT ONLY FOR I GET FREAKED OUT BY SHIT THAT ACTS LIKE OTHER SHIT

I'M SCARED OF BUTTERFLIES AS A MIX OF THAT AND THEM BEING PLAIN CREEPY

AND AROUSAL CAN BE A FEAR RESPONSE AND IDK IF I CAN EVER LOOK A BUTTERFLY NORMAL AGAIN

There are countries that have banned Mockingjay for fear their people will finally rise up against them and start their own revolutions. There are people in Thailand that have been arrested for doing the three fingered salute.

If you still think these books about people standing up to their governments are just fads for teenagers you are blind and mistaken.

Having childhood trauma is being surprised when someone accepts your "no" as no, and doesn't push until you change your answer

❄Isolation

🐾Isolation is a confirmation, Of some people's desperation To find someone. But my isolation, Is a confirmation, That I am miles away From everyone,🐥 Away from those who try to harm. Away from those who curse and scorn. My laughter those who try to cease, Are miles away indeed.🐨 But isolation means as well, I am away , From those who loved, Those who shared. My smile those who cared.🐼 And alas! In solitude, We realize🐏 The love of those Who really cared. ❄Why didn't we notice When their love was in multitude? 🐇And now I sing my ceaseless song to you About what could have happened, What I would loose. And most of all what I would realize In my solitude. ❄You,isolation, were never my song. For in this world I'll live and die. Amidst all people I'll laugh and cry. People both rude and nice. Made of both sugar and spice. Each one both right and both wrong.⛄

" When it comes to love, we raise our fists in outrage when our friends are scorned or sobbing. We’re ready to go to battle for everyone who we adore because the scars we carry from fighting in our friend’s honor are easier to wear than the ones we acquire from fighting for ourselves. They’re badges of pride that scream to the world, “I love my friends,” while silently screaming out for yourself to be heard. " -Thought Catalog

College came, I lost track of what I believed was important. I continued to lose touch with who I truly am, trying to find the answer to the question of "Who am I?" Clearly, I did not reflect on myself quite right. I shouldn't have asked myself that question, when the answer was right in front of me. WHO I WAS THEN is WHO I AM. It was a mistake, focusing on my journey to finding myself when all those years, I am already being ME. I realized I hated myself for the wrong reasons.

I realize that lately, I am afraid of doing the things I used to do. I have become a person who is easily intimidated. I became afraid of speaking my mind, in fear that someone will deem my words unnecessary. I have stopped myself from letting my pen bleed, criticizing myself every time I start scribbling notes on my notepad. At first, I thought I was just tired, but I realized, I never got tired of writing. I just grew afraid of it. Looking back at the words I scribbled behind my journal saying, "I write and so I breathe," I realized that I have become doubtful of myself. And now I will stay true to myself. I am starting by admitting that I am surrounded by the people who does nothing but drag me down by their unwillingness to listen. People who make me feel small by acting upon their superiority complex. I knew my ideas were great, but why have I became silent? And now, I came to a point of another realization, I cannot hold on to people who intimidate me into hating my own craft. I cannot be with people who manages to pull a big stunt of making a fool out of me. I can no longer be silent.

I have been thinking the same way after leaving for college. Every time I go back to my hometown, I feel as though I am a stranger— a visitor of my own home. I hate feeling this way. My absence feels like a thick wall that continues to thicken the farther I go.

I left my father, my mother, and the town castle behind. They have gotten used to my being away, and so have I. The sheep will get used to my not being there, too.

The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho

my wish was granted.

Last night before i went to sleep, i remember i wished i will get sick and eventually die. I dont remember why i had that kind of thought… but i know i was thinking of it. Imagining how things would be like if i get a serious illness and maybe die because of it. I was curious of my family and friends’ reactions about my condition. Will they treat me differently? Will they shower me with love and care? Will i even get their attention? Those are just some of the questions i had in mind. Somehow it is not just one of my daily dramas but from my own curiousity and prolly active imagination. However, i didn’t expect that that night my wish will be granted… Yeah, i was diagnosed with a serious illness… It has something to do with my respiratory system… my breathing… how my lungs works. I remember visiting a hospital and a woman approached me to inform me that i need to be hospitalized that instant because my case is already in the serious stage. But i didn’t get scared. I dont know if i just didnt understand what she was talking about or maybe i was too schocked and in denial that time. I walked around the hospital. I saw several patients walking in front of me. I saw some dying… while their families are crying. I saw some patients laughing… they are the little kids playing, running around but they were wearing hospital gowns. Im not sure but i think i’ve been walking the whole time. I’ve visited some rooms too. I think i even got scared when a soul of a dying patient (a kid) tried communicating with me. I was scared. Really scared. I am not sure if i died… But i saw some familiar faces with me… And then… I woke up. Frightened as if everything that happened was real. I pulled my blanket to cover my face. I was scared that i might see the little kid. Then i offered a little prayer… I asked God to forgive me, to let all the souls of the people who died find their way to the Heaven, to thank Him that it was just a dream & to tell Him i dont want it to happen again. Then i went back to sleep. That morning i was glad it was all just a dream. ~~~~~ Moral Lesson of this story: Think before you ask a wish. Don’t blurt out random stuff especially when you are being emotional. Also, love life. Be thankful that we are healthy and blessed instead of asking something like dying when there are many people out there suffering from an illness, problem, hindrances in life without having their chance to prove themselves and their worth. Dont act stupid. Always be thankful to God for giving you another chance to live everyday with your loved ones. It doesn’t matter if you got a lot of problems; those are just his challenges for you to grow up, to learn, & to be stronger. God will not put us in danger; He’s always there to remind us to not let these hardships stop us from living. There is always a solution to a problem. There is hope. Don’t give up on living. Life is important. We should live our lives to the fullest!

What?!

Sometimes i don't really know what i want. I would usually just go with the flow... Or follow whatever the people around me tell me to do. But sometimes i wonder what my life would be like if i decide on my own. What kind of person i would be like if i am in control of my life. How different the treatment i will get from the people around me... I must be crazy thinking things like this... I believe i need to sit down and have a serious talk with someone. Maybe i do need it so i'll be enlightened and get courage to face reality. Coz yknow what?? I am in the point of my life where running from reality is a bad idea. It just makes me weak and useless. Oh my! I definitely need to know what i really want now. And to focus on myself, work diligently towards my future and hopefully get that prize in the end of my journey... These challenges in the path i chose to travel in are killing me little by little but i hafta endure it. I have to! I can do this! FIGHTING!!!