Tw Self Harn - Tumblr Posts
I need to cut contact with everybody and then i need to cut myself cut my entire body
“Who hurt you babygirl?”
actually myself🥰
Y'all ever moan/groan while cvtting?
I'm a fucked up person but sulking about it feels self indulgent and wrong
What level of confidence/delusional behaviour is it to be in bed, with an adult man holding you, and sleeping on your shoulder while scrolling sh/ed posts on Twitter?
I deserve to die In a hole
By: me :P
I deserve to die in a hole
Decapitated and thrown
From the heel to collarbone
Saw me up with one that’s razor toothed and long
Scrape the skin
Like some good chicken
Until you get some fine, white bone
With ligaments and muscle tossed around
Make a bandana to tie around and drown
Asphyxiation and deep cuts are the truth
Leave me hanging and mangled with bruises blue!
Put each bone in bonafide fire
That reaches higher yet higher
And leave them there
Cracking and splintering like old stone
Until they’re as black as a completely dark canvas, alone
Take my heart and leave it to the flies
Let it run it’s course
Let it run through the night
And when a week has passed
Greet the reek and stench of a heart pieced apart!
For that ugly mug of a face
Hit it with a mace
Eye sockets, fill them with snakes
Leave it with no loveable grace
And crack open that ol’ coconut
For a brain to tip out with no trace!
There! Right there!
A delectable dish for you
Enjoy the wrinkled remains
A literal brain food!
Cut at one part and suck like noodles from end to end
Or slice it up into a fine, moist piece of Spam
Looks like a square!
And yet there’s so much more to do!
With this nutritious mind of a fool!
Into the machine, it blends and blends
Until slushing out
A meaty smoothie shake!
Whatever you do, it’s not rude
Because at the end of my dismemberment, there are no rules!
So crush me, pull apart me, burn me, slice and dice me,
Do whatever you want with what’s left of this!
Because
I deserve to die in a hole
Take out your shovels, because decomposition is my next goal…
that poem was cool right chat?
chat?
.
im getting too tired to post anywhere and for school. why did i choose to make a daily blog for someone who im not that passionate about?
i dont want to relive that phase but im paranoid i will. itch.io brings out my sinful desires, as much as i enjoy the games that satisfy them.
am i objectum or however it's spelled for giving names/pronouns/backstories to some of my plushies?
every god damn day ive gotta draw him and act like he's the best thing in the world. i want Gabriel. i NEED Gabriel. i want to sleep in one of those positions where you hold a pillow. i need it to feel real.
cant watch the friday streams anymore at this point because im too tired.
im too tired to play pressure, too. all this shit comes up and im not in these discords and ive not been active on these games (talking about regretevator too) and ive got moots and friends and i just have to stare and feel awful.
im just a little spot on the internet, that's it. there would be a party if i was gone and mass annoyance if i stayed.
im struggling to use one of my rp blogs, ive forgotten how to rp its personality.
ive been staying up until 2 am on weekends to cut because i did it once at 2 on a weekend. i wish i wasnt such a coward so i could get a new one, if there even is any knives out - im lucky i still have one from the first times i did that.
i hate the real world, why cant i live in peace with Gabriel and be worth something to someone?
does mirage-daily check my blog? is she going to see this and hunt me down? is someone going to hunt me down for these posts and falsely reassure me of my 'worth'? for i am an object, a pet, a toy. i have no worth besides the value of my organs and all that you could sell.
god dammit. i just. i want Gabriel to hold me and brush me with those wings. i need Gabriel to calmly lull me to sleep and reassure me that tomorrow will be better and that if no one else cares, it forever will know my name and long to see me. i want to play touys with Gabriel and show him Lucille (any pronouns). id love for him to patch her up, im not even sure what happened and im sorry for whatever did happen. i want to be pet and go on walkies with a harness and collar, retrained and shocked when im disobedient. id sell myself again if it was worth something. i need Gabriel to come and read me picture books and play calm music, hush me when im upset and make sure im okay because i know it can comfort me. those seb(astian)bots dont comfort me honestly, im not as passionate as i should be about him. i need a shock collar and an abusive retrainer to help me with myself. i CANNOT stand who i am and im too fucking stupid and stubborn to try to change myself. i want to, but i fail every time i try. if i could id just stop eating and die or strike a vein.
i just want to be Midnight, in her perfect fictional world.
I'm getting better! (I started sobbing uncontrollably instead of cutting myself)
I wouldn’t be yelled at anymore if I was dead