Abandonment - Tumblr Posts
"I ᖱ✺ℵт ωᾰℵт тℏḙ ω✺Իℓᖱ т✺ ṧḙḙ Պḙ,
Cᾰṳṧḙ I ᖱ✺ℵт тℏ!ℵк тℏᾰт тℏḙ⑂'ℓℓ ṳℵᖱḙԻṧтᾰℵᖱ.
Wℏḙℵ ḙṽḙԻ⑂тℏ!ℵ❡'ṧ Պᾰᖱḙ т✺ ♭ḙ ♭Ի✺кḙℵ,
I ♩ṳṧт ωᾰℵт ⑂✺ṳ т✺ кℵ✺ω ωℏ✺ I ᾰՊ."
"IԻ!ṧ" ♭⑂ тℏḙ G✺✺ G✺✺ D✺ℓℓṧ
Borrowed Time
"I’m going to leave you at some point.”
He left it open ended so he could use me, keep me anxious, and hating myself all at the same time.
I wish he’d just done it. Maybe I would have fewer nightmares by now.
Sean bienvenidos a un Japón distinto del que muchos turistas pasan de largo por las grandes ciudades turísticas. — Espero que os guste y nos vemos en próximas publicaciones, que pasen una buena semana. - 観光都市で多くの観光客が通り過ぎる日本とは異なる日本へようこそ。 - 今後の記事でお会いできることを楽しみにしています。 - Welcome to a different Japan from the one that many tourists pass by in the big tourist cities. - I hope you like it and see you in future posts, have a nice week.
Friends are like Trees 🌳
My good friend Kier gave me this advice awhile back, and it's helped me immensely to cope with my abandonment issues. I took the time to make this quick little comic in hopes that this advice will help others as it helped me. 🖤
(reposting from my Twitter because I feel it would be appreciated here haha)
Abandon All Hope
📷:Me
ⁿᵒʷ ⁱ ᶠⁱⁿᵃˡˡʸ ˢᵉᵉ ʷʰᵃᵗ ⁱᵐ ʳᵉᵃˡˡʸ ʷᵒʳᵗʰ ᵗᵒ ʸᵒᵘ
I miss you.
I miss you so much
that somedays
...most days...
I can't
breathe.
I can only
scream and cry.
But after I found out
what you did...
What you've done...
What you've been doing...
I don't want you back.
I want back everything
I ever gave
And when they ask where I am
Say "digging his grave"
And I could see myself
Never fully recovering.
Dearest Disappointment
The fear of being forgotten,
Being forgotten,
Is that the worst?
Constantly seeking his approval,
Doesn’t disappointment hurt?
The far too frequent shortage,
Of his spoken words.
I’ve cried,
Pleaded,
And screamed.
Why haven’t I been heard?
Maybe,
Just maybe,
I’m not of his “daughters” worth,
Perhaps,
It’s a living nightmare.
Or an unforgiving curse.
Being abandoned,
By one’s father,
Whom,
Guides their child about our Earth.
Was left to be alone.
Since,
All she was,
Was lonely.
Loneliness was left to be only hers.
- (d.n.k)
~My heart longs for friendships that have lasted ages. And it's the one thing I don't really have. People leave me behind constantly it's gotten easier to be the one to leave before I can be hurt.~
-a poem of a new kind
Is it just me or is anyone else absolutely terrified of any and all forms of intimacy???? like when I had my first kiss, I wasn’t excited or giddy, I was literally shaking with anxiety. Idk why. Like I was so worried that I wouldn’t know how to kiss or that the kiss would be bad and it would be the one thing to send this person off.
Oh. I see…this is an abandonment issues thing. Of course. It’s always the abandonment issues
Don't.
It's late, and dinner in this household is never late. In his life of four years in the household, dinner is never eaten past eight, or as she says the monsters will chew their years off. Buck feels hollow inside, the growling in his stomach getting louder with every passing second.
Abby is happy, crawling on all fours as she chases after the yellow squeaky toy. Hearing Abby’s giggles Ella picks up the toddler, cradling her in her arms. Abby coos, Buck slowly approaches the two, standing by Ella’s side, with Abby in her arms she looks at him and then the clock.
Finally, dinner is served. Everyone is eating as usual, the baby nibbling on her carrots, with occasional clattering coming from the plate beside. But Buck senses a shift in the air, is it the food or something else?
With deafening silence looming over their heads, which was never the case of his home, Ella looks at Buck and crouches down to him. Very sweetly she caresses and he lets her fondle his ears. He jolts up with joy, as if nothing was wrong the whole evening. This makes her giggle, the same sound she made whenever Buck would do something cute. ‘Calm down boy’, she says suddenly with a sad smile.
Ella opens the door, scooping Abby in her arms and calls Buck outside. Slowly, taking out the ball from her pocket, she throws it with full force. ‘Run’ thinks Buck, so he does with a speed of lightning. Once Buck catches the ball, he happily runs towards the house. Instead of Ella’s sweet giggles he sees a car moving away from the now dark house. He runs after it, until he cant see the car any more. Buck halts. Standing in the middle of the road, under the dark night wagging his tail, barking and barking.
Don't.
It's late, and dinner in this household is never late. In his life of four years in the household, dinner is never eaten past eight, or as she says the monsters will chew their years off. Buck feels hollow inside, the growling in his stomach getting louder with every passing second.
Abby is happy, crawling on all fours as she chases after the yellow squeaky toy. Hearing Abby’s giggles Ella picks up the toddler, cradling her in her arms. Abby coos, Buck slowly approaches the two, standing by Ella’s side, with Abby in her arms she looks at him and then the clock.
Finally, dinner is served. Everyone is eating as usual, the baby nibbling on her carrots, with occasional clattering coming from the plate beside. But Buck senses a shift in the air, is it the food or something else?
With deafening silence looming over their heads, which was never the case of his home, Ella looks at Buck and crouches down to him. Very sweetly she caresses and he lets her fondle his ears. He jolts up with joy, as if nothing was wrong the whole evening. This makes her giggle, the same sound she made whenever Buck would do something cute. ‘Calm down boy’, she says suddenly with a sad smile.
Ella opens the door, scooping Abby in her arms and calls Buck outside. Slowly, taking out the ball from her pocket, she throws it with full force. ‘Run’ thinks Buck, so he does with a speed of lightning. Once Buck catches the ball, he happily runs towards the house. Instead of Ella’s sweet giggles he sees a car moving away from the now dark house. He runs after it, until he cant see the car any more. Buck halts. Standing in the middle of the road, under the dark night wagging his tail, barking and barking.
A thing of past with a thing of present.
😔 a boy who loses his collar = a sad + lost boy #pain #abandonment #rejection https://www.instagram.com/p/CF3Z67NjkxvCmx8F0w6NbiUgCeU71Uyh9mAhS00/?igshid=7y9sj9lrh243
You aren't him, but you were for a second
If you read this and understand how it feels - you are seen.