Compassion - Tumblr Posts

source: instagram - @ rainbowsalt

Bianca Sparacino

the seasons are changing and so am i.

and so am i.

19 -

Black or white. Wrong or right. Good or bad. It’s all a spectrum, but I have a really hard time seeing it that way.

Today, I’m trying to hold both of these things & give them equal weight:

1. I am an addict. I am an alcoholic. I have hurt the people I love. I have made choices that put myself, my loved ones, and society in danger. Intentionally as well as unintentionally. I’ve acted in ways, with no regard for others. I’ve made people worry and caused them anxiety. I still have more to see about the ripple effects of my actions.

I give myself a little grace because I started using and drinking at a young age (13 to be precise) But I continued this pattern through the age of 29. Probably still wouldn’t have admitted it was slowly killing me if it didn’t all blow up in my face and I had no other choice but to face reality. That’s just the truth.

Even at 13, I knew I was making a bad decision (hi DARE) but I didn’t care because I thought I was better than it (lol I was kind of a “I know better than everyone else” little b at 13).

In a way, I thought I was invincible. I’ve been so consumed by my own pain that I didn’t take the time to truly acknowledge others’. I ignored them. It’s not all me me me me me. I say this to take accountability.

2. I grew up in a turbulent household. My father was an alcoholic and those are my earliest memories. I was terrified of him & embarrassed of him. He got sober and then became a drug addict. He took me on drug runs. Our backyard was covered in crack pipes. He forgot about me, he belittled me, he degraded me. He physically abused my mother and myself. He told me I wasn’t worthy and my family kind of enabled that narrative. He’s clean now and has been for years but he is so wrapped up in his own delusional world - we have no contact. I found out recently that he suffered horrible abuse and neglect as a child. The cycle continues.

It was just my parents and I, not much extended family. One grandma - well, she swallowed a lifetime of abuse and pain. She wasn’t entirely sane, as a result. The other one? Everything was my fault in her eyes, I was just like my dad. Why am I making our lives so hard? At 3, at 7, at 16, at 21, now. Ok grandma, I get it. I wasn’t an easy child. Everyone else was pretty much on the fringe, never really saw them or knew them.

My mom wasn’t around because she was busy supporting the whole household and trying to keep it all together. I still don’t know how she did it. She’s also very stoic — actually, it’s a cultural thing. We come from a background where stoicism is revered. We. Do. Not. Talk. About. Things. We overcome and we swallow it or we whisper behind closed doors and pretend everything is fine. Patriarchy rules. You can’t change your situation, bad things happen and we endure silently.

I see things from her perspective now, she was in an impossible situation. She’s only human. These days, we are a lot more honest and compassionate with each other. She is my anchor and I would give her the sun, if I could.

But I held a lot of anger and resentment towards her for most of my childhood. Because I felt no one had my back. I had to grow up and parent myself starting at a very young age. I had to figure out the world on my own. When things with my dad finally ended and she was ready to parent me, I was like “fuck you”. I was 14 years old and thought I knew everything.

So, I attribute a lot of the issues I struggle/d with to my upbringing. To not having the resources, the support, or a caregiver who could actually provide care. What about me? I never got a sorry. I got ridiculed and gaslit for being a walking trauma response as a child. No one explained that this wasn’t okay. Actually, no one really said much of anything besides getting upset when I wasn’t docile and quiet. My self-esteem is the depth of a teaspoon (but growing stronger, each day). So what about me? Where is my fucking apology? They were adults who were supposed to know better and do better.

It’s the not dealing with these issues and hiding everything until I felt like I was going to explode — that led me to make the choices I made, turning to alcohol & drugs. Like I sprinted towards them. I knew there would be consequences sure, but I didn’t see myself being where I am today. I didn’t see myself causing hurt, anguish, pain to people around me who love me. I didn’t see myself wishing for death and becoming suicidal. Honestly, I didn’t think anyone really gave a shit about me so I was free to deal however I wanted.

I see those things now. I’m uncovering more and more each day. I start to remember so many times I’ve used and forgotten about — it makes me feel sick to my stomach. It’s hard. I’m coming to terms with these choices and their consequences. No one is obliged to forgive me & I respect their boundaries. Apologies don’t erase pain. I feel embarrassed to admit these truths, because they seem ridiculous to me now. But I have to. I want to be better.

It’s hard to not think that the decisions made were entirely wrong or entirely right. That the people involved (myself included) are all good or all bad. How can I acknowledge that my childhood was difficult and shaped me as I am today, but that my choices are entirely my own? At what point, what age, is it acceptable to say I knew better but continued to choose self-destruction? How do I forgive myself?

Maybe the issue is that I’m focused on that instead of understanding how decisions & people are far more complex than an either/or. I’m struggling to reconcile these things as truth, altogether — to understand the gray.

I still have a long way to go.

E. Russell

45 -

Warning: I got a lot to say (as usual).

I got married!! Again. Hehe, finally had our weekend we booked two years ago. It was absolutely stunning. But it was a lot. Can we normalize not wanting a big wedding or even a wedding at all? Can we normalize wedding anxiety? Can we normalize dreading big events?

Can everyone just understand that I had a difficult childhood so big intense emotions are terrifying for me and I usually use alcohol/drugs to tamp it down so I can still experience them, albeit distantly. Not excusing, just explaining.

Also - hello this shit is expensive! And we had a frugal wedding.

In the sense that, as a bride, I feel like I should be all sparkles in my eyes and over the moon and dancing on a rainbow - but really, it was my nightmare. My ADHD was in overdrive & the whole weekend felt like a blackout. Reading personal intimate vows in front of people? No thank you lol. Having all eyes on me? I’ll pass. Feeling immense pressure to have ONE perfect day? I’d rather crack.

But I did it anyway. I’m glad I did. And I did all the super emotionally intense parts, sober as a priest. Yay!

Some positives: I’m so lucky to have people who will travel just to celebrate with me. My mom made a speech…it was poetic & very sweet. She described me as “radiant, effervescent, and vivacious”. Like?????? :) I love a good vocabulary.

Umm my stepdad made a speech and he was a freaking VIBE. We haven’t always gotten along but he loves my mom fiercely & is so supportive of her. So I can’t really fault the guy, even if sometimes I’m just like *points to head* “wtf is going on up there?”. I also got some quality time with my extended family, whom I rarely see. They flew over two oceans and two continents just to be with me for this day! Like how amazing is that. :)

The whole night looked like something out of a fairytale with a bohemian theme and fairy lights. Turqoiuse waters & perfect white sand. It was dreamy and picturesque and beautiful.

On top of that, I have friends in all places - I’m not really a one group friend. So it’s a little unnerving to have everyone come together (Will they get along? Will there be drama? Will it be awkward? Will I be so focused on everyone else’s experience that I forget to enjoy my own? LOL but really)

But it was so so much better than I could have ever imagined. We all had a blast!

Speaking OF sobriety, yeah we broke that shit. I had my first alcoholic drink in almost 5 months. Now, those of the I bleed AA variety would freak out because yes, I relapsed. And omg haven’t I read the big book that says I can never ever ever have a drink again? What will Bill think? /s

But hear me out: I discussed my choice to drink with my therapist prior to actually doing it. I had a support system and a harm reduction plan in place. And, I’ve been doing a LOT of work in the last few months to identify, forgive, heal myself & limiting beliefs/negative thought patterns. Ya know, the ones that I used alcohol and drugs to cope with. I’m not anywhere close to where I’d like to be but I’m a hell of a lot farther away from who I used to be.

As my therapist put it: “It seems like this is a symbolic decision for you. Kind of like a “fuck you I am in charge of my life & I can make my own decisions and I don’t care what anyone else thinks”. She’s not wrong.

BUT BUT BUT here’s the best part! Yes I drank, however all it did was remind me of how shitty alcohol actually feels. I don’t miss the hangovers one bit. I enjoy feeling semi-stable in my emotional sense. I like feeling clear headed. Also drinking a lot makes you bloated and more susceptible to gaining extra weight. We want to be snatched always!!!!

I am going back to my life with no intention or desire to drink. No desperate wanting to escape. How freaking wild. Now what works for me may not work for anyone else - but again, sobriety & recovery are so unique to everyone. Everyone’s story starts from the same feelings, but recovery is not a one size fits all.

With all of that being said - I feel super good these days. Not in like a manic & overstimulated way, but a sort of quiet peace that comes with feeling like I am really loving myself for all that I have been, all that I am, and all that I will be.

I want to live my life & the idea of all the things I can do is exciting now. I no longer feel (constantly) like I’m drudging through the monotony of life. I know bad days will come. So will good days. Slowly but surely, I am creating new habits that take me further from my past and closer to the light of my future.

I came to the realization that who fucking cares? The world and the people in my life (though with the best of intentions) will tell me who they think I should be. Will tell me how to fit the mold. But I don’t care about fitting the mold anymore. I don’t want to apologize for having needs and existing. I have people who love all the little bits of me and have always loved them, despite my inner critic telling me I have to earn it.

I decide who I am.

I mean, there’s tons of awful fucking people in the world, who are still loved by someone. Like even Hitler had his main squeeze til the final breath. If that’s any consolation lol.

And just from a nerdy math perspective… statistically speaking, there are 8B+ people in the world. If 10 don’t like me or don’t get me, theres 10 more that do!

I trust my inner She to guide me to where I want to be and to attract the people that I need. These days I have faith.

Each day a little better and brighter.

Harnessing Your Pain: A Journey Towards Helping Others Heal Shaina Tranquilino April 21, 2024

Pain is an inevitable part of the human experience. It comes in many forms—physical, emotional, mental—and at times, it can feel overwhelming, all-consuming. Yet, amidst the darkness of our suffering lies a glimmer of hope: the potential to transform our pain into something meaningful, something that can not only heal ourselves but also help others find solace in their own struggles.

Each of us carries our own unique burdens, our own stories of heartache and despair. Whether it's the loss of a loved one, the sting of rejection, or the battle with illness, our pain has the power to connect us on a deeply human level. It is through this shared experience of suffering that we can find empathy, compassion, and ultimately, the desire to alleviate the pain of others.

But how do we begin to use our pain to help others heal? The journey is deeply personal and often challenging, yet immensely rewarding. Here are some steps to guide you along the way:

Acknowledge Your Pain: The first step towards using your pain to help others is to acknowledge it. Allow yourself to feel the full spectrum of your emotions, whether it's grief, anger, or despair. Denying or suppressing your pain will only prolong your suffering and hinder your ability to connect with others.

Seek Support: You don't have to navigate your pain alone. Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist who can offer support and guidance as you process your emotions. Surrounding yourself with a supportive community can provide comfort and validation, reminding you that you are not alone in your struggles.

Find Meaning in Your Pain: While pain itself may feel senseless, it is often through adversity that we discover our greatest strengths and passions. Reflect on your experiences and ask yourself how they have shaped you as a person. What lessons have you learned? What values have become more important to you as a result? Finding meaning in your pain can give purpose to your suffering and inspire you to make a positive impact in the lives of others.

Share Your Story: Vulnerability is a powerful tool for connection. By sharing your own experiences of pain and resilience, you create a space for others to do the same. Whether it's through writing, speaking, or creating art, sharing your story can inspire hope and healing in those who are struggling.

Empower Others: As you embark on your journey of using your pain to help others, remember that everyone's healing process is unique. Offer support and encouragement without imposing your own beliefs or expectations. Empower others to find their own path towards healing, and be a source of strength and compassion along the way.

Practice Self-Compassion: Lastly, don't forget to extend the same kindness and compassion to yourself that you offer to others. Healing is a journey, and it's okay to have setbacks along the way. Treat yourself with patience and understanding, and remember that your worth is not defined by your pain.

While pain may be an inevitable part of the human experience, it also has the power to unite us in our shared humanity. By harnessing our pain and using it to help others heal, we not only find meaning and purpose in our own suffering but also create a ripple effect of compassion and empathy that has the power to transform lives. So, embrace your pain, for within it lies the seeds of hope and healing for yourself and others.

Celebrating Mother's Day with Sensitivity and Compassion Shaina Tranquilino May 15, 2024

As Mother's Day is here, it's essential to recognize that while this day is a celebration for many, it can also be a source of pain and complexity for others. While we honour the mothers who have nurtured and loved us, we must also hold space for those who may find this day challenging due to various circumstances. This blog post is dedicated to acknowledging the diverse experiences surrounding Mother's Day, offering empathy, understanding, and support to all.

For those fortunate to have loving mothers or mother figures in their lives, Mother's Day is a time to express gratitude and appreciation. It's a day to celebrate the unconditional love, sacrifices, and guidance that mothers provide. Whether through gestures big or small, taking the time to honor and cherish the mothers in our lives is a beautiful way to show our appreciation.

However, it's essential to recognize that motherhood comes in many forms. It extends beyond biological relationships to include adoptive mothers, stepmothers, grandmothers, aunts, mentors, and other influential figures who fulfill maternal roles. Each of these individuals contributes to shaping our lives and deserves recognition on this special day.

While Mother's Day can be a joyous occasion for many, it can also evoke feelings of sadness and grief for those who have lost their mothers or mother figures. Whether due to illness, tragedy, or the passage of time, the absence of a beloved mother can leave an indelible void in one's life.

To those who are grieving the loss of a mother, please know that you are not alone. It's okay to feel a mix of emotions on this day, including sadness, nostalgia, and even anger. Allow yourself the space to honour your mother's memory in whatever way feels most meaningful to you, whether through quiet reflection, visiting a special place, or sharing stories with loved ones.

Moreover, let us also remember those who may have complicated relationships with their mothers, fraught with unresolved issues or estrangement. Mother's Day can serve as a reminder of these complexities, prompting feelings of ambivalence or pain. It's crucial to acknowledge and validate these experiences, offering support and understanding to those who may be struggling.

In celebrating Mother's Day, let us embrace the diversity of experiences surrounding motherhood. For some, motherhood may be a cherished dream yet to be realized due to infertility, miscarriage, or other challenges. To those yearning to become mothers, know that your worth is not defined by biological parenthood. Your capacity to love and nurture extends far beyond conventional notions of motherhood, and your journey is valid and deserving of recognition.

Furthermore, let us extend our compassion to individuals who may not have positive relationships with their mothers or who have chosen alternative paths in life. Mother's Day can evoke complex emotions for these individuals, and it's essential to offer support without judgment or expectation.

As we commemorate Mother's Day, let us do so with sensitivity, compassion, and inclusivity. May this day serve as a reminder to honour all forms of motherhood, to support those who are grieving or struggling, and to embrace the diverse experiences that shape our lives. Whether celebrating with joy or navigating through sorrow, may we come together in solidarity, offering kindness and understanding to all.

Healing is the New Hustling: Prioritizing Wellness in a Culture of Constant Motion Shaina Tranquilino May 17, 2024

In a world that glorifies hustle culture and champions productivity above all else, the concept of healing often takes a backseat. We're bombarded with messages urging us to grind harder, hustle faster, and strive for more. But amidst the relentless pursuit of success, we often neglect an essential aspect of our well-being: the need to heal.

Healing is not just about recovering from physical ailments; it encompasses mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being as well. It's about addressing the wounds that go beyond the surface level and nurturing ourselves back to wholeness. In a society where burnout and stress-related illnesses are rampant, prioritizing healing is more crucial than ever before.

The traditional notion of "hustling" implies pushing ourselves to the limit, often at the expense of our health and happiness. It's a mindset rooted in the belief that success requires constant motion and relentless effort. However, this mindset can lead to exhaustion, anxiety, and a sense of emptiness, ultimately undermining our long-term well-being.

But what if we shifted our focus from hustling to healing? What if, instead of glorifying busyness, we celebrated self-care and introspection? This shift in perspective is not about being lazy or complacent; it's about recognizing that true success and fulfillment stem from a place of wholeness and balance.

Healing is not a passive process; it requires conscious effort and commitment. It involves setting boundaries, practicing self-compassion, and prioritizing activities that nourish our mind, body, and soul. Whether it's through meditation, therapy, journaling, or spending time in nature, healing looks different for everyone. What matters is that we make space for it in our lives and honour its importance.

In a culture that often equates worth with productivity, embracing healing can feel countercultural. It requires us to challenge the narrative that our value is contingent upon how much we accomplish. Instead, it invites us to redefine success on our own terms—one that encompasses not just external achievements, but also inner peace and contentment.

Moreover, prioritizing healing isn't just beneficial on an individual level; it also has broader societal implications. When we take the time to heal and prioritize our well-being, we become more resilient, compassionate, and empathetic individuals. We're better equipped to show up for ourselves and others, fostering stronger relationships and communities in the process.

So, how can we integrate healing into our lives in a meaningful way? It starts by acknowledging that it's okay to slow down and prioritize self-care. It means listening to our bodies and minds, and honouring their needs without judgment or guilt. It involves creating space for rest, reflection, and rejuvenation amidst life's demands.

In essence, healing is the new hustling because it recognizes that our worth isn't determined by how much we do, but by how well we take care of ourselves and others. It's about embracing our humanity in a world that often demands superhuman feats. By prioritizing healing, we not only reclaim our well-being but also pave the way for a more compassionate and sustainable future.

The Big Sky Mind Shaina Tranquilino May 31, 2024

It's easy to feel overwhelmed by the constant stream of information, responsibilities, and distractions. Our minds, much like wild animals, can become unruly and difficult to control, leading to stress, anxiety, and a sense of being lost. However, within this chaos lies the potential for incredible clarity and peace—what some call the "Big Sky Mind."

What is the Big Sky Mind?

The concept of the Big Sky Mind draws from Buddhist teachings and mindfulness practices. It suggests that our minds are like the vast, open sky: expansive, boundless, and inherently calm. Just as the sky remains unchanged regardless of the weather patterns that pass through it, our true nature remains pure and serene despite the turbulence of our thoughts and emotions.

Understanding this concept can be transformative. It reminds us that no matter how chaotic our minds may seem, there is always a deeper, unchanging state of calm and clarity within us.

The Wild Mind

Before we can fully embrace the Big Sky Mind, we must first acknowledge the wild nature of our everyday consciousness. Our minds are constantly bombarded with thoughts, emotions, and sensory inputs, which can lead to a state of perpetual distraction and unrest. This "wild mind" is characterized by:

Restlessness: A continual feeling of needing to do something, leading to a lack of focus.

Overthinking: An endless loop of thoughts that can cause anxiety and stress.

Emotional Reactivity: Quick, intense reactions to situations, often without reflection.

Disconnection: Feeling detached from the present moment, ourselves, and others.

Taming the Wild Mind

Taming the wild mind is not about suppressing or eliminating thoughts and emotions but learning to observe and understand them without becoming entangled. Here are some practices that can help:

1. Mindfulness Meditation

Mindfulness meditation is a powerful tool for cultivating awareness and presence. By focusing on your breath, bodily sensations, or a specific object, you can train your mind to return to the present moment whenever it starts to wander. This practice helps you become more aware of your thought patterns and reduces the impact of distractions.

2. Acceptance

Accepting your thoughts and emotions as they are, without judgment, is crucial. Recognize that it's natural for the mind to wander and for emotions to fluctuate. By accepting these experiences without resistance, you create space for them to arise and pass without getting caught up in them.

3. Letting Go

Learning to let go is essential for taming the wild mind. This doesn't mean ignoring your thoughts and emotions but rather not clinging to them. Visualize your thoughts as clouds passing through the sky. They come and go, but the sky remains unchanged. Practice letting go of your need to control or analyze every thought.

4. Grounding Techniques

Grounding techniques can help anchor you in the present moment. Activities like walking in nature, practicing yoga, or simply focusing on your breath can bring your awareness back to the here and now. These practices help you connect with your body and the physical world, reducing mental clutter.

Embracing the Big Sky Mind

Once you begin to tame your wild mind, you can start to experience the vastness and tranquility of the Big Sky Mind. Here are some ways to deepen this connection:

1. Reflect on the Nature of Mind

Spend time contemplating the nature of your mind. Notice how your thoughts and emotions are transient, like weather patterns in the sky. Reflect on the expansiveness of your consciousness and the boundless nature of your being.

2. Cultivate Compassion

A key aspect of the Big Sky Mind is compassion—both for yourself and others. Recognize that everyone experiences the wildness of the mind and that this shared experience can foster empathy and connection. Practicing loving-kindness meditation can help you develop a compassionate heart.

3. Engage in Creative Expression

Creative activities like painting, writing, or playing music can help you tap into the expansive quality of the Big Sky Mind. These activities encourage you to explore and express your inner world without judgment, allowing your true nature to shine through.

4. Practice Presence

Finally, strive to live in the present moment as much as possible. Engage fully with whatever you are doing, whether it's eating, working, or spending time with loved ones. The more you practice presence, the more you will experience the serenity and clarity of the Big Sky Mind.

Taming the wild mind and embracing the Big Sky Mind is a journey that requires patience, practice, and compassion. By cultivating mindfulness, acceptance, and presence, we can begin to experience the vast, boundless nature of our true selves. Remember, just as the sky remains calm and expansive despite the storms that pass through, you too have an inner sanctuary of peace and clarity waiting to be discovered. Embrace the journey, and let the Big Sky Mind guide you to a life of greater harmony and fulfillment.

A Life of Learning Shaina Tranquilino June 1, 2024 In the grand classroom of Earth School, every day presents us with new lessons. Unlike traditional educational systems, Earth School offers an immersive curriculum that goes beyond textbooks and tests. Here, we learn not only with our minds but also with our hearts and souls. This education, though less formal, is profoundly transformative, shaping who we are and how we navigate the world.

Embracing the Journey

From the moment we are born, Earth School enrolls us in its endless journey of learning. Our first lessons come from our immediate environment. We learn to trust, to love, and to communicate, guided by the nurturing presence of our caregivers. As we grow, our interactions expand, and with them, the complexity of our lessons.

Lessons of the Heart

Compassion: One of the most fundamental lessons Earth School teaches is compassion. Through our interactions with others, we learn to feel and understand the emotions of those around us. Whether it's through the joy of a friend's success or the sorrow of a neighbor's loss, these experiences open our hearts and teach us the value of empathy.

Forgiveness: Another vital lesson is forgiveness. Holding onto anger and resentment can be a heavy burden. Through the trials and tribulations of relationships, we learn that forgiveness is not about excusing bad behavior but about freeing ourselves from the chains of negativity. This lesson often comes with time and reflection, teaching us to let go and move forward with a lighter heart.

Love: Perhaps the most powerful lesson of all is love. Love comes in many forms—romantic love, familial love, friendship, and even self-love. Each form teaches us about connection, vulnerability, and the beauty of giving and receiving love unconditionally. Love is the foundation upon which all other lessons are built, the ultimate expression of our humanity.

Lessons of the Soul

Resilience: Life is filled with challenges, and Earth School provides countless opportunities to develop resilience. Through personal losses, failures, and hardships, we learn to adapt, to pick ourselves up, and to keep going. Resilience is a testament to the strength of the human spirit and a crucial lesson for navigating the ups and downs of life.

Purpose: Finding one's purpose is a profound journey of the soul. Earth School encourages us to explore our passions, our talents, and our dreams. This exploration often requires introspection and the courage to pursue what truly matters to us. In discovering our purpose, we find meaning and fulfillment, guiding us towards a life that feels both intentional and rewarding.

Connection: Beyond the physical, Earth School teaches us about our connection to the greater whole. This might be through moments of awe in nature, the realization of the interconnectedness of all life, or spiritual practices that transcend the mundane. These lessons remind us that we are part of something larger, fostering a sense of belonging and peace.

The Lifelong Student

In Earth School, we are lifelong students. There are no diplomas or graduation ceremonies, only continuous growth and discovery. Every experience, every person we meet, every challenge we face, contributes to our education. This perspective encourages us to embrace life with curiosity and openness, recognizing that each moment holds the potential for learning.

Earth School's education of the heart and soul is a beautiful, intricate journey. It shapes us into compassionate, resilient, and purpose-driven beings, connected deeply with ourselves and the world around us. As we navigate through this grand school, let us remember to cherish the lessons, embrace the growth, and honor the profound wisdom we gain along the way.

Embracing Life with an Open Heart: A Journey to Greater Consciousness Shaina Tranquilino July 25, 2024

In a world that often feels rushed and disconnected, cultivating an open heart can be a transformative practice. To approach life with an open heart is to embrace a mindset that welcomes vulnerability, compassion, and a deeper connection with oneself and others. It is an invitation to greater consciousness, where the barriers of fear and judgment dissolve, making way for authentic relationships and a profound sense of inner peace.

What Does It Mean to Have an Open Heart?

Having an open heart means being willing to experience life fully, with all its joys and sorrows, without shutting down or becoming defensive. It's about:

Vulnerability: Allowing yourself to be seen as you truly are, without masks or pretenses. This means embracing your imperfections and being honest about your feelings.

Compassion: Cultivating empathy and kindness towards yourself and others. It's about understanding that everyone is fighting their own battles and showing gentleness in your interactions.

Presence: Being fully engaged in the present moment, rather than being caught up in past regrets or future anxieties. An open heart is mindful and attentive.

The Path to Greater Consciousness

When we open our hearts, we open the door to a higher state of consciousness. This journey involves several key steps:

Self-Awareness: Developing an understanding of your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. This self-awareness allows you to recognize when you are closing your heart due to fear or pain.

Acceptance: Embracing yourself and others as they are, without trying to change or control them. Acceptance is the foundation of unconditional love.

Letting Go: Releasing past hurts, grudges, and the need for control. Letting go frees you from the burdens that weigh down your heart and mind.

Gratitude: Focusing on the positive aspects of life and being thankful for the present moment. Gratitude shifts your perspective and opens your heart to the abundance around you.

Benefits of an Open Heart

Living with an open heart brings numerous benefits, both to your inner world and your external relationships:

Deeper Connections: You form more meaningful and authentic relationships when you approach others with openness and vulnerability.

Emotional Resilience: An open heart helps you navigate life's challenges with grace and strength, as you are more connected to your inner resources.

Inner Peace: Letting go of fear and judgment creates a serene inner landscape, where you can find calm even amidst chaos.

Enhanced Creativity: Openness allows you to tap into your creative potential, as you are more in tune with your intuition and inspiration.

Practical Steps to Open Your Heart

Practice Mindfulness: Spend time each day in meditation or quiet reflection to become more aware of your thoughts and feelings.

Engage in Heart-Centered Activities: Spend time doing what you love, whether it's being in nature, creating art, or spending time with loved ones.

Express Gratitude: Keep a gratitude journal and write down three things you are thankful for each day.

Be Kind to Yourself: Treat yourself with the same compassion and understanding that you would offer a dear friend.

Forgive: Let go of grudges and practice forgiveness, both towards yourself and others. This frees up emotional space for love and joy.

Opening your heart is a journey, not a destination. It requires ongoing practice and patience, but the rewards are immense. By approaching life with an open heart, you embrace a greater consciousness that enriches every aspect of your existence. You connect more deeply with yourself and others, navigate challenges with resilience, and find a profound sense of peace and fulfillment. So, take a deep breath, open your heart, and step into the fullness of life.

The Silence of the Heart: A Journey Within Shaina Tranquilino July 27, 2024

Finding a moment of true silence can feel like an impossible dream. The world is filled with constant noise—traffic, conversations, notifications—each one clamouring for our attention. Yet, within each of us, there lies a profound stillness, a place of quiet reflection and deep understanding: the silence of the heart.

Listening Beyond the Noise

To hear the silence of the heart, one must develop a sensitive ear, attuned not to the external sounds but to the subtle whispers within. This silence is not merely the absence of noise but a state of being where the mind's incessant chatter subsides, allowing the heart's true voice to emerge. It is in this sacred quietude that we can connect with our innermost thoughts, feelings, and truths.

The Path to Inner Silence

Finding this inner silence requires practice and patience. Here are a few steps to guide you on this journey:

1. Mindful Breathing

Begin with mindful breathing. Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes, and focus on your breath. Inhale deeply, hold for a moment, and exhale slowly. As you concentrate on your breathing, let go of any distracting thoughts. This practice helps to calm the mind and prepares it to listen to the heart.

2. Meditation

Meditation is a powerful tool to access the silence within. Start with short sessions, gradually increasing the duration as you become more comfortable. Focus on a mantra, a word, or even the rhythm of your breath. Allow your thoughts to come and go without attachment. Over time, you will find that the mind quiets, revealing the stillness of the heart.

3. Nature Connection

Spend time in nature. The natural world has a way of soothing the soul and quieting the mind. Whether it's a walk in the forest, sitting by a stream, or simply being in a garden, nature’s silence can help you tune into your own inner silence.

4. Journaling

Writing down your thoughts can be a form of meditation. Pouring your heart onto paper can release pent-up emotions and clear mental clutter, making space for silence. Reflect on your feelings and experiences, and allow the process to guide you to deeper insights.

Embracing the Silence

The silence of the heart is not an empty void but a rich and fertile ground where wisdom, creativity, and peace reside. It is in this silence that we can:

Discover Our True Self: Stripped of external influences and distractions, we can connect with our authentic selves. This self-awareness is the foundation of personal growth and fulfillment.

Find Clarity and Purpose: The heart’s silence brings clarity. In this space, we can discern our true desires and purpose, unclouded by the noise of daily life.

Cultivate Compassion and Empathy: Listening to our heart’s silence nurtures compassion and empathy. We become more attuned to our own needs and the needs of others, fostering deeper and more meaningful relationships.

The Transformative Power of Silence

The silence of the heart is transformative. It can heal emotional wounds, inspire creativity, and provide a sanctuary of peace in a chaotic world. By regularly tuning into this silence, we cultivate a sense of inner calm and resilience that can profoundly impact our lives.

In a world that never stops talking, the silence of the heart is a precious gift. It is a space of reflection, understanding, and profound peace that is accessible to each one of us. By nurturing this silence, we not only enrich our own lives but also contribute to a more compassionate and mindful world. So, take a moment, breathe deeply, and listen. The silence of the heart is calling, inviting you to a journey of self-discovery and inner peace.

Anger and the Power of Release Shaina Tranquilino July 28, 2024

Anger is a natural human emotion, an intense response to perceived wrongs, injustices, or frustrations. However, how we handle anger can significantly impact our well-being and relationships. Traditionally, people might think of channeling their anger into revenge or retaliation, believing it to be a way to restore balance and achieve justice. But this approach often leads to more harm than good, creating an energy of imbalance that can perpetuate a cycle of negativity. A different approach involves releasing anger, which can foster healing, personal growth, and emotional balance.

The Cycle of Revenge and Its Consequences

Revenge might seem satisfying in the heat of the moment, providing a sense of justice or retribution. However, this satisfaction is usually short-lived. Thoughts of revenge can consume our minds, fueling anger and hatred. This emotional turbulence creates an energy of imbalance within us, affecting our mental and physical health. Prolonged anger and resentment can lead to stress, anxiety, and even depression. Moreover, acting on revenge often perpetuates a cycle of negativity, leading to further conflicts and emotional turmoil.

The Power of Releasing Anger

Releasing anger doesn't mean suppressing it or pretending it doesn't exist. It's about acknowledging the emotion, understanding its root cause, and finding healthy ways to let it go. This approach promotes emotional balance and allows us to move forward without being weighed down by negative feelings. Here are some strategies for releasing anger effectively:

1. Acknowledge Your Anger

The first step in releasing anger is to acknowledge it. Denying or suppressing anger can intensify the emotion over time. Recognize that it's okay to feel angry and that this emotion is a natural response to certain situations. Give yourself permission to feel without judgment.

2. Understand the Root Cause

Take a moment to reflect on why you're angry. Is it a specific action, event, or person that triggered your anger? Understanding the root cause can help you address the underlying issue rather than just the surface emotion. This insight can also prevent future occurrences of similar anger triggers.

3. Express Your Feelings

Find a healthy outlet to express your anger. This could be talking to a trusted friend or therapist, writing in a journal, or engaging in physical activity. The goal is to release the pent-up energy in a way that doesn't harm yourself or others.

4. Practice Mindfulness and Meditation

Mindfulness and meditation can be powerful tools for managing anger. These practices help you stay present, observe your emotions without judgment, and develop a sense of inner calm. Regular mindfulness practice can reduce the intensity of anger and improve your overall emotional resilience.

5. Cultivate Empathy and Compassion

Try to see the situation from the other person's perspective. Cultivating empathy and compassion can soften your anger and help you understand the motivations behind others' actions. This doesn't mean excusing harmful behavior, but it can provide a broader context that aids in forgiveness and letting go.

6. Engage in Physical Activity

Physical activity is a great way to release the physical tension associated with anger. Whether it's going for a run, practicing yoga, or hitting a punching bag, exercise can help dissipate the intense energy of anger and leave you feeling more balanced.

7. Create a Peaceful Environment

Surround yourself with a calming environment. This could involve decluttering your space, spending time in nature, or engaging in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. A peaceful environment can help soothe your mind and reduce the intensity of anger.

The Benefits of Releasing Anger

By releasing anger, you create space for positive emotions and experiences. Letting go of anger can lead to:

Improved Mental Health: Reduced stress, anxiety, and depression.

Better Relationships: More harmonious interactions and less conflict.

Enhanced Physical Health: Lower blood pressure and reduced risk of stress-related illnesses.

Personal Growth: Greater emotional resilience and self-awareness.

Inner Peace: A deeper sense of calm and contentment.

Releasing anger is a powerful act of self-care and emotional maturity. While it may require effort and practice, the benefits far outweigh the temporary satisfaction of revenge. By acknowledging, understanding, and releasing your anger, you can create a more balanced and fulfilling life. Remember, true strength lies in the ability to let go and find peace within yourself.

i have never understood why people hate me some have told me it is because i am kind that they want to destroy me for it or see me as weak since when was my kindness treated like the greatest of sins? my love of others should not be my slaughter.

I wish that I could forgive as easily

It's such a weird feeling to give my mother all the love and compassion that I would have wanted as a child.

I tell her that it's not her fault and that she is doing her best and that it's more than enough.

I give her forhead kisses when sending her to sleep and remind her not to overwork herself.

It's... it's nice seeing her get the love she deserves but it also makes me want to cry, because why couldn't she have given the same to me?

I think being held and comforted while I cry in their arms and they whisper sweet things into my ear would safe me.

Just the two of us, existing and feeling and letting it all go and being warm and not happy, not even okay, but better.

I just really need something to hold onto while I let go completely.

If I died 5 years ago, my parents would have buried a son. It wouldn't have been my name on my tombstone. Who would have grieved for me? Who would have looked at the tombstone of that boy and wept for the woman that was buried beneath that ground?

It wouldn't have been my mom. Not my father. It wouldn't have been my brothers. I doubt my now ex even would have grieved for the real me. A handful of souls would have grieved for the woman that they lost, while a service was held for a dead boy in a suit.

The world would never have known me.

They say there are three deaths. When your body ceases to function, when you're consigned to the grave, and when your name is spoken for the last time. What if your name is never spoken? What of the woman who never heard her name spoken from another set of lips?

I see you, nameless ones. I may never be able to speak your name, for I do not know it, but I will grieve for you. You will not be forgotten for as long as I have tears to shed.

(via "Anubis and the little fox " Magnet for Sale by Queueka)